A.N.Got bored so I began rummaging through some ancient prompts and came upon this jewel from pure_ecstasy6. So I thought what the hell I always liked his/her stories so here you are. Surprise. :D

The prompt: Head lice; Miranda freaks out over the fact that she got head lice from the twins, and gets Andrea to wash her hair with the special shampoo stuff. Possible ending with Andy at the townhouse and itching her head and Miranda having to do hers because she doesn't want Andrea infecting Miranda again which brings them closer and they admit their feelings for each other.


Chapter 1

Silver and gold with the texture of Japanese silk, Miranda Priestly's hair was truly a work of art of the finest quality and the Fashionista knew it. That's why she kept the beautifully coiffed mane in such pristine condition even whilst curled deep within the confines of her bed's duvet, she made sure that the pillowcases were made of silk as not to cause frizz. She also used the finest shampoos and conditioners known to man that was so ridiculously expensive that she once overheard one of her old assistant's quip to Emily that it must have unicorn's blood in it. At nearly three hundred a bottle perhaps the girl was right,

However, it was worth it for who was Miranda Priestly without her snowy white coff. It was like a lion without his mane or a peacock without his tail.

Miranda peered into the mirror and ran a comb through her hair. She practically purred at the feel of the plastic teeth scratching against her scalp. But despite how pleasant it may have felt she couldn't help but frown because for the last three days her head had become unGodly itchy. She tried everything to quell the irritation from changing shampoos to brushing it constantly but still, it always came back.

She sighed in defeat and tossed the comb precariously upon the vanity before getting up to head downstairs for an afternoon glass of wine. Usually, she would have a glass much later but today she managed to take a little time off thanks to Andréa who brazenly insisted that 'she had everything under control'. At the mere thought of the silly girl, Miranda's lips subconsciously tugged upward into a small smile. If anybody else had demanded such a thing they would have no doubt have been on the streets jobless within a matter of seconds but Andréa was an altogether different matter.

The girl, with her large doe-like eyes and bright smile, was the kindest most selfless person Miranda ever came across. Part of her wanted to crush that spirit but another thankfully larger part of herself wanted to relish in it.

After pouring herself a generous glass of wine in the kitchen, the fashionista strolled into the living area and settled on a plush distressed leather couch.

Sinking into its depths, she sighed in contentment letting her mind drift back to chocolate eyes and wide broad smiles.


The sound of the door opening and slamming shut followed by the heavy clumsy footsteps of youth snapped her out of 'Andyland' into reality. She glanced upward, smiling when her twin girls came into view wearing identical crinkled school uniforms and flushed forlorn expressions.

"Oh hello, bobbsies, how were you two's day?"

"Fine." They replied simultaneously in their usual twin way before they went to make a beeline for the stairs.

Miranda nodded pleased more than what she would care to admit by the answer. Her babies, though she loved them dearly could be well, petulant brats.

"Oh wait," Cassidy halted mid-stride, turned, and began rummaging through her backpack. A second later she pulled out a mint green piece of paper with largish black writing scrolled across it then carelessly thrust it towards her mother. "Here, our teacher told us to give you this."

She nodded as she gently took the item from the child's hand. "Alright go wash up, dinner will be ready shortly." With the promise of food they left in a hurry. Miranda rolled her eyes. It seemed like her girls were nothing but stomachs with eyes nowadays. She took a sip of wine as she glanced down at the flyer and began to read.

Ms. Priestly,

We at Dalton Academy regret to inform you that there has been an outbreak of head-lice among the students and that it is of the highest of importance that each child be checked and/or treated before attending school once again.

Lice! A mouth full of red wine sprayed from thin pink lips onto the flyer and a twenty-five thousand dollar rug.

Thoughts of the disgusting little creatures crawling through her children's flaming locks made her stomach turn. "Cassidy! Caroline!" She uncharacteristically screeched.

A moment later two sets of feet came clomping down the stairs. "What! What is it?"

"Come here." She waved them over a bit manically.

Thinking that they were in some sort of trouble, they reluctantly obeyed.

"Um," She swallowed thickly, steeling herself. "Have you two, and be honest with me now girls, have you two's heads been…. itchy?"

Both girls' eyebrows scrunched together and cocked their heads to the side unknowingly doing a dead-on impression of confused puppies. No doubt wondering if their mother had lost all her sanity.

Miranda mentally cursed and sighed out loud. "Caroline, come here bobbsey." Her elder of five minutes hesitantly shuffled forward until she was just an arm's length away. "Turn around." Once she did, Miranda parted her legs and pulled the girl close. "Sit." The girl slowly lowered herself to the flooring still not sure just what the heck was going on.

The older woman picked through the girl's hair parting it in places she knew the little devils would hide and sure enough. "Oh my God." Her poor bobbsey's scalp was covered in them-tiny brown disgusting bugs hanging onto the roots of crimson hair like they were tree trunks they seemed to look back at her mockingly.

"Alright darling, you can get up now. Cas-She glanced over at Cassidy and her words died in her mouth when saw the other girl clawing at her head like a mental patient. Well, she didn't need to check her to know that she had them also.

Growing up in the poorest part of London she'd seen and even had them a few times as a child. Back then there wasn't much you could do. Her own mother used to use lard to get rid of them. She'd slather their heads with the gooey mess then wrap strips of cloth around it and make them wait an hour before washing it out. When Miranda complained questioned her at the time about it she said it smothered them or something of that sort. Miranda couldn't recall but she remembered how awful it was and also how her mother hurriedly stripped the beds and boiled the sheets.

You have to act quickly, Miriam, or they'll spread like fire. Her mother's voice warned.

With that in mind, Miranda hurriedly got up and rushed to the kitchen where Cara was just beginning to set the table. "Cara, when you're done here I need you to strip the twins beds and get rid of the sheets. I don't care what you do with them throw them away, burn them, whatever, I want them gone then when you're done I want you to gather every brush and comb they have and bring them into the kitchen. Understood?"

The maid gave Miranda curious look which gradually turned into a knowing one. "Yes, Ms. Priestly."

Miranda turned and left the room, pulling out her cell phone she scrolled through the list of contacts until she came across the one she was searching for. Pressing it, she only had to wait two rings before a familiar voice greeted.

"Miranda Priestly's office, Andrea Sachs speaking."

"I need you at the townhouse."

"Miranda?"

The elder woman could practically see the confused expression on the girl's face and rolled her eyes. "No, a Chinese laundryman, just get over here now, Andréa."

"Yes, Miranda." Click.

Miranda let out a long drawn out breath. There was nothing to worry about. Everything was going to be alright Andréa was going to take care of everything. Like she always did.

Pale pink lips quirking into a small smile, Miranda absentmindedly scratched the place above her right ear.

TBC...


AN: Not gonna lie, I had 'em a couple of times when I was a child, just like the girls I got them from school though. It's like my grandmother said it's not a disgrace to have lice, it's a disgrace to keep 'em. Just going to be one more chapter to this.