A/N: And here's another one.

Of all the ideas she had about their honeymoon, a gun fight in her bikini on a beach in Mexico was not one of them.

The guests of the resort had scattered, leaving her and Garrus hunkered down behind a bar, being splashed with alcohol and shattered glass as the bullets ripped through the shelves above them.

She grunted and heaved herself up, firing off rounds and taking down a rogue Cerberus soldier that had gotten too confident. She glanced at Garrus, watching him pick off a few in quick succession. He joined her a second later behind cover, eyeing her to make sure she was still in the game.

"Why does this shit always happen to us?"

She had to laugh at that. This whole situation was insane, but not so insane that it topped the list of the wildest things she's ever been through. Garrus smiled and then it dropped a moment later when another bottle shattered. She shielded her face from the flying glass and growled. This was slightly funny, but it was also starting to piss her off. All she had wanted to do when they arrived was swim in the ocean, eat food, and ravish her husband, but Cerberus decided they still had something to prove.

"Think we can get a refund for saving the day?"

"We already got a comped room based on our names alone, I don't see why not."

He grinned again before going back up and picking off a few more. They worked best as a team, so she let him stay perched behind the bar while she dove for cover behind a boat rental stand. The bullets bounced off the metal, distorting her sound, but it provided her ample coverage and allowed her to see far more than she could behind the bar.

She cursed as a charged bullet ripped through the metal by her head and slammed into the concrete building a few feet from her. Her lip curled, chastising herself for not bringing better weapons. Of course, they technically weren't allowed to travel with heavy weaponry, despite their high-level clearance through all systems in the universe, but it was crap like this that reminded her that those rules blew. Especially since people were still hell bent on killing her (ok, maybe just Cerberus) and she had a giant target on her back.

But they had only opted to bring their heavy pistols, thinking there was no possible way they would be used.

This is what she gets for not thinking ahead.

"Shepard!"

Her head whipped over to Garrus, running towards her, gun raised, and she realized she had kept in cover for too long, allowing a Cerberus agent to sneak up on her. They had a standard issue knife held up, coming down rapidly towards her neck, and she sprung into action, grabbing the wrist and slamming it into the ledge of the boat, effectively breaking it.

She took her pistol and shoved it into the soft, unprotected spot of the armor. She felt his hand land on her shoulder, before she pulled the trigger, and painted the white boat next to her in blood and gore.

She turned to locate Garrus, who had her back to her, in cover behind the boat with her. She dared to look over the ledge of the boat again, seeing the agents were beginning to fall back slightly. She blew hair out of her eye and touched Garrus' shoulder, letting him know she was moving up in cover. There was a boulder just a few feet away that would allow her even better line of sight.

"Shepard, wait-!"

She ignored his call, knowing he was worried about her being without shields, but this was an easy battle. There were only three agents left in the field, Garrus taking one at the same time she took the other out. There was one agent left, withdrawing from the battlefield after seeing all their comrade's dead and on the ground. Shepard grinned and called over to her husband, who had stood up, eyes trained on her as she also stepped out.

"I call dibs!"

"Shepard!"

She giggled as she took off down the beach, catching up to the stumbling agent and quickly putting him down with a gargled yelp. She stood triumphantly over the body, feeling alive like she always did after a fire fight. She panted, basking in the sun for a moment before turning to smile at Garrus, who was holding something in his hand other than his gun. She paid no mind, though, waving over local authorities that had taken cover in the restaurant just a little way up the shore.

She began walking towards them to greet them, waving off Garrus' call. She wanted to get this settled quickly so she could get back to their room and shower off the blood she could feel drying on her skin. Then, they were going to make sure there weren't any other Cerberus hideouts anywhere else in the town. She wanted to be normal and enjoy her honeymoon without blowing some soldiers head off.

"Shepard, please- "

"Hold on, let me take care of this."

She made it to the group of officers that had stopped halfway on the beach, nodding at them professionally. She stood up tall, noticing a few of the men averting their gazes. One of them men couldn't stop staring at her chest with a blush and she nearly rolled her eyes. Probably a recruit.

"Gentlemen. Commander Shepard, former Alliance Navy. All agents have been eliminated; however, it wouldn't surprise me if there's another hideout somewhere in town. I plan on taking a good long walk around myself. I have contacts that can also give information to better aid you in case this becomes a problem. Usually, if Cerberus can find a place to set up camp, they'll keep coming back no matter how many times you dispatch them. I'll gladly take care of anything further- "

"Shepard!"

She turned and furrowed her brow, a little peeved Garrus had interrupted her, but her mouth went dry when she saw him holding up a scrap of cloth. That was in the same design as her swimsuit. That looked suspiciously like a bikini top.

Her eyes widened when she looked down and realized her top had fallen off sometime during the fight. She had been fighting topless. And she was now standing in front of a group of men topless, reporting the details of a gory gunfight she had won.

She turned around and snatched it out of his talons, quickly wrapping it around her chest and tying it tighter than it was ever intended to. She couldn't believe this. She willed her red face down to a shade of pink before she turned around, glaring at every single one of the men in front of her.

"You never saw my breasts, got that?"

Her menacing tone brooked no argument. She nodded, "Good. Now clean this mess up!"

The men jumped back before turning on their heels, leaving her and Garrus in the middle of the beach. She groaned.

"They're going to tell everyone they saw my breasts."

"Yeah," Garrus agreed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

"We're not coming back to Earth for a very long time."