A/N: Thank you for the many reviews and your continued support; your kindness and patience are sincerely appreciated.

"A ship is always safe at the shore, but that is not what it is built for."

-Albert Einstein

Narcissa deepened the kiss, her hands encircling Severus' slight waist, pulling his long, lean body flush against hers. The rush of heat nearly knocked him over. His pulsed quickened, his palms grew sweaty; his body was responding as it should to the stunning woman seducing him. He forcefully pushed aside the dread and sorrow and gave himself over to the sensations washing across his tired, weary body. Her soft, red lips, her lithe body clinging to his, her eager hands grasping at him. It wasn't what he wanted but it would have to do, at least that's what he tried to tell himself. But as she began touching him in earnest, moaning against his lips, his heart thundered powerfully in his chest, painfully knocking against his ribs causing that sinking feeling to intensify rather than abate.

Pound, pound.

Her lips never leaving his, she pulled him back to the sofa and together they sat as one. She tenderly cupped his face, her cool palm delicately caressing his cheek as her mouth moved against his, her tongue licking his bottom lip, begging entry. His mouth opened, almost without thought and her soft tongue began caressing his with the most gentle of touches. She tasted as sweet as the finest elf wine.

Pound, pound.

Pulling up the flowing hem of her dress and revealing a long, pale thigh, the color of fresh cream, she slowly slipped her leg across his and settled herself in his lap. Her hands dipped and began to unbutton his shirt, her fingers nimbly making quick work of it. She soon pulled it apart, revealing his pale, taunt torso, crisscrossed with old scars; she smiled as she relished the feeling of his hot skin beneath her palms.

Pound, pound.

"Touch me," she begged, mewling like a kitten, "please, Severus."

He obeyed, slowly gliding his hands up her bare thighs, his fingers digging ever so slightly into her soft flesh, his thumbs rubbing soft circles on her tender inner thighs, achingly close to her center. His stomach lurched painfully at the look of ecstasy upon her face, so he shut his eyes tight, trying with all his might to convince himself that this was somehow right.

She moaned at the delicious sensation, quivering as she clung to him even more desperately, hungry for his touch like a starved animal. She began to rock her hips against his lap, rubbing her wet heat wantonly against his burgeoning erection.

Pound, pound.

He may have been inexperienced when it came to intimacy but even he knew this wasn't what it was supposed to feel like. As she writhed against him and sucked at his bottom lip, he could only summon one feeling: hollowness.

She was beautiful, lovely even, and had this happened twenty years prior, he was sure it would've been the stuff of pure fantasy. But now it only felt empty and cheap.

She couldn't hold a candle to Hermione, not her exquisite touch, not the way she smiled at him.

And yet this emptiness was all he had.

His eyes still shut, visions of Hermione danced before his mind's eye; the light in her eyes, the taste of her lips, the feel of her soft skin against his. He winced, tears of loathing and regret stinging his eyes, so he kissed Narcissa harder, pulling her tighter against his body, wishing with all his wretched heart to block out the pain.

She returned the ardor with equal fire, and quickly began undoing the black silk buttons lining the front of her gray frock. She pulled the garment open to reveal a black lace bra, her hardened nipples straining against the thin fabric. She grabbed his hands and held them against the aching peaks. He obliged and gave each handful a squeeze before slowly pinching each nipple to an even harder peak, eliciting a throaty moan of delicious pleasure from her.

Her hands glided slowly down his chest, moving south, and pulled his belt free from the buckle while her mouth peppered his neck and chest with hot kisses, possessing his body with greater confidence. She gently lowered his zipper, taking her sweet time as her mouth teased him apart and her hand rubbed against his throbbing member through his boxers.

"See?" she breathed, against the shell of his ear, "I told you I could make you happy," she purred, sucking his earlobe for good measure.

Pound, pound.

Her hands grew warmer from the friction as they began to slip into his boxer shorts, teasing his skin and combing through the coarse hair. Just as her hand began to wrap around his hardened length, his heart seized painfully and he nearly gasped from the searing pain. His mind snapped forcefully to attention as he struggled to breathe.

"Stop," he commanded, firmly grabbing hold of her arms and pulling her forcefully away from his body.

She sat upright in his lap, panting and staring at him with confusion, "What's wrong?" she breathed.

Every molecule of his being had been resisting this and finally his mind listened to what his heart had been trying to tell him all night.

This wasn't real, not in the least, a farce at best. This was a performance, each only half-heartedly participating and he knew he had to be the one to stop it before it was too late.

"This...this isn't what I want," he stated plainly, being completely honest and in control of his senses for the first time that whole night. "And I'm positive this isn't what you want either."

Her face seized with raw emotion at this, "I do want you...really," she tried but Severus could see her pupils constrict and her mouth quiver and knew she was lying.

He sighed, releasing her arms and shook his head, "No...you don't."

She tried valiantly to hold his gaze but found the simple act impossible. She tore her eyes from his, staring into the fire as her whole body went slack.

"You're right," she softly admitted, "I...don't."

She hung her head in her hands and began to gently weep. He leaned forward and pulled her shaking form against his strong chest and simply held her.

"I just...I don't want to live alone forever," she tearfully declared. "I don't think I can do this on my own. Lucius won't be let out for at least twenty years and by then...where will that leave us? What will become of me?" she desperately asked, sitting up to look at him with lost, mournful eyes.

"If you love him, Narcissa, then you must wait for him. Love isn't something you should just throw away," he uttered, his own voice just as soft and vulnerable as hers.

She sighed deeply and gave a slow, reluctant nodded. Roughly wiping away at her stinging tears, she pulled herself from his lap and settled heavily upon the sofa, looking completely spent.

She took a gentle hold of his hand and tearfully uttered, "I'm so sorry, Severus. Please...please forgive me, I wasn't trying to use you, I just..." she stopped, her porcelain skin growing red but Severus squeezed her hand and gave a nod of understanding.

"I know," he reassured, his pounding heart finally slowing. "Sometimes when we can't have what we want, we try, foolishly so, to make due with less."

She held his gaze a long beat before giving a small nod, her shoulders stooped as her tear-rimmed eyes gazed into the dancing flames.

"Let's get you back to your quarters," he gently offered.

She could only nod in response, smoothing her rumpled skirt and running a useless hand through her disheveled hair.

He stood, buttoning his shirt and buckling his belt before offering her a hand up and she took it. He held her upright as they walked in silence to the Slytherin common room. As the common room door swung open, Narcissa gave his hand a final squeeze, "Thank you, Severus...for everything."

As she turned away he uttered, "Open his letters...and remember the man you married."

She looked uncertain, her face red and splotchy but she didn't disagree.

He turned to leave and head back to his quarters, but she called out, "I meant what I said, Severus...try and find some happiness. You do deserve it, you know. Even if it is with some little swot of a Gryffindor," she softly smirked.

He smiled as she shut the common room door and left Severus alone in the hallway.

He leaned against the stone wall and took a deep breath, realizing how close he came to making such a profound, irrevocable mistake. He closed his eyes and put a hand to his chest, the pounding had finally stopped and he found he could suddenly think clearly. His mind filled immediately with visions of Hermione, the only woman he truly longed to touch, to kiss, to make love to. Her smile, her laugh, her lovely face, tear-stained and twisted with sorrow and ache.

He had so thoroughly convinced himself that he was alone, but that was a lie. He had her. He had happiness, and her love, at least he did before he cruelly threw her away.

Choose that happiness when it comes, Severus.

He opened his eyes and knew, finally, what he had to do. What he should've done a long time ago. He just hoped he wasn't too late.

Walking out of the dungeons at a brisk pace, he took the many stairs two at a time and began to run through the castle until he finally reached the infirmary. The door flew open as he marched in and Poppy stared at him wide-eyed, "Severus, you're alright?"

"Has Hermione returned?" he sharply asked, charging into the empty room with his eyes alight.

"How are you walking? What's happened?" she countered, staring wide-eyed at the healthy-looking man before her.

"I don't have time for your questions right now, woman! Have you seen Hermione?!" he demanded.

"Yes, she left through the floo, hours ago, with Sirius. Headed to the Leaky Cauldron."

"And she hasn't returned?"

"No," she answered, "now would you mind telling me how in the bloody hell you're up and walking!?" she demanded but Severus couldn't hear her.

Storming across the infirmary in a few paces, he hurriedly threw a handful of powder into the hearth and called out, "Leaky Cauldron!" and vanished in a whirl of bright green flames with a heart full of worry.

~~~000~~~

His kisses felt extraordinary, like lava slowly spreading through her body, winding and twisting though every inch of her, setting her body ablaze. His strong arms wrapped around her waist, their bodies lying entwined and panting, her mind could hardly catch up to the new, startling reality.

Hermione slowly rolled onto her back and laid beneath Sirius, her eyes brimming with passion.

His body pressed against hers, he smiled slightly at her, the corner of his lips quirking up into a dangerous, sexy smirk.

His fingers slowly traced her jaw, clearly relishing the feel of her soft skin beneath his fingertips. Tenderly cupping her cheek, he ghosted a thumb across her pouty lips, his gaze drifting across her face with a look of absolute wonder and overwhelming passion.

She reached up and ran her hands through his thick, lustrous curls.

He smiled at her touch, his eyes glittering with warmth and magic.

She pulled him down once again and took his soft lips, letting her mouth cover his, possessing him with equal fire.

Even in her heartbroken, half-enebriated state she knew this was wrong in a thousand different ways. He was her friend and Harry's bloody godfather! She could remember the very first time she had seen his face on his wanted poster, screaming and straining against the aurors, looking like a monster and she believed him to be one until that fateful night in the Shrieking Shack.

She might have been knackered, but she knew enough to realize she was making a piss poor choice. This was wrong, plain and simple. She should stop, she needed to stop.

But as his full lips met hers and his hands slipped to her back, grazing her bare skin where her shirt had ridden up, his long, firm body nestling atop hers with a delicious weight, all of those perfectly valid reasons seemed to slip fast and far away and for once she let them go.

Did it feel good? Merlin yes, he was talented, no doubt about it. He softly and slowly worshiped her with languorous kisses that made her ache and writhe.

It wasn't love...lust perhaps? She wasn't sure, but it certainly didn't make her feel any worse. It filled her up with desire and excitement, the anger and disappointment pushed out for a blessed moment. She felt safe and warm and wanted and damn if it didn't feel glorious.

His kiss was gentle and soft, so unlike what she would've expected. As she let her lips slip open and ran her tongue along his bottom lip, his tongue tangled with hers, the sweet taste of his mouth flooding her own. He gave a small little nip at her bottom lip that made her whole body tighten with anticipation.

He clutched her body tight, as his hands, smooth and soft, glided across her warm skin. She rolled her hips against his and moaned against his obvious excitement.

His smooth hands tangled in her hair, his kisses quickly becoming harder, possessive.

She pulled at the hem of his t-shirt until he finally leaned forward and let her pull it off.

Her hands raked down his long, lean body, delighting in the way his hot skin felt benath her palms, his skin covered in tattoos and old scars, a smattering of dark hair that disappeared into his slacks. He kissed her deeply, rolling onto his back and pulling her atop him, his hands slipping under her shirt and caressing her back. She wanted more, much more.

"Undress me," she whispered against his lips.

He smiled up at her, "You sure?"

She bit her bottom lip and nodded.

He hooked the hem of her t-shirt with his thumbs and slowly pulled it up and over her head, tossing it aside.

Laying her gently on her back, he came to a rest beside her, drinking in the singular sight of her half-naked body glowing softly in the dappled moonlight. The swell of her round breasts, her dusty pink nipples, hardened and aching to be touched. Her pale skin, the delicate curve of her hips, her flat stomach, her beautiful body writhing under his admiring gaze.

"You're so beautiful, do you know that?" he asked, his voice deep and earnest. "I don't think I've ever seen a prettier girl than you."

He was so sincere, all his usual over-the-top flirtation and swagger was gone. Only a quiet earnestness remained. Goosebumps raced across her hot skin as he stared at her with such adoration.

She blushed, running her hands up his chest, her heart racing at his words and rapturous gaze. "Touch me," she softly begged.

He bent down, first kissing her lips, then letting his mouth slowly move to her neck and chest then finally taking a pointed nipple into his hot mouth and gently sucking at the aching bud with long, slow strokes, all the while letting his strong hands glide across her scorching skin and possess every inch of her.

The sight of him half-naked atop her, his hot mouth lapping at her breast, his hands gliding along her sides, her legs, her backside, alternating between soft caresses and firm, possessive strokes made her mind to turn to absolute jelly. He had lit a fire deep within her, a blazing inferno threatening to overtake her and the heat spurred her on. The luscious, agonizing ache blossoming deep in her center demanded more.

She gently pushed him on his back as she sat up and strattled his lap, her curls cascading down her bare back, her breasts heaving from her racing heart. Smiling down at him, her fingers reached for his belt and pulled the buckle free as he lay panting beneath her, watching her with a sharp hunger in his eyes.

Her hands popped the button free and she stopped a second. Her head spun from the alcohol, the heartache and scorching heat of his body against her trembling thighs.

A small, muffled voice from deep within seemed to be screaming at her to pull back and slow down. But a much louder, far more forceful voice, was telling her to steam ahead.

Never looking away from his mahogany eyes, she slowly unzipped his slacks and slipped her small hand into his boxers and felt her breath catch sharply as her fingers combed through his coarse hair and then she felt his throbbing cock. She'd never touched one before and the contrasting sensations was simply mesmerizing. It was thicker and longer than she could've imagined. Wrapping a hand around it, it felt like silk-covered steel and just touching it made her center ache and clench with want. She slowly but firmly gave a long downward stroke, relishing the smooth skin and rock hard length that seemed to harden even more within her hand, causing Sirius to let out a low hiss of pleasure as his head fell back against the pillow.

Taking that as all the encouragement she needed, she gripped the throbbing, thick member a touch tighter and with greater confidence as she began to stroke him again and again.

"Fuck, yes, love, just like that," he moaned, his deep voice heavy with want as his hips thrust up slightly to meet her beautiful strokes.

She smiled at the power she seemed to have over him. She leaned forward and kissed him, his lips hungrily taking her in as her hand worked at his cock, becoming even harder still at her ministrations.

As his breath grew more shallow, she began to pump even faster, drunk on the power of pleasing him and feeling wanted.

His arms suddenly gripped her sides and pulled her back, laying her gently upon the bed.

"No, not like that," he gasped, his voice hoarse with passion, his mahogany eyes burning with desire.

"Did you not like it?" she panted, looking unsure.

He chuckled deeply, "I liked it a little too much, kitten. Another minute and I would've been a goner," he smiled, tenderly stroking her hair, his eyes drinking her body in. "No, I want you," he whispered as his hands dipped to the waistband of her pajamas and teasingly skimmed along the edge.

She felt dizzy at his touch, and the sudden swell of lust and anticipation shot through her like a knife.

"Tell me what you want, what you like," he urged, kissing her neck and suckling at the sensitive skin.

"What you're doing is lovely," she reassured him, digging her hands into his thick curls.

He shook his head, "No, I want it to be perfect for you," he breathed. "Tell me and I'll do it. Anything you like."

"I-I don't know," she faltered slightly, blushing as he pulled back and looked at her questioningly.

"Have you…have you ever…done this before?" he asked, his eyes searching hers.

"Well, I mean, I've done...things before but, um...I haven't actually been with anyone," she admitted, looking away in discomfort.

"Not even with Ron? Or Harry? No one?" he asked, disbelievingly.

"I think I would've remembered," she softly quipped.

He gave a soft sigh at this, eyeing her with immense anguish before pulling back, his eyes downcast, his head shaking as he struggled to grasp a breath.

"No, no, love, we...we can't do this. We really need to stop," he said, his ardor cooling as he pulled away from her beautiful body.

"Why?" she asked, looking confused at his sudden change.

He paused, searching for the words. "Because..this...this isn't right," he said slowly, his velvety voice deep and low, lust still shining in his eyes.

"Don't you want me?" she asked, tenderly cupping his face with both hands.

"Love, you know I care for you, immensely so, but not like this."

"You don't find me...desirable?"

"Oh, Hermione, you know that's not it. You're absolutely gorgeous, truly you are."

"Then what's the problem?" she demanded.

"We just can't do this," he said firmly, sitting up and moving to the edge of the bed, facing away from her as he hung his head in his hands.

"Please, Sirius. Please," she begged, molding her body to his back, pressing her naked breasts against him and burying her face in the crook of his neck. "I need this. I want to feel you. I just want to feel something. Something besides anger and disappointment."

"Haven't you been lonely?" she asked, wrapping her arms and legs around his waist, breathing in his scent. "Doesn't it feel good?" she whispered, brushing her hand against his throbbing cock. "I'll do whatever you want me to do," she murmured against the shell of his ear. "I just need this, please. Just for tonight, let me have you."

His eyes fluttered shut at this, his cock hardening once more despite himself as she rubbed her eager palm against his boxers and she took this as all the encouragement she needed. She pulled him back once more, not that he put up much fight as he laid on his back. She strattled his body and leaned forward, covering his mouth with hot kisses as her hardened nipples rubbed against his chest and her molten wet center rubbed against him, over and over again.

Sirius gave a deep, ragged sigh, licking his lips at the delicious sensation slowly tingling down his whole body.

Watching him slowly come undone, she knew she had him in her grasp. She just had to be brave enough. She rolled off him and began pulling at his slacks, slipping them off with ease. All that lay between their nearly-naked bodies now were her thin pajama bottoms and his boxers. Lying down next to him, she kissed him deeply, the taste of his mouth an intoxicating elixir to her hollow, aching heart.

His hands threaded in her curls and he pulled her back ever so slightly, just looking at her now, a sorrow etching his face where passion had been just moments ago.

"It's not that I don't want you," he softly uttered, "I do, in fact. I want you so damn bad. You're so perfect and beautiful...but we're dear friends...doing this would destroy that."

"Sirius," she breathed, clutching his body against hers, "can't you see how desperately I want you?"

He closed his eyes and gave a sad shake, "I'm not the one you should be doing this with," he offered as he pulled away from her once more, avoiding her body.

"A witch like you deserves a true love, not just some roll in the hay, don't throw this away on me," he uttered sadly from the edge of her bed.

Sudden volatile anger bubbled up within her and she snapped, "So you're refusing to sleep with me because I'm a virgin? What, are you afraid I'll be rubbish?" she spat.

"For fuck's sake, no! I'm...I'm trying to do the right thing here. Because this is just a bad idea from top to bottom. This isn't you. You're not selfish and brash like this. You're careful and thoughtful, if we did this, you'd hate yourself tomorrow," he tried pointing out.

"I love you dearly, as a friend," he offered tenderly, his voice softening, "I don't want you to make the same stupid mistakes I have."

"It's fine," she snapped, pulling away from him and pulling the wrinkled bedsheet against her bare chest, as tears brimmed in her reddened eyes, "I get it...I can't even give it away."

"This isn't something you should be giving away," he countered heatedly. "You're angry and confused and this would just make all that so much worse, believe me. It would feel better for a short while, but then all those feelings you're trying to drown out would come back like a tidal wave."

"Don't tell me how I'm feeling! I know what I want, I want you!" she yelled vehemently.

"No, you don't, love. You want Severus and you can't have him, so you're willing take the next warm body."

"It's not like that. I care for you, Sirius, I truly do."

"So you want to get over Severus by getting under me? Sorry, love, it isn't that simple. Believe me, I've tried."

"How in the hell would you know what I'm going through?! You've never been in love!" she angrily spat.

"Who in the hell are you to say whether I've been in love or not?!" he snapped. "I've known love, dearest. Terrifying, exhilarating, incredible love...I just wasn't brave enough to act on it."

"And I've been exactly in your shoes," he uttered, "trying to deny it by sleeping with every witch I could charm into my bed, but it didn't help. It just makes the hunger that much sharper, it just makes you long for the real thing. Why do you think I've been single so damn long?" he demanded, angrily turning from her.

"You're telling me you've been waiting for the real thing?" she asked incredulously.

"No, that ship sailed a long time ago," he plainly stated. "It wasn't meant to be for me. I've simply...I've grown up. And I'm not going to settle for some vapid one night stand to fill that void. And neither should you."

She sighed, knowing he was absolutely right and hating him for it. She felt the well-spring of sorrow bubble up once more and hung her weary head in her hands.

"I'm just so tired of being alone," she tearfully admitted. He sat beside her and put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close in a tender embrace.

"You've got me and Remus and Harry," he uttered.

"Yeah, but it's not the same," she admitted, wiping her tears away as she rested her weary head on his shoulder.

"I know. I know," he sighed, pulling her snug against his chest, gently rubbing her bare back. "But trust me, it's better to be alone than with the wrong one."

She shook her head in utter defeat, wishing it were all that simple.

"Are you still in love?" she asked.

"Yeah, I am as a matter of fact."

"Who is it?" she couldn't help but ask, sitting up to look at him.

"Um, you might know 'em," he uttered, smiling ever so slightly. "Tall, beautiful, lovely gray eyes, amazing laugh, a bit hairy, but that really only happens once a month."

"R..Remus?" she whispered, her eyes wide.

"Yeah. That's the one," he smiled sadly.

"Oh, Sirius, he doesn't know, does he?"

"Of course not," he stated resolutely, looking away.

"Why haven't you told him?" she countered.

"Hmm, well let's see," he sighed, "for starters, he's obviously straight, because he married my cousin. It was a lovely little ceremony, I should know, too, I was there as his best man. Let's see, what else? Oh, yes, he also had a child with his lovely wife. A child that he is now raising alone because he lost that dear, amazing wife in a tragic, horrifying way. And he'll no doubt mourn her for all his days. So yeah...I feel like I've wisely chosen to keep my trap firmly shut and keep those feelings to myself. I get to be his best friend, that's enough," he said resolutely.

"Is it? Is it really enough?" she asked.

"No. Not at all. But it's a lovely little lie I tell myself to help get through the day."

"Merlin, that's depressing, Sirius."

"Tell me about it," he sadly chuckled.

"Him and Teddy, they're all I've got. I can't bear to lose them."

"You've got me and Harry," she noted, slipping her hand into his.

"Yeah, but as a wise witch once said, it's not the same," he said with a wistful smile as he let out a heavy sigh.

"We're pretty pathetic, aren't we?"

"Indeed," he agreed.

Looking around at the room, their clothing strewn everywhere, the tremendous weight of her impulsive, reckless actions came crashing down upon her with the force of a tidal wave.

"I'm...I'm sorry I threw myself at you. I was...I was out of line, I'm so sorry I put you in that spot," she blushed, pulling the bedsheet even tighter against her chest, horrible shame filling her heart at the terrible mistake they had just narrowly avoided.

"Getting propositioned by a gorgeous young witch? Believe me, I've suffered worse things," he playfully teased.

"Merlin, when you say it like that...I'm such an arse," she groaned as she buried her reddened face in her hands.

"Hermione, you are no such thing," he consoled, as he hugged her tenderly. "You're special...far too special for a bum like me. You deserve a real love, one who will worship you and never take you for granted. And even if Severus never realizes how perfect you truly are, you should never settle for anything less. You hear me? So you promise me, you'll hold out for the real thing?" he emphasized.

She sighed at her hopelessly romantic friend. "Only if you promise too," she reluctantly countered.

"Cross my heart," he sweared.

She wrapped her arms around him, resting against his chest and felt her mind clear for the first time that night.

Suddenly, a gentle knock came from outside her bedroom door.

"Hermione? Dearest, are you in there? Severus is here to see you," came Remus' soft voice from outside her door.

"Shit," Sirius quietly hissed, looking just as panicked as Hermione at their surprise visitors.

The pair sat bolt upright, each half-naked and tangled in sheets when the door swung open to reveal Remus and Severus both standing in the doorway. The sight that greeted the two men was a sobering one.

"Oh, god!" Remus blurted out, as he caught sight of Hermione trying to cover up.

"I'm...I'm so sorry I didn't mean to interrupt. Forgive me, I'm...I'm so sorry..." he stammered as he blushed and rushed out of her room.

"No, Remus, wait!" Sirius called out but the wolf had already fled, his footsteps rapidly retreating down the creaky wooden steps.

"God fucking damnit," Sirius cursed as he bolted from the bed and raced out of the room after Remus.

That left Severus all alone to witness the mess he had made. Her clothes on the floor, the rumpled sheets, her face wild with pain and sorrow. He could barely breathe just taking in the scene before him. Of course she had run to Black, what choice had he given her.

Her whole body ached, physically so, just looking at him. The betrayal and hurt, so plainly clear in his eyes; she hated herself for causing him such pain. Wretched, breathtaking guilt and shame suffused her. She longed to run to him, kiss him, beg his forgiveness, but as she made to stand, it was then that she remembered: she didn't mean anything to him for he had thrown her away. Hot, all-consuming anger rose up within her as she realized she didn't owe him a goddamn thing.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, her voice choked and strained, as she wrapped her arms tight around the bedsheet.

"I was worried about you," he weakly replied.

A hollow laugh escaped her lips. "Worried about me?! How kind of you," she snapped, still seated on the bed, her eyes filling once more with tears.

"Hermione, I-" he began.

"What's that on your neck?" she cut him off, her eyes narrowing at him.

His face betrayed his confusion at her abrupt question and his hand reflexively touched at the spot she was looking at so intently. His fingers rubbed a moment before he felt something sticky and slick coat his digits. His mind whirled at what it could possibly be when it dawned on him with a sickening thud.

She stood from the bed, wrapping the bedsheet snug against her as she came towards him.

"Is that...lipstick?" she asked disbelievingly, a look of pure shock twisting her face.

Standing before him, she grabbed his chin and forcefully turned his head as she pulled his collar down several inches, revealing a multitude of smeared, red kisses littering his neck, with even more disappearing into his shirt.

She leaned into him, smelling his shirt and then gasped, pulling away from him to stare up into his eyes with something close to grief.

"You've been with Narcissa tonight, haven't you?"

His breath caught painfully in his chest as he took in the anguish lacing her eyes, her beautiful mouth quivering.

"Her perfume," she croaked, looking at him as if she was speaking to an utter stranger, "I'd know it anywhere," she softly uttered, tears falling down her reddened cheeks.

"Hermione, please let me-"

"And to think that I felt ashamed just now. As if I had betrayed you?" she softly cried. "What a fool I am," she breathed. "When will I learn?"

"Nothing happened with Nar-"

"Go," she bit out, her face crumpling with despair, "just leave!"

She turned on her heel and ran to her bathroom, slamming the door hard.

Severus stared at the closed door, his whole body suddenly weakened and spent. The sound of gentle sobbing could be heard coming from her bathroom. Tears filled his eyes at the heartbreaking sound.

How on earth could he have let this happen? How many horrid mistakes could one man make?

He wanted to rush to her, with all his heart, but he knew he would only cause her more pain. That's all he was good for.

He silently left Hermione's room, shutting the door with a soft click. As he descended the many stairs, he could hear Remus and Sirius arguing and Teddy wailing, but he didn't stop, for he had caused enough disasters for one evening. He left the ancient and noble house of Black, and stood out on the deserted street, letting the driving rain pelt his weak soul, feeling more lost and alone than he ever had.