With his eyes stinging and his heart breaking for what seemed like the thousandth time, Stiles drove away not paying attention to where he was going, but pushing on the accelerator just to get away.

He'd lost him. He had lost Scott.

He thinks of the first time he saw him in kindergarten.

How Stiles that had been kneeling on the ground playing with a plastic triceratops, doing totally faithful noises from the back of his throat to mimic the sounds made by the awesome badass herbivore dinosaurs -because back then he was all for dinosaurs and dinosaurs programs- had suddenly looked up to a chubby cheeked boy staring down at the plastic animal wide-eyed, and how in that moment he'd known even in -or because of- his four year-old mind that that little guy, with the exact duplicate of the triceratops clenched in his fist, was going to be his best friend for life.

And now it was all gone.

He'd known that it would hurt, but even so he hadn't been prepared for this. He feels like an essential part of his body had been cut away without anaesthesia. His heart throbbed and his tears were now freely descending on his cheeks.

He turned to look at the wrench, suddenly angry, it was its fault, if Scott wouldn't have found it he could've had the time to tell him what happened himself, if-

He started coughing as smoke started to come out from the dashboard making his eyes sting even more than before.

"No no no no no. C'mon!" he pulled the handbrake, "Dammit!" he hit the steering wheel and got out of the jeep.

Derek watches as smoke started to come out from the jeep in front of him and feels his body go rigid. He had stopped the car ready to dash out when he sees Stiles get out and make his way to the passenger seat to take something out.

Derek waits inside the car unsure if joining him would be okay. He ached to be near him, to offer him his comfort but maybe Stiles needed to be left alone. And if Stiles wanted Derek would do anything in his power to give.

He watched as Stiles pulled up the hood and exhaled when he saw him throw away the black case. When he heard the crash of the wrench hitting the windshield he closed his eyes and counted to ten before getting out and walking up to him.

After a while spent in silence, Derek bumps gently his shoulder to Stiles'.

"Did that make you feel better?"

Stiles exhales. "No," he shakes his head. "Not at all."

Derek didn't say anything. There wasn't anything to say, really. Derek hardly spoke on a regular basis, he certainly wasn't going to break the tradition by uttering some bullshit comfort lie like everything's going to be okay.

"Everything's going to be okay." Stiles says. "That's what people say when the world around them is going to shit." He snorts, "What bullshit's that? It's not going to be okay, the- my world is falling apart. I lost Scott, I'm probably going to lose my dad too. So, no. Nothing's going to be okay. Nothing." Stiles breathes hard through his nose and notices that his body started to shake at some point.

It was cold at this point in the season and this late at night, but he doubts that the shivers coursing through his body were caused from the drop of temperature.

Could someone get PTSD after breaking up with his best friend? Maybe not, but the other shit that happened before… Yep. Those definitely explain it.

"Stiles,"

Stiles turns to look at the werewolf. He was sitting beside him, with his back resting on the jeep, and was looking down at his hands hanging loosely on his knees.

"For what it's worth… You're not alone." Derek says turning to look at him in the eyes.

Stiles feels something crack open in his chest and suddenly he sees a boy in front a house on fire. He feels his anger, his sadness, and his loneliness. The realization that nothing would be like it was before. That no matter what he did, there was no making up to it, no doing over.

And that same boy that had been hurt and betrayed so many times until he had built an exterior of ice, the boy that Stiles knew as the loneliest man that he had ever met was telling him that he wouldn't be alone. Because Stiles would have Derek, no matter what.

But he left.

A little, ugly voice says inside his head.

What's stopping him from doing it again?

He shuts the voices by leaning in without thinking, and before he can fully grasp how it happens, he's kissing Derek on the lips.

It feels right like nothing else in his life ever did, all for a full second, before the panic starts to settle in.

Derek is obviously frozen in shock given his total lack of response. And Stiles has officially buried himself in the deepest load of shit in history.

He leans back wide-eyed. "I'm so sorry," he blurts scrabbling to get on his feet. "Oh my god." He moans hiding his face in his hands, "I'm so, so sorry,-"

"Stiles,"

"I am the worst, most pathetic human being on this planet, oh my god." He moans again in horror, still hiding his face in his hands.

"Stiles." Derek says again, sounding suspiciously like he's…smiling? He also takes a hold of Stiles' wrists forcing him into lowering his hands to his sides, "Open your eyes."

Stiles does what every mature person in his situation would have done.

He squeezes his eyes tighter and shakes his head making a noise like a dying animal.

Derek releases a puff of air that sounds again like a laugh cut off.

That finally does it. No matter what, Stiles curiosity would always win over everything.

Curiosity killed the cat? Ha- joke's on you, after everything I've been through, my cat's fuckin' immortal.

When he finally opens his eyes, he did think for a second that he was dead though.
Because Derek Hale was smiling, and if that's not an otherworldly thing right there, he doesn't know what was.

"Uh," Stiles gapes, not sure how to react in front of this peculiar turn of events.

Derek sobers up, and Stiles tries hard no to show the grief he's feeling for the loss of that rare, beautiful thing that was Derek's smile. "Did you want to do it?" Derek asked.

"Do what?" Derek raises an eyebrow, and suddenly the kiss comes back into focus again. Along with Derek's lips that now Stiles is incapable of looking away from. "Oh, right…" He feels himself flush red and forces himself to tear his eyes away turning them onto his feet. "Yeah." He finally says honestly.

He hears and feels Derek's surprised intake of air from the hold that he still has on Stiles' wrists and braces himself for the blow.

"Don't leave" Stiles blurts before he could stop himself, "Please, don't. I swear I won't do it again, just- don't lea-ve" He flinches when his voice breaks at the end.

Way to sound and look more pathetic that he already feels.

Derek lets go of his wrists and brings his hands up to cup Stiles' face and tip it upwards so that Stiles is forced to look at him. And kissed him.

It isn't anything hot or deep. Just a gentle peck on his lips, but Stiles' heart stuttered the same.

"I'm not going anywhere." Is what Derek says when he leans back from his lips. "Do you understand?"

Stiles nods licking his lips and watches Derek dropping his eyes to catch the movement. "Does- does that mean that…" he took a deep breath, "You like me?"

Derek's lips twitches, "Yeah."

Stiles mouth hung open, "Seriously? Like for real?" Derek rolls his eyes and Stiles grins, "You do! You like me!" He lets out an ecstatic short laugh and looks at Derek with shining eyes. "Do you feel like you're back in fifth grade asking your crush if they like you back?" he asks grinning maniacally. "This is surreal." He shakes his head in wonder.

"What? Me liking you?" Derek asks frowning.

Stiles cocks his head to the side and nods, "Yeah, that's totally surreal to be honest."

"No, it's not."

"Wait, are we talking like 'I like you as friend' kinda like or 'I like you I'd totally do sexy things with you' kinda like?"

Derek gives him a blank look.

"Oh, answer the damn question, sourwolf" Stiles huffs.

"I kissed you, Stiles. I think that answer the kind of like I like you." He frowns as he thought of what he just said and Stiles laughs totally guessing his confusion.

"So, it is the like number two?"

"Yes."

Stiles grins, "I want to hear you say it; 'I like you, I'd totally do sexy things with you'"

"Absolutely not."

"Oh, c'mon!"

"No."

"Not even for me? To make me smile?"

"You're already grinning like a lunatic."

"Says the one with the splitting smile on his face."

"Oh, shut up."

Stiles laughs. Burring his face in the crook of Derek's neck. He inhales deeply and relishes in the knowledge that it's allowed. That he could really do it without being afraid of inexistent consequences because Derek likes him. He feels Derek's hand on his back and Stiles fights the urge to sag in the embrace and switch off the world by dissolving himself in Derek's scent and warmth.

Reluctantly he forces himself to lean back and looks up at Derek with a small smile.

"What do we do about it?"

Derek strokes his cheek with the pad of his thumb, "Whatever you want."

Stiles' smile broadens. Normally he wouldn't waste the chance to tease him for the sappiness of what he just said, but right now he was too damn happy and feeling a sap himself, so he nods and ponders it over.

His stomach drops a little as he thought of the other parts of his life that were still in pieces or about to break.

"I have to-" he exhales. "I need to take care of the other stuff, I need to tell my dad about Donovan," He says. "I need to make things better with Scott. He's my best friend, I know he must feel as bad as I do." He grimaces as he thinks of what he's going to say next.

Derek squeezes his shoulder in a comforting gesture and Stiles smiles sadly at him.

"I need to take control of my life again before I lose myself in you."

"Okay," Derek nods. "I can work with that." He says with an encouraging small smile, "Where do we start?"

Stiles grins. Relieved that Derek had said We and had completely dismissed the idea of Stiles wanting to do this alone. He'd said that he wasn't going to leave him on his own, and he was sticking to it.
He wistfully patted the side of his jeep, "First, we call a tow car and take care of this baby."

Once the jeep had been taken care of, they grab some coffee and go to the station in Derek's Camaro.

The drive is spent in companionable silence, a shy glance thrown towards one another, once in a while.

When Derek stops in front of the station he glances towards Stiles who meets his gaze with a nervous smile. Derek squeezes his hand. You can do this.

Stiles nods and takes a deep breath steading himself.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Derek asks just as Stiles opens his door.

Stiles closes the door and looked back at him. "No," he says. "I need to do this on my own." He searched Derek's face for hurt but he just nodded and said,

"I'll be here if you need me."

Stiles looks at him with a pained expression. "I count on it." He replies and gets out of the car before he could do something stupid. Like kissing him on the nose.

Stiles had just sat on the bench in front of his father's office when everyone started to go nuts as Parrish with his eyes glowing came out from the cell. He told everyone to lower their guns and get out of his way and let him go. Surprisingly they listened to him, maybe he sounded like he knew what he was doing or maybe was the mere fact that he was the sheriff's son. Either way, he was grateful for it.

He got out of the station, hot on Parish's heels ready to jump in Derek' Camaro and follow him. But when he got outside, Derek was nowhere to be seen. He checks inside the Camaro. The doors are unlocked but the keys, after a quick inspection, aren't anywhere he'd looked.

"Shit," he mutters as he straightens and sees Parish turning the corner disappearing from his line of sight.

"Dammit Derek!" You said you'd be here.

He makes a quick decision and decides to go after Parrish and sends a text to Derek.

Parrish's on the loose. Following him. Text you with a location.

Stiles watches Parrish get in the van and swears when Derek doesn't pick up the phone.

He had been trying his number almost nonstop since he set off to follow the deputy and not once had Derek picked up. And Stiles was starting to freak out.

Something must have happened.

There was no way Derek would leave his car unlocked. And he'd said that he would wait for him.

His pulse starts to speeds up and he leans on the wall beside him to have something to anchor him. It takes him several deep breaths and repeating a mantra that sounded pityingly like it's going to be okay over and over again until he's able to somewhat stem off the rising panic.

He needs to talk to Scott. He needs his help.

"Stiles."

Perfect. Just when he thought things couldn't go any worse, Theo Raeken appears from nowhere.

Stiles turns and he grits his teeth as he watches Theo approach him with that obnoxious smirk of his. Maybe he could use him, "Parrish has the bodies, we need to tell Scott." He says starting to walk towards the pickup from which Theo just got off.

"Stiles, wait."

"Parrish got the bodies, we've got to find Scott and tell him-"

"STILES!"

Stiles closes the door that he had just opened and narrowed his eyes.

"Scott doesn't want to talk to you." Theo says and Stiles breaths hard from his nose.

"Yeah, thanks, I'm aware of that." Stiles replies, "It doesn't matter, he has to know." He reaches for the door handle again.

"Stiles, he doesn't want to talk to you." Something in Theo's tone makes him pause. "But I think Derek and your dad do…" Theo says pulling out Stiles' library card and Derek's Camaro keys with the little triskelion keychain attached to them.

Stiles' stomach drops, his pulse speeding up and suddenly he feels angrier than he did in a long time. "Where are they?"

Theo smiles his ugly smile, pleased to have the upper hand evidently, "Your dad was looking for you, he found me instead.. He found the card in the hospital… I covered for you," he says narrowing his eyes "I guess even the son of a cop makes mistakes… And Derek," he smirks. "What's the deal with you two, anyway?" Stiles takes a step towards him and Theo raises his hands in fake surrender, "Fine, sore spot, huh? It was pure luck that I found him, really… I just had to imply that something had happened to you that he was out of the car and ready to take the world," he shrugs.

"Did you hurt them?"

Theo pauses to look at him and then smiles patronisingly. Stiles had never wanted to punch someone this much in his entire life. "I've never lied about why I came to Beacon Hills." Theo says, "I'm here for a pack. I came for the banshee, the girl surrounded by death. I came for the dark Kitsune, the beta with the anger issues, I Came for Void Stiles. THAT'S the pack I WANT. Unfortunately it doesn't include Scott."

Stiles clenches his fists and decides that the fact that he hadn't included Derek on the list was a small blessing.

"Your heartbeat is rising, Stiles." Theo observes, "It's not because you're afraid, though. The Nogitsune is gone, but you still manage to get blood on your hands."

Stiles takes a step towards him, "And I'm about to get more."

"I'll tell you where your dad and Derek are" Theo smiles, "If you promise not to help Scott."

Stiles punches him square on the jaw and Theo chortles. "THERE HE IS! THAT'S Void Stiles! It felt good, didn't it?"

Stiles punches him again, this time so hard that he sends Theo on the ground.

"You didn't want to tell Scott, because he was your best friend, right? But we both know that you never needed him-" Theo taunts him and Stiles grabs him from his jumper, ready to punch him again, but then Theo says, "You hate me now, but you'll get it eventually. You can't help Scott and save your dad and Derek, Stiles. But you still have time. You still got time."

Stiles hadn't think twice once he'd made up his mind.

His father had the priority over anything.

And Scott, hopefully would be strong enough to take care of himself.

He arrives at the house where Deputy Parrish had been attacked not so long ago and hurdles into the basement where his dad and Derek should be.

As soon as he sees his dad lying on the ground in a pool of blood he feels his knees go weak and he barely manages to not fall until he's close enough to touch him.

"DAD!" he chokes as he checks for his pulse.

He dazedly calls for an ambulance and then proceeds to check where exactly he was hurt.

"Stiles,"

"Dad, don't move, tell me where you're hurt." Stiles says blinking tears.

"Shoulder," his dad manages.

Stiles immediately makes to move aside the fabric of his shirt and frowns when he sees that the wound had already been bandaged. He looks at his dad when he feels him squeeze his hand. His dad's eyes darts at a corner of the room.

"Took my pain."

Derek.

His vision swims for a second as he spots the pale body a couple of feet away from where he was sitting on the ground beside his dad.

"He okay?" his dad rasps out trying to turn to see Derek better.

"Stop, you'll hurt yourself!" Stiles cried, taking a hold on his dad to still him. "I'm going to check on him, promise you won't go anywhere."

His dad nods, "I promise, kiddo."

Stiles' vision clouds again and he feels his chest constrict as his dad gives him a small, encouraging smile.

He shuffles towards Derek in shaky legs and drops like a marionette whose strings had been cut off when he reaches his side. His body is almost entirely covered in black lines. Courtesy of the wolfsbane coursing in his veins.

"Derek," He half chokes half sobs as he touches his skin to feel for his pulse.

Derek doesn't move. He's pale and… he looks dead.

"Derek, please." Just then he feels a weak thump under his fingertips and he scrabbles to take a firm hold on Derek's head. "Derek, you're not going to die like this! I'm sorry for this, but you can punch me back if you want to." Stiles says him and slaps him with a loud smack that resonates in the almost empty room.

He's about to have another go when Derek starts coughing and rolls to his side to puke black goo.

Stiles helps him stay on his side, rubbing his back.

"You're okay." Derek says smiling, barely conscious as he looks up at Stiles. And Stiles makes another half sound between a sob and a laugh, because given their current situation, is seems like a stupid thing to say. "Your dad!" Derek exclaims, then, trying to sit up.

As on cue the paramedics arrive just then and start taking care of his dad.

"He's going to be okay thanks to you," Stiles reassures him shakily, holding Derek in his arms. "But now, I need you to take care of yourself, okay? We need to take the wolfsbane out of your system and for you to start healing.." He says, unnecessarily, but talking of what needed to be done always helped him.

Derek starts to seizure just when a paramedic lowers beside them to check on him.

Stiles has something that he can only describe as an extracorporeal experience. He sees himself, pale, dark bruises under his eyes, his hair sticking in every-which direction, his eyes impossibly wide and scared.

In all his life there were only few times that he felt this scared. Even considering these last years of high school, with all the crazy stuff happening, nothing had compared to the fear that he'd felt when he realized that he would have to go on without his mother in his life.

It came to a close near whenever his dad's life was threatened but now was different. Derek was dying and there was the possibility that his dad wouldn't turn out to be okay in the end. And Scott. Scott could be gone too for all he knew.

He would have to go on alone. His dad, Scott, and Derek gone.

Everything's going to be okay.

He repeats it over and over again in his head.

He repeats it while he watches Derek go into cardiac arrest.

Everything's going to be okay.

He repeats it when Derek's come back and the paramedics move him onto a stretcher.

Everything's going to be okay.

He repeats again in his head as he stares unseeingly at his dad's and Derek's pale faces while riding on the ambulance.

He thinks of the irony. He'd call it bullshit not even twenty-four hours ago, and now it was possibly the only thing keeping him from losing it.

And in that moment he understood why people said it.

It wasn't because it was necessarily turn into truth. But because they needed to believe that it would become true. It was so that they could keep themselves sane, the need to have hope that it would get better.

"Everything's going to be okay." He says.