Well, this is my first movie AU on this account! I know I'm currently working on something separate, but I'm having real writer's block with that one at the moment and I figured something new might help me out a bit. Although I didn't particularly like this movie (it was OK, but nothing spectacular), I did enjoy the concept, so here goes the first chapter...

"I'm 27…"

Castiel couldn't believe it; here he was, standing outside a nightclub in the bitter cold trying to convince some body guard (who was clearly denser than he looked) that he was in fact old enough to drink alcohol and get royally fucked, as Gabriel chose to put it.

The guy scoffed "Not with that skin, you're not. It's smoother than a baby's backside."

He wasn't sure if he should be offended or over the moon.

"Look, my lil' bro here's just had a bad run-in with his ex…" Gabriel slapped a hand onto the guard's shoulder "Give him a break, would ya?"

Castiel flinched at the mention of Hannah, the stunning woman with the crystal blue eyes and jet black hair that had somehow came into his life, stolen his heart, and then left him feeling like a complete and utter chump after running off to his brother, Balthazar.

"ID, then you can get in." He sounded pretty adamant.

Gabriel, who by this point had wedged the strawberry lollipop he'd initially been sucking between his fingers, as if to prove he meant business, continued "Yes, he's friggin adorable with those baby blues, and we're all so horribly jealous of him, but check out that 5 o'clock shadow!"

Castiel rubbed his jaw self-consciously; he couldn't go without shaving for a few hours without that damn beard sprouting up again.

The guard scarcely flinched "I got facial hair when I was 8 years old."

Way to go, Gabriel.

He was now checking his pockets once more, as if his wallet would magically appear somewhere amongst his trenchcoat if he looked hard enough.

It was useless "You know what, Gabriel…" He sighed "I'm just going to go home."

His golden-eyed brother went to object, but found himself suddenly distracted by a rather tall, young man sporting some lovely, brown locks. The man shuffled past, handing his ID over to the body guard and offering them a small, polite smile before heading inside the club.

Gabriel licked his lips briefly, eyes sparkling.

Castiel smiled softly "Just go have fun, Gabe." He wasn't one for nicknames, but it seemed like the appropriate time.

The shorter man grinned, shoving a thumbs-up into Castiel's face "You got it, Cassie!"

It wasn't long before he found himself trudging home through the snow, trenchcoat providing all the warmth he needed, humming along to Joey Scarbury's "Believe it or not" as he went.

The sky was clear, despite threats of an upcoming blizzard. He couldn't help but shake his head a little as he stumbled up the icy steps leading to his apartment; did the weathermen ever get it right?

"Chickened out, Clarence?"

Castiel sighed at the dark haired woman who greeted him immediately at the door. He and Meg had had a fling back in college, but were now strictly 'besties' (another of Gabriel's famous words) and shared an apartment together. Most people couldn't get past the fact that neither one of them was gay; they'd been confronted about their relationship on numerous occasions.

"I left my wallet, along with my ID."

Meg swigged the bottle of orange liquid in her hand and nodded towards the kitchen "On the table… now get outta here!"

He sighed, slumping onto the sofa "I think I'd prefer to stay at home."

Before he knew it, Meg had leapt into the space next to him, her dark eyes glaring at his doleful expression "Shit, you saw that Anna again, didn't you?"

"Hannah." He corrected her sternly, still slightly territorial over his ex.

"If it looks like a duck…" Castiel tilted his head in confusion "Forget about it."

The pair sat there for a moment; it wasn't an awkward silence, there just wasn't much more to say on the matter.

Meg flicked Castiel's ear briskly, receiving a sharp groan of pain "Let's get you back on the horse, then." She sounded bored, almost, but that was just Meg.

"I don't think-"

"Can it, Clarence!" She swatted away his objections "I know a place."

He couldn't help but cringe "A club…?"

"Pfft." She tittered, grabbing her laptop from off the coffee table and tapping a few keys "A website. A dating website."

Castiel chuckled lightly "I don't believe that me and dating sites would cooperate well."

Meg busied herself typing in the right address "That's why I'm here to do all the heavy lifting."

She really was quite beautiful, Castiel observed (as he often did), even when she was furiously punching her keyboard with brute force. It was a kind of thorny beauty that only contributed to her shrewd nature, emphasised by the dark features against pale skin she'd acquired. If he hadn't come to think of Meg as his little sister, he might have felt the urge to act on his attraction. But, they'd had a go at that in the past and it just didn't feel right; couples can only be polar opposites to a certain extent, he believed.

"Ah, he we are..." She grinned "Guys in Gear. com"

Castiel's eyebrows shot up "G-Guys?"

She cast him a mischievous look "In gear."

"But-"

"You're not a raging homo, right?" Meg flexed her fingers and loosened her shoulders "But you will be after I'm through with you."

He tilted his head, using those puppy-dog eyes on her "Meg…?"

"Beer. Vodka. Now."

He daren't argue with her, not after last time… With a groan, he forced himself up and into the kitchen to fetch the alcohol, knowing too well that he'd have to drink at least a dozen shots before he'd even feel a twinge; he was insanely resistant to drink.

"I think you may have lost your mind," He called from the fridge "I've not once felt something for someone of the same sex as me."

"And look where it's getting you!" Was her reply "Surrounding yourself in eligible women clearly isn't working, so why not try something different?"

He repositioned himself on the sofa, lining the shot glasses carefully across the table and filling them to equal heights. The smell was sharp, but nothing he wasn't used to after 8 years of living with Meg.

"Why? You're not homophobic, are you?" She jabbed an accusing finger at his chest.

Castiel could feel his cheeks pinkening ever so slightly "No, of course not." He crossed his arms over his chest defensively "I accept all sexualities."

"Good."

And that was that.

"Let's set you up a profile…" Meg clicked a few buttons and spun the laptop around so Castiel could see "Time to choose a profile picture."

He furrowed his brow, not quite sure what his roommate was trying to achieve from all of this, before taking control of the computer. After a short browse through Meg's gallery, he settled on a photo of them both standing beneath a waterfall, grinning like idiots "This one?"

She recoiled "Holy- I'll have to crop my face out."

"What? Why?!" Castiel blurted, slightly off put by the idea of using a picture just of himself (even if that was kind of the point).

Meg didn't have to explain why, so instead she shot him daggers with her dark eyes and went about removing herself from the photo "That's better."

He didn't agree, but decided against complaining and took his first shot, welcoming the burning sensation that cleared his throat.

After a moment's silence, Meg snorted from behind her laptop and smirked up at a rather anxious-looking Castiel "What do your hobbies include?" She asked the question in a mockingly polite tone of voice, awaiting his answer with a supressed chuckle.

"Seriously?" She nodded "Um… I suppose I do enjoy a good walk."

He gave her time to type as she snickered "You sound so gay right now."

That may or may not have made him shiver.

"What else?"

He shrugged "Sex?"

Meg gave him the look "Everyone on this site loves sex. That's the idea."

Castiel laughed lightly, knowing perfectly well how to wind his friend up "How about reading?"

"Geez, Clarence. What with the long walks on the beach and a passion for literature, you're starting to come across as a really exciting dude…" But she typed in the information all the same.

He fidgeted in his seat, slightly offended by the sarcastic comment "I don't get out much." He downed his second shot.

"Yeah, I know." She smiled "Now you love deep-sea diving, bike rides and baking."

"Baking?!" Castiel found the word offensive.

Meg simply shrugged "If you were gay, you'd definitely be the girly one."

"You try telling Gabriel that baking is unmanly and then get back to me." He pouted.

She considered that, wrinkled her nose and then continued "What's your favourite film?"

He stiffened "Um…"

They both knew that Castiel was far from familiar with anything remotely similar to a movie "Maybe we'll just skip that one, then." Meg decided finally.

"Food?"

"Burgers." Castiel answered immediately "And pork rinds…"

She shook her head lightly, but she was smiling "Colour?"

"Blue."

"Animal?"

He grinned "Bees…"

Cas and those damn honey bees…

"Place of interest?"

Castiel resisted the urge to say the Metropolitan Museum in New York, where he'd first met Hannah. She'd been squinting at a painting for over a half an hour and he'd just watched her, mesmerised.

"Skip it."

Meg gave him a sympathetic look, like she knew what he was thinking "Why don't we just leave it there and get to the good stuff, huh?"

He swallowed thickly "Yes, that sounds like a good idea."

While she finished perfecting his account, Castiel took it upon himself to drink another 5 shots, determined to get himself plastered; it's not as if he actually expected to go along with this, but it would take his mind off Hannah all the same.

"Done." Meg eventually said, twisting the laptop around to Castiel "See anyone you fancy?"

It was a ludicrous question, considering Castiel wasn't gay and therefore didn't feel inclined to voice his physical attraction to any of the men joined up on this site. It was strictly homosexual, with around 40% of the men having a tick next to the word 'gear' under their profile picture; some wore police outfits, some chef hats or typical teacher get-ups, and others posed in builders' overalls.

He loosened his collar "Um… I'm not sure about this, Meg."

"Live a little!" She leaned over to grab a shot of vodka "Dicks aren't scary, I promise."

"You do realize I have a penis, don't you?"

"It sure didn't feel like it when we dated…" Her eyebrows quirked mischievously.

Castiel felt his face turn hot "Ass-butt."

She pinched his cheek "You know you love me."

He swatted her away and began scrolling down the list of available guys (he didn't mind if they were with or without 'gear'). The vast majority of them were in their early 40's, with an odd few reaching their 50's and the rest around the late 20's to mid-30's mark. He focussed primarily on the latter age group, not wanting anyone who exceeded his own age by more than a few years.

Hesitantly, he clicked on someone called 'Barry', his username being barryevans4thewin. Wow.

"Who've you found there?" Meg craned her neck to get a peek and grunted at the god-awful username.

Castiel blushed "I was just browsing, like you told me to." Then, feeling like he needed to clarify his sexuality, he added "It's not like I'm actually going to meet up with any of them. I'm straight, Meg."

She rolled her eyes "Stop defending your masculinity; there's such a thing as bi, remember?"

He flushed a deeper shade of red and continued to scroll down, ignoring Barry's rather intriguing profile.

"Oh, oh!" She almost choked on her drink "Go back! Go back!"

Castiel sighed, but obeyed all the same.

"Well, hello…" Meg grinned sinfully, nodding her head towards someone under the username chevyimpala67. His name was Dean.

Even Castiel couldn't deny that this Dean fella was attractive; his skin was slightly tanned and decorated lightly with freckles that arched up his face and over his nose. His eyes were a luscious shade of green that twinkled playfully in his photo and were shaded by lovely, long lashes that curled at the ends. His hair was a sandy brown that tufted at the fridge; not in that gel-slick teenager kind of way, but a natural, 'I just woke up like this' kind of way. And those lips! People said that Castiel had full lips, but Dean's were almost womanly, in a sexy kind of way…

He immediately shook himself out of his daze and shrugged "He's OK looking, I suppose."

Meg just gawped at him "Really?! Come on, he's hot!"

Castiel fought the urge to blush "I said he's OK. But like I've already informed you, I'm not a homosexual."

"Well, Dean certainly is…" Meg giggled, which just sounded wrong in her skin.

A quick glance at his profile told them that Dean's surname was Winchester, he had a brother, his favourite movies usually starred Clint Eastwood, his favourite food was bacon cheeseburgers (emphasis on the bacon), his favourite stooge was Curley, he was just looking for a casual fling as he was already in a committed relationship with his car (which Castiel had to chuckle at), he loved Metallica and he was allergic to cats.

"Well," Castiel coughed "He certainly likes to put himself out there, doesn't he?"

Meg sighed "Nothing wrong with being open, Clarence. You should try it now and again"

Choosing to ignore her, Castiel flicked through Dean's gallery and learned a new fact; Dean really liked flannel.

"I'm not gay." He said pointedly, pushing the laptop away and taking his 8th, maybe 9th shot of the night. He could just about feel the stress of the day receding.

"Hey there. Nice profile – like your car." Meg spoke aloud whilst typing.

It was a while before Castiel caught on "Wait, what are you doing?!"

"Messaging Dean." She said matter-of-factly.

He spluttered "W-Why?!"

"'Cus he's hot, you're single, and it's time for a change."

Castiel growled, throwing back another 2 shots "I hate you."

"Yeah, yeah…" She waved him off "You said that at the Christmas party after I swapped your drink for vinegar and look at us now."

He rolled his eyes.

A couple of minutes past and Castiel was sure Dean was ignoring him (or Meg), when there was a sudden 'bleep'.

Meg raised her eyebrows and read the message off the screen "Hey yourself. Thanks, she's my baby. Got her when I was 21 and haven't looked back. See you prefer a walk, yourself."

Castiel squirmed; he was itching to take the laptop and converse with this stranger. He had no sexual intentions, but he was curious about this 'Dean Winchester' with the leather jacket and beat-up old car he claimed to be his 'baby'.

"There's already some flirty banter going on." Meg teased "Do you want to message him back?"

He ran his finger along the rim of an empty shot glass gingerly.

"Hey, I won't judge you! Why don't you just talk as friends for a while?"

Castiel blinked "But you said everyone on this website was looking for sex?"

"Ever heard of friends with benefits?" She winked.

At her roommate's fierce blush, she handed over the laptop and retreated to the kitchen for more alcohol and snacks.

Castiel breathed slowly, his hands hovering over the keyboard reluctantly. This is not gay. He thought to himself. I'm simply interested in this man's backstory.

Convinced by himself, he began to type

Yes. Walking helps clear my head, not that there's much to clear half of the time. Though I do own a car myself.

He awaited Dean's reply eagerly; it came through within the minute

You don't seem like the vacant type to me? Tell me what's on your mind.

Shocked by the sincerity of this stranger's sudden interest in 'what was on his mind', Castiel poured himself another shot and threw it back with a gasp.

Well, if you must know, I'm still recovering from a bad break up. My friend signed me up here for mad, angry gay-sex.

Ha, that's the best kind of sex. Tell me about your ex.

There's not much to tell. She (yes, she) was the love of my life, or so I thought. Then she decided to have sex with my brother in our bed.

Ouch. So, you straight or bi? I'm guessing the latter.

Actually…

He paused, unsure if he should reveal his sexuality to Dean straight away. There was something intriguing about him, Castiel would admit, and now that they'd got chatting, he didn't want to scare him off.

Yes, I'm bi. Is that OK?

Hey, you don't need my permission! Anything's fine with me.

Have you ever been with a woman?

Of course; they're beautiful creatures. But I wouldn't say no to a nice, long-

Castiel snapped the lid shut, face burning, as Meg joined him on the sofa once more.

"Hey!" She complained, a crate of beer and two bags of pork rinds in her hands "What are you doing!"

He wriggled in his seat, reaching for a beer "It was getting a little graphic for my taste."

She rolled her eyes and snatched the computer out of his hands, opening it up to reveal the conversation so far "Oh… Oh..." She chewed her bottom lip "Oh, he does have a way with words…"

Castiel blushed "Let me see!"

Dean's message ended as he'd expected, making his cheeks ever warmer.

You still there, Cas?

He jolted at the nickname, but didn't mind too much.

Yeah, sorry… connection cut off.

Sure it wasn't because I said a bad word? ;)

I'm 27, not 7.

Yeah, what's with your insanely good complexion?

A healthy diet works wonders, Dean. Perhaps you should lay off the pies.

He made reference to Dean's profile, recalling that although his favourite food was bacon cheese burgers, his favourite dessert was most definitely pie.

NO. YOU LEAVE MY PIE ALONE.

Are you talking dirty to me?

Castiel blushed at his own forwardness. Was he actually flirting with a man over the internet?

Only if you want me to.

All confusion aside, Castiel found himself shivering when the stranger spoke so bluntly, as if this were the most casual conversation in the world. He decided to go along with it, even if he was uber- straight and had no plans of meeting up with Dean whatsoever. It was just a bit of fun, like Meg had said.

And who said that I did?

Well, if you change your mind, just let me know.

Will do. So, tell me more about this car of yours. What makes her so special?

She's sex on wheels, for one thing. Definite chick-magnet.

Castiel paused, slightly taken aback.

No, you're not the only open-minded guy here. Like I said earlier, women are beautiful creatures. But don't worry, men are my favourite.

That's good to hear. To tell you the truth, I've never really been with a man before.

Well, it was the truth!

Interesting. So, are you new to the whole 'I like penis' thing, or…?

Castiel laughed out loud, ignoring Meg's smirks.

I guess you could say that. I've only been in love once and it was with a woman. All through high school, I dated a couple of girls. Then in college, I went with my best friend for a few months. We're roommates now; no awkward feelings!

Wow, you sound like a great guy.

Why do you say that?

You dated your best friend in college and now, instead of acting like a scared little bitch and dropping her like a sack of potatoes, you're actually living together without any kind of sexual frustration whatsoever! Impressive.

He'd never thought about it like that before, but something about this complete stranger not thinking he was a bitch made him smile. What was happening here?

Well, thank you. I've never actually considered that. So, the car… sorry if I sound like a broken record, but something tells me that it's of the upmost importance to you. I'm interested.

Dean fell silent for a few of minutes; Castiel took advantage of the moment by taking a couple more shots (he was definitely starting to feel something now) and opening another beer. A reply came through.

Why don't we discuss it at my place?

Castiel whimpered, knowing that the conversation would now have to come an end. Of course he couldn't go around to Dean Winchester's house, wherever the hell that was, and have gay sex when he wasn't, repeat wasn't gay!

"What's up?" Meg asked from the opposite side of the sofa.

He hesitated "He's asking me to come over."

With that, Meg swiped the laptop out of Castiel's grasp and skimmed through the conversation, wide-eyed like a 12 year old "Woah. There's undeniable chemistry going on here, Clarence."

She seemed genuinely surprised

"But, you're the one who signed me up!" Castiel argued with Meg's stunned expression.

She stuttered "Yeah, as a joke! I didn't think you'd actually meet someone. I mean… you're straight!"

He nodded absentmindedly "Exactly."

"Cas…?"

"I am!" He snapped, heat rising in his cheeks.

"Well, you and this Dean seem to be getting on like a house on fire, if anything!"

"What should I do?"

She frowned slightly "How long have you kept him hanging?"

Castiel glanced at Dean's message and then at the clock "About 3 minutes."

"He'll be panicking, now." She muttered "You could at least reply."

"And say what, exactly? Sorry, but I'm actually not gay, I was just enjoying our conversation, so I led you on and I apologise?!"

Meg shrugged "Or you could just make it clear that you're not looking for sex tonight and go around strictly as a friend."

He considered it for a moment, shoulders tense "Um, OK. I-I'll ask him now…"

Dean? You still there?

Yeah, of course. You OK? Did I come on too strong?

No… well, yes. Sort of. It's not your fault.

I'm sorry, Cas. I'm a very 'out-there' kind of guy. Just ignore me.

It's me who should be apologising. I flirted back.

So, I'm guessing your politely declining my offer :(

Castiel felt a lump in his throat. What the hell was this Dean Winchester doing to him?!

Well, I could always come around and talk. If that's not cheeky…

There was a moment's pause and Castiel could feel his body trembling.

Sure! I'd like that. Here's my address.

Castiel swore he was vaguely familiar with the area Dean lived in, though not 100%. He'd have to take his car and use the satnav and oh my Jesus good god he was about to drive up to an openly-bisexual man's house 'to talk' in what might end up being the worst decision he ever made…

OK. I'll meet you in half an hour?

Sounds great! Seya then x

He shivered at the kiss Dean had left him in the message, feeling like a teenager all over again. Then it hit him smack-bam in the face.

Wait!

You OK?

Do you mind if we video chat first? I don't want to walk straight into a serial killer's lair…

Ha, of course. Good idea.

Castiel breathed a sigh of relief and requested the chat. Within a few moments, he was face to face with Dean on webcam, struggling to keep down his blush.

"Hey!" The younger man grinned "You're much cuter than in your photo."

He gasped slightly, face flushed whilst Meg try to supress her laughter "Uh, th-thank you?"

Dean winked "So, do I pass the test?"

He moved his laptop around the room slowly, showing off his apartment to assure Castiel that he didn't have any bodies stored downstairs. Though, he'd like to think that Dean didn't have bodies stored anywhere in the house…

"Oh, yes! I suppose you do." He smiled awkwardly "So… should I-"

"Get your feathery-ass down here right this instant?" Dean interrupted "Heck, yeah!"

Castiel wasn't sure what inspired that nickname, but he couldn't hold back his grin "Y-Yes, I'll see you soon, I guess."

"Later, Cas!" Dean gave a small salute before his image cut out.

Once he'd jotted the address down, making sure to check it twice, and closed the laptop, Castiel let out a shaky breath. Did he really want to do this? Four hours ago, he was hopelessly fawning over his female ex, and now he was contemplating meeting up with Dean Winchester, the man he'd met on a gay dating site. That was how messed up his life was.

"So…" Meg chuckled "You pulled, then."

He glared at her "I'm not gay, Meg! We're meeting as friends!"

She raised her hands in defeat jokingly "Just remember to lube up; the first time must be a real squeeze, I can imagine…"

His cheeks were beaming now as he grabbed his trenchcoat and headed towards the door, not before flipping off a rather amused Meg.

Not sure how I feel about this yet. If I feel like I want to continue (or if anyone on here becomes interested), I'll try and update within the next couple of days, maybe even tomorrow. All faves, follows and reviews are equally appreciated; thank you!