This Love

Insight into Karen in 603 Home Court Advantage

Grace doesn't notice the way Karen's face falls when Leo appears. And a part of it is because she is simply oblivious but mostly it's just because of all the Botox. Karen looks at 'Grace's husband' and frowns. She knows his name, how could she not? It is all Grace talks about Lebron this, Lebron that. Or maybe it was Leo. No, she is sure it was Lebron. What does it matter anyway?

Karen's voice is a pitch higher when she keeps repeating that she "thought it was going to be just you and me", if that is even possible. And yet it is. Her hopes that Grace will send Leo away are spent in vain. While Karen may be drunk half – who is she kidding – all of the time, it never quite manages to dull the ache the unsaid words lingering at the tip of her tongue cast in her gut. So she pummels Grace's husband in the tennis match and it does make her feel better. He really is awful at it; maybe Grace won't bring him along next time.

"Why are you harpooning my husband" Grace yells her eyebrows high, her arms gesturing wildly. And Karen decides to let loose at least some of what she has been holding in.

And while she may roll her eyes and imitate childishly she can't help but smile on the inside. There are too many feelings swarming inside her. Too much hurting, too much happening, too much wanting. Wait, maybe she isn't drunk enough. Was that glass in the morning not vodka? She now has the distinct feeling that it may have been water. She can't quite remember.

And then she says it. She hates him. And in the outpour she almost says I hate him because I love you. Almost. But not quite.

Grace stares back no form of understanding dawning on her and Karen almost regrets it, but the booze might finally be kicking in. She does a little hate rant on the man who has taken the spot she has coveted for so long.

Karen Walker usually takes what she wants. She blows in and storms the place up grabbing whatever pleases her and trashing the rest. Grace is different. Grace is everything good and no matter how much she may mock her, Grace is amazing. Karen is dark and under all that cosmetic surgery and makeup and sarcasm and the inhumanly high pitched voice and the thick layer of always present alcohol she is gloomy. Maybe she isn't quite enough for the redhead. She probably isn't enough at all. Maybe that is why she never made her move.

Karen flirts with every woman she finds gorgeous and in the haze of alcohol usually surrounding her, the bar isn't set that high. She appreciates their assets and makes no effort in hiding her wants. She flirts shamelessly and hits on most things with a pulse and then some other things with none.

She likes that Grace cares about her hating the husband. She likes that Grace is finally paying her the attention she lost to those hastened nuptials. But the moment Grace threatens to spend less time with her, her entire faced crumbles. She will do anything to spend more time with Grace, even pretend to like Lebron.

Karen would sacrifice her entire world for Grace. So what if she has to down a few extra bottles a day to stand the fact that that hunk of a man is the one she goes to sleep next to at night. Karen will savor that one kiss and take it with her to her dreams.