Okay, so I was rewatching Become Man, and I noticed something I never had before, and this idea instantly came to me. I'm supposed to be doing readings for my classes, but this suddenly took priority. This is a missing scene from Become Man, and I don't own any of the dialogue at the beginning since it came directly from the episode itself. I am also putting a trigger warning on this story…just in case. This is my first Ripper Street Story, so please be gentle!
Disclaimer: I do not own Ripper Street. If I did, Sackson would be happy and wouldn't have gone through this Duggan fiasco.
Escape
Susan froze when the door opened, holding her breath as Rose stood and left the room. She didn't look at him. She did not want to look at him. Nothing that he could say to her, nothing that he would do to convince her, would change her mind about his actions.
There was silence for a few moments, and after a while she thought that perhaps he had thought against speaking to her; that he realized she needed her peace. That was, until she heard him speak to her. "That woman…Raine," she heard him say, now right next to her. "I couldn't see her intentions, but she was a crazy woman, Susan. I saw her. I thought she was going to take you from me."
She could hear the emotion in his voice and she knew he was thinking about what would have happened if Rainehad taken her from him; she knew he likely saw the knife and thought the worst. But she didn't speak…she couldn't bring herself to forgive him for it, for she knew Rainewasn't going to kill her. Raine had pulled out the knife to do as she asked and release the men she held, and she herself had been killed for it.
"I thought…I thought I was saving you darlin'," he said quietly. She felt his arm move so his hand rested just over top of her shoulder and she closed her eyes, shrinking away from his touch and trying to swallow the lump that had grown in her throat, threatening to choke her with unshed tears.
Regardless of what he thought he was doing, he had still killed her—a woman she had come to care for and sympathize with in the short time she had known her. She cared nothing for his thoughts. Nothing. To him, they were merely an excuse he was hoping she would buy so he would be forgiven. Well…she was not falling for that.
He thought he was saving her, but instead, he had further condemned her. Raine was Susan's way of escaping Duggan, her way of escaping the unbreakable deal she had foolishly made with him when they had first arrived in Whitechapel. Of course, she would still try to do as Rainesaid, to not give into his demands, but if she could not pay…she wasn't so sure she would be able to do just that.
Running was no longer an option.
There was silence for a few moments while Jackson waited for her to speak, waited for her to do something, but when he realized she wasn't going to, she heard a small sigh escape him. His fingers grazed the water by her shoulder and she tensed, still refusing to look his way.
"The water grows cold. Do you want me to go warm some up for you?" He asked slowly, pulling back from her and stepping back from the bathtub. "Maybe fetch you some more towels?"
When he had moved, Susan returned back to her previous position, resting against the back of the tub. "No," she said, almost inaudibly as she continued to stare straight ahead. "I want you to leave me in peace."
She waited for him to protest, to try and convince her more. To her great surprise however, there was only a moment of hesitancy before she heard him move to leave the room. Her eyes closed as she felt the lump in her throat grow more painful and she slowly began to slide down toward the water, the door closing a moment later.
A she slide down toward the water, her mind turned to Duggan and she tried to choke back the sob that was threatening to escape. No longer had she any escape from the man. She had seen her chance in Raine, her chance for someone to confide in and her chance for help and courage in her situation. Now Raine was gone, and that chance with her. Nothing her husband would try could ever free her from her situation, no matter what. There was no escape anymore. The barber was right: she would fail in payment one month or the next, no matter how much she tried to deny it, and she would have to give him what he wanted.
She hesitated just before her nose hit the water before fully submerging herself under it, with no intention of resurfacing. Her escape in this lifetime was gone, but there was one other way, and remaining under the water would help her achieve that. She couldn't do it anymore… the pain of it all was just too much.
She felt herself grow lightheaded after a while without oxygen, unconsciousness slowly slipping upon her. It was in the last few milliseconds before she completely blacked out that she was suddenly pulled out of the water, her lungs instantly gasping for breath against her will. She was so disoriented from the lack of oxygen and the close proximity of unconsciousness that she didn't quite process what was happening when she first opened her eyes. Jackson was back, saying something to her that she didn't quite hear.
"Jesus, Susan, what the hell do you think you're doing?" She heard him shout at her when her shock began to wear off slightly. His arms were still tight around her, holding her securely as he helped her out of the tub.
She didn't answer him, her eyes averted once more.
"I was going to do as you said and leave you in peace, but then I thought that if I was going to do that, you may as well be comfortable," he continued in the same tone as before. It was then that she noticed the extra towels and the pitcher of steaming hot water that was placed hastily on the counter, some of the towels falling off. "I'm glad I decided to do that, because I did not know leaving you in peace would mean you would do this! Why, Susan?"
Susan pursed her lips slightly and held close to the towel he had draped around her, still avoiding his gaze. If she saw his eyes, she was afraid she would give in to him, and that was the last thing she wanted.
"You robbed me of my escape," she whispered hoarsely. "So I decided to find my own."
He knew of her debt to Duggan, but he knew nothing of what he truly wanted with her. He wouldn't understand her meaning.
Hesitantly, she glanced to him when he didn't speak and saw the look of shock on his face. She let out a small sigh after a moment and moved to grab her dressing gown, shedding the towel and pulling the silken material around her small frame. "I asked you leave me in peace," she said softly as she moved to the door leading back to her bedroom. "Leave me in peace." Please, she added in her mind before entering the room and curling up into the fetal position under the covers.
But he didn't leave her in peace. He didn't speak, but she knew he remained in the room to watch her; to make sure she didn't try to find her own means of escape again. She didn't say anything in return, knowing he wouldn't listen, and simply allowed herself to slip into the darkness of sleep.
It wasn't a very permanent form of escape, but she supposed it would do for the time being.
Please leave a review if you wish and tell me what you thought!
~CountessRipper