CHAPTER VI: FAR AWAY [NICKELBACK]
DISCLAIMER: SM OWNS ALL, NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED

EPOV

It had been three months since Leah's disappearance and finding her car was the most success I had had in locating her. To say that I was not fairing well was an understatement. None of our contacts had never heard of, nor seen James, thus forcing me to change my strategy. I started looking into unexplained deaths that were high in counties across the country. The James I saw in the field, the one I heard on the phone was unstable at best. I knew that he wouldn't be able to control himself and I placed all my hope in this new theory. But even that lead me to nothing.

I sighed heavily and leant my head on the back of the couch as I sat alone in my room. What used to be my safe place, my own personal concert hall, had quickly turned into a series of maps and boards that lead to all the dead ends in my search. Anyone outside of my family that walked into my room would have thought I was planning an elaborate kidnapping scheme.

Or a murder

Pinned in the center of the board was a picture of Leah, the only one I had of her. I had managed to sneak it in on one of our Saturday's. She was smiling, relaxed as the cloudy sky of Port Angeles did nothing but make her light up. Her eyes were soft as she gazed into the camera. It was a softness that I recognized; it was a softness that I was familiar with because it seemed she only ever had it when we were in that park together. I was once the reason why she held that softness and it pained me to realize that I couldn't place the last time I had seen it on her face.

What had I done?

How could I have cut her out of my life without even realizing it? How could I have been so callous to not see that she was what I had been waiting for my whole life? But most importantly, if I ever found her would she believe me? Would she ever give me the chance to show her what she meant to me? It's not like I deserved it. If I ever saw her again, I wouldn't even deserve for her to look at me.

Next to her picture was a sketch of James. I sketched it out the moment I came home from the fateful night he took her. I could feel the anger resonating in my soul as I took in his cold, calculating eyes. I knew in my heart that he was the one that had frightened her that afternoon in the park. He approached her when others had been around. He was ruthless. He was not the type of person who sat around and waited for what they wanted to come to them. He took it. That alone made me cringe. The thoughts of what he could be doing to her unnerved me and made me want to scream. I clenched my eyes shut, trying my best to breath through my rage that was peppered with hurt and anxiety.

Edward, can we talk?

I looked up to see Rosalie standing in the doorway. Studying her face I could see that she was here out of confusion and concern. I nodded and she walked in and stood in front of the board, looking at Leah's picture. She was studying her like I did frequently.

I just don't understand, she thought. How we didn't see that the two of you were friends.

"I wanted to keep it to myself."

Why?

"It just didn't seem real, you know, that someone like her would want to spend time with someone like me."

A stiff?

I didn't have to look at her to know she was smirking.

"Yes, a stiff." I sighed. "Believe it or not, I practically begged her to be my friend."

Oh, I believe it. She's way too cool for you.
Now, that was something that we could agree on.

When did you know?

I hesitated to answer. I knew what that she meant. She was asking when I knew that I loved her.

"I don't know." I paused, "Is it possible to love someone from the start and just never realize it?"

I think you knew you loved her; you just didn't want to admit it to yourself because you had already convinced yourself that Bella was the one.

I was opening my mouth to speak when she cut me off.

I mean think about it, you guys were going on dates—

"Those were not dates."

Meeting alone in the park, talking for hours, on your special bench? She nudged my shoulder, that's a date.

And don't get me started on the biology incident I heard you tell Alice about. Fingers interlocking, she thought giggling.

"What was it you said, this time it will be different," she said laughing while perfectly imitating my voice.

I shoved her hard enough that she had to take a step to gain her footing.

I'm happy for you.

I looked at her to see that she was completely serious.

She reached up and put her arms around me, we are all happy for you.

It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders as she voiced her thoughts.

When she released me she looked at the second board that covered the raising unexplained deaths.

"How's that lead working for you?"

"Not so well."

"She said that she's not coming—

"I know what she said," I snapped cutting her off.

"She said that she's not coming back and that he wasn't doing anything to her, that she was okay. So she's obviously not in harms way."

Her hand went to the eraser and she proceeded to wipe away everything on the surface.

"From what you've told us about her, I don't think anyone could convince her to do something that she doesn't want to, so her staying is a decision she made on her own."

"What are you getting at?" I asked stepping closer to her as her hand hovered over the board.

"What I'm getting at, is that maybe, just maybe, she's changing him."

With that she wrote DECREASING ANIMAL POPULATION in the center of the board.

"Check for people hunting season out of season. Decreasing animal populations," She said placing the cap back on the marker.

"You're a genius." I said feeling a smile creep on my face.

"I know." She replied smirking.

I thanked the attendant at Hertz for her services and snatched the cars keys as quickly as possible after I had landed at Portland International Jetport. With the help of Rosalie, I had narrowed down my list from ten to five. After the first four left me with nothing, I headed to St. John Upland in Maine where the moose and deer population was significantly lower than the past five years. I didn't know what I would do if this trip did not pan out. I was quickly becoming acclimated to disappointment, but I had no idea where to go from here. All I knew was that I would never stop looking.

The entire drive had me rife with anxiety as I drove with the window cracked anticipating what would happen the moment her scent would hit me. Anticipation was nothing like the real thing, because when it happened I nearly ran off the road. I had to pull over to collect myself as my cellphone began ringing.

"Edward," Alice shouted, "Are you alright! I was searching for you and everything became blurry."

"Yes," I breathed, feeling happiness settle into my bones because for the first time in months I was content. "I found her."

After hanging up with Alice and assuring her that I would give her updates, I continued to drive with a renewed purpose. Her scent was strong in the area, weaving itself through the trees and on the winding roads with his. She had settled here, with him. My hands tightened on the steering wheel and I had to remember that this was not my car, where Rose could easily fix the damaged I inflicted on it.

I began to hear the thoughts of people and the sound of life as I neared the small town. As I passed the gas station I heard what I had been longing for. My dead heart quivered as I focused on her thoughts and blindly followed wherever they took me. The quick glimpses into her head let me see fluorescent lights and linoleum floors. She was at the grocery store less than a mile away. I slowed the car and rolled up the window, silently thanking the heavens for the Ford Taurus I was driving to help me blend in.

As I pulled into the lot, I saw her pushing a cart full of groceries out of the store, with him by her side. The excitement, the hope I felt when her scent first hit me was slowly fading away as I saw them together.

Leah was comfortable with him. Throwing her head back and laughing at whatever this newly golden eyed James had to say. Her eyes were shining with light, her shoulder's sagging with carefreeness because that's what she was, carefree without the burden of Forks, Sam, me, on her shoulders.

"You're an idiot," she said shoving him away from her.

"I'm serious!" he laughed.

"I can't wait to tell Dutch you told!"

"You can't, she'll kill me."

"Well there's nothing you can do to stop me."

"Oh, I think I can think of something."

She rolled her eyes, "You will never stop."

"Never," he said moving her out of the way to put the empty cart with the others. "One roll in the hay with me will have you saying, Edward who."

A snarl escaped my throat before I could stop myself causing them to both stop what they were doing and gaze deeply into the parking lot. I froze as their eyes drifted over me before settling on one another.

"You are hopeless." She finally said.

He walked towards her and placed his hand at the small of her back. "Hopelessly in love with you."

"Still an idiot." She mumbled under her breath as she got into the car.

I followed them via their thoughts from a safe distance to the house they were staying in and settled in the car for the night. It was torture listening to them interact with one another. It was even more painful to realize that they were friends, that she trusted him, and that he knew the same things about her that I did. But not knowing whether or not she loved him, or felt anything for him as he did for her was maddening.

I had been watching them for days on end. Cooped up in the rental and barely answering the calls from my family that seemed to come incessantly. I needed to stay focused on the task at hand, and that was to watch Leah and learn the habits of James, whom she seemed to adore. It made me sick, but at the same time I got to see her. And after not seeing her for so long, I would take what I got.

I watched the way she moved, the shape of her mouth when she spoke. How when she laughed her eyes pinched in the corners, or when James said something particularly inane her brows would pull together, wrinkling the skin between them. What I would do to touch that skin. Her hands were never idle, forever moving, either with activity or wildly gesturing as she told him a story. Her once short hair had grown, dusting her shoulders and moving wildly when she would dance around the kitchen.

I realized that I was becoming more like James who stood in the shadows once and watched her from afar when she was mine.

She still is.

And I would show her and her pack, even if it meant her hating me as I dragged her back home.