so here is my first Big Hero 6 fic!
Disclaimer: I do not own Bh6 or the lyrics of a song that I used
Can anyone guess the song I used? Haha
Hiro opened his eyes slowly and stared at the ceiling through half lidded eyes.
'Its been a year,' he thought as he rolled onto his side.
His gaze then turned to his brother's side of the room. It felt like forever since Hiro could wake up and see his brother soundly asleep, but that wasn't what he saw today. No. All he saw was Tadashi's made bed and his hat sitting atop the cover. He willed himself into a sitting position and tiredly made his way to his brothers bed. Hesitantly he sat on the edge, head hung low as he held Tadashi's hat tightly to his chest.
They say in time the pain begins to fade away, but Hiro had yet to feel his pain leave. Everyday feels like the first. Waking up and going on without Tadashi there was something he could never fully become accustomed to. Sometimes he thought it was all a terrible nightmare, and his older brother would be waiting for him down stairs. But he was so wrong. No matter how many days he spent wide awake in tears thinking of everything that could have been, no matter how much he longed to tell Tadashi just how much he truly loved him, he just couldn't now. It was too late. No matter how much he wished and prayed Tadashi wasn't gone, never to return. No matter how much Hiro wanted to deny it. Of everything Hiro regretted, not telling Tadashi 'I love you' enough was the greatest of his regrets. That was something he'd have to live with until the day he died.
Hiro loosened his grip on the hat. He laid it neatly on its spot and stood slowly, staring at the bed for a few minutes. He shut his eyes as he slowly turned to leave.
Sometimes Hiro wondered how he could go on, how he could live on with his brother gone. For so long Tadashi had been there for Hiro. No matter the situation, no matter what stood in the way, Tadashi was always there for him.
So how could Hiro move on when for so long Tadashi was there just over his shoulder? It had been a year since Tadashi… died in that fire, but sometimes Hiro swore he could hear his brothers voice in the wind. Sometimes when the pain was too much to handle he could swear he felt a hand on his shoulder. He felt his brother's presence sometimes, and he knew Tadashi had to be there with him.
But maybe he was just grief stricken. Hiro had read that the human mind was very cruel. It played tricks on you, making you see things that weren't really there, old and terrifying memories resurfacing in the night. Yes, the mind was very cruel indeed.
Hiro rubbed his eyes and picked up his comb, brushing his hair back neatly. Looking into the mirror, it sometimes amazed him just how much he looked like Tadashi. He reached out and touched his reflection tenderly wishing it really was his brother. He pulled his hand back and exited his room making his way downstairs and out the front door as quickly as possible.
After a short walk Hiro stopped and took his hands from his pockets, speaking softly, "You know… for awhile I was so mad..." Hiro covered his eyes with his hands as he drew in a deep breath. "I was mad you left me even when you said you'd always be with me. I was so mad that you were ripped away from me… I was so mad you ran into that burning building leaving me behind.. I was all alone when you left." He closed his eyes tightly. "Every night when I closed my eyes I saw you, I saw your smile and the light in your eyes… But every morning was filled with utter disappointment when I saw you weren't there. I wanted to fall asleep and stay asleep forever, just so I could see you again," he said with a painful sigh. "Every time I slept I was filled with the false hope that you would be there when I awoke and I hated it!"
His voice rose a bit louder than he intended, and he closed his mouth, sighing, trying to control himself. "I hated not being able to see you anymore… I hated the fact I lost you because of Professor Callaghan's search for revenge." Hiro sat down slowly and continued his speech. "I wanted to kill him for ripping you away from me, I wanted nothing more than for Baymax to destroy him. But that didn't happen, honey lemon stopped Baymax just in time for Callaghan to get away.. God." Hiro laughed bitterly, "Baymax showed me videos of you .. He told me how killing Callaghan was something you wouldn't want.." He tilted his head back and stayed silent for a few moments as he looked up at the sky.
"For awhile I blamed myself. If I never invented the microbots then Callaghan would have never had a reason to start that fire.. You would have never died if I didn't invent those…"he stopped feeling the wind blow harshly against his face.
Hiro smiled softly. "I get it. I shouldn't blame myself.. I know okay?" he said playfully as the wind began to settle down. "Anyway, I wanted to tell you something." He paused taking in a deep shaky breath, "I want you to know.. I-I always, always looked up to dashi." Hero smiled brokenly, "You were- are everything to me. No one, and I mean no one, can take your place in my heart."
Hiro held his hand over his heart and clenched the fabric of his shirt tightly, biting his bottom lip he let out a deep sigh trying to control himself. Suddenly he smiled.
10 year old Hiro was shoved against a nearby locker by a few third years. He looked up at their smirking faces as he spoke.
"My brother-"
He was interrupted. "Your brother isn't coming to save you, nerd!" One yelled.
Hiro tried pushing one away from him. "Don't talk about my brother! I know he's coming!" he yelled as he tried to shove past the group of boys.
One of the boys pushed back, making Hiro fall roughly into the locker again.
"It's so cute how you think he'll come to your rescue!" another boy laugher. "He's always saying how annoying you are!"
At that Hiros eyes opened wide. They had to be lying. Tadashi loved him even if he was annoying. Right?
"Oh you didn't know?" the boy asked cruelly. "He even asked us to teach you a lesson. He said he was tired of having a freak as a brother." He laughed as he threw a punch to Hiro's stomach causing Hiro to cry out and fall over once more.
They continued to shove and punch Hiro. He hoped his older brother would come, but he never did. They didn't stop until they grew tired and shoved him inside of a locker, slamming the door.
"Have fun!" Hiro heard amusement in their voices as they walked away from him.
He silently cried as he held himself protectively in the small dark space of his locker. He rubbed his eyes, willing the tears to stop their flow, but they didn't.
"Dashi..." he whimpered, holding himself tighter.
He wished his brother was there to fight the bullies off. He wished his older brother could hold him. But Hiro knew that wouldn't happen. His brother was probably busy with his friends. Why would he worry about his annoying little brother?
'Maybe those boys were right,' he thought sadly.
Hiro's thoughts were interrupted when he heard his name being shouted. He knew that voice.
"Hiro!" he heard the voice yell frantically.
It was Tadashi! The voice grew closer and closer until the locker door was practically ripped opened. Still holding himself, Hiro looked up timidly and saw Tadashi's face. His brother looked out of breath. His eyes were wide open and his lip was busted, Tadashi looked terrified. But why?
"Oh god Hiro."
Tadashi bent down and picked Hiro up gently, holding him close. Hiro was confused. Didn't Tadashi hate him? Why was he here? He didn't voice his confusion though; he laid his head on his older brother's shoulder and wrapped his arms around his neck.
Tadashi held Hiro tightly as he walked out of the school building. "I'm so sorry I wasn't fast enough Hiro." his brother said softly.
His voice sounded almost broken. This caused Hiro more confusion.
"But… I thought you hated me, dashi."
He felt Tadashi stiffen as he stopped walking. He pulled Hiro back just enough to look him in the eye, "Why would you even think that Hiro?" He sounded hurt.
Hiro frowned, feeling his eyes begin to burn. Why was his brother looking at him with so much raw pain? "They.. told me... you hate me..."
Even though he didn't want to, he broke down. There was only so much a 10 year old could take.
"I-I'm sorry dashi! Please don't hate me!" Hiro sobbed as he held his brother tightly.
He didn't want to let go, afraid Tadashi would leave him after all. But he felt his older brother's grip loosen on him as he tried to pull away. This only made the sobbing boy cry harder. Tadashi set Hiro down and kneeled in front of him. Taking the younger face into the palm of his hands, Hiro looked up at his brother through blurry eyes and saw that Tadashi too was crying.
"I... could never hate you Hiro. I'm so sorry they made you believe that. But don't listen to them, what do they know? They're jealous of you." He smiled at Hiro's shocked expression and continued "We need each other you know. I know it's hard right now, but they'll see in time, I know it. We'll show them together! You just gotta hold on." He stopped talking and grabbed Hiro small hand, placing it atop his beating heart. "You'll be in my heart no matter what they say. You'll be here." He held Hiro's hand a bit tighter and continued, "Now and forever more.. I'll be there for you always no matter what. Always.. I'll be there for you always, always, and always, no matter what." Tadashi smiled through his tears and shook his head slowly, "Just look over your shoulder, and I'll be there always Hiro."
Hiro felt his bottom lip tremble as a sob escaped his lips and he threw his arms around his older brothers neck. He felt Tadashi wrap his arms around him gently as he whispered "I will protect you Hiro. I'll keep you safe I promise."
With that Tadashi once again picked his little brother up and held him close. As they walked away Hiro noticed the group of third years who had hurt him were hurting as well, and he smiled knowing Tadashi was the one who had hurt them in return.
Hiro smiled sadly at the memory as he rubbed his eyes.
"Since that day I always thought of you as a hero. As my hero. You were always there Dashi, even when I was annoying the hell out of you."
Hiro laughed as the tears rolled down his cheeks, a broken sob escaped his lips as he held himself tighter.
"You know, sometimes when I wake up I can hear your voice ringing in my ears." He choked on a sob but continued. "At the end of my dreams you hug me so tight that I can still feel it when I wake up. And you whisper in my ear."
Hiro closed his eyes recalling his very vivid dream.
Tadashi opened his arms and wrapped them around his little brother tightly. He rested his chin atop Hiro's head and whispered loud enough for him to hear.
"When destiny calls you, you must be strong," he said quietly. "You gotta be strong Hiro. I may not be with you, but you have to hold on. They'll see in time, I know it. You'll show them. No matter what you'll be in my heart, believe me. I'll be there always. Always and forever more."
Tadashi smiled sadly as he began to fade away, but his words still echoed in Hiro's ear even when he awoke.
"Even if you can't see me I'll be there always. Always and always, I'll be with you. Just look over your shoulder Hiro."
Hiro opened his eyes slowly.
"I swear it doesn't feel like a dream though Dashi. It really doesn't. It feels like you're really there!"
He laughed, but it was a broken laugh followed by another painful sob. "I know it's crazy, but I can't help but believe it's really you reaching out to me in my dreams. You have no idea how much I wish I could just... hold onto you longer."
Hiro gritted his teeth and spoke roughly "I wish I could have stopped you. I wish that day turned out different."
His fingers dug into the grass beneath him as he spoke. "I wish I knew just how precious time really was... I wish… I wish..."
This time he couldn't continue. His chest clenched painfully as he cried for his brother. His body curled in a fetal position as he gripped the grass before him tightly. He was glad no one was around to see him. He knew he must have sounded as if he were dying. Honestly though, he felt as if he was. No matter how much time went by the pain was just as raw as the day it happened.
He managed to choke out something. "I wish I didn't miss you so much because everyday just gets worse and worse. They say it'll pass in time, but losing you never stopped hurting me Dashi. I don't think it ever will."
He closed his eyes hoping they'd stop burning so much. No. He closed his eyes in hopes he'd wake up from this horrible, horrible nightmare. He shut his eyes even tighter feeling a few tears fall quickly, then opened his eyes slowly and smiled when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He lifted his hand and placed it on his shoulder where the other hand should have been.
"Tadashi," he said softly. Hiro laughed as he sat up and noticed the night sky. "Time sure does fly huh Dashi?"
Slowly he stood and stretched his muscles. He looked down at his brothers gravesite and said, "Before I go, I want you to know even though I didn't show it, even though it seemed like I didn't, even though I wished I could have said it just one last time," Hiro took a deep breath as he cracked a small sad smile, "I love you big brother, I love you now and forever Tadashi."
As Hiro turned to make his leave his stopped in his tracks. He turned back slowly and whispered, "You'll be in my heart. Always. No matter what they say Tadashi, you'll be here in my heart." Hiro held his hand over his heart smiling through his tears, "You'll be here in my heart, always. Always and always Tadashi. I know you're here with me, just like you promised me forever ago. I promise I'll visit more often."
And with that Hiro left, not noticing a figure standing just where he was.
"Take care little brother."
The figure disappeared with sad smile.
ahh there you go! Feels man feels!
So how was it? Please leave a review!
Also, the song was indeed You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collin