Title: Hey Brother
Author: SPNxBookworm
Artist: Kuwlshadow
Genre: AU, angst, hurt/comfort, horror, family
Pairing: Dean/Castiel, brotherly Sam and Dean
Rating: PG – 13
Word Count: ~21.5k

Warnings: Swearing, violence, self – worth issues, sexual situations, suicide mention, grief, child death and major character death

Summary: The mesmerizing night sky doesn't really depict the actual events that take place on land. That particular night was nothing but pain for Dean Winchester. He lost everything that night, his brother, his angel, everything. He chooses to ignore it however as he and Sam set off on a case when kids mysteriously start disappearing from their homes. Both brothers want to act as if everything is normal when in fact, tension is in the air and Dean tries to hide the pain and grief to make it easier for them. But trying to pretend that the problems don't exist won't make them go away, no matter how much you want them to. After everything that has happened, it's only a matter of time before Dean snaps and his world comes crumbling down at his feet. AU after 10.09 'The Things We Left Behind.'

Acknowledgements:

There are quite a number of people I'd like to thank:

My artist kuwlshadow for being the most amazing person and creating the most beautiful pieces of artwork in record time despite her shifts at the hospital. I am in so much awe and have so much respect for her. Like seriously, I can't stop smiling and staring at the amazing job she's done. Thanks for being such a doll and encouraging me every step of the way. And most importantly, thank you for choosing my fic. It was a pleasure working with you.

My beta zana_zira for helping make this fic even remotely readable. Thanks for listening to all my insecurities and enduring the numerous amount of emails I sent you in regards to this fic. Thanks for never giving up on me.

My two amazing girls Chronic Potterphile/Pooja and remy-areyousrs/Naila for being the biggest support system while writing this fic. Thank you girls for believing in me when I didn't. You are one of the biggest reasons I was even able to complete this fic. Naila, thank you for putting up with me and my late night ramblings and your help with all the Sam and Dean moments throughout the fic. Thank you for all your constructive criticism. Pooja, the Destiel in this fic would not be the way it is without you. Thank you for helping out and assisting with the brotherly moments as well. You girls have never left my side and I appreciate and respect you so much for that.

Finally, Wendy over at SPN J2 Big Bang on Livejournal for being such a kind soul and hosting this every year! YOU ARE FREAKING AMAZING.

Author's Note: Holy crap, that was a lot of people. But seriously, without them, this fic wouldn't be here. Just a mention that I've done my best to balance out the Destiel and the SamnDean. At the end of the day, although this fic contains Destiel, it mainly boils down to Sam and Dean and their relationship as brothers.

I know I've been MIA a lot here and I sincerely apologize. Anyone waiting for other fic updates, I promise you they will come soon. I was busy in finals and finals prep along with a lot of personal things. If there's any PM or review that I haven't replied to, rest assured I will get back to you. This fic is an alternate universe after 10.09 'The Things We Left Behind.'

Please do read the warnings above before you start reading.

This fic is completed and will be updated twice a week.

Enjoy! :D


Chapter 1

NOW

Daniel jerks awake with a start, gasping as though he's run a mile. His eyes roam his surroundings and a slight sense of fear creeps in. He'd been in his room, staying up to study hard for a math quiz the next day. How did he end up here?

And where is here exactly?

Daniel shakily gets to his feet, wrapping his arms around himself. The last thing he remembers is a damp, salty smell as he feels himself pass out. And the next thing he knows, he's waking up in what seems to be a cave. The walls are dark and jutting out unevenly throughout. The floor feels rough and cold. And there's just enough illumination for Daniel to make out his hand in front of his face.

Daniel curls his bare toes against the cold expanse of floor and squints, looking for a way out. His heart beats rapidly, as he tries not to cry. He's scared and wants nothing more than to curl up in his mother's arms. He pinches himself, wanting to wake up out of this nightmare.

He turns towards his left and spots light coming in from an opening a few hundred feet away, almost like a light at the end of a tunnel. Finding no other way to go, Daniel decides to follow the light, praying that it's a way out.

He stumbles over the uneven surface a few times in the darkness, but keeps going. He shivers and wraps his arms tighter around himself. It's cold, and he's wearing nothing but his pajamas. The sound of his chattering teeth and fast breathing is amplified in the silence of the cave.

As he's halfway towards the opening of the cave, the sound of water, probably waves crashing onto a shore, reaches his ears.

Water, he thinks, as he realizes how thirsty he feels.

His gait quickens and soon enough, he steps foot out of the cave. His feet now move across soft sand as his eyes are fixed only on the large mass of sea before him.

Harsh winds blows across the scene as the rough sea crashes toward random groups of rocks scattered across the shore.

Daniel stops for a few seconds to register his surroundings, as he absently wraps his arms even tighter around himself.

A beach, he thinks. All he can make out is sand that meets with the sea, which stretches out towards the horizon.

Parched, Daniel hurries towards the water, kneels against one of the groups of rocks for support and cups his hands to fill some water into them. Just as he's about to raise his hands to drink the water, the corner of his eyes catch a white object near the rocks.

A terrified scream leaves his throat as he stumbles backwards on all fours, eyes wide in fear as he stares at the skull before him.

Fear turns to curiosity which ends up getting the better of him. Though still shaken, Daniel shakily crawls back up to the skull. As he looks closer, his heart skips a beat. A whole pile of bones rests before the skull.

A broken sob leaves his mouth as he gets to his feet. He needs to get out of here. He needs to find his mother. He needs to get back home. This needs to be a nightmare.

He turns around and his breath hitches as he startles seeing the creature standing before him. Dark mane, pale skin that turns into serpentine scales halfway. A menacing smile on its face.

"No!" he screams as the creature starts slithering towards him.

"MOM!"

~o~

Dean doesn't realize he's fallen asleep until he feels a cold hand on his shoulder and jumps awake, years of training making him instinctively get to his feet. He whips out a small dagger that he always has on him.

"Whoa," says Sam, his hands raised in surrender. "Dude, it's just me."

"Jesus, Sammy," Dean grumbles as he runs a hand across his face, throwing the weapon onto the table. "I told you to stop doing that."

He sits back down on his chair, bringing his laptop closer to him.

"Did you even sleep last night, Dean?" Sam asks.

"It's none of your business, Sam," Dean curtly replies.

"No, Dean. It is. None of this is helping you, man. You need to get some rest, not stay up all night doing research."

Dean scoffs as he looks at Sam. "I don't recall you listening to me when I've said the same thing to you."

Sam opens and closes his mouth a few times. "Well, that's – that's different -"

Dean shakes his head. "No it's not, Sam. Look, I tried sleeping, alright? I couldn't so I figured I'd be productive. Only, I obviously ended up dozing off here. I'm fine, dude. Stop worrying."

Dean looks back towards his laptop, determinedly ignoring Sam. The latter soundlessly leaves after a defeated sigh and Dean lets out a breath of relief.

Dean knows Sam means well. But after all that's happened, Dean just can't be the person Sam expects him to be. Dean can't pretend that everything is normal. Dean can't pretend that everything isn't broken anymore.

He takes in a shaky breath as he pushes his computer away from himself.

"Screw this," he mutters as he gets to his feet to head towards the kitchen, only one thought on his mind as he absently massages the Mark on his arm.

To get drunk as fuck and pass the hell out. Right now, that seems like the only option to numb the pain.

~o~

Sam walks into the library a while later to find Dean exactly where he left him, except for an addition to the scene. A bottle of whiskey and a half empty glass.

Sam sighs and decides not to call Dean out on it.

"Hey," he says as he sits across from Dean.

Dean acknowledges his presence with a nod and a sip of his drink, his eyes fixed on the computer in front of him.

"I'm supposed to be the one slaving away at a computer, you know," Sam voices, casual.

Dean chuckles. "Don't worry. It isn't research. I just thought we'd been on our asses doing nothing this past week so I found us a case."

Sam raises his eyebrows in query. Dean had pretty much put them on every case he could find, almost every other week. They hadn't really been sitting on their asses, just taking a few days off from hunting. Sam isn't surprised that Dean wants to get back into it. But if this is what helps Dean, then so be it. He wouldn't argue against his brother.

"So what did you find?" Sam asks, leaning forwards on the table.

Dean clears his throat. "Seven kids have gone missing in New Haven, Connecticut. I didn't think much of it until I did some digging and found this," Dean says as he turns the laptop around and points to the article currently open.

"All these kids were abducted from their own bedrooms. The windows were locked, doors closed and no sign of break-in either. Nothing at all. And the only thing the police found in each of these rooms was sea salt."

Sam frowns as he pulls the laptop towards himself. "Sea salt?" he asks, skeptical.

Dean nods. "Dude, I'm as clueless as you are. But I think it's worth checking out."

"Are you sure?" Sam asks. "I mean, there are a lot more hunters than just us out there. And we just came back from a case a coupl ago. Don't you think you should rest up?"

"So you're willing to leave this case be and let more kids be kidnapped, if they're not dead already?" Dean counters, stern. He knows that Sam's concerned. But sitting on his ass all day doing nothing will not solve anything. The least he can do is try to help those who need it.

Sam groans inwardly. "Dean – "

"No, Sam. I know what you're trying to do and I'm not buying it. I'm fine. And I'm leaving whether you're coming with me or not."

Saying so, Dean stomps out of the library making his way towards his room.

Sam sighs as he watches Dean go. He hadn't meant to piss Dean off. Running a hand across his face, Sam gets to his feet and heads towards his own room.

~o~

Dean grins as he sees Sam walking towards the Impala. "Couldn't ignore the case, could you?" he teases, trying to make up for his outburst back in the bunker. Thanks for coming along with me.

Sam smirks. "Just shut up and get in the car," he says as he opens the passenger side door. Wouldn't miss it.

A few hours later, Dean pulls up at The Red Rose Lodge. As he cuts the engine, Sam steps out and walks over to the trunk to get their stuff out while Dean jogs to the reception desk to get a room. A teenage boy, probably not older than fifteen, gives Dean a bored look as he walks in.

"Welcome to the most shitty ass motel in town. How may I help you?"

Dean looks amused as he replies, "Great way to gain customers, kiddo."

The kid shrugs, but says nothing more. Dean stands awkwardly for a few minutes until the teen raises his eyebrows in question.

"Oh," Dean snaps out if it. "Yeah. One room, please. Two single beds."

Soon enough, Dean has the room keys in hand and is walking back over to Sam, who is waiting near the trunk of the Impala with their duffels near his feet.

Dean is still working to get the puzzled look off his face as he reaches Sam.

"What's up?" Sam asks. "You look worried."

"That kid in there is weird, man. He seems so out of it. And just as I was leaving he gave me this… look. And the only thing he said was, 'There's a reason this place is called The Red Rose Lodge.' If I didn't know better, I'd say he's possessed."

Sam chuckles as he picks up both their duffels and follows Dean towards their motel room. "Dude, this place looks empty. I doubt a lot of people stop by here. That kid was just bored out of his mind. He was probably just pulling your leg."

Dean grunts back in response, earning an eye roll from Sam. Dean quickly unlocks the door and enters, stopping abruptly and making Sam walk right into him.

"Dean, what the – "Sam starts but as soon as he lays eyes on the room, he understands.

"The kid was right," Dean croaks.

The walls of the motel room are painted dark red, looking almost like blood. The floor is a dark green. The small table along with its two chairs have numerous red roses painted on them making them almost invisible as they blend in with the wall. The bedsheets have red roses printed on them, complete with the green stems and thorns. The pillow cases match with the bedsheet.

Dean looks up towards the ceiling and gasps audibly. The ceiling is covered with rose stems, intertwined with one another looking more like menacing vines than anything else.

"It's not so bad," Sam tries. "I mean, we've had worse. Like the Halloween themed one we'd been at where everything was just pumpkins and bats, or that one motel where it looked like someone had puked all over the room. This is manageable, right?"

Dean knows Sam is trying to make it easier for them and he appreciates it. But it's not helping at all.

"Please not the bathroom," Dean mutters under his breath as he opens the door and turns on the light. "Crap," he says.

Sam follows. "Oh no," he mutters, seeing the interior of the bathroom.

It seems to have followed the same theme of red walls and green floors.

The basin is shaped like a rose, again, painted red. The tap is green while its handles are pointed and almost conical, shaped like thorns. The shower curtains have roses printed on them in symmetrical rows and columns. The shower head is also shaped like a rose with its pipe leading up to the wall is painted a dark green, with small spikes in irregular intervals protruding out of the pipe to signify thorns.

"At least the toilet isn't rose shaped," Sam supplies, as he points to the green but otherwise normal toilet.

"Yeah, Sam. Thanks for the memo," Dean grumbles as he shoves past his brother and gingerly sits on the bed closest to the door, looking highly out of his comfort zone.

Sam sighs as he deposits their duffels near each of their beds. "Dude, we can look for another motel if it's bothering you so much."

Dean immediately shakes his head in denial. "Nah," he says, trying to sound nonchalant. "Like you said, we've had worse. We'll manage. It's only for a few days, anyway."

Dean glares when Sam purses his lips and looks away. Dean knows that his little brother is trying to hide a smile, or worse, a laugh. Sam will regret it if he decides to so much as even chuckle right now.

Sam clears his throat awkwardly gets up. "I'm going to go get some food then. Why don't you make yourself comfortable?"

Before Dean can say anything, Sam is out of the room. Dean decides to let it go for now. It's been a while since things have been this… easy between them. And Dean knows better than to go and spoil it.

He turns on the T.V. and flips through the channels with a small smile on his face as he waits for Sam to arrive.

~o~

3:07 am.

Dean glances at the clock and tosses yet again on his bed. Sam is on the other bed, his back facing Dean. Probably awake, Dean suspects. He sighs as he shifts again so that he is lying on his back, staring at the ceiling.

He knows what would help him right now, but it's something he can't have. And every time he thinks of it, the hole in his chest just keeps getting bigger. Dean wishes so much that he could have had one last chance to talk to him. To make amends. But it was too late. It's always too late, with his fucked up Winchester luck.

"Cas," Dean breathes as his thoughts drift.

THEN

"Dean, we've been sitting like this for thirty minutes now," Charlie says as she sips her drink.

Dean nods and gulps. How the hell is he supposed to do this? He's never even thought of this before, let alone confess it to someone. "Yeah. Just gimme a sec," he says.

"You're stalling," Charlie remarks. "I'm not stupid. What's on your mind? You look nervous. And as far as I've heard, Dean Winchester is never nervous."

Dean chuckles, feeling a little bit better.

"Dean?"

Dean nods, looking up at Charlie. "Deep breath," she says. He nods again as he takes a deep breath. "Okay. Now talk. Why did you call me here?" she asks as she gestures around the small bar they're sat in, only a few minutes away from the bunker.

Dean clears his throat. "Okay. All right. I just…wanted to ask something, if that's okay."

"Shoot."

Dean downs his shot and resorts to fiddling with the glass as he asks, "Um, how… how did you know?"

"Know what?"

Dean takes another deep breath. He's never felt this way. And if there's one person that can help him figure this out, it's Charlie. "H-How did you know that you liked… girls, and not guys?"

"You mean how did I figure out I was a lesbian?" Charlie asks.

"Yeah," Dean replies.

"You know... people. Things. Why exactly?"

"Nothing. Just, uh, y'know... did you…?," Dean makes a vague motion with his fingers. "Before…?"

"You mean did I ever have to do the dirty to actually find out?" Charlie counters.

Dean looks flustered and slightly mortified. "Uh… Maybe? Just help me out here, please? It's just a... curious question."

"Well," Charlie purses her lips as she narrows her eyes at him. "My childhood wasn't really that hot, as you know. I think I was probably fourteen or fifteen. I'd been staying at this home for a few weeks. This woman named Talia helped take in kids who'd lost their way. I didn't give her all the details but I told her that my folks died in a car crash and I just wanted somewhere to stay for a while. She was nice. Took me in. She had a few other kids there. I was there for about four months until she came. Gemma. She was the most beautiful person I'd ever seen. I never really had any boyfriends or anything so I didn't know what it was that I felt.

"Turns out, I had a crush on her. And... I actually never told her. But a few months after that I kinda just bolted. Looked around for gay bars and shit and hung out with people. Had a steady relationship for a while with this girl named Trisha but it ended after a while. Just didn't work out. I guess I've never had to really come out to people, y'know? I know of kids out there that are terrified of doing it because they might not be understood but I've never had to go through that."

Charlie sighs and then squints and looks at Dean. "Why are you asking me this anyway? Something up?" she asks. Her eyes then widen as it hits her. "Dude. You're totally falling for a guy, aren't you?"

Dean immediately averts his eyes. "N-No, I'm just curious. That's all," Dean lies.

Charlie's tone suddenly softens catching Dean off guard. "Dean, you know you can tell me anything right? You're like a brother to me, and you and Sam are like family. Go ahead. What's up? Really?"

Dean gulps nervously. "Yeah. I think I like someone. And... well, yeah. Just don't know how to figure this crap out," he grumbles.

"It's Cas, isn't it?" Charlie asks.

"W-what? C-Cas? Seriously? Pfft," Dean splutters, wondering how the sister he never had caught on so quickly.

Charlie gives him a look of disbelief. Dean chuckles. "That obvious?" he teases.

Charlie nods. "We've seen the way you two look at each other, and like, you two seem to have no concept of personal space either. It's not too hard to work out," she says, grinning.

"Wait," Dean says. "We?"

"Oops, fucked up," Charlie mutters under her breath. She then turns to Dean. "Um, yup. See, Sam kinda sees it too. He kinda owes me a hundred bucks since we'd bet on who would come out first. Sam had thought Cas would and well, he's wrong."

Dean looks flabbergasted. "You guys bet on us?"

"You have no idea how obvious it is between you and Cas, Dean. Anyway, I got places to be, things to see, so anything else?" Charlie asks.

Dean hesitates. There's a lot of things he wants to ask, but just doesn't know how. Somehow, though, Charlie seems to understand.

She smiles gently as she says, "Just tell him, you idiot. Tell him you're into him. Trust me. It'll go well."

"Thanks," Dean says, sincere.

"Don't mention it. Peace out, bitch," she says as she gives a fleeting hug to Dean and leaves the bar.

NOW

Dean smiles to himself. It's where everything had started. For once he'd actually felt like he could have this. A sense of longing and grief engulfs him knowing that it's all gone now. And it's his fault. He should never have let this happen.

He works to neutralize his emotion as he turns away from Sam and faces the opposite wall.

3:40 am.

Dean falls into an uneasy sleep with an angel haunting his dreams.


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