a/n: xFlipJamsx and I were talking about the last chapter of Gaiden weeks ago, and I told her I was trying to form a story in my head. Then I played The Corrs' "All the Love in the World" on repeat and finally, this idea happened.
Oh, and yes, I do not own Naruto no matter how many fanfics I write for this fandom.
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It wasn't the cold descent of rain darts on her skin that brought her feet to a halt.
She was running through the rain when she felt the achingly familiar chakra. Missions with Suigetsu and Juugo under the supervision of one of the legendary sannin, Orochimaru, had never ceased. Even years after the Fourth Great Ninja War, they continued to pursue their operations to gain further knowledge on medical and genetic advancement until everything about her life just bled into clockwork.
They were tracing the lead to some unusual activity until they decided to split up for a more efficient and fruitful mission. But she forgot all about the mission the moment she felt his presence nearby. With the rain pelting against her figure and the forest mud caking on her soles, she retraced her steps, before turning back fully towards her previous direction, towards where he was.
She saw him under the shade of an overhanging tree with imminent drops hanging at the tip of the leaves. He had no coat on, his white garment sticking to his form, yet even so, his face was scrunched in deep concentration as he scanned the surroundings, the tomoe in his eyes madly swirling.
Until those eyes landed on her.
It wasn't the intensity but the detachment of his gaze that stunned her, and she had to step back, to move, to drag out his name from her lips. She had just opened her mouth when she finally noticed the figure beside him: a woman leaning against the trunk, a cloak protecting her body, stray pink hair plastered to the side of her face. Karin noted the delicate color of her hair, compared it with the hue of hers – that of an infected wound – and she wanted to scoff at the mockery. But it stilled her to see the woman smiling at her in earnest despite the marks of exhaustion lining the woman's eyes.
"Karin," the woman greeted.
Karin tried to return the expression but could only manage to give a vacuous smile. She then saw how Sasuke crouched beside his companion to help her stand and how he turned back with a weary and worried look.
"Help my wife."
She sharply looked away. The dim epiphany of the implications of his request was urging her to run away and pretend that she never saw them, that she never knew him.
"Please."
And yet the stark reality of his presence, of his reason for that request of help grounded her, pinned her to her rightful place.
Going to Taka's newest hideout was supposed to be easy since it was just in the vicinity. But it was hard for her especially when her every footstep was heavy with the desire to look back and un-see what she knew was the truth. She shoved her cluttered feelings aside and led the way, feeling the spongy earth and sludge of fallen leaves beneath her feet until they found the much-trodden path to the hideout, a convenient shack in the middle of a forest.
She had been thinking about him ever since the war ended. She thought she would pay a visit when she got the time or after finishing a milestone of her research. She even had this long-ago dream of him suddenly showing up at their hideout asking how they, she, had been. When she was jolted awake by an unceremonious clangor on the wall (Suigetsu's doing), she fantasized about the continuation of her dream: Sasuke staying with them.
She only realized now just how big of a dream all of that was.
With the various medical apparatus and equipment stacked against the wall or poking out of a corner in disarray, there was only the center space that could allow them to perform the necessary procedure.
Karin proceeded to prepare the needed tools. She would hurl rapid glances towards them every now and then: a low-slumbering fire, a makeshift bed, soulful gazes, Sakura smiling in delight and anticipation, Sasuke brushing hair off her forehead, hands together.
The steam of the hot water from the basin was stinging her eyes, and she had to blink back the moisture.
When she was done, she told Sasuke as professionally as possible to go outside first ("I'll call you when it's done, Sasuke") but he didn't spare her a glance.
"No," he said, his gaze never leaving Sakura's face.
Sakura gave out a soft chuckle. "But this is a woman thing, Sasuke-kun."
Karin wondered how different her form of address to Sasuke was from Sakura's.
Sasuke just expelled a sigh. "I'm not going outside, Sakura," he insisted calmly, his tone, uncompromising.
Then it hit her: Sasuke would always respond to Sakura's call.
She could see how Sakura was so ready to retort except that what came out was a choked gasp instead. Sakura lifted her upper torso a bit off the bed, seemingly wanting to double over as she pressed her hand on her swollen belly.
"It's time," Karin whispered rather muddily, but Sakura just nodded and laid her head back down on the pillow.
"Just do as I say so," she said to ready Sakura, to ready herself for going off the deep end.
She then began barking out instructions, but when she saw that Sakura was profusely sweating, she levelled her tone and switched to giving words of encouragement. She had to keep her focus on the task. She would pretend she didn't see how Sasuke brushed back Sakura's hair, or how he stroked her hand on and off as he let Sakura dig her nails into his palm in an attempt to subdue the pain, or how restless he actually was that he would drop feather kisses on Sakura's white knuckles.
The baby was a non-identity when she saw it for the first time. She announced that it was a girl, and she held it as if it were a specimen – just another texture of life, the small body smeared with patches of blood, the black hair matted and sticky with the same red substance.
But she heard it cry, and she felt a sick resonance in her bone. She looked at the couple who was expectantly looking back at her – the baby she was holding wasn't just another life; it was their life.
With her hands beginning to shake, she gave it to Sakura who immediately, tenderly pressed it against her bosom and eagerly inched closer to Sasuke who then made a tentative touch to the baby's small hands. It was then that Karin realized that indeed, the baby belonged to them, and they were no longer just Sasuke and Sakura but a family now.
She felt her eyes suddenly fatigued and dry. She closed them for a moment before standing, too prepared to walk out of this scene where she couldn't play a part.
"Karin. Thank you. Thank you so much," Sakura smiled at her, her eyes lidded with tears.
Karin managed to smile back wistfully yet genuinely. "No..." she rasped, "No problem."
She tried not to look at Sasuke, but she did anyway, and it was then that she saw Sasuke looking at her for the first time without any hint of indifference or disgust. His eyes were bright, and the curve of his lips allowed itself to form a smile for her, finally.
"We owe this to you, Karin."
And probably, she thought, that would be the last time she would hear him saying her name.
...
She was sitting against the cheek of a boulder outside their hideout, finding the beauty in the dismal evening landscape when she felt a presence beside her.
"You should be resting," she intoned distantly although it was not intentional. She really just thought that a woman who had just given birth shouldn't be feeling such coldness of the gusting wind.
There was silence, and then:
"Thank you, Karin," Sakura began.
"You've said way too many thank you," she drawled, finding interest in looking around at the ghosts of trees and skittering leaves.
Sakura just chuckled, and Karin knew it was the kind that never failed to comfort Sasuke. She wished, she wished it had the same effect on her, too.
"I'm thanking you this time for being there for Sasuke-kun. For healing him every time, for saving him, for staying, for not giving up on him," Sakura touched her hand, making Karin face her, before she continued, "for loving him. Thank you."
The keen wind felt like blade against Karin's eyes, and she reined in her tears. This woman beside her, this woman that Sasuke loved, this woman that could never be her was giving her a heartfelt gratitude, and she just didn't know if she even deserved it because somehow, she wanted to say:
"But he chose you."
She wanted to yell at Sakura, make her realize that thanking her for everything she had done for Sasuke wouldn't and would never make the pain of not being chosen, of not being loved an easier pill to swallow.
"I want our daughter to know about you. I want Sarada to meet you, the one who helped me bring her to this world, the one who had helped her father when I couldn't."
Karin could see her warm and vibrant smile despite the failing light of the moon, but she hoped Sakura wasn't seeing the tears now shattering her mask, streaking her face.
Sakura squeezed her hand lightly.
"You deserve all the beautiful things...all the love in this world. I wish you happiness, Karin."
Then just like that, Karin broke down, pillowing her head on her soft arms now resting on her knees that she had hugged to her chest.
She thought of happiness amidst the copious tears. She didn't know what kind of happiness would be available for her. But for now, she was willing to admit that she was happy, happy to see Sasuke for one last time, happy to see him loved so dearly, happy to know he was capable of being happy, happy to see him finally reaching his own happiness.
With Sakura staying silently beside her, Karin cried and cried until she was spent, until her tears no longer spelled pain.
...
Fin.
(This piece is never meant to bash Karin. For Karin lovers, I hope I did her character justice. I am really sorry if I didn't. I hope there will be a filler (please Kishi do something!) about Sakura and Karin's friendship. And I hope I can do a SuiKa fic but that's not a possibility for now. Please review!)