The urge Naruto currently felt might seem to be unnatural to those who knew or would come to know the boy, but he genuinely felt like stabbing something right now. Repeatedly. Preferably until it bled dry.

He paused. Okaaaa-y, that last bit might have been an exxageration, but not by much.

-Because kami-damn-it, voodoo dolls didn't cut it at this point...-

And yes, that might or might not have been an unspoken confession to a bad habit he quite possibly had.

(But you'd never hear him say it! 'Ttebayo...)

First of Kaka-nii... erh... Kakashi-sensei... disappeared off to whatever place he went, then Sakura had to go moon over Sasuke again, all the while hitting yours truly to bolster her subsequent waning self-esteem. Then Tazuna's little brat had to go run his mouth, and he couldn't even do something because 'even' he knew not to hit his female teammate, her object of infatuation, the client, and the latter's family.

As it was, he had settled for beating the shit out of the trees in this clearing he found, in order not to reminisce about just how shitty his life was.

After all, while he had Jiji, Kaka-nii, Teuchi, Ayame and Iruka-sensei, the fact that these people who genuinely wished him well could be counted on one hand...

Well, it was depressing to be honest.

But yeah. He wouldn't cry about it. Couldn't cry about it. He had sworn off being emo for the rest of his life, after he had been compared to Sasuke after a particularly bad week. That didn't mean he didn't brood once in a while -case in point-, but he'd never let it get him down for long.

Naruto woke up with limbs feeling like lead, causing him to scrunch his nose. He hadn't gone that far while training, did he? He definitely shouldn't feel this sore after only a few hours. And what was up with this falling asleep randomly? He knew better than that. Had to know better than that after...

He tensed, as he felt a presence near him. A soft giggle reached his ear, and this girl, erh... girl? At least he thought it was a girl, but he was getting confusing signals, and he couldn't figure out why for the life of him because the... girl..?

Ugh, it was clear he was just waking up, because his mind was running in circles.

"Who are you nee-chan?", he just plain out asked.

"Male for starters...", responded dryly.

Oh, this one was GOOD. He practically raised himself in the red light districts, and had seen plenty of crossdressers -mostly drag queens- as a result, but usually he was able to peg them pretty quickly.

The fact that he kept pegging this guy wrongly however...

Naruto laughed sheepishly after the slightly awkward coversation that followed this revelation. Not because of the coversation itself, but the fact that, in the comfortable silence that followed he had realized that...

"I'm lost, ttebayo..."

Haku had to stiffle another giggle.

"I'll lead you back... It's the least I can do..."

They returned to a tense Kaka-nii, who was glaring daggers at Haku, much to Naruto's confusion.

The boy in question raised his hands in self-defense.

"I couldn't help it!", the feminine boy argued against the unspoken accusation. "I came across him in the clearing two miles southwest of here, and well... I could hardly let him walk alone, when he professed to not knowing where the house was..."

"Eh..?", was the only thing that left the blond's mouth. Not quite sure how to fit these pieces of the bigger picture together. "Do you know each other?"

Kakashi shrugged, and Haku replied, "You could say that", the boy said, "I thought you knew", with a glance at the former. "Our units are tentative allies against Gato's oppression of Wave..."

"EEEEHH!"

Zabuza and Uzu were raiding one of Gato's storehouses in the meantime. That is to say, they walked in, cherry picked what they wanted, and walked out while Uzu's magic kept the guards in a slumber.

The redhead was reading through some old training scrolls from Uzugakure, having been attracted to them through the mention of the village that shared her name.

"Hmm... This Fuuinjutsu skill", she enquired, "Is it any good?"

Zabuza shrugged and absentmindedly said, "In the hands of a skilled practicioner it can do anything from sundering to creating Gods. But on the lower levels it's pretty meh, the same results being able to be gotten with plain Jutsu. Admittedly, having some seals on hand is handy, but I'm not really one to make them myself though. Too much fiddly stuff. A few storage seals on top of explosion and paralyzing tags are enough for me."

Uzu perked up. "Explosions?"

She was always looking for ways to augment the damage she did with her attacks, the base stats being rather low due to her choice to specialize in healing.

"My precious", Uzu cooed to her first explosion seal, rubbing it against her cheek, "I'm going to have so much fun with you..."

"Oh God", Zabuza groaned at the sight, "I've created a monster..."