Hearts Searching for Home

Summary: Sonny left his husband, daughter and ex-boyfriend in Salem while he went to Europe to work for his uncle and to escape the confusing emotions he was facing. As more unexpected things happen in their little town, Paul and Will bond while trying to make sense of it all. Just as they begin to think they have a handle on life again, Sonny returns to Salem expecting things to be the same. How will Sonny fit into the new family dynamics? How will Sonny, Will and Paul know when their hearts are in the right place?

CHAPTER 1

Will begrudgingly kept attending his counseling appointments with Dr. Lewis after Sonny left, mostly because he needed someone to talk to. He preferred not to let his whole world know that Sonny had left and start pestering him with blame. It had been almost two weeks and so far he'd been able to make believable excuses to his grandmothers about why he wasn't out and about and Abigail was too wrapped up in her own problems to notice. Well, she noticed, but it was easy to redirect her back to thinking of herself, her misguided plans with the man she professed to love and the baby she was carrying. So far, he was off people's radar. Apparently, Paul, Adrienne and Justin weren't talking either since he even Grandma Kate was alright with the occasional phone call. She seemed a bit distracted these days, too. Grandma Marlena and John had Uncle Eric to take care of after his ex-girlfriend, Serena, was murdered in the park. The same park where Sonny had been stabbed. The same park Sonny was in because he was looking for him. But he had to admit, as uncomfortable as it was to think about all the things that went wrong in the past, he did feel better afterwards. It was like a small piece of the weight hanging on him had been lifted each week. Maybe someday he would feel free and independent again. God knew Arianna needed a more confident dad.

Arianna. She knew something wasn't right the night Sonny left. She was a smart little girl. By the third night, she wasn't able to fall asleep without seeing pictures of Sonny. So he made a scrapbook of Sonny and Ari that told a story like the one he made for Sonny the day they got engaged. Will cried while making it, but he would do anything for is daughter.

"What I don't understand," explained Will to Dr. Lewis, "is how Sonny could love and want to marry two people who are so different from each other."

"Maybe he fell in love with you because you were so different than the one he couldn't have. I doubt Sonny was lying when he told you that he had never loved anyone the way he loved you. Maybe it's not a comparison."

"That's what Sonny claims. But I don't get it."

"If the two of you are different, maybe he doesn't love you more than Paul. Maybe he loves you differently."

"Loved. Not loves."

"And you're sure of that."

"I haven't heard from him in almost two weeks. Adrienne sends me pictures for Arianna to see of him."

"So you think that means he's stopped loving you." Will only nodded. "When do you think the change started? Was it before or after Sonny found out about you and Paul?"

Homework. There was always homework when he left counseling. And he found the best time to do it was while running. He could release his angry and frustrating emotions through physical assertion while increasing endorphins to combat depressing thoughts.

Will thought back to the first time he saw Paul after Sonny left for Europe. Paul was conveniently busy with an on location photo shoot for the next two days, but he pounced when he got the chance.

"When I reminded him of Paul," Will said to himself as an answer to Dr. Lewis's question.

"Why are you here? I've had enough of your apologies, enough of your schemes and interferences and enough…"

"Interferences?" scoffed Will as he pushed his way past Paul and into his hotel room. "You've got to be kidding me. Your sense of entitlement is as strong as your arm. I'm not the interloper, Paul. You are. You have been since you got to Salem."

"You weren't even here. You were in L.A."

"Working."

"You left Sonny."

"Not forever. And what right do you have pointing fingers at me. You pushed Sonny away for your job. You made your decision four years ago."

"Holy shit!" thought Will. In Sonny's mind, I was going to choose my career. He thought I wasn't coming back because it was more important than him. I reminded him of Paul. Even if Paul hadn't been in town, that was a strong emotion of fear that never left him.

"I'm done apologizing. You've been trying to get Sonny back for months. Have you apologized for any of it? You can't just expect everything to go back to the way it was because you still love Sonny."

"I know! My God, I know. Why did it have to be you? Why did you have to be Sonny's husband? Ever since the day I found out, I've been torn between wanting Sonny back and upset at hurting you. I never meant to hurt you, Will."

A look of disbelief colored Will's face. "But you knew Sonny was married. What difference did it make who?"

"Because I convinced myself that Sonny's husband didn't matter. That his husband wasn't good enough for him. I didn't believe him when he told me he married the man he was meant to be with. I probably could have continued to deceive myself, but the thing is, I met and got to know you as just Will. Not Will, Sonny's husband."

"I'm not good enough, though. That's why I resorted to lying. But you are so willing to point out my schemes and you've had the biggest one going."

"Excuse me?"

"You've been playing the saint, pretending to step back when all you were doing was waiting for our marriage to break up. And now, now you are trying to play your game with me."

"What game do you think I'm playing, Will?"

"Pretending that you have a positive opinion of me."

"Why would I have to pretend that? Wait. Let's back up. I wasn't playing a game with Sonny. I really wanted things to work out for the two of you. I told myself that if I loved Sonny, I would want him to be happy with whoever he wanted. And eventually, I told myself that he was just a friend. And I believed it until… you called me out on it. Next thing I knew, Sonny was telling me he didn't want to use me and he was leaving for Europe."

"What?"

"We both pushed him away. Are you happy? I'm admitting I had something to do with Sonny leaving. But this is also on you."

"I've always been insecure. I've done some dumb shit through the years. I survived my stupidity, I survived Bryan and Brent, I survived Adrienne begging Sonny to leave me and I even survived Victor's thugs and threats, but it is you that is threatening my marriage."

"I'm not a threat."

Will lost it. He fell on the bed in a fit of laughter that spiraled out of control.