Olivia and Savina walked out of the station, Olivia adjusting her coat around her as she let out an angry breath. She took her purse from Savina, and slung it over her left shoulder since Savina was on her right. She dug into her coat pocket for her gloves, her breath still coming out in angry puffs, but hitched slightly, her step faltering ever-so-slightly when Savina slid her hand around her arm, right above her elbow, and rubbed it with her other hand.
"Hey, what did he say to you that rattled you this much?" she asked softly.
Olivia had only put the glove on her right hand, and opted out of putting it on the left, and instead, softly grabbed onto Savina's left hand that was now nestled in the crook of her elbow, as she put her right hand in her pocket. She liked the small touches Savina was allowing with time, and she would relish every second of them.
"Apparently, we didn't get a chance to talk yesterday." Olivia repeated his words, her frustration and anger still very much clear, but the simple gesture from Savina made a night-and-day difference with her.
"Really? Thought I made it pretty clear yesterday where he can put his opinions!" Savina retorted, and Olivia chuckled. "So what? He didn't like my answer, so he came to hear it from the ol….err…." she stammered, and Olivia pursed her lips in amusement at her, her smile finally reaching her eyes and giving them sort of a bemused gleam. "More experienced version!" Savina delightfully stated, and Olivia's chuckle turned into a throaty laugh.
"Smooth!" she complimented, chuckling at the cheeky smile Savina gave her in response.
"So, where are you taking me?" she asked.
"This diner around the corner. It's basically a cop's lounge, and they have pretty good burgers." Olivia replied. "But if you feel like something else, we can always go somewhere else." She added, but Savina shook her head.
"Burgers sound perfect."
They walked hand-in-hand towards the diner Olivia had been frequenting for quite a few years, Olivia relishing the normalcy of it all. She'd often fantasized about a moment like this; spending her lunch break with her daughter, as opposed to thinking about cases, every once in a while. But the reality of the situation would hit her as soon as her own anguished screams from that night echoed in her head. The pain was as raw as it was that night. And only Savina's presence seemed to soothe it bit by bit.
Olivia smiled when the barista did a double take when her eyes landed on Savina. "Wow, Olivia, the resemblance." she couldn't help but point out, and Olivia beamed at Savina, who smiled back at her.
"Hi, I'm Savina. The replica," she teased the barista, who chuckled.
"I'm Amy. Where have you been hiding?" she inquired jokingly, and Olivia wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. Savina's story was well known among law enforcement, and the legal system. But outside those two circles, Olivia hadn't quite realized that Savina's sudden presence would raise quite a number of eyebrows. And they had no idea how to get about to explaining what happened.
"Every seen Switched at Birth?" Savina asked Amy, who nodded at her, not quite sure how it related to the situation at hand. "Well, the other baby was a stillborn. Took me a while to make my way back." Savina elaborated softly, and Amy gawked at her.
"Welcome back." Amy said sincerely. "What can I get ya?" she asked.
Savina looked over at Olivia for suggestions, and a few moments later they'd placed their orders. Olivia pulled out her wallet, but Amy shook her head. "Not a chance. This one's on the house. A welcome back gift." She stated.
"Thank you." Both Bensons chorused.
They walked over to a table, and sat down facing each other.
"Can I ask you something?" Savina wondered.
"Anything." Olivia assured her.
"Is he um….my…. uh…." Savina stammered, not quite sure how to finish the sentence. She didn't really feel comfortable saying 'father' when Rafael was the one who bent over backwards to make a home for her, as opposed to that moron passing out judgements to satisfy his own ego.
Olivia, catching onto her drift, shook her head. "No, he's not. I had you before I joined SVU, and that's where Elliot and I partnered." She explained. "But I do know who your father is, Savina…." She started, but Savina shook her head and cut her off. "I'm not interested. It's just Rafael's disdain for Elliot is of mythical proportions, so it made me wonder."
Olivia chuckled. "Rafael hates him for how he made me feel when he left without any warning. It hit me hard." She explained.
"Did you….um…." Savina tried to find the words that wouldn't sound so blunt. And once again, Olivia caught on to what she was trying to say.
"I thought I did at the time. I think I viewed myself through his eyes, relied heavily on his approval. And I thought I meant more to him than that. The realization that I didn't hit hard. And Rafa was there for that." Olivia was honest with her answer. Savina deserved the truth. Had she been around she would've experienced it first hand, and the man did throw her in jail because he had no idea she existed. Least she could do was be honest about him.
"I thought Rafa came on as the ADA after Elliot was already gone for a couple of years." Savina was confused.
"His departure isn't what helped me see how little I meant to him. Him not reaching out after Lewis is what did." Olivia amended.
Savina nodded in understanding. "And Rafa was there for that?" it wasn't really a question, but Olivia nodded nonetheless.
"Did he know about me?" Savina wondered, her voice wasn't really accusatory, but inquisitive.
Olivia chuckled. "Yeah, I told him about a year ago." She recalled.
"That couldn't have been easy." Savina commented.
"He was the first one I told in three years." She recalled, and Savina frowned. "I told Finn a few months after Elliot left." She explained, and Savina nodded. "Noah is what brought it up with Rafa. I hadn't adopted him yet, I was fostering, and found out I may lose him," she started, her voice choking up at the memory. That was a dark day when Melinda showed up at her door with those damned DNA results. She guessed that they will have to eventually fill in Savina on Noah's history, but the conversation didn't need to turn to such dark talk. "I was scared of losing him, and it brought back losing you so I told him." She finished, her voice a bit choked up.
Savina reached for her hand across the table, and squeezed it. "Sorry, I didn't mean to."
"Oh no, sweetheart. It's your story, you deserve to know." Olivia assured her.
"I still do a double take when someone mentions Noah's adopted, he looks like the perfect mix between you and Rafael." Savina joked to lighten the mood, and Olivia chuckled.
"Yeah, and he just called him 'Papi' this morning." The comment slipped out of Olivia's mouth before her brain had a chance to filter it.
"Aw." Savina cooed. "Well, kid's not wrong. Rafael's clearly been there for him since you got him. But I'm guessing he still totally freaked out." She continued, as their orders were placed in front of them.
Olivia, grateful that Savina didn't seem to think much about the comment. "Yeah, he did." She affirmed, and they both chuckled, as Savina took a bite into her burger.
"Oh!" she moaned appreciatively over her mouthful. "This is magnificent." She praised, as other sounds of enjoyment escaped her.
Olivia smiled genuinely at her. "Glad you liked it." She said, just as she bit into hers.
"So, I kinda have a favor to ask." Savina confessed, as she swallowed. Olivia looked over at her encouragingly.
"Dr. Lindstrom wants to have a joint session with me and you," she started. "And he thinks it'll be a good idea if we have one before I start school again, but your schedule will of course be the deciding factor here."
"How about I give him a call and see if he has an availability at the end of the day today? I think I can slip out early tonight. Unless you're not up to having two sessions in one day?" Olivia suggested.
"No, I'm fine. I'm just not sure your insurance will be too thrilled with that." Savina countered, and Olivia put down her burger, and reached across for Savina's hand. "Savina, your recovery takes precedence over insurance, bureaucracy, red tape and whatever else you think I will let dictate how you want to handle this. Whatever healthy way you choose to help you deal and move on; I will always stand by it no matter what."
Her words were firm. Her voice gentle, and reassuring. Her soft brown eyes holding Savina's steady, and for the first time since they brought her home, the lingering doubt wasn't there. Just fear. Fear that Olivia couldn't quite place. It wasn't because of Freed. That fear was different; it looked different. This was something else.
Well, she guessed that it may be why Lindstrom wanted to talk to her about it.
About half an hour later, they were both done with their meal, and ordered a couple of milkshakes. Olivia fished out her phone, and quickly located Dr. Lindstrom's number. She pressed the call button, and put the phone to her ear.
"Now, let's see about that session." Olivia commented.
By the time the milkshakes arrived, Olivia had set the appointment.
"Can I go skate until the appointment?" Savina wondered, and Olivia nodded.
"You gonna go to the rink you met Noah at?" Olivia asked, and Savina nodded.
"Yeah, mind if I ask Lucy to bring Noah?" she inquired, and Olivia shook her head.
"I think he'll really like that."
Savina walked Olivia back to the precinct before she ordered an Uber and headed home.
Olivia walked into the bullpen apprehensively; she knew her squad would be out for lunch at that time, and was dreading that Elliot might still be lurking.
She breathed a sigh of relief when she found it empty. Just then her phone rang, and she saw Nick's number flashing on the screen. They hadn't talked since before she found Savina. She'd called him a couple of times to tell him, but they kept missing each other. She sighed as she picked up and braced herself for the conversation to come.
It was going to be a long day.