Now
Emma had to pull over, the events of the day running through her mind and distracting her form the traffic. Had she really come back here to see him? What did she think was going to happen? She broke his heart. She left the only home she had ever known. She was so afraid of losing it, she threw it away. This was too much. She pulled the car over and decided to walk while she processed everything that had happened.
Emma was barely paying attention to where she was going when she heard someone yelling her name.
''Emma'' yelled Elsa. At first Emma didn't seem to hear her but she got closer she could see Emma breaking out of her day dream.
Emma noticed that Elsa was coming down the street towards her with a concerned look over her face. Elsa was Anna's older sister and though it was here and Anna who were the same age, it was Emma and Elsa who had initially hit it off. Both of them had been touched by tragedy and knew what it was like to feel different.
''Elsa. It's great to see you." Emma smiled. Even with everything going on she was happy to run into an old friend.
''It's great to see you too, Emma. I never thought you'd come back here. Emma, are you okay?'' Elsa asked.
''Me? I'm fine'' Emma answered, wiping away her tears.
Elsa gave her a look that Emma recognised it straight away. It was Elsa's classic 'don't lie to me girl' expression. Emma knew even after all these years there was no fooling someone who knew her like Elsa did.
"It's just my past isn't as easy to forget or move on from as I had thought."
"Killian?"
"How did you know?"
"Anna told me how distracted you seemed yesterday and what else gets you like this? You have that same expression that you had when you two got into that fight about his new motorcycle in junior year. Besides, everyone knows'' Elsa said, patting Emma's are comfortingly.
''Everyone?''
''Everyone.'' Elsa replied.
They both laughed. They took a seat on an empty nearby park bench and their conversation fell silent. Emma felt a little better now, like her old self, and she realised that it was more than just Killian she left behind. Storybrooke had been one of the few places that Emma had been able to make friends.
''I'm sorry. I should have kept in touch'' Emma said feeling disappointed in herself.
"Don't worry about it. It's a two way street. I had your number, I could have called'' Elsa answered
''Well, let's keep in touch from now on, agreed?'' Emma asked
''Of course. And we'll still be seeing each other tomorrow at Anna's wedding.'' Elsa said. She was happy when Emma nodded in agreement. A part of her had feared that Emma would leave town before then.
They sat on that bench for a while, catching up on each other's lives. Emma had missed so much and she was going to be sure to make sure she didn't miss anything else. She knew leaving like that wasn't worth it, she was stupid to think she could leave this town in her past or that she should even want to. It was the first place that ever felt like a home.
Emma paused for a second before beginning her next interaction. She wanted to talk about Killian but she wasn't sure if she should.
''So, Killian he seems different. Did something happen?'' Emma asked
''He has been through a lot and it changed him, but he is doing better now.'' Elsa answered.
''I suppose that's my fault. I thought he wouldn't even be here when I returned. I thought he would be gone by now. He was supposed to follow his dreams'' Emma said.
''He didn't stay in town long after you left. He had already declined his acceptance to the Academy so he joined the army instead. For a long time, I hadn't heard from him much, but when he got back he was.. Different. You couldn't blame him, of course, not with what happened to his brother''
''What happened to Liam?'' Emma asked. She knew she hadn't seen him around but had thought that he was probably still deployed.
''Oh, you don't know? I'm so sorry. I don't know all the detail but there was an accident in a training exercise. They were both there when it happened. Killian had minor injuries but his brother didn't make it'' Elsa said, patting Emma's hand comfortingly
''What? I.. if I had known. I would. Oh my god, Killian'' Emma voiced cracked and tears surfaced in her eyes again.
How could this of happened, and she wasn't there for him. Liam was gone and Killian had to go through that loss without her.
''That scar above his eye.'' Emma gasped.
''Yeah''
"I didn't know. If I hadn't left maybe'' Emma trailed off looking straight ahead of her and soaking in her guilt.
''It's not your fault. These things happen. He is better now. He got back, started working at the shop, and he is happy. I think the worst part is that he never wanted to go in the first place'' said Elsa.
''I was doing what was right for him. I thought he wanted it, when we met he said it was his dream'' Emma said.
As she spoke those words out loud it finally sunk in what she had been denying to herself all these years. It was right in front of her. He had told her, she just wasn't listening, never having enough faith in the people around her or more importantly in herself.
Emma's mind once again wondered back to the past, seeing everything she had missed when she was gone. Every time she thought about her time with Killian Jones, the way he always looked at her, the way he held her. He was always so happy just to be there, to be part of her world.
''I got myself a new dream'' he had told her. That night on the beach, all this time, how could she have not realised she was all he wanted. She just couldn't want to believe it, and that lack of faith made her afraid of her love for him.
''We both know that's not true, Emma'' said Elsa relaying what Emma had just realised herself but what everyone else always seemed to know.
''You're right.'' she looked up at Elsa, tears starting to stream down her face again but now there was a small smile between her stream of tears.
Elsa leaned in and hugged Emma. They both laughed a little and pulled away
She didn't know what she was going to do or what she would say to him but she knew she had to see him before she changed her mind, before the fear crept in again and she convinced herself she couldn't believe in love.
''I've got to go'' Emma said, her resolve sticking for now. Elsa nodded, a huge grin on her face. She had been waiting for these two idiots to get it together for a long time.
Emma took off, not bothering to remember where she parked the bug. She ran through town as fast as she could, the heat getting to her as the sun beat down over the town. Emma pulled off her red jacket when it started making it harder to run, leaving it behind as she continued on. Still, her speed only increased and she could see the auto shop drawing closer. With her goal in sight, her momentum increased. Emma ran into the garage seeing Killian working under a car.
''Killian.'' She gasped out.
''Emma?'' He responded, his voice questioning as he began to move from under the car.
She started to speak, but he beat her to it, making his way up from the floor.
''I'm sorry about before. I shouldn't have lost my temperature, I shouldn't blame you for…'' he trailed off at the sight of Emma standing before him, visibly out of breath and evidence of her crying still on her face. Killian's face filled with concern, he stopped in his tracks. He was frozen stiff.
''No, Killian I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I left, sorry I came back, sorry that I thought that I should decide what you wanted and I'm sorry I couldn't believe in our love, because I..I never stopped loving you.'' Emma finally stopped to take a breath.
It felt like she had been holding her breath since she made the decision to come over here and say how she truly felt. Having finally let it all out, it was no easier to breath.
Killian looked shocked. He took a step back, pulling his hand through his hair with anguish across his face. For one minute (the longest minute of Emma's life) Killian didn't say anything.
''You can't just come back into my life after all this time and think it's going to be okay. You broke my heart. I had to go through losing my brother alone. You left with nothing but a letter, you never answered my calls, I didn't know what happened to you.'' Killian said anger and hurt in his tone.
''I know. I was scared and stupid and afraid. I was wrong. I'm so sorry, Killian. I should have been there for you. I didn't know, if I even thought for one second'' Emma said walking over to Killian feeling the overbearing need to comfort him.
''I know, Emma. That's what makes it all so horrible'' Killian answered.
''I know it wasn't the best thing to do, coming here like this, but I didn't know what else to do. I finally realised what you and apparently everyone else have always known. You are my dream, my home and my true love'' Emma replied, getting closer to Killian until they were only an arm length apart and staring into each other's eyes.
''You've finally realised, love. It's a bit too late, though" Killian said, looking down. He flinched away from her hand when she went to touch his cheek and she moved away from him accordingly.
''I know, I just needed to say it out loud. I'm sorry. I should have come back sooner. I felt like I needed an excuse if I chickened out. I thought about you every day but it wasn't until today, that I realised you were all in, all along, you would have followed me to the end of the world, and I just wanted you to know I will follow you too'' Emma said.
He looked up at her, now a small smile on his face. Emma took a deep breath, she said all she could and if he didn't want to try again at least she knew it wasn't her fear that got in the way this time.
''Emma I can't'' Killian said after a long pause.
Emma gave him a disappointed smile.
''That's okay. I had to try'' She said, turning away from him and walking out of the auto shop. Her hopes were falling away and she didn't know what her next step should be beyond leaving the garage.
''Swan! Wait!'' Killian yelled out, running towards her.
''Yeah?'' Emma said, turning to face him. He had caught up to her and was close enough that she could feel his breath on her cheek.
''We can't go back to how we were before but maybe we can start something new. Are you still looking for a date for the wedding'' Killian asked with a familiar grin on his face. It was the first time in years that Emma had seen him look like that and it felt nice.
''Depends whose asking'' Emma said flirtingly. Her own face had a huge smile that reached her eyes on it.
''Just a devilishly handsome mechanic'' Killian answered. His handsome grin shining through in his voice.
Emma reached up, grabbing his collar and pulling him down to her. She tilted her head and drew closer to his lip. Breaking open his mouth with her own, he returned her enthusiasm, leaning in closer and putting his hand across her jaw. He caressed it slowly and passionately. Their eyes closed tight. They both knew each other so well that their kissing had a familiar rhythm. All of their passion and love was still there as it always would be. They broke away ever so slightly and smiled at each other. Their foreheads were touching and his arms were around her now, holding her tightly.
''I never stopped loving you either, Swan'' said Killian.
The next day, Emma and Killian arrived at the wedding together. It came as no surprise to the other guests that they had reunited and everything felt oddly new and yet familiar. At the ceremony Emma and Killian felt as awkward as two teenagers on a first date but with an intimacy that couldn't be matched by anything other than soul mate.
They knew they needed time to work out their relationship. Things are never as simple as movies make the out to be, but they were on their way to having a better relationship than they had ever had before. It's not that Emma's fears were gone, she doubted that they ever would be, but now they were both aware of them and refused to let them stand in their way again.
Neither had any plan to rush into things but when the wedding came to an end it had come apparent that others felt differently and Anna's aim sure had improved.
Emma caught the bouquet.