He liked her.

A lot.

There was no denying it now.

Not after he had found himself unable to sleep for three nights in a row, because a certain somebody had hijacked his brain. Not after that same somebody, though she was literally imprisoned on another planetary body 238,900 miles away, had infiltrated his thoughts for reasons he didn't even know.

No, no denying it at all.

He sighed a long, drawn out sigh, that was unfortunately more like a yawn, and swung his long, slender legs off the bed. He dragged his equally long and slender hands through his hair, making it more unkempt than it already was, and blearily looked around his room.

Quite a regal room it was. With majestic scarlet and gold drapes, intricately embroidered sheets, clothes studded with glimmering jewels strewn about and all the latest technology, it looked more like a prince's suite/lair than an 18 year old's room. But that was exactly what it was. His room frustrated him sometimes. For one, it suffocated him with memories of his recently late father who had originally occupied the room. The cleaners had done an immaculate job of reconfiguring the room for him, but he couldn't help but feel emotionally overwhelmed at times. More pressing, though, was the reminder of his the weight of his position.

Emperor of the Eastern Commonwealth.

Even as he thought about it now, waves of nausea at the implications of his position hot him, and he dug the heels of his hands onto his eyes. What he wouldn't give to be anyone else. To not have to wake up, if he slept at all, to a barrage of reports upon reports, requests upon requests. To not have to feel the pressure of an entire sixth of the globe on his just-grown shoulders. To not have to endure the shrill screams and swoons of the millions of girls who apparently all 'loved him to death'. And most of all, to not have to marry Levana.

This last one, really, was the one that got him almost hyperventilating every time. No matter how cool and collected he seemed about it to everyone else, only this room had seen the breakdowns he had about his critical and pathetic situation.

If he didnt marry her, she would wage war.

If he married her, he would be subjecting himself and all of Earth to all of Levana's wrath.

If he married her, he would lose her.

This last one was a thought he was just coming to terms with, and it was no doubt the most horrifying. He liked her.

Of course, it wasn't her that made the whole thing horrifying. Stars, no. It was actually far from it. The more he tried not to think about her, the more his thoughts strayed back to her. Even now, when he should have been thinking about all the Lunar ships directed at the Earth that had suddenly appeared just yesterday, he saw flashes of her in his mind. Her brown eyes. Her ever messy hair. The way she had fidgeted with those gloves of hers. He couldn't help himself- he smiled. Now that he thought about it, he didn't really know why he had been immediately attracted to her.

No, scratch that.

He did know. He thought back to how, even on that first day, when he had brought her Nainsi (was it really only a few weeks ago?), she hadn't acted flustered or tried to get his attention in any way. She had been respectful, of course, and surprised, but not in the way those other girls were. She had seemed flustered, but it didn't seem to be because he was the prince. Though she had rejected his tentative advances and concerns for some reason, she had still seemed as if she cared about what he said and not the mouth that said it. Seeing her on the floor in Dr. Erland's office had awoken something in him, something he had never felt for a girl before. And in the elevator- he had felt as if his heart was going to leap out of his chest from how close he had been to her. (She had again seemed flustered, but had not blushed for some reason.) Her eyes always seemed to convey a considerable amount of strength, though he could see an even greater amount of sadness behind it. He admired her boldness. Even though he had felt like she was hiding something from him every time he saw her, he frankly hadn't cared. She was normal, or at least as normal as people jailed up on the moon tended to be.

Oh, and she was beautiful. Stars.

And at the ball. She really had come. He had been staring at the entrance, barely glancing at the boring girls who attempted to make conversation with him, daring to hope that she had changed her mind and come. He had lost hope by that point, and had sadly resigned himself to the inevitable dance with the queen of Luna, when she had as-gracefully-as-she-could walked down the stairs, with what seemed to be a limp. He remembered being amused at her ragged (though pretty) dress and sodden gloves (that he had given her!), but had quite forgotten it, trying and failing to keep a giant, goofy, grin off of his face. They had danced, and it had been wonderful for as long as it had lasted.

But of course it didn't last long.

That night had been simultaneously the best and worst night of his entire life.

Best, because he had seen her, and danced with her, and talked to her, and was with her.

Worst, because of everything else.

NO, he thought, interrupting his own rambling thoughts. This is where everything goes screwy. Not now. He opened his eyes. Torin and the guards will be here any minute, and I don't want to mess up my entire day with all this extra nonsense. The Commonwealth and Levana first, here he gulped, and her later.

He knew this was bogus. He shakily guffawed at himself and shook his head as he stood up from his crouch and dressed for the day, barely bothering to wash his face, as he never ceased to look tired anyway. There was never one second he couldn't think about her. It was all a full circle, with her in the center. He just hadn't known exactly how much in the center she had always been, at the time. His old, unchanged self was so laughable that he couldn't laugh.

No matter how hard he tried, he would have to dwell on these thoughts, some pleasant and most not, at some point. He would just push the majority of it as far down as possible, so as not to let it plague him too much (though it still did). Tonight, then. During another sleepless night.

As he strode towards his door, he already heard footsteps approaching from the other side. He shook his head one last time before placing his hand on the doorknob.

Wherever and however you are, Cinder, my thoughts are with you.

A/N-

Well, this is my first fic for TLC. I'm not a fic-y type of person, but I REALLY can't wait for Winter, so here I am. I guess I really love Kaider, and I wanted to make an entire reflection-type fic from Kai's POV. I honestly don't know where to go with this, and I've never written romance before, but I'll give it a shot. It will definitely have another chapter, and I really want to have a Kaider kiss/comfort session, but I tend to stop writing after like 3 chapters, so I don't know. Let me know if it's good and if I should continue.

This chapter was supposed to be WAY longer, with all the 'worst' things listed and the rest of that day at the ball, but it's not all done (because I don't have the time to write.) I just really wanted to publish something, so I split it up. The rest will come later. I may edit things and move them around a bit later. Sorry if it's kind of rushed or awkward- I wrote this in about 45 minutes on my tablet.

Anywho- I don't like author's notes, so they won't really be there much after this. :) If at all anyone reads this, please let me know what you think- is it boring as I think it is? Should I keep writing TLC? Etc...

Please read, hopefully enjoy, and maybe review? :)