So I'm back. I'm sorry to all of you who have PM:ed me or reviewed my other stories. I will come back to you, but life has been... well really tough for the last months... but I will come back to you all soon enough.

So this is the first part of the Appendix for this story. They will not come in any chronological order, they'll just pop up when I write them down. Still I hope you'll like it! This chapter is, for different reasons, not edited so a small warning for grammar and spelling mistakes.

Also, a huge thank you for all the love and kind words this story has received, it really warms my heart!

Appendix 1: The one of dreams and wishes

Turning around with an irritated sigh, Elsa was faced with the empty space next to her in the giant bed. Staring at it she felt her heart ache and she tried pulling the covers even tighter around her.

It didn't help.

Laying her hand on the empty spot next to her, she felt the loneliness well up inside. Normally he was always there next to her, his calm breathing giving her the peace she needed to sleep. She had always been a light sleeper, she had always slept uneasy, but for the past years that had changed. Hiccup had changed it.

Unlike her, he could fall asleep in a second and when he woke up he was immediately ready for the day. His presence next to her was always calming, helping her racing mind to relax when they went to bed. He would hold her in his arms, a warm cocoon in which she could rest without worry or fear.

But now he wasn't here, he hadn't been here for a month, and she had never needed him more.

Inside the stress and panic which had been constant within her for the past month grew stronger once more. It had been there even before he left, but she had not shared it with him. She hadn't wanted him to go but just like he had been forced to go, this time she had been forced to stay behind.

The reason he had been forced to leave was that it arisen some hardships between two tribes close to Berk. When they had they had asked him for help to settle their differences, he had never hesitated to leave and she had never told him not told him to. She had known he had to leave. After all, Hiccup had come to be known as a fantastic diplomat amongst his own people. It was a praise he deserved, but it was also something which had started to increase their already heavy burden of leading two different countries.

In fact, their workload was something that had actually started to become quite a problem. Decisions took too long to make, changes were too slow and it was hard for them to have everything under control. Having noticed the growing problem, she and Hiccup had been discussing how they would be able to ease their own burden and make everything run smoother.

Now they had finally come up with a few ideas which they thought could work well. All they had to do before putting them into action was speaking with the elders on Berk and the council in Arendelle.

It was some comfort that they soon hopefully would have a little more time to their disposal. It wasn't like they were going to have more spare time in the future if nothing changed, quite the opposite.

Feeling the slight panic rise more within, Elsa threw the covers away and put on her thin morning robe over her white nightdress. Walking over to the balcony she opened the doors and walked out into the night, taking a deep breath of fresh air.

Above her the stars were shining and she could see the first frost starting to take over the world. Autumn was turning into winter and while the last warmth still kept its hold over Arendelle, she knew winter already had the upper hand on Berk.

Thinking of her other home, she missed the simpler life with the Vikings. Though mostly she wanted to go there since she missed her husband so much her heart felt broken.

Feeling her throat thicken, she couldn't stop the tears that escaped her eyes. She didn't have any control over the sudden loneliness and painful longing that welled up inside. She wanted him by her side, she needed him by her side. She had tried acting like normal for the past month, she had fulfilled all of her duties and she had not shared with anyone the secret that was eating her up inside. She hadn't even shared it with Anna. She had wanted to, but it hadn't felt right.

She couldn't tell her sister just yet, she had to speak with Hiccup first.

The only problem was that he wasn't here.

Hugging herself as her heart ached painfully, she saw her tears fall like drops of ice.

It had been nearly three years since they confessed their feelings for each other, nearly two years since they had gotten married, and she was still falling more in love with him every day. They were growing together, helping each other when the demons that still haunted them.

Sometimes it still even scared her how much she had come to love him, how connected she felt to him. When they were togehter, the world was right. A piece of her heart, which always felt hollow when he was away, came alive and filled her with warmth. He made her feel happy, alive and hopeful. With him she was safe, she didn't have to be anyone except herself. Even when they argued, for they were both too stubborn and too head-strong not to argue at times, she no longer felt shame or fear when the air around her grew colder.

Hiccup never cared either, to him it was just another part of her he loved and accepted without question.

Together they were planning for the future, they were building new alliances and their countries were thriving. Everything should be perfect, but it wasn't. There was a dark cloud over their happiness, a heavy cloak that hung on their shoulders.

Even after nearly two years of marriage they still had no children. It was their greatest sorrow and it had now even passed so much time that rumours had started to arise both in Arendelle and on Berk. Rumors that perhaps a woman filled with ice and snow perhaps couldn't carry a child.

Even if Elsa had tried hard to ignore the whispers that said her power probably made her body a hostile home for a baby, as time passed she had still felt how they had started to get to her. Hiccup had been furious when he heard about the rumors, but he just like her knew there was little they could do.

Though what he had done was making sure she knew he didn't believe what anyone else said. He had reminded her that sometimes it just took a little more time. He had even reassured her that if they couldn't have children, he would not love her any less. He had reminded her that it didn't even have to be her, that, perhaps, it was something wrong with him. He had said that if it was, he hoped she felt the same as him and she had with a lighter heart promised him she did.

And so once again in their sorrow they had once again found peace and solace in each other. Together they had come to the place where they were happy despite their longing. A place where all they could do was hope for a baby and be happy for the sound of at least one pair of little feet running through the castle from Anna's and Kristoff's firstborn son.

They had even managed to be a part of the celebration when Eret and Brigitte carefully had told them the other pair were having a baby only a few months into their marriage. They had managed to smile and be joyful when Anna and Kristoff had told them Anna was pregnant again.

That they both of those times later at night had held each other close as they both cried silently, mourning a wish they had not been blessed with, was something they had never shared with anyone.

Still despite this shard of darkness in their joy, it had brought something good. It had made the love between them grow and the stormy, fiery, desire between them had not been quenched. Their need for each other was as strong as ever, if not even more powerful than before, and they knew that their absence of children was not from lack of trying.

Of course, in a way, that made the absence of a child even worse at the same time.

"Oh Hiccup, why can't you be here?" Elsa whispered quietly, looking out over the city and putting her hands on the cold rail. She knew it was still about a week before he would come, but she wanted him here now. She needed to talk to him. She could no longer bear all of her fears alone.

"You just stay here bud." Hiccup said to his dragon, giving Toothless a hug and only smiling when his dragon gave him a small lick on the cheek. Seeing him lay down tiredly in the nest which was now his in a part of the suite he and Elsa lived in in Arendelle, Hiccup gave his friend a last pat before leaving him alone to rest.

When Hiccup had found out he and Elsa would live alone on a whole floor in the castle alone, he had at first been unsure how to react. In the end though he had simply come to accept it was custom for royalty in Arendelle and that it was one of those things which was expected by everyone. He knew Elsa also found it all to be a bit too much as well, so on her orders a big part of the floor had been renovated so that to Toothless could live with them inside the castle if he wanted to.

Mostly though, his dragon avoided the crowded life at court as much as he could and Hiccup fully understood him. Dragons were not meant to live within stone walls, no matter how much space that was given to them inside.

Walking hastily through their home floor, Hiccup nodded kindly to one of the maids who were already up and starting the fires. The young girl blushed deeply at his acknowledgement, bowing her head down when he passed.

Neither he nor Elsa were unaware that, despite their marriage, many women and men still tried to get close to them on an intimate level. After all lovers were not uncommon in either of their cultures, but it was never something that they had argued about. They loved each other and Hiccup trusted Elsa fully and he knew she trusted him as well.

In fact they had even jokingly agreed that a small crush had never hurt anyone, both knowing that people who were trying to use them only for the positions they had in life would always exist.

Seeing the large doors leading into their bedroom, Hiccup felt a deep sense of relief and happiness at the mere thought that he would soon be with the woman he loved once more. Being parted from her always was horrible and the longing for her was always hard to bear.

They both hated it, but sometimes they had to be apart. When they had decided to try to build their lives together three years ago, they had promised each other that their responsibilities could never suffer from their relationship and it was a promise they had never broken so far.

Of course that didn't mean the separation was any easier though or that he didn't wish they never had to be parted.

Opening the doors into their room quietly, his eyes immediately wandered to the bed. When his was met with the sight of only messy covers he wasn't the slightest surprised. He knew Elsa barely slept at all when she was alone, she barely slept when he was there to hold her. The only difference was that at least then she could relax and rest. When she was alone he knew she almost always stayed awake all night.

Closing the door quietly behind him he walked silently inside, feeling the cold breeze from the balcony. Looking towards it, he stopped in the middle of the room to take in the enchanting vision before him.

The white drapes were moving softly in the breeze coming in from the ocean and out on the balcony Elsa's slivery long locks were moving softly as well. Her pale skin almost seemed to glow and her thin robe was tied around her waist, showing off her figure which was curvier than most nobles in Arendelle.

Admiring her, he felt his heart swell with the love he felt for her. It never seemed to stop growing and seeing her he once again, as he had done that night by the pond so many years ago, wondered if she was truly human. She looked unearthly where she stood looking out over her kingdom. It was almost like the night sky had actually allowed a star to fall down on earth to live with the humans.

If he hadn't known her, her troubles, her fears and her darkness, perhaps he could've believed it. But he knew her, and his wife was not perfect, which was the reason he loved her so much. Together they became something more, together they became someone better than they were on their own.

Walking across the room and out onto the balcony, Elsa didn't even turn tense up when he wrapped his arms around her. Instead she only sighed and quickly turned around in his arms, her arms wrapping firmly around his waist as she rested her head on his chest, right over his heart.

"You're home." She whispered with a thick voice, Hiccup feeling his own tears gathering in his eyes. He could sense that something was weighing her down, but he was also overwhelmed by the feeling of becoming whole once more. Of feeling how what had been missing him came back with full force.

"I am." He whispered back, kissing her head and breathing in her scent. He didn't know if she knew how true her statement truly was for home was no longer Berk; it wasn't even Arendelle.

It was her.

"Odin I've missed you." He told her, closing his eyes as he knew her ear resting over his heart was listening to his heartbeat. She had told him how it gave her solace.

"I've missed you too." She answered, pulling back a little and looking up at him with tearful eyes. "Oh God I've missed you." She said again, pulling him down to her and kissing him softly. Happily he kissed her back, feeling every worry leave him.

All that mattered for now, all that existed, was her.

"You're back early." She said when they broke the kiss, Hiccup smiling down at her.

"I could leave a bit early, but maybe you would've wanted me to wait another week?" He asked, Elsa glaring up at him and hitting him on the chest with a smile.

"Idiot!" She muttered, Hiccup chuckling as he pulled her close once more, Elsa hugging him closer as well.

Standing in the silence, he felt deeply content just having her in his arms. Though he could still sense that it was something heavy in the air, something hanging over the usual pure joy of their reunions. Then he suddenly felt how something warm was soaking his shirt and looking down he saw that tears were falling silently from Elsa's eyes.

Seeing her cry, he felt his worry for her rise within. Elsa only very rarely cried, even in front of him. That she did meant something was very wrong.

"Love, what's the matter?" He asked, Elsa looking up at him as the tears started to flow even faster down her face.

"You're here." She sobbed, Hiccup stroking her cheek lovingly while feeling slightly confused.

"I am." He told her, Elsa taking a hold of his arms and holding onto him firmly.

"I'm just so happy you're here, I missed you and I…" Being interrupted by a sob that suddenly escaped her, Hiccup felt his worry for her grow.

"Elsa has something happened? You need to tell me if it has." He told her, drying away a few of her tears even if they were just replaced by new ones.

"No, or it has but I don't know how to…" Being interrupted by a new sob, Elsa looked down and took a deep breath before looking up at him with wide insecure eyes. "Hiccup, do you think I would be a good mother?" She asked, Hiccup feeling himself a little stunned by the sudden question.

In the beginning of their marriage this had come up a few times; Elsa's fear that their child would inherit her power, her fear that she might not be able to love it fully, that she would shut it out, and her fear of maybe losing control of her power if she got angry.

As their years had passed though, and there was still no sight of children, her fears had fallen into the shadows of their sorrow. That was the reason he was now so surprised she brought it up agan, it made him wonder what had brought her old insecurities back to the surface.

"Elsa, you would be a wonderful mother. I know you would." He told her, knowing it was true. He had seen how wonderful she was with the children on Berk, but mostly with young Kristian who was Anna's and Kristoff's firstborn son. The small boy adored her, just like Rapunzel's and Eugene's twins.

Heck, even the dragons trusted her with their babies.

"How do you know?" She asked, new tears falling from her slightly panicked eyes. "I know you would be a wonderful father, but me? What if I get angry and lose control of my power? What if I hurt our child?! What if our baby inherits my power? Can I really risk cursing our child? And I still have trouble showing my emotions! What if I can't show and give our baby the love it needs?! What if…"

Placing his hand on her face and stroking it gently, Elsa looked up at him and trailed off from her stressed ranting. Looking down at her with calm and loving eyes he felt happy when he saw her relax slightly. Never breaking eye contact with her, he took her hands in his own, her cold skin still making his tingle.

On her left ring finger he felt the silver ring that showed the world she was his.

"You are the most loving person I know, the one with the biggest heart. You are protecting, strong and compassionate. That you even think about this shows that if we are ever blessed with a child you'll love it more than anything. This shows you even love and care for one that doesn't… one that doesn't yet exist. Any child we hopefully are blessed with will never doubt your love and together we can rise a child. Together we can avoid all the wrongs our parents did." He told her, Elsa's tears having finally stopped.

"And if our child inherits your power than I would see it as a blessing, not a curse. It would have you to guide it, it would have both of us. We can teach it how to control its power from the start and your power is wonderful. It would just make our child even more special." He said, Elsa giving him a week smile.

"You really think so?" She asked, Hiccup smiling down at her.

"I know so." He said, Elsa's smile growing wider and her eyes filling with warmth before she once again rested her head on his chest.

"I love you." She told him quietly, Hiccup kissing her head.

"I love you too." He said, still wondering what had brought all of this on. Before he had the chance to ask though, Elsa suddenly pulled out of their embrace slightly and began playing with his tunic with a slightly nervous expression on her face, her eyes locked on her hands.

"And you are wrong." She said quietly, taking a small breath before looking up into his wondering eyes, her ice-blue ones now glowing with a warm, excited light. "I have loved the idea of a child for years, but I no longer have to love a child that doesn't exist. We don't have to love a child that dosen't exist." She told him, Hiccup feeling his mind go blank as all he could do was stare at her with wide eyes.

He was completely frozen, his mind unable to comprehend what Elsa had just said. He even stayed frozen when a small amused smile spread over her face and she took his hands in hers, putting them on her stomach and holding them there carefully.

She couldn't be… they had nearly given up… could it really…

"You're…" He began, his throat so dry he couldn't even get the word out. His brain had stopped working completely. All he could do was stare into Elsa's ice-blue eyes which now shone even brighter.

There was hope in them.

Hope and excitement.

"You're…" He began again, his throat suddenly thick as he felt something stir deep within. Could she really be…

"I was not sure until just after you left. This is the second month I haven't bleed so I called for the nurse and she believes it too." She told him, new tears gathering in her eyes. Eyes which were glowing with happiness. "Hiccup, you're going to be a father."

At her words, some small part of his mind finally came back to life and he felt how a huge grin spread over his face. Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her fiercely and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him.

Breaking the kiss with a laugh, he hunched down and kissed her stomach, Elsa chuckling when he once again wrapped her in his arms and he hugged her close.

"We're going to have a baby? You're…" He began again, Elsa grinning up happily at him with glowing eyes when he still couldn't get the word out.

"Yes, I am. I'm pregnant." She glowed up at him, Hiccup not caring the slightest about the tears that started to fall from his eyes. He had never been happier, never had he felt such a deep joy. Despite having flown for nearly three days straight he was no longer tired.

He felt like he could take on the world.

Kissing her again, Hiccup felt Elsa was crying as well, but this time it was tears of happiness.

"You are going to be the most amazing mother, my Queen. My Elsa." He told her, feeling like the huge smile on his face could never go away. He never wanted it to.

"And you are going to be the most wonderful father, my Chief." She replied, stroking his cheek and feeling how her fears were haunted away by the love in his eyes.

Like he had said they were in this togehter. Together they could do it. They could do anything.

"Though so much will have to change now of course." She suddenly began, the words spilling out of her as she thought of everything that now would have to happen. "We really need to think about if we really shall have two ruling councils and we'll have too…"

She was interrupted by Hiccup kissing her softly, his eyes full of amusement when he pulled back and she blushed slightly from the rising tension around them.

And the promise of the electric, soft kiss.

"How about we talk about that tomorrow?" He asked her, his hands burning through her thin nightdress as they wandered over her back.

"Yes, but we should tell…"

"Yes, we should tell everyone." He interrupted her, Elsa getting lost in his green eyes. "But not tonight." He added, Elsa smiling up at him.

"No, not tonight." She agreed, wrapping her arms around his neck and rising a little on her toes so she could give him a soft kiss. "I love you." She told him, knowing the words would never be enough to fully describe her feelings.

No words would ever be enough.

"I love you too, more than you'll ever know." He answered softly, kissing her again as he lifted her up and carried her inside.

I think you all can guess that it's little Alva who is brining such joy! This chapter is, in a way, dedicated to all who have hardships having children. It's far from as easy and far from as given as I myself thought sometimes when I was younger. Now I know differently, not from personal experience, but from a couple who are two of my oldest friends. Therefore the emotions I convey in this story is only those I have experienced through others, which I think is important to point out.

Now as I said, I'll come back to all of you who have PM:ed me and reviewed. You are not forgotten, promise! I also promise there is more to come, both for this story and for my other stories!

Now, I hope you liked this little treat! Leave a review and tell me what you thought!

Until next time!

Love, Lysistrate