'Cause I can't keep sleepin' in your bed
if you keep messin' with my head.

Before I slip under your sheets,
can you give me somethin' please?

I can't keep touchin' you like this
if it's just temporary bliss.

"You're what?"

"You heard me," Renji said wearily, but seriously, shouldering his backpack and carrying a duffel-bag. This had escalated quickly.

"Wh- B-" Ichigo sputtered, hand on his forehead. It had all gone so wrong. He'd been planning on staying up so that he could apologize when Renji came back, but he'd waited and waited, and before he'd known it, it was four o' clock in the morning and it had started and stopped raining twice. He just hadn't been able to keep his eyes open, and when he'd finally woken up, it was noon, and Renji's bedroom door was shut.

When Renji had come out, he'd been packing up his things. All his things.

"What the fuck, man? Don't move out!" Ichigo said in dismay, feeling bad all over. He'd crossed some invisible line and he'd wounded Renji's spirit, he knew he had. Renji was the type of guy to shake things off, so if he was this upset, Ichigo had really messed up. He didn't know how to begin to apologize, but he had to do something. 'Sorry' was a start, but that was always too difficult.

Renji gave a sigh and put two fingers to his left temple, tossing his extra sneakers into his duffel-bag. "I can't be here right now, man." He made it sound like he might come back sometime, but when and would he? Damn, Ichigo had really fucked up, hadn't he? Renji was leaving, Renji thought he had to leave.

Ichigo bit his lip. "Because of me?"

Renji looked up at him, brows scrunching up in hurt. "Ichigo," he said lowly, tone deeply wounded, and it made Ichigo visibly cringe. "What you said was messed up."

Ichigo looked at the floor, mumbling, "I know."

Renji sighed. "It hurt... Whatever, I dunno'," he said, shaking his head and rolling his eyes. "Geez."

"I didn't mean it."

"Whatever."

"Renji, I didn't mean it," Ichigo repeated, voice strained as he tried to get Renji to meet his eyes.

"I said, whatever," Renji said aggressively, zipping up his gym bag, crossing his arms.

"I didn't mean what I said about my mom, or thinking we're gross, or that you're gonna' ruin my future. I was just runnin' my mouth - I didn't mean that shit," Ichigo said, biting his lip, brows scrunching.

"It's not about-" Renji snapped, cutting himself off and taking a soothing breath, calming himself down. "It's not about that. It's not about what you said, it's about what you admitted to me. It's about that this entire time, you've been pulling some sick joke on me. You've been sleeping with me on false pretenses and ya' let me think that-" Renji became so angry that he couldn't speak anymore, the fury soon slipping out of him and leaving him calm and determined.

"What you said was fucked up, Ichigo, and yer' not gonna' keep saying fucked up shit to me anymore. I'm mad at you," Renji said with a flat look. Ichigo could see right then that he'd really betrayed Renji, that Renji had trusted him and Ichigo had broken that and that it had cut him deep. His head went down immediately with shame.

"Sorry," Ichigo said, coughing, and then saying it again louder, peeking one eye up for a reaction. Renji was unmoved. "I know it was really lame and stupid, but you don't have to leave, though."

Renji visibly grit his teeth, jaw clenching as he tried to gather patience. When his words came out, they were short and sharp, causing Ichigo to take a step back, fists balling up. "I have to get outta' here. I can't take this, Ichigo, do you understand? I - cannot - take - this," Renji said in exasperation, eyes slightly crazed as he bared his teeth. All Ichigo could see and hear from him was pain.

"Did you think I was just gonna' bounce back? That was fucked up, what you said! I can brush off a lotta' shit, but that hurt!" Renji said, brow clenching, "I don't even wanna' look at your face right now!"

Ichigo's heart began to hurt conspicuously, and that's how he noticed that it was there again. He hadn't been able to feel anything ever since that heart pain stopped when he'd lost his virginity, but now he felt it again. It hurt, it really really hurt. Ichigo hadn't known what he'd wanted, but it was never for Renji to move out.

Seeing that he'd hurt Renji this bad just because he hadn't been able to feel something intense and obvious, Ichigo felt ashamed of himself. It was like he couldn't accept simple happiness, and if he got it, there had to be a hell of a fight first.

With Renji so hurt in front of him, because of what he'd said, all that was left in Ichigo now was regret. No matter how confused and defensive he'd gotten, he should've just fucking dealt with it like a grown up.

"You want me, or you seem to, but then you go and say shit like that! You don't just get to say you don't mean it, because you said it and now it's out there. Even if you didn't mean it, you still said it to me and I had to hear it," Renji growled like a wounded animal, voice cracking. Ichigo's gut clenched up. He kept feeling worse and worse with each thing Renji said.

"You're fucking with my head and it's screwing me up," Renji said, voice strained and tight. "Maybe you thought I could just take it and take it forever, but you're screwing me up and I can't just fucking shake it off. I've gotta' get out of here, okay? I don't know what you want, and I can't deal with this constant…" Renji's angry expression broke into something sad and lonely then, causing Ichigo's heart to just bleed like a wet sponge being squeezed.

"Constant disappointment," Renji finished, and Ichigo held his stomach, swallowing, before glaring. Anger he could understand, but he couldn't handle guilt. He didn't hurt his friends often, and when he did, he always knew how to fix it. But he didn't this time, and he had to get rid of this shame somehow. Fury was the way to go. Shift the blame, shift the blame back to Renji. He was the cause of this whole mess. Fuck him for playing the victim when he was the reason this all had happened. If Renji hadn't pressured him with his weird gayness, then Ichigo could've just stuck with his normal life. It was Renji's own fault that he was hurting.

"You're mad I won't sleep with you again, is that it?" Ichigo grit out. Renji's eyes snapped to his, and immediately he knew he'd definitely crossed the line. He'd flicked a tiger in the nose one too many times, and it was finally going to lunge.

"See that, right there?" Renji began, voice deadly as he referenced Ichigo's attitude. "Fuck you!"

"…" Ichigo couldn't say anything for a minute, just watching as Renji's muscles coiled up, tense and bulging as he dropped his bags on the floor and grabbed Ichigo's t-shirt, yanking him in close to his face.

"I've accepted that you were using my body this whole time when we were in bed," Renji snarled, "but if you think that means you can somehow jilt me whenever it's convenient for you or make me seem like I'm the big bad guy who's seducing you, you are so wrong." Renji was right in his face, and Ichigo was flinching back with each word. Renji was biting like a wounded animal. "I'm not playin' this game, Ichigo. You wanna' keep acting like the victim and yanking me around, but I won't let you," he spat, nose an inch from Ichigo's, and for the first time in his life, Ichigo felt truly threatened by Renji. They'd been in fights before, but never something so serious that would end up with either of them in the hospital. Then again, he'd never kicked Renji in his sore spot - his big soft heart.

"You wanna' just use me as your dildo or something and then when I try to treat you right or take you on a date, you turn it around and say I'm corrupting you or some shit, like I'm trying to ruin you or expose everything we do to the world." Renji shook him once and threw him away from him, causing Ichigo to almost fall onto the hard-wood floor.

"Maybe you think that things are the same for me, but when I told you I loved you, I meant it, and I thought you felt the same way. You led me on and let me believe that you cared about me!" Ichigo swallowed, seriously starting to think that Renji was nearing tears. He knew that he'd hit Renji close to home, because if Renji was starting to talk like this, then things were really bad. Renji considered him pretty much the only bit of real family he had besides Rukia, and if Renji believed that all along Ichigo never had cared at all, it must feel like his heart had been ripped out.

Ichigo had never wanted... never wanted to break a heart.

"I thought we were lovers, I thought we were making love, and I was feeling so great, but really, none of that was true! I know how it's like to get used for my body, Ichigo, you know that, and you still do this to me!" Renji screamed. "You were going to bed with me and the whole time, you're thinking I'm just some sicko out to ruin your life! You're thinking that about me while I'm inside you!" Ichigo coughed awkwardly, looking at the ground as Renji ranted.

"I'm thinking about how much I love you and that I want to make you feel like you're really important, but on your side, I'm just your closet-gay science-experiment," Renji spat bitterly, gritting his knuckles into his eye sockets and digging hard to push away tears. "You're ashamed of me and you think what we have is disgusting. I thought we had a relationship and that you just wanted to keep things private, but no. You think it's something perverted and twisted and wrong, and you made me a part of that. That's what you thought about while I was doing it with you! You went to bed with me when you felt that way! I feel filthy, Ichigo. I feel like a sicko now! Thanks a lot!"

Ichigo swallowed hard. Hearing Renji so close to crying like that was doing something to him.

"And now you're telling me to stay, as if you care!" Renji wailed, groaning deeply and clawing at his own face. He let out a low moan and a small sigh. "You keep going back and forth, thinking I can take this cruelty forever, like I can just deal with it and handle the pain, but I don't work like that. I'm not a machine, and I can't keep dealing with your mistakes, because every time you change your mind, it's just a little thing to you, but it's a fucking big thing to me! The stuff you say matters to me! Maybe you don't think about what you're saying, but I fucking hear that and I remember it!" Renji howled, "You're the sicko, not me, doing this shit to my heart! You think it's funny, don't you, but it's fucking not!"

Ichigo shook his head breathlessly, stunned, speechless.

"You can't play with my heart like that, you can't do that! Are you just fucked up inside?! You don't care?! So many people love you and you don't even notice! You hurt them all the time without knowing! When are you gonna' learn that when you do shit like this, it affects other people?! Like ME!" he roared, kicking Ichigo hard and hitting him in the shoulder. Ichigo ducked, backing away, and Renji stood there panting.

"Are you just trying to mess with me?! First, you don't want me, then you do, then you have me, then you start treating me like shit. What do you fucking want from me?!" Renji screamed, face twisting with sorrow. Ichigo finally cracked.

"I don't know!" Ichigo finally hollered back, half-bending over from the force. Renji was silent for a moment, before shaking his head with a sigh.

"Wow, man… 'You don't know?' How can I know, but you not know?" Renji said incredulously. "Maybe you didn't realize, but I noticed all those times when I saw you looking at me. Before all of this, I knew you felt something. Or I thought you did," Renji said, lip curling. "You looked at me a lot, so it had to be something. I thought that you were probably just shy or making absolutely sure that you wouldn't end up hurting me, because you know how fucked up my past is. I thought you were making sure I wouldn't hurt you. I thought you were just shy!"

Ichigo grit his teeth.

"I thought you were the type of guy who would think things through and know for sure about their decision when they lost their virginity. I trusted that you were sure," Renji said sternly, glaring. "Do you think I would've been your first time if I'd known you were having second thoughts?!" Renji yelled, tearing at his hair. Obviously all of this had really done something to his head and his own view of himself.

"I thought I knew, but now I'm confused, okay?!" Ichigo wailed defensively, face a mask of despair. He'd tried to be angry, but it wasn't working now, because hearing all that had set in stone for him that he was to blame here. He knew he'd screwed up, that all of this was his fault. He'd done all this because he'd wanted to feel in control of his feelings, of what was going on between them, but now it was like everything was falling apart and it felt awful.

"I'm sorry! I dunno' what's wrong with me! I don't know what to do!" Ichigo admitted, holding up his hand, fingers clawed. Renji gave a sigh, smiling bitterly.

"I know," Renji said, considerably calmer, more sinister. "I knew you didn't, so I asked you out, didn't I?" Ichigo nodded, rubbing his arm and looking off to the side. "And what did you do? You turned me down, but then made doey eyes at me for another month. I didn't know what you were waiting for, but I knew you needed another push."

Ichigo thought about it, remembering those times when he'd been a little too obvious in watching Renji brush his hair or get out of the shower. Renji had obviously noticed, because he'd come up with this plan to ask him out. He'd sat him down on the couch and turned towards him, his hand coming towards his face, and told him that he'd like to take him on a date. Ichigo hadn't known what to say for a minute, but when Renji had tried to kiss him, he'd stood bolt-upright, backing away. He hadn't said, 'gross', he hadn't called Renji a 'fag', all he'd said was 'no, I don't want that'.

Was it any wonder that when he'd kept checking Renji out, Renji had made the connection that maybe he only wanted to keep it casual?

Renji went on then, eyes drifting off. "So I finally made a move again, and you seem to go along with it and we fool around. You reveal that you were mad that I was trying to 'get in your pants'. I tell you that I love you, and you seemed happy about it, so we sleep together. I'm thinking that I have a good thing going," Renji said wistfully, bitterness in his voice, "Like I've made it, you know? I think that we're together, and that we love each other! But then when I try to treat you nice like I thought you wanted, it turns out nothing has changed and you don't want me after all. All you wanted was to lose your virginity. You don't want a relationship with me. You're the one who didn't want friends with benefits from me, but that's exactly what you're doing!"

Ichigo tried to interrupt, but Renji just pointed in his face, volume increasing. "You don't want to go on a date with me, you don't want me to hug you, you don't even want to hang out with me anymore! You just can't fucking stand to be around me, man! I don't know what the fuck to do here, what the hell do you want me to do, Ichigo? What the hell do you want?!" he asked, voice wrenched, expression absolutely wretched. "Tell me! I'm trying so fucking hard!" his voice cracked inconveniently as he shook his head and stared at the wall. He got in his face then, aggressive and handsy.

"You really just want my body, then, is that it? Cause' I know you check me out. You want this, but not this," he said, gesturing to his dick but then his heart. "You want me to pine for you, but do it at a distance and wait the rest of my life for nothing, so that I'm an open untouched option that you have, but'll never take? You want me only when it's convenient for you, and I'd better shut up about it too, or you'll shut me out? You're gonna' be kind ta' me and let me in with no intention ta' keep me?" Ichigo's eyes widened as he realized that that had been exactly what he'd been doing.

"You can't do that to me! I won't let you!" Renji shouted.

"You don't know what it's like, okay?!" Ichigo finally yelled back, pushing Renji away, vicious and pained.

"Oh," Renji said sarcastically, "Enlighten me, oh great king of heartbreak. What knowledge could you possibly impart upon me? Are you fucking kidding? You're trying to turn this around again, aren't you. What the fuck is your problem?" Renji snapped. "Is your head broken? You just don't know how to treat people right?"

"I'm trying to explain, just lemme' talk!" Ichigo hollered. "You're older than me, you have experience, you… I've never even dated before, Renji! I wasn't… I wasn't ready for this!" Renji blinked, lips parting, but he paused, whatever words he'd been about to say dying in his throat. "You made me feel like I had to!" Ichigo accused, pointing in his face.

Renji's face went slack for a moment, stunned, and then he got aggressive, towering over him, growling in his face, "I did not rape you! Don't you dare start saying that!"

Ichigo felt exhausted then, so emotionally confused that it actually hurt. He didn't want Renji to leave, he didn't want to have this conversation, but… Maybe he should be honest, but less cruelly. "That's not what I'm saying," he said quietly, and Renji backed off, realizing that he'd have to calm down to be able to hear anything Ichigo was saying. "I mean… I don't know if I… if I wanna' come out, you know?" Ichigo said, cringing, and Renji's face softened.

"I'm confused," Ichigo admitted, looking at his hands and shaking his head, "I mean, am I gay now? Is that it? Was I straight before this, or was I gay in the first place? I mean, it's confusing to feel all this messed up shit for you, and I'm… having a hard time dealing with it. I've never even dated before you and I'm just fucking things up all over the place. I don't know how I'm supposed to feel, or if what I'm doing is right, or if I even feel anything at all. Have I… Have I just known you too long for there to be butterflies, or am I just broken?" Ichigo asked, voice cracking a little. Renji listened on, expression stony and resigned, but his eyes seemed sympathetic and a touch regretful.

"I don't know what it is yet, okay? Is that so wrong?" Ichigo asked, a hand to his forehead. "It's… it's going too fast, and sometimes when you're being all lovey on me," he said, voice going sour, "it's overwhelming and I need air. It's just a lot simpler for me to push it away and blame you, so that I don't have to look inside myself and see that it'd be easy for you to hurt me if you wanted." Renji's frame stuttered a little, as if he'd been planning on nodding, but cut himself off.

"I don't think what we have is gross. I don't think it's disgusting, and I know I said it, but I don't mean it. It feels right when it's happening, but I get freaked out afterwards, okay? Maybe some part of me is still that 'don't touch me, fag' boy deep down. I don't wanna' be that person, but I don't know if I wanna' be the guy who sticks his ass in the air for you either…" Ichigo looked back into Renji's eyes, cheeks pink. "I mean… how would people think of me if they knew that? I don't even know how you think of me, knowing I give in like that."

Ichigo took a breath, shaking his head. "It seems simple when you do it, I mean, you're way more in control of your body and you're smooth and you're confident about yourself, but I don't feel that way when it comes to this stuff. You don't understand. I feel like everyone's watching me and it drives me crazy."

Renji pursed his lips.

"You don't know what it's like. It's not easy for me, okay?" Ichigo protested, voice becoming a whine, "I know I'm a young guy and I should be all over this, but… it's too fast," he said on a breath. "It's just too fast, and I don't want people to know yet. You don't get it. You've got things all figured out already, but I don't. I'm not used to the idea of it yet… you… you feeling that way," Ichigo said, looking to the side.

"Loving you," Renji interjected softly, punctuating it with a pointed stare, as if to say, 'you're not talking your way around this.' Ichigo pursed his lips.

"…"

"I love you," Renji said, reaching out and touching Ichigo's wrist, and as Ichigo slowly looked up, he could see that Renji had seventy percent forgiven him. He still cringed at those words. Couldn't Renji keep those words inside? "There's nothing wrong about that," Renji said firmly, and Ichigo felt distinctly ashamed of himself, because Renji was right. Love wasn't something that should have to be hidden, and the more Ichigo acted like it was, the more he started actually feeling that way, which was screwed up.

"Do you think there's something wrong with it?" Renji challenged, and Ichigo took a deep breath.

"No," he said, extremely reluctantly.

"Then there's nothing in the way, Ichigo. They might seem like big problems to you now, but you'll work them out with time, I promise," Renji assured. "I mean, if… if what you're saying is true… and that's why you did that stuff, then, maybe I…" He looked to his stuff, which was still strewn on the floor from when he'd dropped it to manhandle Ichigo.

Renji was about to forgive him. Ichigo seized onto that moment with fierce hope. He was getting another chance.

"Don't run off," Ichigo interrupted, hands fisting in Renji's shirt on either side of his collar. "I don't know how I feel yet, but I don't want you to go, and… I just… Don't leave because of me," he said. "I'm sorry for what I said. I won't do that again. I shoulda' just said that I wanted a little space or somethin'. I think… I didn't know if you'd back off, so I tried to make you, but… that wasn't fair of me to do. Sorry I hurt your feelings," he mumbled, red-faced. "Just… I don't wanna' kiss and touch all the time, okay? It doesn't mean I'm mad at you."

Ichigo bit his lip, "I didn't mean to make you think I don't care… If it puts you at ease, if you were to just leave suddenly, I'd never forgive you."

Renji was quiet for a minute. Ichigo suddenly became anxious and jumpy.

"I mean- Somehow that ended up sounding really stalkerish, but that's not what I meant. Just… It'd be stupid to break up so soon, right?" Renji didn't respond, and Ichigo went on, sighing. "I know I'm probably annoying and I'm no good in bed, and I've got a short-temper and keep picking fights. On top of it, I did some really bad things, so I get why you wanna' go…"

Ichigo scratched the back of his neck, looking down, "Ah shit. I dunno' what I'm saying."

Renji nodded, a hand coming up and rubbing through Ichigo's hair. Ichigo let him for a minute, before shaking his head wildly, knocking his fingers out. Renji grinned a little. "Okay… I think I understand… I didn't realize that… that maybe even if I didn't coerce you into having sex, you still felt pressured or something. Maybe I made you feel cornered when we were all out with our friends, but I don't want you to be afraid that I'll rat you out. We don't have to tell anyone. I'll be really patient." He smiled wider, and Ichigo looked up into his face. "If that's what it takes, then fine." Ichigo had to pause. It had been that easy?

Fuck, it was because Renji really loved him. His stomach clenched with guilt.

"I wasn't in this for sex in the first place, so… I mean, it probably seemed like that to you initially, but I was just messing with you. I want a relationship, and we don't have to have sex, alright? I mean, sure, you're pretty good-looking, kid, but I've gone through some pretty long droughts. Even if you don't wanna' do it ever again, if it makes you uncomfortable, if you realize you're ace, I mean, that's fine, I'd support you," Renji said, and Ichigo suddenly realized that they'd confused their intentions. He'd wanted a break from the lovey-stuff, not from fucking, but Renji seemed to be unable to differentiate the two. Oh right, fuck, he was in love with him. Damnit. Ichigo scowled.

Renji had been genuinely hurt by all that messed up shit he'd said - and that in itself took a lot, since Renji had thick skin - and yet he'd taken Ichigo at his word and forgiven him and taken him back with little to no question, trusting that what Ichigo said, he meant. It was a lot to live up to.

"Just as long as… we're cool," Renji said uncertainly. Ichigo nodded.

"Okay then… I can have some personal space, then?" he asked, and Renji nodded. Desperate to save the sex life that he'd only attained a short time ago, Ichigo added on, "I mean, it doesn't have to stop completely, I just… I get scared, man. I gotta' breathe," he said in embarrassment. "What I'm most worried about is every one finding out about this before I can fully process it, and then having them influencing my opinion. I just want this to stay private, okay? I need some space and thinking time."

"Nah, I get it," Renji said, seeming like his normal self again. Ichigo smiled a little; he'd been forgiven all the way. "I get it," Renji repeated, "I thought you were just shy, but no, I get it. It's a big deal to you, so it is to me too. We can keep it private. Still, ya' shoulda' just told me that from the beginning. I would've taken you seriously." Ichigo nodded, and Renji gave a little smirk, "But whatever, you need some time, and that's fine. Glad I don't gotta' sleep in an alley, at least."

Ichigo gave him a weird look, laughing once. "I thought you were going to Rukia's." Renji shrugged, hands in the air in an 'I dunno' gesture.

"Tch, yeah, except Rukia's is also Mr. Kuchiki's now."

"Ohhh," Ichigo said in recognition, glad that things were pretty much back to normal now. Renji grinned and put his stuff away again, and then dove on him on the couch when Ichigo said they should kiss and make up.

"Mmmm," Renji hummed, tongue wrapping around Ichigo's as he held him in his arms. Something rose up in Ichigo's throat that reminded him of tears, but it was just… happiness, even though the contact still made him itch with anxiety. They kissed for a few minutes, but after that, Renji didn't touch him at all, sitting a short ways away on the couch and watching Wipe Out.

He'd gotten what he wanted again. Renji had backed off, was going to give him time, and he didn't have to worry about their friends finding out. Ichigo should be happy, but to be honest, he suddenly felt cold without that previously annoying arm around his shoulders.

Fuck, he was so messed up.

And it's killin' me when you're away, I wanna leave and I wanna stay.
And I'm so confused, So hard to choose.
Between the pleasure and the pain.
And I know it's wrong, and I know it's right.
Even if I try to win the fight, my heart would overrule my mind.
And I'm not strong enough to stay away

Ikkaku had never cleaned his apartment so well as he had today. He'd freaking vacuumed. Hah! He never vacuums!

He'd put all his clothes away after taking them to the coin-op, all the dishes were done and put away, his bedsheets were freshly laundered and smelled great. They had to if Yumichika was going to lay on them later. Ugh, he wondered if he could convince Yumichika to trade a pillowcase with him so he could smell his perfume at night. He wondered if they could just take a nap in his bed or something and cuddle sometime. Frick, he was excited.

He'd brought Yumichika over for the first time, and unsurprisingly, Yumichika told him it was a dump, which of course wasn't true. Little shit.

Ikkaku had made Yumichika dinner, romanced him while they'd ate, and then microwaved him some popcorn and wrapped him in a blanket on the couch. Now they were cuddling together and watching TV. All of that should've made Ikkaku really happy, but it was absolutely infuriating. He was finally aroused, and it was really not the right time. He didn't even know why it had happened, but it had just come back all of a sudden once he'd started holding Yumichika.

Yumichika nestled closer in his arms, and Ikkaku held him fiercely, growling lowly at himself. He couldn't bring himself to make a move. Surely Yumichika still wanted to go to bed with him, right? He was ready now, but he couldn't make himself break the peaceful moment, because it wasn't the same as Yumichika inviting him in at night. They were having a causal movie date and were cuddling, and it'd be out of place for Ikkaku to just be like, 'bam, let's make love. Right here. On the floor. In the middle of the film.'

Geez, but he wanted to so bad. He didn't want to pass up the chance again.

He had to just go for it. He was hyping himself up too much. It'd be simple. Yumichika had offered himself up before, so there was little chance he'd slap him or call him 'pervert'. He had to just do it. It wouldn't be hard, all he had to do was reach out.

It was right there. It was right THERE. Finally, Ikkaku's hands moved.

'Yes… yes, you're doing it,' some encouraging inner voice chanted as Ikkaku's hand snaked closer and closer over Yumichika's thigh. "Yes, almost there…'

Mistaking his intentions, probably seeing his conflict and thinking he'd just been trying to get up the courage to hold his hand, Yumichika's hand reached out for his and interlaced their fingers. Ikkaku sat there for a moment, realizing his groping plans had been jacked. Yumichika leaned up to him for a kiss, which Ikkaku returned in confusion.

"You're just the worst," Yumichika said, pressed against him, "but I really really like you."

Ikkaku's heart burst, buzzing warmly in his chest as his body just melted into the couch. To his dismay, his erection was steadily dying as Yumichika kissed him sweetly and held his face.

It was a fuzzy love feeling, but it wasn't the buzz that he was looking for. He looked down at the crotch of his pants, back to Yumichika's face, back down…

Aw fuck.

And love…
Such a silly game we play, oh,
like a summer's day in May.
What is love, what is love?
I just want it to be love,
oooh~

~Fin~

CN - Do you feel disappointed and let down by those endings? You're meant to. Prepare for the emotionally-fulfilling sequel, Steamed, where everyone stops acting completely stupid.

Opening 1 - The Calculation by Regina Spektor
Closing 1 - I Don't Care Much by Emilie Autumn

Opening 2 - Show Me Love by t.A.t.u.
Closing 2 - Pumpkin Soup by Kate Nash

Opening 3 - Drumming Song by Florence + The Machine
Closing 3 - Too Close by Alex Clare

Opening 4 - I Miss the Misery by Halestorm
Interlude 4 - Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Closing 4 - Reasons by She Wants Revenge

Opening 5 - Temporary Bliss by The Cab
Interlude 5 - Not Strong Enough by Apocalyptica
Closing 5 - Love by Matt White