Written for the QLFC Season 6 - Round 4

Chuddley Canons - Chaser 2 (stand-in)

Prompt: Write from a pet's perspective about their everyday life.

Optional Prompts:
[1] Secret Life of Pets (Movie)
[12] Pillow (word)
[14] No Names (restriction)

Word Count: 1,545

He sat atop the wooden perch, head resting upon his chest. He had closed his eyes in order to get another forty winks in before the household dissolved into chaos once again. It was usually once per year that it happened. Every single year, on the same day, his humans tended to descend into insanity. And today was that day.

As if on cue, he heard a loud shout coming from the floors above. It was the familiar sound of mother's voice, just at a far louder volume. If he were honest, it tended to get to that volume quite a lot when the children were home, but only occasionally when they were not. He wondered whether that was a coincidence or not.

Unfortunately, mother's shout was usually the sound that signalled the interruption of his peace and quiet. It was then that he heard the sound of muffled footsteps on the stairs and a few moments later the door to the kitchen swung open.

Mother came over and gave his feathers a soft stroke. He deigned to open one of his eyes at this point and cooed thankfully at her. With a smile, she grabbed her apron from the hook behind him, tied it around her waist, and walked over to the stove to prepare breakfast for the rest of the family.

He closed his eye again and attempted to sleep. Usually, he was rather good at sleeping through all of the noise. He had to be in this house. But today he was finding it incredibly hard. However, instead of letting his annoyance be known, he decided to continue to pretend to sleep.

It was then that he felt a flutter beside him. He opened his eyes and jumped back in alarm, giving a loud hoot. This caused him to fall from the perch, though he, fortunately, landed on a soft pillow on top of the chair.

The small, grey owl which had startled him hooted excitedly at him as he whizzed about the sky above. His fellow owl had landed so close to him that their faces were millimetres apart, which caused the scare. He turned his back on the offending creature and flew to the top of the china cabinet intending to get some peace.

It didn't work as the small owl merely followed him, hooting excitedly and buzzing around where he sat. Fortunately, it was then that mother intervened.

"Honestly, leave him alone! Go on! Shoo!" said mother, whacking a tea towel in the grey owls direction. "It's almost time to leave, now go upstairs and find my idiot son who should have shut you up by now."

The grey owl zoomed out of the window. He wasn't sure where he went but he wasn't too bothered either way.

"Good heavens! Look at the time!" said mother, clearly startled. She walked to the open kitchen door and leant out of it. "OI! YOU LOT! GET YOUR BACKSIDES DOWN HERE NOW AND EAT SOME BREAKFAST! WE HAVE TO LEAVE IN FORTY-FIVE MINUTES! HURRY UP!"

"ALRIGHT! WE HEARD YOU!" A voice came from upstairs.

"DON'T TAKE THAT TONE WITH ME!" Mother shouted back.

"DEAR, I DON'T THINK THIS IS HELPING," Father's voice from upstairs said.

"THEN TELL YOUR SON NOT TO HAVE SUCH CHEEK!"

"SON, DON'T BE CHEEKY TO YOUR MOTHER."

"I WASN'T! SHE'S THE ONE SHOUTING!" the original voice from upstairs shouted.

"OH, SHUT UP, MR. KEEPER," came sister's voice from upstairs.

"YOU SHUT UP YOU STUPID B-"

"DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT SENTENCE!" screamed mother.

"ALRIGHT, EVERYONE, WE'RE WASTING TIME. GET BACK TO PACKING AND THEN GET DOWNSTAIRS FOR SOME FOOD IN TEN MINUTES," father shouted.

"FINE!"

Mother turned back into the kitchen. Her face was bright red and she was breathing heavily with anger. She began to set the table and, on her way past, she threw a few treats up to him. It was then that the blonde woman entered the kitchen.

"Can I 'elp?" she asked mother.

"It's all practically done, but thank you," said mother, rather stiffly.

The blonde woman began prattling away until mother interrupted her again.

"Where's my eldest?"

"Well 'ee 'ad to go to work early," she said.

"I see," said mother.

The blonde woman launched into more speech and he found himself finally falling asleep to her voice. It was then that mother interrupted her again.

"Ah, there you are!" she said. "I'm glad as I wanted to explain about the security arrangements. There will be Auror's waiting for us at the station."

"Is the metamorphmagus going to be there?" the black-haired boy asked.

"She 'as let 'erself go, zat woman," said the blonde woman.

"Yes, thank you," said Mother. "Now, eat up and get on. I want us ready to go without the rush today."

It didn't take much longer for him to finally hear them all leave. He watched them through one eye as they all stood in front of the house with their trunks. Finally, some metal contraptions arrived and the entire family, including the grey owl, bundled into them and away they went. Now it was just him and the blonde woman.

She stood outside for a while longer, waving to them until they were out of sight. Then, she turned and walked back towards the house. As soon as he heard the door, he closed his eye immediately and then pretended to sleep. She seemed to just stand in the hallway for the moment before walking into the kitchen. The woman waved her wand and the dishes began to scrub themselves clean in the sink.

"Well," she said. "I theenk I shall go into ze village for a leettle bit."

He continued to pretend to be asleep, not acknowledging her presence. He felt her hands stroking his head. It felt wonderful.

"You are a seelly, leettle old man," she said with fondness. "I shall be back soon."

With that, she left the kitchen and went back upstairs. It was a few minutes later when he finally heard the front door open and shut again. He immediately opened his eyes and flew to the window. He watched the woman until she was out of sight. Finally, he was alone again.

He hooted with joy and did a small few loops around the kitchen which caused him to get winded. He rested for a few moments on the perch before getting a brilliant idea. He made his way into the living room and landed on top of the radio. Using his beak, he turned the radio on and began to turn the dial until he found his favourite channel. He turned the sound up to its max and waited for the next song to come on again.

"...Next, up on WRR fm, we have The Bandersnatch with 'Your Sister, The Banshee' – let's rock!"

The entire house began to shake to the rhythm of the song. He happily bobbed his head along to the music, loving the shrieks and rhythm of the beat. He loved being at home alone, as it was the only time he was able to do exactly what he wanted.

Several songs later, he knew it was time to turn the music off. The village wasn't that far away and he was sure that the blonde woman would be home at any moment. He switched off the music and made to leave the room but stopped in his tracks.

From the corner of his eye, he saw a discarded pillow on the floor. It was the same pillow that the grey owl tended to attack whenever he saw it. This gave him a brilliant idea. He attacked the pillow. He clawed at it, nipped it, even threw it around the room until, finally, it burst open and feathers and bits of fluff flew everywhere.

After admiring his work for a few moments, he flew back into the kitchen and resumed his original position atop the perch. Fortunately, he'd gotten back to his original place just in time as it was at that moment that he heard the front door go again. He continued to be asleep, not moving from his position. He heard whoever it was hang their coat up before entering the kitchen.

"Ah, you are still sleeping. I have made some wonderful purchases but now I theenk that I shall 'ave some tea."

He heard the blonde woman sit down in one of the chairs as she waited for her tea to finish brewing. After a few minutes, she stood up and made her way into the living room. There was a loud shriek which startled him and he opened his eyes, forgetting to pretend to sleep.

"That 'orrible, leettle owl," she said. The woman stormed into the kitchen, tea still in hand. "I cannot believe what that leettle, grey owl 'as done in ze living room. 'Ee 'as torn ze place apart! What a mess!"

She scowled for a moment before looking up at him again. She smiled and walked over, stroking him again on the head.

"You are a good, leetle owl. You would never do anything like this, I know. 'Ere is a leetle treat for you."

He hooted his thanks and took the treat without hesitation.

They will never know.