A/N: Hi, guys! I know this is a little shorter than usual, but it's more of a drabble, I guess. *shrug* Whatever. Day one of the week-long countdown!

Title: Conundrum

Author: liketolaugh

Rating: T

Pairings: None

Genre: Friendship/Angst

Warnings: None

Summary: For the 220th night countdown run by lenaleelee17 on Tumblr. Day 1: Favorite Character.

Disclaimer: I only wish I owned D. Gray-man.

Day 1: Favorite Character - Allen Walker, friends

When he was little, Allen used to hide behind things to watch other children play.

He didn't often get the chance, but he when he did, would sit and watch them skip rope and run around and wrestle for hours at a time, wishing he could join them.

The one time he had, though, he'd gotten injuries and insults he wouldn't soon forget. He never tried again.

No matter what he'd said at the time, how bitter he'd been, Allen had always wanted friends. He'd wanted people to play with, to talk to, people who'd miss him if he died. It was a secret want, a guilty want. People like him, they didn't have friends. That was a privilege reserved for the wholesome and the wanted.

It was like that on the streets, and it was like that in the circus. And then there was Mana.

It was… a little different, with Mana. They travelled too much, so he still didn't have any friends. But he had Mana, and a father was almost like a friend.

Allen took care of Mana the best he could, but of course, it was never enough. And in the end, Mana died.

With Cross, it was a bit like with Mana, only he didn't have Mana, but he still had no friends. Cross was too rough and abrasive to be friends with, and Allen felt lonely again. He went back to watching other children.

Cross caught him doing it once. He'd snorted and pushed him out of his hiding place, and to Allen's surprise, he'd been invited to play. (Cross had given him double the usual amount of work that night, though, for being 'lazy'.)

They'd stayed for months in India, and Allen made his first friend. Narain.

Narain had been a good friend.

Then there was the Order, and everything changed.

Lenalee was nice, and she yelled at him when he took risks and laughed with him and worked with him. She smiled at him and teased him and learned to guess when he was worried or scared.

Lavi was a lot like him, with a mask and a part to play, but Allen left Lavi's mask alone and Lavi left Allen's, and somehow it worked. Lavi teased, him, too, and wrestled with him, sparred. Pinned him down and tickled him once, too, which had been pretty weird.

Kanda was an asshole. But he was a determined asshole, at least. And he liked Lenalee.

Miranda cared about everyone. Marie worried about him. Krory seemed to idolize him and Lavi. Timothy made everything more fun.

Allen didn't have to hide and watch anymore. He had friends.

And he'd never had friends before, so he'd do anything - anything at all - to keep them.

There we go. Not a lot to go on, but, hey. Allen. *waves vaguely* Thanks for reading, and please review!