Co-written by amyboomerang. We had a lot of fun writing this so enjoy!
IT'S GOING TO KILL US!
GODS FORSAKE TEENAGE BOY
Son of chief abandoned by higher power
This morning, one Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III heroically rescued the town from the threat of the terrifying . deadly Night Fury, who would doubtlessly have slain them all. However, in a twist of fate, the Night Fury's body landed in an unknown region and the town, forsaking their savior, heaved insults upon him and have sent him home to remain "out of the way."
"Are you still reading that?" a deadpan voice interrupted Anger, causing him to crumple the paper in frustration.
"What? The gods hate us!" he bellowed at Disgust, who rolled her eyes.
"Now, now, guys, we'll find it!" Joy interrupted cheerfully. "We can't give up! We saw it go down! If we stop looking, someone else will find it and claim it as their own."
"Maybe they already have." Sadness droned. "We'll get home and Snotlout will have claimed all our glory. Then dad'll want him as a son more than ever."
"Don't think that way, we have to be optimistic!"
"Maybe he won't throw us off of Berk in exile, he'll just adopt us a brother. A big, stronger, better brother." Sadness fell down and buried her face in the floor.
"Ugh, maybe Anger is right, the gods must hate us." Disgust groaned as she took control of the console. "One location down, about a hundred to go. Not a hopeless mission at all."
"This is infuriating!" Anger spat, reaching out from under Disgust and pressing a button.
Everyone watched as Hiccup smacked a branch out of the way, only to have it rebound on his face.
"What did you do that for?" Fear wailed, grabbing Anger away from the controls. "You caused us bodily harm!"
"It was a branch! And it was in his way! And he needed catharsis!" Anger shouted, fighting against Fear's long arms.
"Here we go again." Disgust mumbled. "It's always catharsis with you."
"Omigosh look! There's a track! It looks like something landed here!" Joy hopped up and down and pointed through Hiccup's vision. "We did it! We found it!"
"But what if the ropes snapped? What if it's just waiting to dismember us?" Fear squeaked.
"Oh come on, it fell hundreds of feet and crashed into the ground. Every bone in its body was probably crushed." Disgust made a face. "Ugh, gross, it's probably bleed all over the place."
"Cool, can I see?" Anger shoved his way in front of Disgust to get a better look.
"We haven't even seen it yet, guys. It probably isn't even there." Sadness moaned, slightly muffled by the floor.
"Ahh come on, it's fine, what could possibly- OH MY GODS IT'S RIGHT THERE!" Joy screamed as the long black body of the dragon came into view.
Fear dived over her and adjusted several knobs. "Okay, I don't think it saw us! Let's just crawl away really slowly and call it a day!"
"But we have to prove to Dad that we shot it down!" Joy insisted. "Come on, it's probably dead! Let's take a closer look."
"Even if it isn't dead, I'll show it what a Viking can do!" Anger rubbed his hands together and grinned maliciously.
"This changes everything!" Joy squealed excitedly. "We've taken down this mighty beast!"
"AH! IT MOVED!" Fear shrieked, taking the helm once more. "IT'S ALIVE!"
"I knew we didn't kill it. It would have been too easy. And nothing works out that easily." Sadness wailed, finally standing up to get a good look at the fallen dragon.
"No, it's fine!" Joy said, his voice brimming with false confidence. "We can turn this around."
"It looks really hurt." Sadness moaned. "Why did we do this?"
Anger pushed Fear out of the way to control the console once more. "All right, guys, let's do this. We are a Viking! On 3, 1..."
"Look how sad it is." Sadness observed morosely.
"2…"
"Aww it's kinda cute." Joy said, his eyes widening.
"3!"
"NO!" Joy and Sadness shouted in unison, knocking Anger out of the way.
"What did you do that for? You stole our glory!" Anger bellowed.
"Are you crazy, that thing will kill us!" Fear shouted.
"Maybe we can be friends! We've never had a friend before." Joy leaned forward to get a better look. "I dunno, I look at it and I see… us. You know?"
There was a long pause as every emotion turned to look at Joy.
"No, I don't know what you mean! I'm too busy trying to keep us from getting killed!" Fear lunged for the console.
"I wanna kill it!" Anger argued.
"Well I don't want blood all over our clothes!" Disgust protested. "You know Dad doesn't do the laundry, we do!"
"It'll be a badge of honor!" Anger argued back.
"Uhh guys…" Sadness said, motioning for them to pay attention to the console.
"And that badge will smell and stain the clothes and then there's also us carrying a bleeding, gross heart all the way into the village!"
"Good point, let's take the head!"
"Guys…"
"You're looking at this the wrong way, we need to run away!"
"Guys, you should really take a look at what Joy's doing!"
"In a minute, Sadness, I need to set my friends here straight."
"Uhh okay but I he's cutting through the last rope." Sadness pointed to the screen.
There was a potent silence as the last rope snapped.
"What did you DO?" Fear yelled in terror. "We're gonna die!"
"I just wanted to give it a peace offering, you know!" Joy defended his decision as Fear ripped him away from the panel.
"It's on top of us!" Fear screamed. "OH GODS IT'S OPENING ITS MOUTH! IT'S GOING TO BITE OUR HEADS OFF!"
"Yeah, nice going, Joy." Disgust grumbled. "You got us all killed. Best day ever."
"Dad's gonna find our mangled body in the woods." Sadness collapsed again. "At least it'll save Dad the trouble of exiling us. And he won't have to be so ashamed all the time."
Joy opened his mouth to respond when a sound entered headquarters, a sound so loud the whole place vibrated. Everyone stared into the dragon's throat before it scampered off, flying at an odd angle. There was a long pause as everyone stared at the empty woods.
"Great." Said Disgust. "Now we're deaf. Thanks a lot, Joy."
"Let's go tell Dad!" Anger shoved his way to the console.
"No, let's go look at it!" Joy pushed him aside.
"Let's lie down for a bit and wallow." Sadness suggested.
"EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN!" Fear bellowed before slamming his hand on a large red button on the side of the console.
Everything went dark. There was absolute silence for several seconds until Sadness spoke up.
"Good idea. At least it won't have to chase us down when it finally gets hungry."
"Oh no, what have I done?" Fear howled. "We're a sitting duck! That dragon could do anything to us!"
"But it didn't kill us!" Joy threw out his arms to try to keep the peace. "Don't you see? It let us go! Everything we've been taught is wrong!"
"Look, just because one dragon did it doesn't mean all dragons will!" Fear reminded her.
"Or maybe we're so small and scrawny, it didn't see us as a proper meal." Disgust added.
"How do we turn him back on?" Fear was still pounding on the buttons to no avail.
"Wait, a core memory!" Joy shouted, pointing to the glowing memory coming down the channel next to the screen.
All five emotions watched as a purple core memory fastened itself to the pedestal. Through the window, they could see the memory creating a new island. An island in the shape of the dragon.
"Dragon Island?" Disgust huffed. "Great. An island sure to get us killed."
"I don't think so." Joy said thoughtfully. "Maybe not. I mean, it could be the beginning of a new adventure. Maybe something that will change the world!"
"Yeah right." Anger grumbled. "More like something that'll really tick Dad off."
"He's gonna disown us now." Sadness moaned.
"Not if we play this right. Let's come back tomorrow. See if we can find it again!" Joy exclaimed gleefully. "Ah, this is so exciting!"
"I think he's coming to." Fear said, sighing in relief. "And no dragon in sight. Let's get home!"
"Should we tell Dad?" Joy asked him.
"Well, that would be the honest thing to do." Fear said, not sounding very convinced.
"Let's hold out for a bit." Said Joy. "And hey, at least Dad's not going to put us in dragon training or anything?"
They all laughed (except for Sadness, of course) as Disgust added. "Yeah, good thing. Otherwise we'd be really screwed.
Hope you enjoyed and we look forward to writing some more!
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~KateMarie999