Sunday: Kittens

"Ty Lee, those plates are the most hideous thing I have ever seen in my entire life," Azula says within earshot of the shopkeeper. Ty Lee shoots him the most apologetic glance she can muster.

"Azula, they're adorable, and they have little kitties on them. I'm an adult and I want plates with little kitties on them," Ty Lee protests fiercely and Azula sighs. That is one of the most pathetic sentences ever uttered. "Why is that so much to ask for?"

"I would perhaps like my home I do not even want to live in to look nice and not tacky. Whoever allowed you to have control over your life was an idiot," Azula says icily but Ty Lee is already carrying the plates to the counter.

"I like them. And I have to get as many dishes as possible so you can wash them..." Ty Lee smiles brightly and Azula rolls her eyes. "Oh... and I was thinking that when I was a little kid I used to have a set of chores."

"Really?" Azula asks, genuinely aghast. "Like slaves do?"

The woman at the counter cocks an eyebrow, her lip twisted in distaste. The princess, of course, ignores the peasant merchant.

"Yeah. It was icky. But I would fill our pet bowls with food and water. It taught me so much responsibility," Ty Lee says with a huge smile as she fishes around in her weathered favorite purse for silver pieces.

"That does not sound exceptionally difficult. We also do not have any pets. If you are trying to again convince me to have children with you in the future because you remembered to give your cats water as an adolescent, my answer is, as always, no," Azula states crisply, as she is wont to do.

Ty Lee finishes buying the plates. "Nope. I'm convincing you to get a pet or two with me. Because you'll get so lonely at home as my wife."

"You say that one more time and I..." Azula does not even know the appropriate threat anymore. Ty Lee seems to have become impervious; Azula has no need to waste her breath. The threat was likely going to be something about their apartment burned down by noon tomorrow.

"Pet store, though!" Ty Lee grabs Azula by the hand, the bag of plates colliding gently with the side of Azula's right knee. "There's one just a block over and it's so much fun!"

Azula shrugs carelessly as Ty Lee tugs her through the crowded streets. Republic City is too busy for being so new. Azula has no idea why she is surrounded by people, but she supposes it conceals her eternal humiliation well enough.

.

The pet store smells like fur, incense trying to cover up the fur, and animals. Generally animals. Azula remarks, "I do not like spending time in places that smell like zoos." She sighs. "But I suppose that you must be used to it, having lived in a circus and on a filthy island."

Ty Lee ignores her the minute she sees a pretty reptile-bird and starts studying it closely. She hrrmps back at it and its yellow eyes fixate on her curiously. Azula watches from the window that she has already forced open. The city does not smell much better than the shop, unfortunately.

Next, Ty Lee moves through the entire menagerie as Azula looks on with disdain. And then Azula realizes that Ty Lee is going to try to make her clean up after whatever horrifying animal she selects, and the princess nearly trips on her face running to her wife.

"You know, kittens are essentially born trained," Azula says, grabbing Ty Lee's hand and directing her attention to the little furballs on display on the other side of the room. "Are you sure you wouldn't prefer one of them?"

Ty Lee's eyes light up and she makes a shrill sound of glee when she sees the kitties.

Thank Agni.

Monday: Divorce

"I will divorce you before I do dishes," Azula says firmly as Ty Lee scratches the chin of one of her three new pets. Three. Three cats. Azula has no idea why Ty Lee is even allowed to enter stores. "I truly will."

They are sitting in their apartment, and Ty Lee has been trying to coerce Azula into putting away their new plates. But, of course, Azula puts up an admirable level of resistance. Oh, but Ty Lee will get her. Ty Lee will get her before the end even if it involves sexual coercion of the highest nature.

It really isn't like this apartment is the Boiling Rock. Especially with kittens! The Boiling Rock definitely does not have kitties!

Ty Lee makes a devious expression that Azula most certainly does not like. "Ohhhh, you will do dishes and you will give food and water dishes to these little kitties. They need a mama."

Ty Lee edges towards Azula and the princess attempts to escape before she has a little kitten set on her lap. "I am not your mother," Azula hisses at the heavy, warm, furry cat vehemently. Ty Lee giggles a she watches the completely unfazed white kitten settle on Azula's lap.

"You can't divorce me. What about the cats?" Ty Lee says with a wide eyes and a trembling lip. Azula glares at the affected cuteness and stares at the cat snuggled against her.

"I'm taking this one if we do," she whispers, and she stalks off with it contentedly in her arms before Ty Lee can show her where the new dishes are going to go.

That will certainly make things complicated...

Or more funny, she guesses.

"You should help me get the apartment together before Chief Beifong comes over to check up on you tomorrow!" Ty Lee sings and there is no response from the other room. "Azula! Azula! Azzuulllla!"

"What?" Azula shrieks.

"Come help me organize the kitty plates by cuteness level!"

AN: I'm a day behind, I know. Eek. I'm going to try to catch up. Thanks for reading this far and happy Tyzula Week!