Hey! I'm just trying to say that this is written about the subject of being TRANSGENDER. If you don't understand what that is, allow me to explain. I'm going to use the simple definition.

Transgender: Identifying as the gender you weren't assigned as birth. Having the body of a male and seeing oneself as female and vise versa. It usually follows by sexual reassignment surgery for those who can afford it, are brave enough to take the next step and so on.

I am transgender myself and will not take kindly to negative reviews due to the subject.

Enjoy.

Preference

Naruto Uzumaki doesn't like to be called a she. It's odd and confusing to be called something that he obviously isn't. He's a normal little boy, so what's the big deal?

What's It Mean?

When Naruto first asked Iruka to cut his hair shorter, the other male didn't think much of it. All kids like to think about their looks occasionally, and she was a young girl. Not all, but many girls her age think about how their hair or bodies look. And others think about the practicality of it all. Short hair means less problems in the field.

However, it was a little strange how when he told him to say when, Naruto didn't say so until his blond strands barely touched his ears.

"Naruto-"

"Will the boys stop calling me a girl, now? Now I'm not so girly anymore!" The hopeful shine in the young blond's eyes nearly made Iruka take a seat right then. 'Now I understand.'

"Hm, maybe." It wasn't a lie exactly, some boys think that long hair means being a girl. But he couldn't help but think that he should keep a closer eye on Naruto from then on.

That Isn't Right

"Ha! That's what you get for being late!" Naruto took to pranks when things in his life didn't work out in how others viewed him. The people around him didn't understand that he just wasn't a girl like they all thought he was. Sakura had taken to calling him delusional and Ino just laughed when he called Sakura an idiot for being such a girl.

"You don't have to pretend to be a boy to be noticed as an equal, Naruto," Ino had said to the blond. That had stung. The villagers saw it as something else to fuel their words about him. An insane monster, they called him. None of them understood.

Iruka was the only one who got it at all. It was painful and yet just so relieving that someone was on his side about the whole thing. His hair was regularly tended to as Iruka would come over to his house to do his hair every few weeks.

The older ninja had made Naruto's life a lot easier by helping him with picking out clothes to buy and often enough, buying some clothes for him while on his missions. Something society deemed male and something nice looking. It didn't take Iruka long to figure out that Naruto was actually a good kid, if a bit misguided in his actions.

Naruto wouldn't ever stop being grateful for his large wardrobe.

However, Kakashi hadn't known about Naruto's 'situation' when he walked inside the classroom when he met his new team.

"You know, some men don't like ladies that play pranks on people." Naruto didn't waste a second before his laughter ended. His eyes widened, body shook, and eyes vibrant.

"You-you go to hell!" His body ran on rage as he pulled a kunai from his pouch and threw it towards the higher ranked ninja, the unsuspecting man surprised by the fact that while it may have hit the door by his head, it made an obvious mark by tearing his mask, making a slit and catching his face a small fraction. It didn't draw blood, but it did break a skin layer or two.

Naruto quickly followed by opening the window and carefully jumping out and off the academy grounds.

A handful of Sakura's pink locks shifted before her face, her face a lit with astonishment. Sasuke's eyes came to be slits as he watched Kakashi's reaction and looked to the window after Naruto, the sympathy he felt never reaching his face.

Why?

When Naruto turned fourteen, the Chunin Exams had come to a near close. His battle with Neji was only a few minutes away when he was alone with Shikamaru. It was tense and strange, since the incident at the hospital. A few weeks beforehand, Shikamaru and Naruto had a run in with Gaara of the sand, preventing Lee's death, if only by seconds.

The two of them never had much of a friendship, and even less of an acquaintanceship. If anything, they were teens with some common interests; borderline strangers. They knew little about one another and had never spent time together outside school, the exams, training, or the hospital.

When they found themselves sitting side by side, to say that they had no idea how to communicate with one another was an understatement.

Shikamaru kept careful that he didn't let Naruto know that he was looking his way.

From what he knew about Naruto, the blond had issues, or that's what Ino said about the kid. When Shikamaru looked at Naruto, it always left him nearly speechless how the blond could keep on getting up from the verbal abuse of others. His smile seemingly brighter each time, his eyes, however, fading.

From what he could understand, Naruto believed himself to be a boy, but Ino told him that he was actually a she. It was an odd concept to grasp.

When Naruto turned to look at the young Nara, there was a question on his tongue.

"Why are you...?" Shikamaru couldn't finish. Naruto had shrugged and leaned back against the wall, ready for his fight with Neji.

"Because." He couldn't tell what question he was answering.

How Could You?

When Sasuke left, Naruto buried himself in his training. His failure to bring the Uchiha back home had only made things worse for not only himself, but for everyone. Sakura never stopped longing for him to come home, Ino and Shikamaru's relationship became strained since he was the head of the mission. While the fellow ninja didn't feel for Sasuke what she used to, it didn't mean that she had stopped caring. Hinata worried more, wondering if anyone would snap anytime soon. And team seven, everyone kept their eyes on the remnants.

Tsunade did her best to keep them busy while also treading lightly around them. Missions; missions didn't make the situation any better, but it made things easier and the tension dissipate somewhat. Naruto didn't talk to Sakura outside of missions anymore and Kakashi didn't know how to get the two of them together. When on missions, Naruto would only properly work with Kakashi if it was only the three of them, grating on Tsunade's nerves.

The other teams also noticed the change fairly quickly. Neji noticed Naruto frequenting a few different book stores instead of spending time with anyone else, the subjects ranging from complex jutsus and oddly enough, medical information on the average body.

Ino noticed from a distance how Naruto would talk to Shizune at night while at Ichiraku, shady and suspicious looking from her standpoint if the they actually looked grave and serious.

And it didn't end there. No one acted like they used to.

Even Azuma wasn't sure how to breech the subject to try and mentor his own team through the pain. He had never dealt with a betrayal like a comrade abandoning everything the way Sasuke did. Maybe some bad separations.

Nothing seemed to be perfect, or even close.

What Is This Way?

News of Naruto checking in with Tsunade more and more often reached the ears of the Rookie 9. fairly quickly. Neiji wondered if he was sick, Shikamaru also asked the same question, however when presented with the blond afterwards - they felt an uplifting air around him. Sakura too wondered what the matter was about, but Naruto ignored her inquiries.

Shizune was also seen spending time with Naruto in a way that seemed as though she was monitoring him.

It was odd to most.

He's Gone?

When Naruto left the village to be taught by Jiraiya, no one expected him to come back and actually change. His voice deeper, and face more hard; it was a very difficult situation to grasp indeed.

The only people that were properly expectant of said changes were Tsunade and Shizune. The very fact left Kakashi floured. She knew more about his own student than he did. And unexpectedly, that hurt.

Sakura wasn't sure how to approach Naruto and ask him about how he seemed so much more of a he. And his very presence was far more intimidating than two and a half years before when he left. His height, his eyes, his demeanor, his very personality even. He was so much more of the man he claimed to be. And it was frustrating to not know, or even understand how.

Shikamaru Nara saw the way his parents tensed when they heard the news, almost disapproving. He didn't see the problem, Naruto, while odd, didn't appear to be hurting anyone, so the problem wasn't seen. As far as his parents saw, Shikamaru was missing something. The young Nara didn't think he was.

New?

When Sai entered team seven as a member, Naruto wasn't as livid as those around him figured he would have been. His anger wasn't towards the raven replacing Sasuke. It was more towards the fact that Sai had a rather... crude attitude and a plastic exterior.

That, and he insulted Naruto in a way that he hadn't been spoken to in a long while. A few years and six months.

He asked if Naruto was even a man at all. The blond wouldn't speak to him for a long time after they embarked on their first mission together; retrieve Sasuke. It wasn't until they entered Orochimaru's compound that Naruto even began to acknowledge him as even a person.

When they arrived back at the village, Sakura and Yamamoto watched in befuddlement as Tsunade called Naruto in for a 'special' medical examination.

Danger Days

When Naruto was confronted by Kakashi and Sakura about his changes, the apathetic gleam in his eyes unnerved them. He shrugged his shoulders and went back into his apartment, leaving an open invitation for them to follow after him. Sharing a look, they entered and took in their surroundings. Kakashi noted that it was different looking than what he remembered all those years ago.

The floor was clear of any clutter and little to no mess could be found. It was odd, to see such evidence of Naruto's maturity.

After a few hours of talking and reminiscing, Sakura had popped the question, "How did you... I mean? Your voice is deeper, and your chest looks flatter. So much like a boy's."

Kakashi had leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. He watched as Naruto sighed and leaned back in his place on the couch.

"I don't expect you to understand. I'm not really all that different."

Kakashi wasn't too sure how take that, but something did seem to click into place. 'The rumors make so much more sense.'

Never Thought A Day Would Come

It took awhile to notice, but Sai and Naruto had started acting less hostile towards one another. The arguments and inappropriate taunts seemed to happen far less with even more time in between until such occurrences simply just stopped all together. In fact, after a year, Sai seemed to open up to Naruto and Naruto the same in return.

The blond was often found with Sai at his side more often than not, and with his other teammate less and very briefly when found together.

Ino had come across them while they were in the middle of a conversation she had a hard time comprehending at first.

"It's pretty funny, I have to say," Sai had told Naruto while on the training grounds. The said ninja had his weapons sack open with new tools being stocked for later use. He shrugged, smiling lightly.

"Hmph, maybe for you." He took a seal and made sure the paper wouldn't crinkle too badly, it would become useless if the ink were to be tampered with.

"I didn't expect it. Although, I have heard stories of others, sunshine,' he chuckled as the blonde's face became aflame with color.

"Of course, you just had to go with that instead. I liked dickless better. But... others?" Sai had only nodded his head and took the others hand in his own.

When Did It Even Start?

When the village became aware of the fact that Sai and Naruto were living together, it was the talk of every shop and gossiper to be found. It wasn't any better with the actual ninjas, either. Worse, in fact.

But that was okay.

Despite the whispers and the fingers, neither really cared. Sai never cared what others had to say about him anyway. And Naruto? He was used to it. But he knew better.

Naruto knew that none of them would ever understand how lucky he truly was. He used to curse that he was different, but they would never know how lucky he felt to have, if only few, people who accepted his more colorful traits. He knew that they would never see how Sai treats him behind closed doors, like an art piece to be treasured.

Naruto knew that they could never have the love that he has for the few people in his life, romantic or otherwise. They wouldn't have a figure in their lives that gave them a reason to keep going when things seemed to be truly bleak.

He knew that they'd never know what Sai suffered through in his childhood, and if they did, only Kakashi would understand, just barely. Or how they'd never see what both struggle to keep inside for every day they live.

There was a lot that they would never understand or see, but that was okay. Even if the two were broken in ways that the world couldn't see, that would be okay. Because together, they would be less broken together in a way that no one else could have for themselves.

Even if they never understood.

Honestly, this fanfic was something that I ran out of steam for half way through, being transgender is something that I live with, but this fic just kind of took a toll on me. I wasn't really sure where I was going with it after awhile. But, I hope you enjoyed it. Drop a review and maybe favorite it? Don't be a stranger!

Also, if you find any errors, please, tell me.