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Beyond Reason

Chapter Fifty-Nine – Going on

Yup, Jack thought while strapping his P90 routinely to his protection vest. Life had the strangest tendency to just go on.

With used movements, the Colonel grabbed his Berretta and stashed it into the holster at his thigh, followed by his combat knives. His body did the routine habitually but Jack couldn't stop the smile that spread over his face. It was SG-1's first mission after the Stargate had finally been repaired and opened again, and they had been cleared for gate-travel again, and it just felt so good to be back.

It had been five days since he'd gone back on duty and for once Jack hadn't even minded the shitload of paperwork he'd been greeted with. Reynolds and Dixon had obviously been rather relieved they could hand it back over to him, even if Reynolds had helped Jack out for another two days with the majority of the documents or Jack would have believed himself to still be stuck under a mountain of forms and mission reports. Dixon however had only grinned at him satisfied and then declared he was off for a vacation with his family. The lucky bastard.

Well, Jack could certainly understand his friend's excitement and even more so now that he had a wife of his own. Even if the times he had seen his wife in the last days could be counted on one hand. If Jack had thought himself to be buried under work, then he had been in for one big surprise at seeing Carter's schedule. Since they had been back on duty it was decidedly hard for him to get any time alone with her, because there was always someone interrupting with this important problem or that. And no, it was not Danny-boy, who was almost suspiciously keeping his distance to the newlyweds. No, either it was some Tech Sergeant who'd been sent to retrieve Carter because this technology or that was acting up. Or it was some nameless scientist who needed her expertise on some running experiment. Or it was someone calling her from the outside, from various Pentagon lackeys to Area 51 scientists to some NID representatives that were in dire need of Major Carter's profound opinion for this or that. But most of the time it was Dr. McKay, who would come and take her away from him, because they were still working on getting the security systems back on track, now redoing all the work McKay had done to shut Jack and Sam out of the system.

Really, Jack realized, since they had come back neither he nor Sam had yet left the base.

Given Jack wasn't really looking forward to driving back to his home and see what the leftovers in the fridge had turned into after the half year he'd been gone, but he had to admit the silence and unattainability of his own home sounded pretty good the more time passed. Jack loved the bustling of the base and the feeling to be back, but he would have also loved a bit of quiet time with his wife. Since they had returned to duty, he could count the minutes he'd had her to himself all alone on two hands. They usually only saw the other in passing, when they would bump into each other in the corridors, or at the coffee machine, or when they sat together in briefings. Still, the smile he usually saw overtaking her face when he would sit down next to her at the briefing table or let her go first at the coffee machine or the little gestures they shared while trying to be inconspicuous about it, like her grabbing his hand under the briefing table or a quick kiss they would share before they would part at their private quarters, kept Jack going. Well, it also helped that whenever he felt he was about to combust from Carter-deprivation he could just seek her out and drag her off to grab something to eat at the commissary.

Still, Jack was aware they hadn't really gotten any further. They hadn't really had any possibility yet to discuss their living arrangements or their wedding, but, according to Daniel, Sam had apparently started to carry around a folder in which she tended to scribble things. Jack didn't think that very unusual or important, but Daniel attached quite a meaning to it, seeing that she had seemingly started discussing the wedding with Daniel. Well, at least, Jack thought, she hadn't already forgotten about it due to all the important problems she had gotten swarmed with. And she was at least talking with someone about it. Just not with Jack. But that was probably due to the fact that they weren't seeing each other that much right now and still had to be careful to not give their change in relationship away.

The armory's door behind Jack swished open and turning, the Colonel saw Daniel and Teal'c stride in.

"Jack," Daniel said surprised before shooting a confused gaze at his wristwatch. It was a new one, a gift from Jack.

"You're… early," Daniel noticed.

"Yeah," Jack agreed but decided to leave it at that. He didn't really want to admit to anyone, least of all himself, how nervous this certain, first mission was making him.

And, apparently, it also wasn't needed, he thought upon seeing Daniel's understanding gaze. The archaeologist came to stand by his side and habitually grabbed a personal defense weapon to attach it to his utility vest. Jack followed his movements with his eyes, observing how comfortable the linguist had grown with weapons over the years.

Teal'c grabbed his staff weapon and turned towards Jack. "I believe it is time, O'Neill," he declared.

Jack nodded. "Anyone seen Carter?" he asked.

Daniel and Teal'c looked at him, rather nonplussed.

"What?" Jack grouched, feeling somewhat defensive. "It's not as if we're suddenly attached at the hip!"

"Well, last I've seen her she was working with Rodney at something in the control room," Daniel informed him.

Jack almost groaned. Great. Then he was sure Carter had lost track of time, again.

"I'll go get her," he said and leaving his teammates back, Jack lightly jogged for the control room.

The moment Jack stepped into the control room he felt his eyes almost routinely single her out. Even though there wasn't much of her to be seen in the first place. She was lying under one of the controlling computers, only her hips, her legs and feet visible while McKay crouched in front of her, talking to her legs.

"No, no, no, no, Sam!" McKay said just then and Jack almost scowled. Why did the man still insist he was allowed to call her by her first name?

"No," McKay went on. "No, what I meant, was–"

There was an exasperated sigh from under the computer. "Rodney, I know what you meant," Carter's voice answered, slightly muffled.

Jack stopped a little behind the two distracted scientists. Oh, Rodney it was now? Jack tried not to feel ticked off by that. Since when were they on first name basis?

McKay began motioning with his hands in the air, although Carter couldn't see it anyways. "Okay, maybe you do know, but you don't understand–!"

"McKay, I have built these systems! There's no one who understands better!" Carter snapped and Jack almost snickered at the irritation in her voice.

"Yeah, but–!" the other ingenious scientist insisted when Jack felt he about had it now. He cleared his throat loudly.

McKay looked up, apparently surprised and annoyed at the same time someone dared to interrupt their conversation. "Colonel O'Neill," he said astonished as if Jack was the last man he would have expected.

Carter twitched self-consciously and then a dull thud sounded out. Jack almost winced while McKay turned back to where Carter's legs were. Rather hastily she emerged, rubbing her head. "Sir!" she acknowledged his presence breathlessly before turning an endearing shade of red. "What time is it?"

"About time to depart," Jack answered.

She cursed softly and was on her feet immediately. "I'm so sorry, sir!" she said. "I just wanted to help Dr. McKay and then I…"

"Forgot the time?" he finished when she trailed off embarrassed.

"Yes sir," she whispered.

Jack pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to McKay. "McKay!" he barked.

"Yes?" the Doctor asked back rather unimpressed.

"Can you finish that alone?" Jack inquired while pointing towards the controlling computer which had a few cables hanging down onto the concrete ground.

"Who do you think I am?" McKay asked self-righteous.

Jack opened his mouth to answer with a few well-chosen words when Carter interrupted sharply: "Sir!"

Then she turned towards McKay with a taxing stare and the scientist caved. "Yeah, I can fix that alone," he said towards Jack.

Jack didn't even take the time to acknowledge that answer. "Then go gear up, Carter," he ordered.

She nodded and turned to head towards the armory, Jack right behind her, when McKay murmured under his breath: "Neanderthal…"

Jack twitched but managed to suppress the urge to turn back around and pack a bunch on the impertinent scientist. Carter shot him an apologetic and grateful glance that almost consoled Jack.

"How long's he stayin' again?" Jack growled.

"He will leave in a few weeks," Carter soothed.

It couldn't be too fast, Jack decided inwardly while walking towards the blast doors of the 'Gate room when Carter hurried off towards the armory. Well, at least they would be off-world for a while…

In the 'Gate room Daniel and Teal'c were already waiting. When Jack all but stormed in, Daniel raised a brow.

"What took you so long?" he asked while gazing around Jack. "And where's Sam?"

"She's getting geared up," Jack replied and rolling his eyes, he said: "We had to get rid of McKay first."

Daniel winced sympathetically. "Did he ask Sam out again?" he inquired.

Jack's head snapped around, his eyes boring into Daniel. "What?" he all but snapped at his friend.

Daniel paled. "Ah, I take it, Sam didn't say a thing about that…?"

"No, she didn't!" Jack growled.

"Whoops," Daniel commented.

"Ya think?" Jack grumbled under his breath.

Sam chose this exact moment to jog into the 'Gate room. "Ready to embark, sir," she reported, slightly out of breath.

"Great," Jack stated sarcastically before he signaled up to Sergeant Harriman that they were ready to go. Jack heard the man page the General through the PA system and sulking, he waited.

Sam stepped up to him, her gaze curious and confused. "Is everything alright?" she asked quietly.

Jack turned towards her and reached out to adjust the strap of her P90. Sam let him prevail. "Is McKay bothering you?" he asked back just as quietly.

Sam looked at him astonished, but then he saw understanding dawn on her face. "Did Daniel say something?"

Jack couldn't help the accusing tinge his voice had when he replied: "He thought I knew."

Sam smiled at him encouragingly. "I didn't say anything, because it isn't a problem," she explained. "I told him I'm in a relationship."

Jack let go of her and grinned. "Really?"

"Nothing but the truth," she answered confidently.

"How did he take it?" Jack wanted to know, all but rubbing his hands in glee.

"Sir…" she admonished exasperated.

"SG-1, you have a go," General Hammond's voice suddenly boomed through the 'Gate room, effectively interrupting their conversation. Jack turned and waved when the General continued: "Good luck and Godspeed!"

Simultaneously, Sergeant Harriman dialed up the planet SG-1's first mission was to go to, the chevrons locking one after the other until the wormhole kawooshed to life.

"Alright then, kids!" Jack said while adjusting the cap on his head. "Let's move out!"

Daniel grinned widely and with Teal'c hot on his heels, the archaeologist strode up the ramp to the waiting event horizon. Jack waited for Sam to pass him and then followed her up the ramp. Daniel and Teal'c stepped through the engaged wormhole and Jack watched Sam confidently make her way towards the glittering event horizon. The sight of her all geared up in her complete BDUs off on another mission with SG-1 was as familiar as exciting and Jack felt another grin tug at his lips. That was happening quite frequently these days.

Sam walked into the wormhole and blinked out of their universe, and routinely, Jack followed his wife. His wife. Take that, McKay.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"First easy mission, my ass," Jack growled while kicking a small innocent rock that had the misfortune of having laid in his way.

From a little bit further up the road they were travelling, Daniel turned and walking backwards, he looked at Jack. "What's your problem? This is easy."

"Maybe for you," Jack pouted. They had all no idea what he would have to go through! Now that the SGC and the thought of an annoying scientist were far, far away and their mission was drawing closer and closer, Jack felt his nervousness return.

"Oh, come on," Daniel cajoled. "Aren't you happy?"

"About what?" Jack asked.

"Getting to gate-travel with SG-1 again," Daniel explained.

Jack shot him a quick glance and saw the archaeologist turn in a slow circle, sucking in the alien air of the planet they were visiting. At least Daniel was fully enjoying himself. Jack walked up to him and routinely, he let his eyes roam over his team. Since he was bringing up the rear, he had a good view on them all. Ignoring Daniel's antics for a while, Jack concentrated on Sam and Teal'c, who were walking at the front. His wife – wasn't it just good to be able to call her that? – was speed-talking to Teal'c about something or the other the Jaffa seemed to be only half-listening to, but he watched her enthusiasm raptly with a small, understanding smile. Jack felt a similar smile tug at the corners of his mouth while he observed Sam's hands flying around her. She only rarely did that to emphasize her point and it usually spoke of her excitement. He knew she was looking forward to this mission and that was what was ultimately placating Jack. No matter how uncomfortable he was – or would be – as long as she wanted to be here, he'd go through with it.

"Yeah, it's nice to be back," Jack admitted to Daniel, who had taken to walk beside him. And it really was, but… "But why did it have to be this mission…?"

"Oh, please, it isn't that bad," Daniel tried to comfort him.

"Yeah, because you're not the one who's going to have to go through this," Jack snorted.

"Yep," Daniel agreed, grinning widely. "And I don't envy you, either."

"Thank you. You're a real friend," Jack said sarcastically.

"Sir," Jack heard her voice cut in and looked up. Sam had stopped and waited for him to catch up, Teal'c standing at her side.

Automatically, Jack felt himself smile at her. It was a reaction he nowadays constantly showed to her, no matter where they were or what she was calling him. At their job, they were completely professional and always stayed at the demanded distance, since officially they were in no relationship whatsoever, but still Jack made sure that from time to time he would show her with little gestures what she meant to him.

"Is everything okay?" Sam asked lowly, her intelligent eyes scanning his face.

Jack barely suppressed a sigh and from the corner of his eyes he saw that Daniel and Teal'c let themselves fall back so Jack and Sam could talk.

"I told you, you didn't have to do this with me," she repeated.

He knew she was only thinking of his best interests but to hell with that!

"Carter!" he snapped. "I'm not going to let you do this alone! We're going to do this together. Aside from that, SG-1's my team and none of you is going anywhere without me."

She didn't comment his little outburst, even though Jack himself noticed the flaws in his logic. SG-1 was in no way his property or anything like that. They could very well go on a mission without him. Carter certainly had the rank and the experience to lead them. Or they could go with the backup of another SG team. They had done this before in various constellations. However, this was something… personal and no matter how much he wished he could be anywhere else, Jack wanted to be present. How fucked up was that?

"It's just… I'm nervous," he admitted to her.

"That's understandable," she said. "I'm nervous, too."

He raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Why are you nervous?"

Carter actually began to fidget with her hands. Oh, she was so picking up his bad habits!

"Because, you know… this is something big…" she explained.

"Yeah," he agreed.

Jack swept his eyes over their all-green surroundings, wondering by the way how they were even supposed to make contact, because all he saw were wide, green meadows and, of course, trees.

"You don't have to be nervous," he reassured her.

Sam snorted. "Somehow, I feel I should be saying that to you."

"Wrong," he countered. "I have every reason to be nervous."

Sam shook her head. "I think he will be happy," she said.

Jack turned and looked at her incredulously. "You kidding me?" he asked. "I can't imagine Dad will be overly pleased to find out that I'm screwing his little girl!"

Sam frowned and then opened her mouth, undoubtedly to comment on the 'little girl' or the 'screwing', when a male voice suddenly asked from behind them: "What's that supposed to mean?"

Jack almost jumped. Almost. He was a Special Forces Colonel with a reputation to uphold, after all. Still, with his stomach sinking to somewhere around his knees, Jack turned and shot what he hoped to be an apologizing smile at Jacob. The Tok'ra was standing just behind him between two grown trees, obviously the welcoming committee of the Tok'ra they had been trying to contact. The Tok'ra had moved planets again and SG-1 had been sent to their new home world to negotiate about another sample of the symbiote poison.

"Jacob. Hi," Jack said warily, holding out his hands in a placating manner. Jacob had a downright murderous expression on his face and out of the corner of his eyes Jack saw Daniel and Teal'c speed up to come to his help should the Tok'ra decide to lose it.

"Um, that didn't come out quite right…" Jack tried to explain while keeping a close eye on the zat at Jacob's hip. He had just been through a memorable experience with these things, no need to repeat that, thank you very much.

"Then explain it to me," Jacob snarled, obviously doing his best to not lose it with Jack. "But I suggest you are quick! My patience is wearing thin since my daughter went missing with her Commanding Officer, who had promised to look after her!"

Jack winced. He had known this would go down messy. He felt Jacob had every right to place the blame on him, because, admittedly, his ingenious solution had had a few downsides and one of them had been that they had to leave Jacob in the dark because of his connections to the SGC and Jack had already known then that Dad would take it the wrong way. Jack opened his mouth, searching for the right words, when Sam interrupted. Calmly, she walked over to stand in between the two men facing off.

"Dad, it's alright," she said. "The Colonel and I had to disappear for a while and I will explain it to you. But the Colonel kept his word to you. He took good care of me."

Jacob glared at Jack over his daughter's head. "Screwing my little girl isn't exactly what I'd call 'good care'," he snapped sarcastically.

Jack almost blushed. Coming from Jacob's mouth, it really did sound so much worse.

Sam sighed. "I didn't mean it like that," she clarified. "What I meant is he ensured I survived."

Before her dad could comment it, she continued: "We had to flee because they were after our powers, but we came back when the Goa'uld attacked the SGC and now we're back on SG-1. It all worked out."

Jacob reached out and laid his hands on Sam's shoulders. "The Goa'uld attacked Earth?" he asked concerned. "I didn't hear anything about that! What happened?"

"We'll tell you," Sam said. "But I'm sure the Tok'ra will want to know as well?"

Jacob nodded, delaying the discussion. Then his eyes went back to Jack, his gaze boring into the Colonel. "So what exactly did you do with my daughter?" he inquired pointedly.

"Yeah, y'know, long story…" Jack began, unsure where to begin.

Again, Sam cut in. "Dad, there're other reasons why we came. We need to negotiate with the Tok'ra about the symbiote poison and I wanted to ask you a favor."

Jacob still looked anything but relieved to see them, but he relented. "I'm going to bring you to the Tok'ra High Council. Follow me."

With Sam at his side, Jacob began to lead them and Jack hurried to catch up with Sam to walk on her other side. Daniel and Teal'c followed closely and again, Jack was kind of glad for their presence when Jacob shot him a scornful glance over Sam's head. He knew he was only temporarily spared. Going by the anger radiating off Jacob, the older man only just controlled himself, giving them a chance to explain. If he wouldn't be satisfied with the explanation? Then Jack thought they really had to give SG-1 over to another officer this time.

"So what favor did you want to ask, Sammie?" Jacob wanted to know while reaching out towards his daughter. Jack saw Sam grab her father's hand with a relieved smile. She had really missed him, he realized.

"I'm going to marry and I wanted to invite you," Sam said, practically beaming up at her father with joy.

Now Jacob looked thoroughly confused. "You're… what?" he asked as if he wasn't believing his own ears, anger momentarily forgotten.

"I'm going to marry," Sam repeated. "I wanted to have you at the ceremony?"

"You're engaged?" Jacob asked, completely bewildered while glancing at Jack from time to time.

Sam frowned. "No, actually, I am already married. But we have just signed the license and now we wanted to have a proper ceremony."

Jacob halted and looked at his daughter. "Sam… I don't understand," he sighed.

Sam smiled. "Dad, Jack and I have married. But we only had a small window of time to do that and now we want to marry again with a ceremony."

"You have… what?" the Tok'ra spluttered, obviously having trouble to catch on.

Sam chuckled and pulled out her dog tags for her father to see. Jack watched Jacob attentively, trying to assess the other man's mood while the Tok'ra bent forwards to take a look at the ring dangling next to Sam's worn dog tags, his eyes skimming over the inscription.

"Really?" Jacob asked, still completely confused. His gaze shot over to Jack and tentatively, the Colonel smiled back.

"No idea what she wants with me, but astonishingly she said yes," Jack tried to joke.

Jacob reached up and scratched his temple. "That is… unexpected," he finally admitted.

Yup, Jack contemplated inwardly, he'd thought something similar when he had heard of his marriage.

"We will explain everything," Sam promised.

"Yes, a little context would be really helpful here," her dad replied. Then he started walking again and pulled Sam with him by their still joined hands. Jack and the rest of the team followed immediately.

Their journey was almost peaceful with Daniel and Teal'c talking quietly behind them and Carter bringing her Dad up to date. Jack however stayed silent, trying his best to not attract too much attention to himself. He didn't really succeed with that though, he observed whenever Jacob was glancing at him with an upset gaze. Sam however would then shoot him an encouraging smile.

"So… married?" Jacob asked finally, with obviously mixed feelings, when Sam finished their tale.

Sam beamed at him so happily Jack could see Dad melt to that. "Yes!"

"Well, then… congratulations… I think," the Tok'ra said slowly, his eyes measuring Jack with an accuracy that made the Colonel slightly uncomfortable.

"Thank you, dad," Sam and Jack said simultaneously.

"So, does that mean you'll come to the wedding?" Sam inquired hopefully.

Jacob smiled, even though still slightly strained. "Of course I'll come to the wedding of my only daughter, Sammie."

Now Carter was practically radiating happiness. She was almost bouncing with excitement before she threw herself at her father to embrace him wholeheartedly. Jacob returned the hug but over Sam's head, he threw a thorough scowl Jack's way.

"Sammie seems… happy," the retired General admitted reluctantly and almost quietly to Jack. Sam's happy humming ensured she didn't hear it.

"She is," Jack nodded.

"Yes," Jacob agreed. "And you know that's the only reason I'm not breaking one of your bones, right?"

"Dad!" Sam interrupted angrily, inserting herself back into the conversation while simultaneously drawing back from her father.

Jack almost rolled his eyes. Yup, that reaction of Jacob he had actually expected. "I know, sir."

"And you know I will still break a few of your bones if you ever hurt her, right, Jack?" Jacob continued menacingly and Jack didn't doubt the other man for a second.

"Yes sir," he confirmed. Next to him, Carter looked ready to explode on her father.

"Still…" Jacob went on and Jack asked himself inwardly if there still was a threat they hadn't gone through yet. The Tok'ra looked at Jack and with honest sincerity, he said: "Thank you."

"For what?" Jack asked confused. He couldn't really see Jacob being grateful that he had married his daughter. Sometime, perhaps, but not right now.

"For bringing her back. Unharmed," Jacob clarified.

Jack looked over to Sam, who stood with her hands at her hip, still furious with her dad for being rough with her husband. Only the sight of her was enough to lift his mood and he felt himself smile back at Jacob with an equally sincere grin. Looking Carter straight into the eyes and remembering everything that had happened between them the past months, Jack answered with complete honesty: "Always."

A/N: So this is it. A long journey coming to an end.

Eight months of writing, almost a year of correcting and uploading the chapters, over 500 pages in Word and nearly 300.000 words in total, with almost sixty chapters, this story really was an eventful trip. So a huge thank-you to all readers who went with me on this journey and stuck with me and the story till the end. Another huge thanks to all reviewers who left a comment, and special thanks to those who reviewed every single chapter – you guys are the best! I really hope you liked the story and had as much fun reading as I had writing.