Lull of the Deep


The beach was packed. Not that Annabeth expected anything less. Summer was winding down, November loomed just around the corner with its ominous reminder of school and responsibility. In this moment, however, November was still a lifetime away. Teenagers and young adults made the most of these last few precious days of freedom. Everywhere you turned there were bikinis and surfboards, barbeques and sandcastles, volleyball games and couples clinging tightly to one another; illusions of freedom that allowed people to believe, if only for a little while, that summer would last forever.

Annabeth Chase observed all of this from her place in the sand. She sat on her unimaginative blue towel, a large umbrella propped up behind her, providing protection from the unforgiving sun, a water bottle and package of junk food open before her. A book was spread open on her lap, but she did not so much as glance down at it. Instead, her gray eyes scanned the busy beach until they fell on two familiar figures.

Thalia Grace and Luke Castellan.

Annabeth's two lifelong best friends. High school graduates; current college freshmen. Her heart clenched at the thought. Thalia and Luke had been in Annabeth's life for so long. Annabeth's home life had always left something to be desired. Her parents divorced shortly after her birth and had not spoken since. Her mother now lived across the country in New York, where she worked for an international multimillion dollar business and rarely visited her daughter, and only called to give clipped, cynical critique on Annabeth's life. Her father remarried seven years later, bringing two new sons and a stepmother into their family. The boys integrated flawlessly into their new life, but they were only toddlers and they barely remembered their life before the marriage. Annabeth did. And so did her stepmother.

Her stepmother was not exactly the Cinderella-esque horrible stepmother. In fact, she was actually quite pleasant, more so than Annabeth's own mother. But she could never be Annabeth's mom and they both knew it. Her stepbrothers called her father 'dad', but Annabeth could never call her 'mom'. It was a rift, a tear in the family, and Annabeth was always at the center. Luke and Thalia made it bearable. Both of their home lives were even more dismal than Annabeth's; she found kindred souls in the rebellious punk and her mischievous friend. The one year difference in their ages never mattered. Annabeth was an equal, and sometimes more.

Thalia and Luke often came to Annabeth for academic problems. While she was a year younger, Annabeth excelled beyond her peers and yes, even those older than her. Annabeth took great pride in her academic prowess. Despite her undesirable home life, and her dyslexia and ADHD, Annabeth thrived. It gave her a sense of purpose, a superiority complex that she wore like armor. She was safe.

Then senior year happened to Thalia and Luke. Annabeth had not thought much of it last summer; it was just another year. But suddenly her friends were applying to colleges, packing up their bedrooms, walking across the gym to get their diplomas, talking about the unthinkable after. They both were accepted into a college only thirty minutes from their hometown. They told Annabeth not to worry, that they would stay in touch and visit her every weekend.

Bu Annabeth knew better. She felt it in her bones, in the same way she knew life would be different when her father remarried, despite his constant reassurances that nothing would change between the two of them. Sure, Thalia and Luke would not be far away physically, but they would be a world away in every other way imaginable. They would experience a whole new life at college, get caught up in their new adventure. It would not be conscious decision, but Thalia and Luke would leave her behind. It was inevitable. Annabeth would be alone; Luke and Thalia would be starting their lives without her.

This realization came slowly, painfully, as her junior year progressed and, even then, Thalia and Luke faded from her grasp. But at least she still had them, real and solid before her despite their wandering minds. Now, as Luke's room was packed away in neat little boxes and Thalia's illegible signature on the bottom of an apartment lease, things were falling apart around her. Annabeth was alone.

Even if she joined Thalia and Luke next year at their little college and gave up her dream of Stanford, things wouldn't be the same. Luke and Thalia would have a year under their belt, a niche specially carved out without her. She still would be alone. Ever since that day at on the play ground nearly eleven years ago when Thalia pushed Travis Stoll into the dirt and Luke stole his afternoon snack, she could count on her friends.

But now, Annabeth found herself back on that playground; she was seven years old once more, leaving messages on her mother's phone that would never be returned, watching her father coo over his new sons, and her stepmother coo over her new husband as she stood on the outside. She was on the outside again. Thalia and Luke cooed over their new college life, and Annabeth could only watch. Alone, even when she was surrounded by others. Life moved on, and Annabeth Chase was cast aside.

Looking across the sand at Luke and Thalia, laughing and joking without a care in the world, anger and resentment boiled in Annabeth's chest. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she tried to let those ill feelings go. She was a terrible person. Her friends were moving on with their lives, moving onto something greater and better and here she was, complaining about herself.

But it hurts.

Annabeth resolvedly tucked that thought away. She shifted in the sand, eyeing her friends across the beach. They had left almost an hour ago for refreshments but she didn't see any drinks in their hands. They were laughing with some older kids Annabeth had never seen before. College students, her mind supplied unhelpfully. Her fingers tightened around the book in her hands. Luke threw his head back at something one of them said and the sun seemed to sparkle off his impossibly white teeth, like this was a goddamn movie and he was the darling protagonist about to ride off into the sunset. Annabeth slammed her book shut. Well, her friends might be slipping through her fingers but that didn't mean she had to give them up without a fight.

For the first time in her life, Annabeth Chase thoughtlessly tossed her book to the side, its worn and beloved pages falling spread eagle in the sand. She paid it no mind as she made her way across the beach, towards Thalia and Luke.

"Annie!" Luke greeted when he spotted her, that thousand watt smile still on his face. "Hey, guys, this is our baby girl Annabeth."

Baby girl. Annabeth tried not to show how much those simple words got to her. Luke did not say them with the affection she once wished he would, but with an almost condescending tone.

"Knock it off, Luke," Thalia rolled her eyes, reaching out smack his tanned shoulders. Luke threw her a wink and Thalia popped her gum, unimpressed. The banter, the smiles, Luke antagonizing Thalia and Annabeth caught in the middle; it was the same, it was different. It made her heart ache.

"We were about to head in the water before the storm hits, Annie, wanna come?" Luke asked, his eyes gleaming as he steadily met Thalia's narrowed gaze.

"Uh – "

He did not give her a chance to reply. He did not even seem to want one. He leapt forward and caught Thalia by the waist, who immediately twisted around but Luke simply threw her over his shoulder.

"Castellan put me down right this second before I ensure you never have children!" Thalia cried, but the threat lacked heat as Luke carried her right into the ocean. Besides, they both knew he never would have gotten that far if Thalia had not let him carry her off.

They were both laughing, throwing mock threats at each other and screaming as they dove further into the surf. Annabeth stood on the beach, forgotten.

Not forgotten, she scolded herself as she waded into the warm California water after her friends. Luke invited you. They want you here still.

She kept repeated this to herself as she swam after her wayward friends. Luke's deep, low laughter reached her ears and she bobbed uncertainly in the water as she searched for them.

"Luke?" She called, taking a couple strokes further into the water. The ocean was packed, completely saturated with bodies and voices and she couldn't find her friends.

"Thalia?"

Her feet barely touched the bottom anymore, but she wasn't worried; there were plenty of people out further in the ocean, laughing and smiling. She squinted against the sun and caught sight of a blonde head being forced under the waves by a girl with short dark hair. She headed towards them.

"Luke, Thalia!" She spat out the salty sea water that entered her mouth at the call. The kids turn to look at her; they weren't her friends.

"Sorry," she muttered as they give her odd looks.

The girl grabbed the boy by the hand, both of whom are much younger than Luke and Thalia. Up close now, she did not know how she ever mistook them for her friends. The pair swam away, throwing strange looks at her over their shoulders. She let them leave, sinking low into the water so the waves lapped against her chin. As she watched them leave, she realized just how far out she had swam. She passed the drop-off, her feet kicked in deep, uninterrupted water. Nobody was out as far as her. But it did give her a great vantage point, she thought, treading water as she tried to find Luke and Thalia.

A wave washed over her head and Annabeth found herself being pulled under the water. She sputtered, kicking hard to force her body to the surface. She coughed in the chilly air, blinking the water out of her eyes. She was even further from the shore. People were climbing onto the beach, leaving the ocean behind as its waves increased in ferocity. The storm was coming in. Annabeth shook her head, mentally cursing herself for coming so far out, and started swimming towards the shore. She kicked hard against the vengeful waves, her arms arcing in long hard strokes as she sought to escape the ocean's strengthening grasp.

Another wave washed over her head. Water obscured her vison, blue and white bubbling all around, disorientating her. She could hear the rush of the ocean, crashing and calling against her ears. She broke the surface, gasping for air. Great waves crashed over her now, the ocean darkening until its once calming blue turned a menacing black. She could barely make out the people on shore. A niggle of fear found its way into Annabeth's heart as she struggled to stay upright against the surging ocean.

"Hey!" She shouted, waving one arm over her head as the other tried to keep her afloat. Don't panic, she told herself firmly, panicking will only make things worse.

"Hey, I could use some help!" She shouted again, making sure to wave her hand high above the water. A wave knocked into the back of her skull, hard and relentless with a force she never would have thought possible, and she sunk beneath the surface again. She twisted and jerked, reaching her arms up towards the surface as she tried to claw her way back up.

Her desperate gasps for air resounded like gunfire when she breached the surface once more. She only got a couple desperate breaths in before the ocean pulled her back down into its dark cruel depth. She fought against the current, but it relentlessly pushed against her, forcing her down deeper into the great blue abyss and away from the surface. Her legs were sore, her arms ached, but Annabeth kicked and pulled against the water around her. Her lungs started to burn.

Fear finally began to creep into her consciousness. Nobody had seen her. She didn't know where Luke and Thalia were. If she didn't get to the surface, she could drown. Annabeth could drown. The seriousness of her situation finally dawned on her; she was god only knows how far out from shore, trapped and struggling as a storm blew in, and nobody knew she was in trouble. An almost hysteria came over her as she lashed out at the ocean, her arms and legs flailing uselessly against an unfeeling assailant. Just a few minutes ago she was safely on shore, bemoaning the not-yet loss of her best friends, and now she was drowning. The surrealism of her situation might have made her laugh if she did not realize how valuable the precious oxygen in her lungs were.

Annabeth's arms reached out in the water above her, pumping and reaching as she tried to claw her way out of the current's iron grip. She had to bit her lip to stop herself from breathing. The deceivingly innocent blue water that pressed against her would offer no relief against the burning in her lungs. She had to be strong; Annabeth was good at being strong.

Her hair stretched out above her, tangling with her arms. The blonde locks darkened in the water, the tendrils curling lazily and catching her groping fingers, caressing them. Like this was a game and they only wanted to play, come on Annabeth come and play. She could barely see the surface now, the little glimmer of light from the sun refracting through the endless expansive of blue. The water at the surface was lighter, like the sky on a clear spring morning.

The water felt warm when she waded in after her friends, but now cold began to creep against her skin. Was the cold from the depth of the ocean (a small, logical part of her brain scoffed, of course temperature dropped the deeper in the water you go) or was it the reality of her situation, the ever growing distance between her and the sparkling surface? Her legs ached, but she refused to look down, afraid of what she might find. (A dark abyss, cold and void of light, ready to suck her in and extinguish her life.)

She was tired. Why hadn't anyone come for her? She had been gone so long (it felt so long, but it couldn't have been, she was still alive, she could still fight – the life hadn't left her body yet).

The silence was unnerving.

When first the waves called her under, she found the roar of the ocean deafening. Yet now, she heard nothing. Maybe it had deafened her. She felt alone, so terribly and horribly alone and as she fought against the cruel ocean, arms outstretched and legs fiercely kicking, she wished for her friends. She wished for Luke's teasing smile, for Thalia to ruffle her hair. She wished for her step-brother's sometimes grating but actually warm and loving laughter. She wished for her father's awkward but strong embrace.

Her vision blurred.

Her arms hovered above her, their frantic flailing lessening until they stood suspended above her, simply reaching for the sky. Her legs stilled, her body unable to fight the assault any longer. Annabeth was drowning, her battered and worn body betraying her as she sank into the cold depth of the ocean, her gray eyes fixed on the surface far, far above.

Annabeth Chase was drowning, and unless she was mistaken, there was a boy with bright green eyes pressing his lips against hers.

Annabeth stared at the boy, at the phantom that emerged from the darkness. His hands cupped either side of her face, his palms calloused and hard against her face. His fingers, as calloused as the rest of his hand, spread out across her face, tucking under her chin and cheeks and burying in her hair as he tilted her head to kiss her deeply. His lips were chapped but soft, warm and gentle as they pressed against her.

He was too close for her to get a good look at. The half of his face she could see was tan. Dark hair brushed against her forehead as he brought their faces together, oddly soft as it tickled her cold skin. His eyes were open and they met hers steadily. They were the most beautiful and vivid shade of green she had ever seen. Perhaps shade was not the right word, because they changed in the short time she observed them. Swirling, tumultuous green not unlike the waves that forced her into this mess.

Her legs drifted forward and met something solid and cool. Scales. A tail.

A merman was kissing her.

Idly, Annabeth thought mermen didn't exist. He was an illusion conquered up by her oxygen depraved mind, but his eyes. His eyes were so alive and wild and, oh, his mouth moved against hers in a way no other boy's had before. Her imagination was not this good. She could never have created this.

They were moving deeper into the ocean. The boy held her head gently but firmly in his hands, pulling her on top of him as he kissed her deeply, lovingly. She thought she could hear a song, a beautiful haunting melody curling around her as he pulled her down with him. She forgot about the aches of her body, the straining of her lungs, lost in the green of his eyes. She could feel the corner of his mouth turn up against her, smiling into their kiss. His tail flicked slowly, in measured strokes, driving them deeper and deeper into the abyss.

This is bad, part of Annabeth thought. She needed to go up not down. But the song was so pretty and his eyes were so green. His thumb tenderly swept across her cheek, kissing her with a passion she only thought possible in silly romance novels. Her eyes wanted to close, but that would mean she could not see his beautiful eyes anymore and she needed to see them.

Her lungs protested agonizingly as the merman hummed into their kiss, his song echoing in her very soul, resounding across her chest. The pressure in her chest, music aside, built to an excruciatingly decree. She needed oxygen, she needed it now. She tried to make her eyes widen, to try and tell the merman this, get him to help her.

His eyes were green, and they darkened as his song increased in volume. Annabeth told herself to fight, to thrash and kick out, but looking into his eyes she could not make herself do anything. Not if it meant an end to the song, an end to his beautiful green eyes. His fingers tightened their hold on her face, his kiss searing and deep and everything Annabeth could have ever wanted from a kiss.

Her vision darkened and Annabeth would have whimpered if she had air. No! No, she tried to blink the spots away, desperate to keep sight of her merman's eyes. His song surrounded her, like a warm blanket, comforting and consuming. Relax. Calm.

It was hard to be afraid with the merman's mouth against her, his song in her heart and eyes locked firmly on hers. She breathed, water pouring in from the ocean around them, from the boy's own mouth, filling her lungs. She barely felt the pain. All she knew was green, a thumb gently caressing her face, a song tenderly wrapping around her. Darkness encroached all around her but she clung onto that bright spark of green. She felt nothing, her entire being was disconnected and floating, but that was okay.

The merman held her tight.


A/n Um, happy almost Halloween everyone? I have no idea where this came from. It's so far from what I usually write. The ending is purposefully ambiguous, make of it what you will. I have to go do actually work now and stop avoiding my responsibilities; I hope you enjoyed! ~ *