A/N another attempt of mine to pick Riff's brain. This chapter deals with Riff from 5-13, expect more of them later on, I'm going to do straight through ROTOQ. Anyways, this is what I've got so far. Do forgive if the earlier entries aren't exactly um, childish. I've never tried writing from a little kid's perspective. But do enjoy!!

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Private Diary of Riff Raff age 5-KEEP OUT

March 25

Mom gave me this to write in because she said it'd keep me out of her hair. Mom doesn't like it when I'm bothering her. Especially not now with the baby on the way. I'm going to be a big brother soon, I can't wait! Daddy doesn't seem so happy about it, but I love it. The baby must love it too, it isn't even here and it already has a bunch of gifts waiting for it. Everyone wants to give the baby a gift, I don't know why, it can't enjoy them. But I've been getting a lot of attention too. I'm going to be the bestest big brother in the whole galaxy.

April 15

The baby's here! I don't know what all the fuss was about, it's so small. It's a little girl, mommy named her Magenta. She already looks a lot like mom, with a few curls of red hair, and nothing like me and daddy. We both have blond hair and are skinny, she's fat. But I'm already doing a good job of being a big brother. Even mommy and the nurse said so.

April 20

I hate being a big brother. All the baby does is cry, and make a mess. And mommy and daddy make me do everything because they're so busy helping at the castle. I tried playing with her, but she wouldn't. I wanna take her back and get a dog. At least you can play with a dog.

September 8

I started school today! It was lots of fun. Except for one boy, Frankie. Frankie bossed us all around. I can't wait for Genta to be old enough to teach anything. At least she doesn't cry all the time no more. Now all she does is sleep. I don't know why all the grown ups fuss over her though, she can't do anything.

October 30

It's my birthday! I'm now 6 years old! I got lots of stuff that I wanted, like a toy laser. All the kids in school are going to be jealous now, they all want one too. I can't wait, school isn't as bad as everyone says. But I get things more than the other kids, I finish stuff before them. None of them like me. They all like Frankie. At least Genta likes me. She falls right asleep when I hold her. She doesn't do that for mom or dad.

December 30

Two days left til New Years. Mom and Dad have been fighting a lot. I can hear them from my room. They never scream at each other, not when Genta's asleep, they don't wanna wake her up. But tonite, daddy hit mom. He was drunk again, and he kept staggering around. He only started going to the bar recently. I miss how he used to be. He used to pull me up on his lap, and tell me stories. He doesn't do that anymore.

February 26

Mom and dad had another fight. Now they fight almost daily, and they don't care whether or not they wake Genta up or not. She's starting to walk now, but I don't think they noticed.  What happened to them? I'm the only one who notices anything anymore. And all the kids in school don't like me. At least Genta likes me.

April 15

Its Genta's birthday, and all mom and dad did to celebrate it was fight. I hate them. Good thing Genta's too young to notice. I guess I really am the best big brother out there. At least the best big brother on Transsexual……ooo, Genta said her first word. Guess what? It was my name. She didn't even say mom or dad first, she said my name.

July 8

Dad's gone. He just walked out. Mom's upset. I don't know what to do, or if he'll come back or not. Genta's now running, and can sorta speak. She clings to me now, she'll grab hold of my leg and won't let go. Mom thinks it's cute, but I don't think so.

July 15

Daddy's still not back. Mom's been working late. I've had to take care of Genta all by myself.

October 30

I stayed up late all night til my birthday, and mom didn't even care. Ever since dad left she hasn't been herself. And dad changed when Genta was born. I hate Genta, she started all of this. If it wasn't for her, things would still be all right.

January 20

Frankie beat me up today. He was mad because I built a better castle out of blocks than he did. He hates it when someone's better than him at anything. And I hate Frankie. He's mean and too perfect.

March 25

It's hard to believe that  I started writing in this two years ago. I hardly filled up anything. I don't write much. I like to think more than I like to write. Thinking's better, it doesn't hurt your hand when you think for long while. When you write a lot, it hurts.

April 15

Genta's 2. Mom didn't even buy her a gift. Mom barely even pays attention to us. I got her a gift though. I got her a coloring book and crayons. She loves it. She can't draw good yet. But maybe once she goes to school she'll learn how. She already can talk good.

December 19

I haven't written in a long while. I've been too busy trying to take care of Genta that I didn't even write something for my birthday. I didn't get anything anyways. Nothing happened.  I'm eight years old, and no one even noticed. Everyone at school is too busy trying to be nice to Frank to like me. I hate Frank. If I could, I'd pull out every one of those perfect black hairs on his head. Anything, just to stop the people from liking him.

April 15

Geez, I have to write more, I've been thinking so much. Ms. Yolanda at school said that writing things down helps you figure things out. I hope she's right. I hope that if I write things down I can fix everything. I want things to be better, between me and mom and Genta, who's now 3. Again, I was the only one who got her a gift. She waits for me when I come home. Mom can't take her to work, and we can't afford daycare. I miss the old days.

June 8

I swore last time that I was gonna write more, but I haven't. It's too hard to find spare time to write. And I'm so afraid of someone finding this, that I don' t wanna write anything personal. I don't want the kids in school to think I'm even weirder than I already act. Sure, a few other kids keep a journal, but I doubt they write what I do.

July 25

Now that school's out, I have a bit more time to write. But Genta's also been bugging me to play with her. I do all the time, but she doesn't care, she wants my attention all the time. Mom's picked up a nightshift now too. She's never home. She'll leave some money out for me to run out and get groceries. At least Genta isn't a picky eater.

July 30

Mom wasn't home yesterday and just got home now, it's almost midnight. It's almost tomorrow! I stayed up all night yesterday waiting for her, and stayed up til now. I'm writing this under my covers with a flashlight, I don't want her to find out. She's been real angry and upset about everything. I don't want to make her mad.

August  31

Genta's taken to sleeping in my bed with me. Since mom hasn't gotten her a real bed, she used to sleep on a cot. Well, now she shares my bed. I suppose it's cute, she curls up with her back to me and falls asleep sucking her thumb. I keep telling her not to, that it'll push out her front teeth, but she keeps doing it anyways. She just seems so vulnerable, she's only three.

October 30

My birthday, again. I hate my birthday, it reminds me of when daddy was still here, and mom only worked a little bit. I hate them. I hate everyone. I hate mom, I hate dad, I hate Frankie, and I even hate Genta. But she's so innocent. She looks up at me with those dark eyes of hers and asks me to read her a story, and I just can't resist. I can't tell a story like dad could, but I try. I set her in my lap just like dad used to with me, and I'll tell her whatever she wants to here. She started school this year. At least she's making friends.

December 20

The house feels so empty. Genta's down the street playing with one of her new friends, and mom's working. I'm here all alone. Maybe now I have some time to write. I hate all of this. I wish I never was born. Then maybe mom and dad would still be together.  Maybe then Genta could grow up with a normal family. But mom and dad aren't together. I'm the only one who watches out for Genta, I'm the one who helps her with her homework. Well, not like she has any. Count to 10, say the alphabet. Easy stuff.

April 15

Genta's birthday again. I got her a ribbon for her hair, it's always so untidy. It's all curly and frizzy. Like Frankie's. Frankie is mean though, he hogs everything, and he makes fun of me. And he's friends with everyone, they all look up to him. I hate him, I despise him. I want to kill him, maybe then I  might have some friends. But mom says I have to like him because he's the prince, and his mom's the queen, and she works for the queen. I hate the queen, she steals my mom away because my mom has to work all of the time.

May 27

I can barely move. Frankie got everyone to beat me up on the playground after school today. The teachers didn't even care. Not even Ms. Yolanda, who liked me last year. I hate Frankie so much. He doesn't even play with the boys and they all like him. He always plays with the girls, and does makeup. He says he can cause he's royalty. He says he can boss us all around because its practice, cause when he's king, he can make anyone on the planet do whatever he wants. Well, I wish I was prince, or king, then I could make mom give me and Genta gifts for our birthdays, and I could make dad come back.

September 10

Genta's so lucky, I hate her. She has friends, she's popular. I hate her. She was why mom and dad broke up. If she was never born, mom and dad would still be together, and I'd still be getting presents, and I'd have friends cause I'd be just like everyone else, with a mom, and a dad, and a nice warm home to come to after school. Not this place which is almost falling down, and cold. But Genta's the only thing I have. She looks up to me so much. She'll do whatever I say.

October 30

Four entries since last year. And as usual, one on Genta's birthday. And of course, now one on my birthday. I hardly write in this thing. But yet, it's become almost habit to write something on Genta and my birthday. Genta wished me Happy Birthday, but that's the only gift I got. I just noticed how cut off all my entries are. Its cause I'll start writing, and then get called away to do something, I've never gotten to finish what I started. I hate not having any time, like all the other kids have. I barely get my homework done, when I do. At least I still get good grades.  Though I don't think anyone would notice otherwise. Genta's doing ok in school too, but then again, she has her 10 year old brother to help her.

November 9

I got in trouble today for something I didn't even do! Frankie went to beat me up, and I ducked, and punched him instead. Well he started having a fit, and next thing I know, I'm in detention. I hate him. I wish I could've gotten more than that one swing in. he's too perfect, too wonderful, everyone looks up to him, but is it with respect, or fear? I'm not the only person he beats up, but I'm always the common victim. I'm the easy target. And  I hate him and his little gang for thinking that I'm so easy to beat up on. He'll learn, someday. Someday I'll show him.

December 10

Mom's been gone again, so I've had to watch Genta. I don't mind it that much, but yet, I hate it.  I hate being the only one in charge of stuff at home. Mom's gone more and more now. She'll disappear for days at a time.  Which means I'm stuck taking care of Genta all by myself. I have to cook, walk her to school, and everything, all by myself. I hate having to do all that. But she's so innocent, I can't help it. She's only five years old, she doesn't know any different. She can't remember what it was like having dad around. She barely remembers having mom around all the time. She's lucky, too lucky.

January 5

Mom came home finally. But she reeked of beer, just like dad used to before he left. She can't leave though. She can't leave the two of us entirely alone. If she did, I wouldn't be able to manage. I'm almost old enough to start working at the castle, and I think I might have to.  We're short on cash, mom barely has enough to buy groceries. At least we have uniforms at school. Saves mom from having to buy too many outfits. I dunno what'll happen. I've stopped hoping that things'll get better, all I can hope is that they don't get worse. At least Genta still seems happy. She always seems happy, she always can turn a dreary thing bright. She's just like the sun, lighting everything that crosses her path.

April 15

Genta turned six today. Other than that, nothing really notable. Just the standard journal entry.

October 30

I haven't written since Genta's birthday. There's really been nothing to write about. How shitty everything is? Yeah, that's fun to write about. Tell how mom's never here anymore. Tell how Frank beats me almost every day. And I can't even do anything about it. I hate it. I hate this stupid ladder, and how I'm the bottom rung. I'm the one that everyone walks all over. But they'll all learn. I'll show them all. I'll prove to them all that I'm better than they are. Even though I may be the easy target now, I won't be later. I'll kill them all, make them learn not to mess with me.

April 15

Has it really been a year since I last wrote in this? Wow. Genta's starting to grow up. She's almost as tall as I am now. And she's almost as smart as I am. She's getting good grades, better than I am. Then again, I've also been trying to make extra money, since mom's been spending her paycheck on other things, like drugs and alcohol. She's becoming just like dad was. And I can't help wondering if she's going to leave use too. At least I'll still have Genta. I'd die before I'd give up Genta, she's always been there for me, and she always will be.

July 12

Mom's been gone her longest time yet, almost a month. I hope she comes back. I need her, Genta needs her. The house needs her.

October 30

Mom came home, then left again. She left a few bottles behind this time. I wonder if I should try one. They worked for mom, and they worked for dad. And I'm 12 now, I can handle things. Better than I could before at least. The one thing I still can't handle is how everyone picks on me. But I'll show them, one day, I'll show them all. I'll prove to everyone on this planet that they can't walk all over me.

November 10

I tried some of mom's booze. I can see why mom and dad fell into the bottle. It feels so good, you just forget about everything around you. It dulls out all the pain. And I need it, I need to forget about the pain.

April 15

Genta's eighth birthday. She's growing up so fast. She's getting beautiful too. I can't help but look at her and wonder how someone that beautiful, that perfect could wind up here? Frankie's beautiful, and perfect, and he's the prince. Genta's even more beautiful and she's stuck here. It's so unfair. If I had my chance, I'd set things straight. Genta should be in Frank's place. Genta would be a wonderful ruler, she's nice, kind, and compassionate. Not like Frankie. He's mean, cold-hearted and arrogant. Genta deserves so much more than this.

October 30

This is the last entry for this journal. It's full. What do you know, when I become a teenager too. My 13th birthday, and no one's noticed. No one I don't think ever will. Cept for Genta. I don't know why I still call her that when I write. I stopped calling her that a while ago. Yet I still write it. Some things will never change me suppose. Well, I'm down to the last line. That's it for this one.