They left the temple shortly after that, heading home to continue their traditional New Year's celebration. Eijun and Kazuya walked slowly, falling behind the rest of the family. Kazuya had Eijun's hand in his and they were chatting, flirting and bickering, as usual.

"Ei, are we staying up until dawn?"

"I thought we might, if you'd like."

"I would."

"Ok, then. Let's go to that park that's up the hill to watch. That way we'll be above the town and have a clear view of the sunrise. I don't think a lot of people go there." Kazuya nodded.

"Sure thing."

That piece of business concluded, they walked in silence, Eijun planning and Kazuya getting nervous. What am I going to do if he hates his gift? He could so easily get mad at me, and I wouldn't blame him...I guess I just need to trust him once more, trust him to understand what it is I'm telling him.

When they arrived at the house, they shed their outerwear quickly, and went to join the others near the tree. Chika walked in with tea for everyone and the gifting began. There were a lot of presents under the tree for everyone, including Kazuya. Eijun got clothes and a new mp3 player; Kazuya also got clothes, but they'd gotten him the headphones that he'd wanted to buy. He thanked them all with tears in his eyes, and smacked Eijun, knowing that he was the one who'd told them what he wanted.

Then it came time for the boys to distribute their gifts; Eijun gave his grandfather DVDs of his favorite historical drama; to his father, he gave a bootleg Beatles album he'd found online, and for his mother he'd gotten a gift card to her favorite online store. He knew it wasn't enough for the mixer she was saving for, but it would contribute a nice bit towards it.

Kazuya also gave her a gift card for the same reason, but he'd found out what it was she wanted and had given her enough to cover it completely, along with some accessories. For Eitoku, he'd brought a gift card for Amazon, so he could purchase whatever he wanted; continuing in the gift card theme, he gave Eijun's father a gift card for iTunes, so he could add to his music collection.

For each other, the boys had presents upstairs; they also had one that was public, and they exchanged them.

Kazuya handed Eijun his gift, and watched as he unwrapped it. It was a long chain with something that looked like dog tags on it. Eijun looked at them curiously, flipping them over. One of them was a traditional dog tag, it had his name embossed on it, but the other was a playing card; it was an ace of diamonds. Eijun looked at it for a minute, when his father snorted, and his grandfather smacked him. Chika shook her head at her idiot son.

"Kazuya, that's awesome, what a great idea! Eijun, dear, what is that?" She tried in vain to lead him to the right conclusion.

"It's a card."

"No, idiot. What card is it?" His grandfather demanded, aiming another smack at his head. Kazuya was trying hard not to laugh. He'd not thought it would take him that long to get it.

"It's an ace of diamonds."

"Yes, it is. Do we really have to explain it to you?" His father asked.

"Please don't." Kazuya spoke up. "It'll come to him eventually, and that will be more fun than telling him outright."

"You're still nasty, Miyuki Kazuya. But I threw away the receipt for this, so I can't return it. I guess I have to give it to you." Eijun sulked, while Kazuya could see the wheels turning in his head as he tried to understand the message in his gift.

Kazuya opened his gift slowly, curious about what could be in the box. Inside, there was a stack of Moleskine notebooks, in a variety of colors and sizes. As he looked through them, he realized that some of them were grid paper, some lined, and some blank. He glanced at Eijun, who was looking unsure.

"I thought you could use them for scorekeeping, or play development, or something. I know that you have regular notebooks, but these are nice because you really can't remove the pages easily, so it's hard to lose something you've written. Also, it might be helpful to have a permanent record of your thoughts and plans, so you can reference them later. They're also really well made and sturdy, you can drag them with you wherever and they're not going to fall apart."

"Wow, Ei. What a great idea, thank you. I can really use these; I get tired of having to reimage things I know I've used before against other teams. Putting them somewhere like this is an amazing idea. I can draw the diamond in these unlined ones as well, and sort things out graphically. I love it, Eijun." Kazuya's mind was racing, thinking about what he could do with the gift.

Just then, Eijun let out a massive groan, and everybody laughed.

"Finally got it, brat?" Kazuya smirked.

"Yes, you tanuki. I got it. Thank you, Kazuya, it's perfect." He leaned over and kissed Kazuya's cheek.

Everybody laughed and stood up; the gift exchange was over and they were all heading to their rooms. The adults to sleep, and the boys to exchange their main gifts.

Chika hugged Kazuya before heading off. "Thank you again, Kazuya. You shouldn't have spent so much money on us, though."

"I didn't get you anything for years; this is just making up for lost time."

She chuckled. "Okay, I'll let it go this time. But I also wanted to tell you not to be nervous. Whatever you're planning, trust Eijun to see your heart."

"How did you—"

"Although you've gotten better, you still have your tells, Kazuya." She pushed his hair out of his face, framing it with her hand. "I trust you. I know you love Eijun, and I trust you with him. Please take good care of him, he's very special."

"I know, and I will."

"That's all I can ask." She kissed his cheek. "I love you, Kazuya. Goodnight."

She stepped away and hugged Eijun, whispering in his ear. "Kazuya's very nervous about something. I'm not sure what he's up to, but whatever it is, please stop and think before you react. Try to see what it is he's telling you; look for his heart. I know he loves you more than anything—remember that."

Eijun pulled back, and kissed his mom on her cheek. "Thank you, Mom. I will. I love you; we'll see you in the morning."

The adults headed upstairs, leaving the boys in the living room by the tree. They looked at each other for a second, and then they both moved forward, pulling the other into a hug, foreheads meeting, leaning into each other.

"Hi, gorgeous."

"Hello, beautiful."

They stared into each other's eyes, no need for words. After a minute, an hour, a week, Eijun spoke. "Do you want to open the presents here, or in the room?"

"It doesn't matter to me, what do you think?"

"Let's do it here, by the tree. It seems fitting."

"Okay, let me go grab your gift." Kazuya started for the stairs.

"Can you grab yours as well? It's in the top drawer of my dresser."

"Sure." Kazuya found both gifts and headed back downstairs.

They sat by the tree, by each other. Eijun slid over closer so that their legs were touching.

Kazuya fiddled with his gift, looking unsure.

"You're really nervous about this, right? I'm sure it will be fine, but is there anything I can do that will help you?"

"Promise me, Eijun, that you won't shut me out."

"I can promise that...but what kind of present is it that you expect me to hate you for?"

"You'll see."

"All right. You open yours first, Kazuya." Eijun handed over the gift, the picture of them framed so nicely. He'd had his mother buy the frame, and she'd done a wonderful job.

Kazuya unwrapped the box and opened it carefully. He pulled back the tissue paper to reveal the picture of them on the field, the beautiful sunset and absolute adoration that was revealed in that candid moment. "Ei…" he breathed, transfixed. He stared, eyes watering as he took in the details. "I think it's the most beautiful picture I've ever seen."

Kazuya raised his head, and looked at his boy. "Where did you get this? It's gorgeous, Eijun."

"Haruichi took it a while ago. As soon as I saw it, I knew I wanted to give it to you, so I had him put it aside for me. I had Mom frame it for you, and I think she did a wonderful job."

Kazuya leaned over and rested his head on Eijun's shoulder. 'She did. It's perfect, I love it so much. Thank you, Eijun."

He took a deep breath and handed over his present.

Eijun took it and slowly began to unwrap it. He opened the box and peeled back the tissue, uncovering a book. It wasn't very thick, and the cover was plain, black, with white lettering. It was titled, simply, 'The Last Thing You Don't Know About Me.'

He looked up at Kazuya, curious. Kazuya felt like he was going to pass out; he was so scared, he couldn't remember a time he'd been this nervous about something.

Eijun took the book out of the box, turned it to the first page, the dedication page, and read.

Eijun-

This is the last thing you don't know about me.

I hope you know that I love you and if I had it to do over again, there are certain specific things I would change about the past. But I can't.

So please read this in the spirit in which it is offered. It's the last thing I haven't turned over to you completely. Now you own every bit of me.

I am yours, and I hope with all my heart that after reading this, you are still mine.

Yours forever,

Kazuya.

Eijun wiped away a tear, and looked again at Kazuya. He was staring at his lap, steadfastly refusing to meet Eijun's gaze. Eijun, still very confused about what this could be, looked back down at the book and turned past the title page, taking a deep breath.

From: Ei-chan(catch4me .jp)

To: Me(pitch2me .jp)

13 May 2010

Hi, Kazu-kun-

How is it going? How do you like Middle school? is it harder than elementary? What about the team is it a good team? how's the coach?

I am doing ok, schools the same, so is the team. I miss playing with you. Gramps says you need to come visit, you probably need a few smacks. It would be nice to have him smack someone else sometimes. mom says to tell you she misses you, so she misses you!

My birthday is next week, I think I'm getting a new mitt, my old one is getting too small. I dont know when you're ever going to grow out of yours, shorty! Hahaha.

Well, I'm going to send this now, I'lll write to you again soon. write me back soon, too!

TTYL-

Eijun

From: Me(pitch2me .jp)

To: Ei-chan(catch4me .jp)

14 May 2010

Eijun-

I hate it here, I miss you and I miss Nagano.

There are too many people in Tokyo.

My dad works all the time.

I miss you.

Kazuya

Eijun-

This is the first of your emails that I didn't respond to. That answer sat in my drafts folder for 5 years. It's exactly what I wrote, no editing. This book is all of them, every email you ever sent me, and the replies that I never returned. At the end of each exchange, I've added a little information about what was going on at the time, and where my head was.

I never stopped reading your emails, and I never stopped answering them.

I missed you so desperately and I hated my life so much. I didn't want you to see that part of me; I never wanted to hurt you like that. Instead, I hurt you in other ways, and I will always regret that.

Please understand that I never forgot you, that your emails were a lifeline for me, and they always came exactly when I needed them most. You saved me, Eijun, from so many temptations, from doing things, horrible, permanent, damaging things. You've always been my salvation, and that will never change.

When I wrote this, I'd just burnt dinner. Dad was out late again, and all we had in the house was some rice. School was not hard, but it was boring. Baseball was tough, though. You know how small I was, and how mouthy. I was a first year, telling all of the upperclassmen that they sucked. That day, I'd gotten my first beating, but it was not my last.

Eijun was stunned. He sat, staring at the page, trying to take in what he'd just read. He kept, no, he read and answered all my emails, but didn't send them? Why would he...he was in hell, remember? He didn't want to worry me. But...well. Finally, he spoke.

"I'm not going anywhere, Kazu, but I'm not yet sure if I'm mad at you or not. I'm upset, of course, but working it out. So let me talk to you for a minute, and then I'm going to read this book. And you're going to let me, you're going to go watch TV or something and not hover. Is that alright with you?"

Kazuya let out the breath he'd been holding. "That's fine, that's good. Ask me whatever you want to know."

"You've read, answered, and saved every email I've sent you, even though you never sent a reply. How many are in here?"

"Right around one hundred."

"And you answered them all?"

"Yes."

"Even the ones I sent at Seido?"

"Yes."

"Why did you start using...wait, never mind. If you'd used your old email, I might have guessed you got my other emails."

Kazuya nodded.

"You even said 'I don't know if you're still using this account.' in the first email you sent."

"Not exactly. I said 'I hope'. Not a lie, because I did hope you would answer me. It was underhanded, but I didn't know how else to talk to you, and I needed to talk to you so badly."

"Okay. I'm sure I'll think of some other questions, but for now, I need to read this."

Kazuya nodded, and headed out of the room.

"Oh, Kazu?" Eijun stopped him as he was walking out. Kazuya turned. Eijun was right behind him, and he reached out and pulled Kazuya close.

He whispered in his ear, "I know you're worried, and you have every right to be. But there are some things you don't need to be worried about. This, and whatever the result of this is, isn't going to change one thing: You are mine and I am yours. I love you, Kazuya. I told you a while ago that you'd have to work hard to get rid of me, and I meant it." He pulled away and went to sit on the couch, book in hand. Kazuya just stared at him for a minute, and then walked away, nerves gone, heart lighter than it had been all day.

A couple of hours later, Eijun closed the book.

He'd gotten to the end, read the last email, and he tried to think. He thought he should be upset, thought that maybe he should be so pissed at Kazuya for keeping this from him, but he wasn't. He just wasn't. He was sad that they'd missed so much time together, and he mourned for the boy who fought so hard to survive.

But, in consideration, if they'd never been separated, had never had to learn the things they did, they probably wouldn't be where they were, may not even be together.

Decision made, mind clear, he went to find Kazuya. Poking his head into the den, he saw Kazuya sitting on the floor, leaning against the couch, absorbed in a baseball game. Looking closer, he saw it was their last game against Yakushi. Eijun walked quietly into the room and by the time Kazuya finally noticed him, he was already sliding into his boy's lap, assuming his favorite position.

Slipping his arms around Kazuya's waist, he rested his head on his shoulder. Kazuya wrapped his arms around Eijun and lowered his head to Eijun's shoulder, waiting for him to speak.

"Kazu, I...I. God. I guess I'll just say what I'm thinking in simple sentences and we can sort it out together. I love you. I am so sorry you went through all of that. I am sorry that you were afraid to tell me about the emails, that you were so worried. That book is precious to me, and I'll treasure it forever. I regret and hate that we were apart, that we went through those things, but I know that they made us better equipped for what we have to deal with.

"Mostly, I want to say thank you. As much as you say I saved you, you saved me. In the darkest times, when I thought about giving up, you were what I thought of, wondering where you were, promising myself I'd find you. You motivated me to keep trying. So, thank you, Miyuki Kazuya. Thank you for everything."

"Eijun. I just know this...I know that I love you. I know that I would do whatever you asked of me. I know that I will do whatever it takes to make you happy. I know that I don't ever want to let you go, that you're the most important person in my life right now, and that at the end of the day, you are mine, and I am yours.

"I never meant to deceive you about the emails; it just really never came up. I didn't plan to make the book until sometime in the middle of the fall tournament, when I realized you didn't know about them. It became something of an obsession for me to remember when and what was going on with each of them. I want you to know everything."

Eijun lifted his head from Kazuya's shoulder. "Kazuya, look at me."

Kazuya complied, lifting his head. Eijun met his eyes, saw the traces of tears, the love and the hope and the possibility of joy tucked in the corner, and said. "Show me everything, Kazuya. Please. Show me you."

Kazuya smiled softly, and cupped Eijun's cheek. "I can't hide anything from you, Eijun. You see me, you know me. You are the one thing I trust in this world to be true. When we're away from here, when we're out in the world, please remember that. No matter how things may appear, I trust you. Implicitly."

Blinking back the tears that threatened, Eijun leaned into Kazuya, pressing their foreheads together. Breathing each other's air, they moved, tilting their heads and fitting their mouths together. This kiss, this one kiss, this kiss was special. It was an acknowledgement and a promise, a sigh and a sign. Drawing back, they didn't smile, they just looked at each other, recognizing what the other had said. Heads dropped back on shoulders, arms wrapped waists, and they were, together.

They may have dozed off, they were never sure, but after some time the clock chimed. Eijun startled, and saw it was six; sunrise was shortly after seven.

"Kazu, if we want to see the sunrise, we'd better get moving."

"Right, well...get off me, brat, and we'll go."

"Oh, yeah." They untangled, and Eijun stood up. "I'm going to go grab a few things, I'll be right down." He ran upstairs and grabbed his backpack, stuck some stuff inside, and headed back down. Kazuya was in the genkan, slipping on his shoes.

"Where did you say we were going, Ei?"

"Up the hill, to the park we used to play in all the time."

"The one with the ball fields in the middle?"

"Yeah, that one."

"Okay, cool. I think I remember how to get there."

"Lead on, then, Surizuya."

"Surizuya? Really? Would you please stop making shit up?"

"Ok, Bossyuki."

"Eijun. That's just bad."

"Thank you!"

"I'm not…"

They bickered and laughed all the way up the hill, to the park, getting there just as the first tinges of color were showing in the sky. Eijun led Kazuya to the field they used to use for practice all the time, moving to the middle of the outfield.

"This is where we had our first conversation about playing real baseball, Kazu, do you remember?"

"Yes! I remember I could join, but you couldn't because you were too young, we were so upset."

Eijun reached into his bag and pulled out a couple of gloves and a ball. 'Wanna play some catch, Kazu-kun?"

Kazuya held his hand out. "Always, Ei-chan." He smiled at his boy, who tossed him the ball.

And so these boys who loved baseball, but not as much as they loved each other, saw in the first day of the new year the same way that they'd begun their journey twelve years earlier.

With a simple game of catch.

A/N: Thank you for reading this. I've written a lot more fics in this AU, they're all over on AO3, under the same username, WhyTheHandbasket. Feel free to check them out:)