A/N: So as some of you may have heard, I had a very minor emergency mini-surgery done on my tailbone to get rid of a cyst that had popped up a week ago. And by emergency, I mean I went to the surgeon for an examination yesterday and found myself in the ER with her ten minutes later. I wrote this when I got home and was high as a kite on morphine. So if it makes no sense...you know why.

Cobra frowned.

His hand patted the sheets to his immediate right once more, registering the empty side. His sole indigo eye peeked open, staring at the depression in the fluffy green pillow beside him, and the crumpled up sheets tucked near him. A quick glance at the clock on the bedside revealed it to be close to three in the morning.

Just where was his pregnant wife?

The level of warmth left over led him to believe it had only been about fifteen minutes since she had up and left, and he could still hear her in the house. He smiled gently when he heard the gentle hum of their daughter's developing soul, a pretty little noise that was hidden by the loud echos of his mate's. Concentrating, he tried to hear just what she was doing.

A loud crash, the shattering of glass, and a soft squeak followed by radio silence had him abandoning his thoughts and scrambling out of bed. He slid on the floor in his haste, the heavy beat of his footsteps in tune with the loud throb of his heart as it pounded painfully against his chest. He couldn't hear or smell any intruders, but it was still possible that someone had set a trap earlier when the couple had been at the Guild.

He knew Lucy was fully capable of fending for herself. She could work a whip and summon her Spirits and roundhouse with no mercy, but she was six months pregnant with low dexterity, fluctuating magic, and unable to kick for fear of straining the child. Cobra's breath quickened as he paused only for a moment by the stairs, debating rushing down them or jumping down to the first floor. Deciding speed was more pertinent, he leapt over the rail, dropping to a crouch in the living room, and skidded to a stop in front of the kitchen.

"Lucy!"

His blonde wife lay in the fetal position on the floor, the shattered remnants of a glass jar around her frame. Red jelly spilled across the tiles, making a mess of the grout and her hair. Lucy's watery brown eyes slowly gazed up and made contact with his. Her lower lip trembled as she sniffed. "Erik...the jelly jar broke."

"I see that," he replied, exhaling shakily. She was okay. He didn't smell her blood, and heard no sounds of physical pain from her soul-just anger at herself. Sighing, he tiptoed over the glass pieces and grabbed a plastic bag, returning to collect all the pieces from the floor. All the while, Lucy followed his movements with her eyes.

"Why did you come down to get jelly at three in the morning, Bright Eyes?" he asked. Though he knew it was because she was hungry, he was curious to see what long tale her sleepy brain would come up with.

"Erika wanted jelly and peanut butter sandwiches. With hot fudge on top," had the combination of his mating mark rendering her immune to poisons and their daughter requiring poisons to grow properly not existed, he was certain Lucy's appetite would have killed the both of them early on. Shaking his head lightly, he picked up the final big piece of glass and threw it in the bag, which he placed by the table to his left. He rose, moving to get a piece of bread, which he then used to collect the tinier shards on the floor.

"Erika needs to stop giving daddy heart attacks this early on in life," Cobra grumbled, throwing the bread into the bag. He helped Lucy up slowly, helping her into a chair and giving her a clean towel to clean off her hair and sticky neck. She rubbed at the red juice absently as she replied, "Erika says sorry, doesn't she?"

Cobra paused cleaning the jelly off the floor, smiling softly at his mate's rounded belly. He patted it lightly. "It's okay. Growing girls need lots of food. I have two to look after now."

Lucy scowled. "You're only two years older than me, asshole."

"Really? Because last I checked, I'm twenty-nine, and you're, what, twenty?" he snickered when she pouted adorably. "I'm twenty-seven! My birth certificate says twenty-seven!"

"I thought women liked being mistaken for being younger than they really were?" he threw away the soiled paper towels and returned to wiping the floor with the jet-spray mop. Lucy mumbled, "Not when you make me feel like a kid."

"If it makes you feel any better, technically the feathery demon whore is eight years older than the stripper, and they're fine," he shot her a grin when she laughed merrily. "Gray really goes for the older women, eh? Ah, don't tell him that, he'll flip shit."

"Hence why I will be telling him," he knelt in front of her, bumping his nose against her stomach. "Erika still hungry?"

The loud rumble was all the answer he needed. Laughing, he kissed the firm flesh swiftly and stood. "I'll go get a shirt and grab something from the convenience store."

Lucy brightened. "I wanna go!"

"Then get changed, your clothes are dirty."

"Jelly, jelly, jelly..." Lucy cooed as she pressed her nose to the display case. "Jelly filled cups..."

Cobra and Max exchanged an amused glance as they observed the woman, who was mumbling incoherently at the bags of jelly cups.

"Thanks again, Max," Cobra whispered to the one Fairy Tail Mage he could actually stand. He wasn't loud, he didn't start brawls, was actually intelligent and could hold a conversation, and was fairly powerful himself. Max nodded. "Not a problem, Cobra. We were open late today because of the street festival, anyway."

Cobra smirked. "Minerva's idea?"

Max shuddered. "That woman is a nightmare when pregnant. Nightmare."

"Oh, I'll show you nightmare," a cold voice came from behind the two. Minerva Orlando stood proudly, donning a fluffy blue robe that did little to hide her third-trimester heavy midsection, and had death written across her beautiful features. Her husband chuckled weakly. "Min! Hey, baby-"

"Sofa for a week and you have to watch the birth," she deadpanned before he could finish his apologies. "Excuse me, I'm going to go to Lucy now."

Lucy squealed when her friend made her way over, embracing her tightly. Their bellies bumped gently, sparking a conversation about the babies. Lucy's hands rubbed Minerva's ballooning stomach, and both of them squeaked when they felt the baby kick.

Max blinked as Minerva opened the display case and pulled out a large bag of jelly cups, tearing it open and offering it to the blonde by her side. "We're gonna be here all night."

"Yup," Cobra nodded. They stood in silence for a while before Max pulled out a deck of cards. "UNO?"

"Third time this week," Cobra mumbled, but he shuffled the multicolored deck willingly anyway.

A/N: Summary fooled you, didn't it. I played with your heart, didn't I. BAHAHAHA.

-Touko