Chapter 5
TOBIAS POV:
It's Tris.
The tears flow, my face becoming a waterfall, but I don't care. My knees buckle from under me, and I fall to the ground, hitting it hard, and even though pain shoots up my thighs and down my calves, I don't care. I don't care. I don't care about anything but her.
My hand slowly reaches out, making contact with the soft skin of her cheek, gently brushing down. She's real. This isn't just a figment of my imagination, she's really laying in front of me.
A choked sob bursts from my lips, and my eyes become so blurry that I can barely see her. I feel her jump a little at my sudden cry, then after I wipe my tears away, I'm meet with wide, bright, blue-grey eyes. Her beautiful, vibrant eyes.
Another sob escapes me, and I feel a soft hand swipe the tears building under my eyes. Ever so slowly she sit's up, her hand still cradling my face. I try to speak her name, but when my mouth opens, yet another cry comes out.
"Tobias…." She trails off, but her just speaking my name is enough for me.
I fling my body at her, leaning over the bed and wrapping her tiny body in my arms, holding her against me as tight as I can. She stands up, burying herself deeper into my chest, her head over my heart, my head lying on hers. My hands trace every inch of her back before slowly sliding up to hold her head. The tears still falling from my eyes soak the top of her hair, but I don't care one bit.
How is she back? How is it that the one thing I've been wishing for for three years is here? Did she even die? Or was it all just a huge lie?
To be honest, as I cradle her in my arms, her petite body pressed tight against mine for the first time in three years, I wouldn't mind if she had lied. Even if all the grief she put me though could have been avoided, having her in my arms is the best thing.
I barely back away, lifting my head off the top of hers, taking both my hands and putting them on the side of her face, letting my thumbs gently brush away the few stray tears running down her cheeks. Her eyes flit to mine, and I swear we just stare at each other for hours, maybe even days, I don't know.
Finally I hear her softly whisper my name once again, "Tobias."
My voice still isn't working, the lump in my throat making it hard to breath. She continues to wipe away my own tears, her hands on the same spot on my face as mine are on her's.
"Tobias." She says again, and I can't take it anymore.
I pull her face in, smashing our lips together in the most passionate kiss we have ever had. More passionate than our first kiss. More passionate than our first time in that room at the Bureau.
Our lips seem to move in sink, slightly opening with every movement. She allows me to slowly lick her bottom lip, accompanied by a small nibble. I hear her groan, then open her mouth, allowing my tongue full access. Our tongues dance together, and our bodies are smushed up against one another.
My hands glide along her entire being, touching every part of her face, then her waist, then ever so slowly slide up her shirt, resting on the sides of her stomach that has become very skinny. Her hands seem to do the same, though they land up my shirt on my back.
Then she pulls back, gently pushing me away from her, only to then lie her forehead on mine. My eyes are still closed as we breath hard into each others mouth, sharing our air. I hear her sniffle, but when I open my eyes, she's smiling, her eyes already open looking into my own.
"Tobias." She speaks once again, her voice cracking.
I clear my throat, taking my right hand from her side and placing it on her face before I whisper back, "Tris."
She grins widely, an unspoken greeting as she lets a laugh past her soft lips, pulling me in for another hug. I embrace her, holding her to me, letting my fingers now trace over her bare spine.
"I'm so sorry." I whisper in her ear, pushing my face further into her hair, "I'm so, so sorry."
Then she pushes me back, letting go of me, but I refuse to let go of her, my hold on her waist only tightens as she attempts to escape. Her eyes fill with regret, but she doesn't fight my arms wrapped around her.
"Please don't say that, Tobias. I should be the one to say that." Tris's angelic voice speaks, and I can feel a shiver run up my spine.
I've seen her and heard her in my dreams and from old memories, but nothing can compare to her real voice, her real skin, her real self. I was scared that I would one day forget specific features that I grew to love, as I was forgetting certain things, but as I stare at her now, I'm reminded of how beautiful and wonderful she is.
"I'm sorry," she starts, taking a deep breath between, "I have a few things we need to discuss, but I'm not going anywhere otherwise."
The smile that's been permanently carven into my face since I saw her, widens at her statement. She's really here and she's really going to stay. Gently she reaches behind her, grabbing my hand that was on the small of her back, guiding me to sit on the bed next to her. My eyes never leave her's, and I don't bother removing my hand from her skin, not ever wanting to let go.
"You need to know that I didn't lie. I did in fact die that day three years ago," though she sits in front of me, my heart is pained at the thought of that day, "You remember Matthew, right?"
"Of course." I whisper, not being able to resist putting my lips to her forehead, breathing in her wonderful scent.
"Well, him and his crew preserved my body," another shiver through my spine for totally different reasons, "While they kept us healthy….in a way….they made a serum that they call the revival serum. It only is supposed to work on preserved bodies that hold the divergent gene as it uses the divergence like a body uses caffeine to stay awake longer, the divergence kept the serum in longer, allowing it to work as it should. It restarted my heart, then reactivated my brain, keeping my physical body the way it is. I woke up two, or I guess, three days ago, Matthew standing above me, telling me all about what happened. Tobias, I just wanted to say that I truly am so-"
I interrupt her quickly, not sure if I would be able to handle an apology emotionally right now, "You said us. Where they keeping other bodies?"
"Oh, I didn't think I said that…." She stutters, trying to discreetly wipe her hands off from obvious nerves.
"Even after all these years, I know you too well. What are you hiding from me?"
Tris shakes her head, her blonde hair flipping loosely in front of her face. I gently brush back the hair, wrapping it behind her ear before taking her cheek in my hand and asking the question one more time.
She closes her eyes and I'm about to just let it go when she speaks, "Uriah, he's alive too."
TRIS POV:
I watch as pain flashes through his eyes, then relief and something I'm not quite familiar with. His eyes drift from mine, connecting with the floor as something goes through his head, then it snaps back up to me.
"Does Zeke know?"
I nod slowly, placing my hand over Tobias's that still rests on my cheek, trying to calm him. I sigh loudly, having to look away as his face is laced with guilt. He takes a deep breath, puffing the air out from his lips with a grunt.
"Okay….okay, do you know how he reacted?" Tobias asks, finally connecting our eyes again.
"Yeah, I kind of already saw Zeke and Shauna. Zeke was overjoyed. Oh and Uriah wanted me to tell you that he doesn't blame you." I reply, smiling at the memory of Zeke's reaction.
Tobias looks deep into my eyes, almost as if he's searching for something, then pulls me in for another hug, our bodies pressed tightly together. The hand that was rested on my cheek is now pressing my abdomen closer to his as he gently pushes on my lower back. I can feel the tension in his back as my arms wrap around his torso. His muscle seem as though they are larger than the last time I saw him.
"I can't believe you are really back, Tris." He breaths, and I just nod my head, allowing the comforting feeling of Tobias's hands wrapped around me.
He finally lets go slightly, keeping his arms around me still, but backing away. Slowly he lays himself down, bringing me with him. My body curls into his, one of my legs wrapping itself around one of his, and my left arm is on top of his stomach. I can feel the way his shirt forms itself onto his abs, leaving small indents. As his hand caresses my arm, I run my hand up and down his stomach, feeling every bit of muscle.
After about ten minutes of comfortable silence, I speak up, "Tobias?"
"Mmm?"
I can tell his eyes are closed, so I stop my hand up a little higher, resting on his pecks, "Did you….did you ever….move on from me?"
When I glance up at his face, I watch as his eyes quickly open, immediately catching mine, then staring. He brings his other arm-the one not caressing my arm-up, and brushes a piece of hair behind my ear. He shakes his head back and forth, breathing deeply.
"Tris, I would have never moved on from you. Zeke always tried to hook me up with some girls after he forgave me, but I always purposely pushed them away. I wouldn't even get out three sentences before they would practically run away. Everyday I thought about you. Our last conversation, our last night together," he clears his throat, and I can feel the heat rush to my cheeks, "I love you so much, Tris. The thought of never seeing, hearing, or feeling you again was….hard."
"I love you too." I whisper, pushing myself up and lightly pressing my lips to his, then backing away and hiding my face in his chest, "About that last night….did you um….did you tell anyone."
"No, it was hard enough just to say your name, speaking about making love to you would have been hell." When the words leave his mouth, I look up and notice the small blush on his face, causing my own to blossom.
The silence is back, though this time it's accompanied by awkwardness. I try to hide my obviously tomato resembling face in his chest, nuzzling close to him. This shouldn't be an odd topic for us to discuss, we made the decision together, and it's something all couples do. Though, when the subject comes up, I can't help but shy away, even if I'm talking about it to Tobias.
I can sense that Tobias is staring at me, his eyes burning holes in the side of my head. He begins to move around a little bit, adjusting us so that I'm closer to him, if that's even possible. Pretending as if I don't notice his stare the whole time is proving to become really difficult as Tobias continues to fidget.
Finally he says something, cutting into the silence, "Tris, I have to ask you something that is important to me…."
I glance up and him, then nessle back, "Okay…."
"Um….do you regret that night?"
This time, my head snaps up, immediately locking eyes with him as he begins to look anywhere but me. He's stopped moving, and my hand that is now placed on his chest over his heart can feel the speed of it increase as seconds pass. I scrunch up my eyebrows in confusion as to why he would ask this question.
Did he regret that night? Or was it just something I said or did that made me seem as if I regretted that night? Does he wish we never had done it? Did he love it….or hate it?
Tobias sighs loudly, his lungs puffing up with his breath in, "Never mind, just forget it, I-"
"Do you regret it?"
"No, I just, I thought that maybe you weren't pleased by our actions, and that that had helped you make the decision you did the day after." He responded, speaking slower as he went on.
"That had nothing to do with it, Tobias." I say harsher than I anticipated, immediately regretting my venum as his face flashes pain. "I'm sorry, it's just, if anything, that night made it harder for me to go into that weapon's lab. When I was in the room full of death serum, one of the largest parts to fighting it was thinking about you, and trying to live for you. I had no idea David was going to be in there, but I needed to do what I had to do."
He nods his head, finally looking back into my eyes, but when I see his emotions, I realize that he doesn't totally believe me. Tobias nods his head, lips pursed, and his hand continues to rub my arm.
"If it wasn't for you, Tobias, I would have been dead a long time before we even got to the Bureau. You have saved me countless times, and Matthew told me that George noticed the guilt you held towards how and why I died. I want you to know that, I did that to save my brother, not because I loved him more than you or having a future with you, but because I believed that I had a better chance than him, and I couldn't just watch him walk into an inevitable death." I explain, never letting his eyes wander as I speak.
"I'm so sorry, Tris." He says, lightly kissing my forehead while repeating his apology for everything.
"You have nothing to be sorry about."
I lean up, connecting the lips that were just on my forehead, to my own, giving him a long, sweet kiss, then snuggle back into him, allowing myself to close my eyes and enjoy Tobias's presence.
Sorry this chapter took a little longer to write, I was stuck with a ton of homework, and trust me, I would much rather be writing this. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter, please let me know what you thought. I love that in just 4 chapters I've gotten over 1,000 views! That is amazing! Thank you so much for all the favorites, follows, and wonderful reviews. I love you all so much!
~divergent24-7