A/N: Hey! It's been a while since I posted, so here I am! I really hope you enjoy this one, although it is dialogue heavy. It was originally in script format, but apparently that's not allowed. So then I had to rewrite the chapter. Human names will be used, although most of the time they will refer to each other as some crazy nickname or something. If you have any questions or want something cleared up, please send me a PM! I won't be replying to reviews in the story but I will be more than happy to answer your questions! And also, if you want me to continue, please tell me! Okay, so I think that's it. Ramble over :P Enjoy!

PS: Nothing belongs to me. Nothing, ya hear?

Our story begins on a bright sunny day in a beautiful forested area. Birds faintly call to each other in the distance. The hero of this tale, Alfred F. Jones, stands in the clearing with a walkie-talkie in hand.

"Hello? Hello, come in Black Sheep! Black Sheep, are you there?" he asked. A distinctly English accent replied.

"Hey, screw off."

"What's wrong Black Sheep?"

"What is that, some racist shit?"

"Code names man, we gotta use code names on the walkie-talkies!"

"Uh huh." The tone was very skeptical.

"That way the stupid Germans can't intercept our signal."

"I don't think there's any Germans out here…"

"Dude, there could be Germans!"

"In South Florida?"

"Man, there's a ton of Germans in Florida, what are you talking about?"

Alfred could almost feel Arthur rolling his eyes when he replied

"Hey Germans! This is Arthur Kirkland."

"Bro, our cover bro!" Alfred exclaimed, nervously glancing around the area for Germans. Arthur continued proving his point.

"I'm a cop. ID number 2945. We're looking for you."

"Bro, Black Sheep, bro."

Arthur sighed. "Look, why are even here?"

"Some engineers stole a bunch of NASA shit, and I'm trackin' em down!"

"And they're just hanging out in the woods?"

"I got a hunch, bro. My American senses are going all eagle wild. Don't you get like English tingles or something?"

There was a pause.

"Bro?"

Another pause. Dread started to pool in Alfred's stomach.

"Bro? Come in, bro. Black Sheep, come in. Agent Bond. Arthur."

All of his calls go unanswered. Suddenly, he's hit with a realization. He could feel the colour drain from his face.

"Oh shit, the Germans! I knew it! I'm coming Arthur!"

Alfred bolted from his position and wildly ran through the foliage, searching and calling for his colleague.

"Arthur? Iggy, where are you? I'm sorry for calling you Black Sheep, but there are so many English names that I know, you know?"

The hero burst into a clearing, only to stand face to face with a roadblock. The person stood right next to a metal platform. Gears whirred and metal poles extended straight into the sky.

"Oh hello," he said.

"Hey, have you seen any Germans around here?" Alfred asked, unsure if the person was good, bad, or just plain insane.

At Alfred's question, the person stares straight into his soul and says in a deathly serious tone,

"I AM the Germans."

The heavy feeling in Alfred's stomach increased tenfold. "Oh shit, no way."

"My name is Ludwig. I'm an engineer. Ever since I was the tiniest German, I had a dream. A dream to build the world's first space elevator."

"Oh shit, you're the Germans AND the NASA thief!" Alfred pointed accusingly at Ludwig.

"NASA was planning on constructing a space elevator themselves. If they did, how could I build the FIRST space elevator? I'd have to build the second space elevator. That is not my dream.

"Okay, well, I've got to like, bring you to jail now."

"Your friend, Arthur. He's my first payload."

"What does that mean?! Did you Holocaust Black Sheep?"

A weak voice came from the walkie-talkie still held tightly in America's hand. "Heart of America, are you there?"

Alfred brought the walkie-talkie up in surprise.

"Arthur! Where are you? Are you a ghost?"

Arthur's voice grew stronger as he said "You're not going to believe this. I don't know what happened, but I can see the earth."

Confused, Alfred replied "Yeah, I can see the earth too, Arthur. It's pretty much everywhere."

"I'm in space, you twat. I don't know what to do."

"I feel really good about today." Ludwig said dreamily.

"How does Arthur get down?!" Alfred frantically asked the German.

"Oh, I just have to push the down button."

There was an awkward pause.

"Oh. Cool. Could you do that?"

"Ja. I've got it in my truck. Hold on, I'll be right back."

"Okay, thanks."

Alfred watched Ludwig walk into the encompassing trees. There was another pause until Arthur spoke up.

"So, what's going on down there?"

"Ludwig just left to grab the down button."

"Who's Ludwig?"

"The NASA thief."

Alfred heard Arthur slap his forehead. "Alfred, he probably just left!"

"Ooooh, you're right! I forgot he was a friggin German!"

"I'm pretty sure I'm going to suffocate soon if I don't get down. I don't think there's any air up here."

"Just jump, bro."

"I'm not going to jump!" Arthur exclaimed indignantly.

"Come on, I'll catch you; I've got eagle speed."

"I am higher than you think."

"Nah."

There was another short pause as Arthur tried to process Alfred's statement.

"Nah?"

"It's the only way, man. Ludwig is gone, and I don't know how to work a space elevator. Just jump and I'll eagle catch you."

Arthur sighed. "Alright. You really better catch me though."

"I've caught so many things, dude. My hands are constantly in catch pose; that's how serious I am about catching stuff."

"All right, here I go. I'm jumping!"

Arthur jumped. There was a pause. Ludwig returned.

"Hey, I pushed the button, it should be coming down any minute now."

"Oh. That's okay, I mean Arthur just jumped out."

Ludwig stared at Alfred like he had grown two heads. "what"

"He jumped out. I'm going to catch him. With my eagle speed."

"He's probably going to land miles from here."

"What?"

"There's like wind and stuff."

Alfred considered. "Oh yeah."

"Don't worry, I put a tracking device on him. I'll just get it from my truck."

"Oh cool. Thanks."

Ludwig left again. There was a long pause as Alfred stared at the space elevator until he was hit with another realization.

"Oh god dammit, I let the Germans get away again! I should probably go home before I let even more Germans escape."

Alfred left the forest and started the long trek home.