A/N: TO my lovely and loyal readers, please accept my tearssss as an apology for this long delay in update. No words can justify it, except for thank you! xx

He'd lifted Macey off the ground with one arm as they reached the departure lounge. She hated flying. Planes just weren't her preferred sense of transport, but he wasn't going to drive ten hours to DC, and he wasn't going to leave her behind.

"Daddy" she murmured, her eyes scanning the terminal. He looked down at her just in time to catch her eyes move toward her small round tummy. "Hungry"

He pulled out a container of sliced mango from her bag, she ate as they carried each other to their seats inside the plane. She buckled herself into hers as he pushed their bags into the compartment above. She had slept for more than ten hours last night, his daughter, which was excellent, for he hadn't slept at all and he was silently praying that she wouldn't be over-energetic today. He was actually dreading the moment she would see Zahara, those two were like fuel with fire when they were together.

"Is she yours?" a woman's voice asked from behind him, he had just finished pulling his hoodie off when he caught her taking a long look at his defined chest.

"Yes" he smiled politely at her.

"Cute" she barely looked at Macey. "My son looks about the same age"

"They're a handful aren't they?"

"An understatement."

When they were in the air, Macey reached for his phone on instinct, he was trying very hard to keep her off technology as much as possible, averting her to books, even though she only just knew some of the alphabet, and trying to entertain her with board games and outdoors. She still wanted the games on his mobile.

"But..but" the three year old stammered.

He gave her one look, and shook his head. It was impossible to refuse her, he knew that, but today he was tired, and heavily drained, so she took whatever chances he gave her.

As they landed, Macey climbed on his back, her small arms tight around his shoulders as they walked to the carousel and claimed their bags. He spotted Steve's big shoulders in the distance, he looked like a fish out of water in the middle of a crowd of tourists. Will laughed as they neared, and shook his hand firmly.

"How is she?"

Will took a mental note of the way he paused as they got into the big black SUV, the way his brows creased tensely. "I believe she's seen better days."

DC was sunny and warm when they arrived to the white house, the monument of America, the place that she had referred to as home for three years. The last time he was here, he had met Zahara. He was one of the first people outside of the house to ever hold her. He remembered it as if it was just yesterday. Everything was so clear back then, so straight and plain. He had naively believed that he could actually move on from Alicia, with his child and Samantha, waiting to be a mother and be a wife.

He couldn't believe that he actually wanted that, that he thought that was good for him.

Steve got one of the house staff to take him to Alicia, he followed her quietly, she asked him about his daughter, absorbed with her cute pigtails and pink cheeks. He was distracted when she opened a big white door, which led down a wide hallway, she pointed to the far left. "She should be in there, if not, check the library. If she's not with her daughter, she's always reading" she looked like someone Alicia would like, he thought as he watched her wink at Macey and then walk away.

As his foot moved into the doorway, Macey spotted her before he did. His daughter's cry of joy pierced the silence in the bright room. Will wasn't necessarily religious, but he did believe in something since the birth of his daughter, which was when he saw Alicia in this room, he wondered if this was what heaven looked like.

Not just because she was here, but because the intense daylight breezing into the room made her look more pale than she already was. It would have been the perfect image, if it weren't for the white walls, white furniture and white floors. He felt blinded by the awkwardness of it, by the taste of disinfectant caught in his mouth.

She sat on the white sofa, a grey blanket warming her folded legs as she drunk the sight of them into her soul.

She wore a light grey sweater, her dark curls rested on her left shoulder. He watched as Macey jumped from his arms and made a beeline for that same shoulder. "Be careful with Leesh" he warned, wincing as she basically scrambled on top of her.

Alicia seemed to have no objection at all. She held Macey longer than usual, and then directed her to Zahara's room. Alicia couldn't take her eyes off her as she watched her small body run for her sister, once she was gone, Will sat down, his movements so light that she barely felt a dip in the cushion.

"Hey" she murmured. It wasn't awkward, their exchange, but it wasn't intimate either, like the one in his office. The air in her lungs felt stressed for the unknown energy in Will's stance, for the fact that she was unsure of what he wanted to do now that he was here. Run? Love? fight?

All three options were basically a tale of her life for the past four years, since Peter announced his candidacy, since Will confessed that he was in love with her, since she realised that there was more to life than just Will, the law and self-success, since Peter literally tried to kill her just the other day…

Peter's already taken enough fight from her since she arrived home, she's not sure when the arguing is going to stop - if it ever did – but she just hopes that Will doesn't take Peter's side in this, that he doesn't force her to choose between her family and her job too.

"Are you okay?" Will asked

"Now I am"

"The kids are worried" Will said, not for the actual sentimentality of it, but for the fact that there's nothing else to say. Nothing that won't include yelling anyway.

"Grace called this morning, I told her I was fine."

"She wanted to come with us, but I told her to stay. You'll be back soon anyway."

It'll always fascinate her how he can talk so easily of her kids, like they're actually his, as if he's raised them himself. It's nothing short of overwhelming to see it, to think about it.

The fact is, her children have spent more time with him than they have with Peter and Alicia for the last four years.

"Who knows?"

"Carter.. Zach obviously… and Kalinda."

"Kalinda?"

"I had her hack into Pakistan's network after the lines in Afghanistan lost signal, I needed updates, and Eli wasn't giving me anything."

"You did what?" the inevitable shock and restlessness reminded him that he was supposed to tell her mildly. "She could… she could get arrested for that Will… how.. why…. What on earth.." she stammered.

"Relax. I made sure it was legal."

"Don't…. don't ask her to do that for you… ever."

He nodded his head, he wondered silently if he was actually intent on listening.

"You look well" he noticed

"Just a minor laceration on my forehead and a few cuts on my arm. Battle wounds" she smiled.

Battle wounds, is that how she was describing it? "I can't live like this anymore Alicia"

She reached out for his hand, brought it to her lips and kissed it, "I know… and I'm sorry."

She looked as though that was all she could say, I'm sorry. "Compromise" he whispered.

"What?"

He stood up on both feet and placed his hands in his pockets, the room was comfortable enough for him to feel free to walk around. "I think.. from the pace we are going, you and I may just get a divorce before we even get married" he tried to tease, though, his flat face told her that he didn't find this funny at all.

"Will.. please don't say that"

"What would you do if I was in your shoes? You live in constant threat, and you expect me to just go with it? You were almost accidently blown up.. I can't sleep.. I have these dreams of you getting taken and imprisoned, shot to death, blown up with our child.. Zahara could.."

"Stop"

As much as it softened her heart to know that Will thought of Zahara as his own, her heart squeezed at how wrong it felt of him to bring her into this. "Are you seriously questioning my parenting?"

"NO. I'm merely stating a fact. You put everyone around you in danger and all you can think about is the benefit it will have for the foundation. Do you ever stop to think about your own safety? Those men who sacrifice their time and energy to protect your life?"

"You don't know what goes on in my head" her eyes hissed at him.

"But I do" he sat down and took her hands from her lap. "I know you more than you know yourself. Please, help me here" with one drop, he could literally be on his knees begging her. "We deserve a life together. A healthy and stress free life"

His brown eyes were warmer than usual, with that tint of fear and love mixed together, she didn't know what to do, she didn't know what to say other than allow her mouth to part and a small tear escape her eye.

"Don't make me choose between you and my job Will. That's not fair, I would never do that to you"

"My job isn't a fucking ticking time bomb." He said resolutely.

Her entire face dropped and she gaped back, silenced under the unfamiliarity of his firm and frustrated tone. Looking at him, here, now, in her house, she realised once again that she hadn't kissed him in almost a week. She hated the realization, disgusted that they were caught in mess, again.

"I'm sorry" he told her, shaking his head, he pulled away. "It's just that I feel as though you're slipping, and you don't want to be fought for anymore."

"You didn't kiss me when you got here" she murmured, her lashes resting against her white cheeks as she looked down. "Is that how it's going to be? After everything.."

He groaned, almost rolling his eyes, he stood up and took her lips in his. She barely had a chance to prepare herself for the firm and passionate interlocking of their love. His hand rested on her waist when she moved onto his lap, she was as light as a feather and so he didn't feel her move until he had to lift his chin to catch one last kiss.

"At least I know that hasn't changed" she whispered teasingly behind his ear.

His muscles were still tense from their small argument, his breathing didn't sound normal to her ears, it was like he was suffocating just to hold her. "I'll figure something out. Compromise" she told him. Although he didn't know what that entailed, he nodded gratefully and finally relaxed into her hold.

"I have something to tell you" he said, a smile finally gracing his lips.

"Yea?"

"The other day, a real estate company came to us for representation… and I think I found the house"

"The house?" she raised her brows and tilted her head to the left, smirking so hard it took everything out of him not to kiss it away.

"Well, several houses, we have to choose the right one"

"Hmm" she hummed, "House searching. How very domesticated"

"We're like normal people"

"It's gonna be good."

"Yea" he breathed a sigh of relief. "It will be."

Hearing the nice tune of their daughter's talking in gibberish, she fell away from his lap and curled her legs up again. "Are you cold?" he asked as she pulled the blanket over herself.

"No.. just low blood pressure…" she smiled as she caught sight of the two girls run out of the bedroom. The moment Zahara spotted Will, her green eyes lit up and she raced forward, her small legs struggling to keep up.
"How's my two girl's doing?"

"Have you had dinner yet?" she asked him, watching as Macey crawled off his hold and next to her side.

"Na ah" Macey told her firmly. "hungry"

"Will have dinner soon baby, were you good for daddy when I was gone?" Usually she would have nodded confidently, but her eyes darted toward her father who sighed loudly as he sat down with Zahara clutching onto him.

"She was pretty good, she just missed you a lot."

Alicia smiled as she pulled her into her arms. "I missed you so much, I want you all the time"

"We go home?" Macey emphasized the 'we' strongly, Alicia nodded in reassurance, despite her subconscious reminding her of her fight with Peter last night. He couldn't risk another call from another intelligence agency, he was already on scarce grounds and was on a lot of pressure to have his ex-wife resign from her advocacy in charity. Somehow, he thought that trapping her here would see her to giving it all up. She laughed at him.

They had homemade pizza for dinner, to which Zahara threw herself into a fit of tears as she didn't like hers, Alicia rolled her eyes and handed her over to Will. He was so much more patient and tolerant when it came to tantrums, he never once needed to raise his voice, although, those soft eyes of his were probably the main reason their child always stopped screaming.

"Zahara tired" Macey concluded, Alicia laughed as she took her hand. "We're just gonna go for a walk" she told Will, hoping that by the time they returned she would be tired too.

"Okay" he said.

By the time they had finally gotten away, the sun had set, and there was a stunning image across the south lawn.

She's been living here for 3 years, but it's the first time she's actually seen it.

They bump into Peter just outside his office, it's certainly not intentional because she's been hoping to avoid him. she didn't think it was appropriate for him to meet Macey, not under the current circumstances anyway. What was she to say? This is the little girl who's the cause of our separation.

"This is Zahara's daddy" she introduced the two of them, watching as Macey's brows clicked into place and a smile lifted the corners of her full lips.

"Zahara's daddy" Macey repeated.

"Yep! That's right, and you must be Macey. Zahara says your name more than ten times a day." He teased. He's so good with children, always has been, even with one that was fathered by a man he's despised half his life.

Macey doesn't know what he was saying, she doesn't fully understand yet, but her mind is so unbelievably smart for a three year old, that she catches onto him quickly.

"Zach and Grace" she said clearly.

"That's right baby, this is Zach and Gracie's dad too"

"She knows them?" Peter asked confused, until he remembered – "Of course, the firm." He shook his head and gestured toward his office.

"Can we talk please?"

"Talk or yell?"

"Just talk. I think it's time we negotiate… Macey, I bet you haven't been in the oval office yet huh?"

Alicia smiled down at her, allowing her hands to thread through those perfect curls.

"You know Peter, it's her bedtime soon and…"

"It'll only take five minutes Alicia."

She sighed, and nodded her head. Macey's tiny hand refused to leave Alicia's as her eyes took in his office. She's never really cared for this space, Alicia, she'd always thought it was just a room, but seeing Macey take it all in was like seeing it all for the first time again.

They sat down on the couch, Macey settled comfortably on her lap, her hand covering Alicia's. Through some strange, maternal connection, Macey could sense her inner turmoil. It was the best kind of medicine to know that their connection wasn't just a myth.

"The doctor said you're doing fine"

"Yes, never know what a few minor cuts can do to me"

"It could've been a lot worse"

"Peter.." she swallowed and closed her eyes.

Macey's legs swing back and forth over her knees as she toys with a booklet.

"Sorry… So um.. the reason I called you in here, I talked to the head of the USSS and after careful consideration, they think it's best you don't fly for the next month."

"Fly anywhere?"

"Yes"

She looked down at Macey, just as her brown eyes lifted to meet hers. "Looks like I can't come home with you and daddy sweet girl"

"NO!" she cried loudly, hiding her face in the palm of her hands, she whimpered, with rushed hands, she tried to wipe her tears away, to look stronger than any other three year old in the world. Even though she looked as though she was about to throw a tantrum, she slipped from Alicia's hold. "But.. but you promised!"

"I know.. but it's not safe for me.."

"You never gon stay" she told her, rather sternly for a child whose cheeks were stained with tears. "You never gon stay. You lied"

"Mace..."

"I want daddy" she whimpered quietly..

Growing angry at the man who had caused all of this, she glared viciously at her ex-husband, throwing one of her own tantrums through cold eyes. "Peter, look what you're doing.."

"I can talk to domestic security, and the intelligence agency but…. Alicia you have to cooperate. You have to listen, when my agents tell you to do something, you do it, I'm tired of hearing complaints. My polling's are low since we announced the separation.." he looked down at Macey for the fifth time in the span of a few breaths, he was anxious to know that other ears were engaged among classified discussion, even though those ears were small and barely understood normal talk.

"The last thing I need is another misinterpretation of me in the press, do you know what the times are saying? They think I'm not doing enough to protect you!" he whispered in contempt, running a hand through his hair. She knew it wasn't true, that the times were financially struggling post email scandal, still, it wasn't a pleasant feeling to know that he was being slaughtered at the expense of her foolishness.

"I will listen, and I will do whatever it is to get you in office again. Just tell me that I can go."

With something that resembled to a defeated sigh, he said "fine". His gaze pointedly avoiding that of Macey's teared ones.

It wasn't long before he was distracted with a call, and so she picked her daughter up and headed for their living space.

"I'm so sorry for making you cry baby" she told her

Macey patted her shoulder and fixed herself with a smile that Alicia saw closely to cunning. "I always get big people to listen when I cry"

She gaped slightly at the smaller version of Will, and laughed. "You had that planned all along didn't you?"

Macey just shrugged her tiny shoulders, not entirely understanding, and not entirely conscious. Alicia could see that her eyes were exhausted, pale below, but not enough to be concerned about. She rested her head against her chest and allowed her breathing to relax, Alicia was only contemplating whether or not they had enough time to change her into her pyjamas when she walked in on Will and Zahara spread against the couch. Her daughter had abundantly stolen her soul mate by this point, she could see it in his eyes, or the way he stroked her hair back as she slowly fell into unconsciousness.

"Well look at you two" Alicia fussed, "How romantic"

"Twenty minutes of full on weeping"

"She's not normally like this" Alicia breathed. "I don't know what's wrong with her"

"She's only tired" he defended her, like the good and easily persuaded father that he was.

/

They finally got to bed, this had been her room for six months now. Peter slept downstairs in the main residential area, leaving her and Zahara to keep the apartment above. She rolled on her stomach, the moonlight relaxed calmly on Will's skin and she savoured the sight. It still took her a long time to realize that this man was hers to keep, that he was here, really here. She stretched a hand out to touch his stubble, to make sure that he was real.

"Do you want to make love?" she asked him.

His eyes rested on the ceiling, turning to stare at her in the husk of twilight, his lips raised to a cautious smile and he reached out to stroke her lips with his thumb.

"Do you?"

She laughed quietly. "Always the gentlemen, you are"

He didn't laugh, but he smiled, which was something. His gaze returned to the ceiling, eyes denying an opportunity to sleep even though his obvious exhaustion said otherwise.

"We met here for the first time, almost thirty years" she remembered, so, so long ago, and if anyone had told her then that in a few decades she would be the first lady of America to Peter Florrick, with a blazing love affair with Will Gardner and his child, she would have laughed. She would have really laughed.

"I know" he murmured, "You were so different back then" his eyes glistened with memories

"You were too"

"Yes, but I still have some of the same qualities, like the drive to win no matter what, or to practice selfishness before selflessness, but you. If it weren't for those crazy eyes, I probably wouldn't notice you if you walked past me on the street."

"I don't know whether to be flattered or offended" she said

"It's a good thing" he told her "You used to be so forgiving.. back then.. fragile.. I was always afraid I'd break you"

"So" she whispered "I'm hard now?"

He shook his head "No… just, more discriminating, more wise I think."

"Now, I really am offended" she teased.

"I don't know what I'd do if I lost that kind of… certainty in my life, lost your sensibleness or stubbornness. The thought of it makes me sick"

"Will…"

He finally closed the big space between them and pulled her by the waist, he pressed a gentle kiss to her warm forehead. "Let's just go to sleep okay?"

"We should talk about this"

His eyes swore his frustration and anger, but his love was stronger than that. She felt uncomfortable knowing that he was angry at her.

She told him. "I'd give everything in this world just to be normal.. to walk down the street, to randomly decide on going to Georgetown tomorrow, or to take the girls to the park. And to go overseas without being a walking threat to every city I visit. I'm sorry Will.. I really am, but you knew what the package was when it was given to you.. You can't just suddenly decide to be mad at me because one of them isn't fair anymore"

"Yes" he agreed "But I shouldn't have to worry about whether I'm going to see you again when you walk out the door."