A/N: Sorry, I kept you waiting so long. My muse is all over the place and pulls my ear with it. But now, I'm back with the Bellas. Hope you like.
The chatter had finally stopped, one by one their current roommates had gone to sleep. But Beca and Chloe who'd been given the bed by popular vote were still awake, holding hands under the veil of darkness, staring into each other's eyes, and smiling.
"Crazy night, huh?" Beca whispered.
Chloe nodded. "What happened at the club, like, are you okay? That was pretty intense."
"It was and... God, I wish it hadn't happened. I mean, the guy being a douche, but also us humiliating him. These things rarely feel good for longer than an hour."
Chloe cupped Beca's cheek. "He deserved it."
"I know that. It just... it made me uncomfortable. The... raw performance of... us versus him. Of us versus... the world."
"That guy is not the world, Beca. He may think he is, but he's not."
Beca rolled onto her back, looking up at the ceiling she couldn't really see. She pulled Chloe's hand with her own over her chest.
"You felt judged by him, didn't you?" Chloe pushed herself up and closer to Beca, her nose touching the side of her face and her breath tickling her.
"Yes, and it felt... it was hurtful. It also made me angry, the way he looked at you. Like he had a right to your body because he was a man." She had to clear her voice, because it got scratchy with emotion, anger, but also a sense of humiliation.
Chloe touched her hand to Beca's chin and turned her head toward her. "The only people with a right to my body are me and the person I allow access to it. At the moment, that's you." She kissed her cheek. "Do you want access to it now?" she then whispered hotly.
There was no air for a moment as Beca struggled to breathe. But as her lungs filled again, a whimper escaped. She could feel her heart hammering against her chest.
Chloe put her lips to Beca's for a kiss, not exactly chaste, but too short to... well, almost too short to enjoy. As she pulled back, Beca followed pressing their lips back together for some more intimate contact.
"Mhh-mh, that's nice," Chloe whispered.
Beca rolled back onto her side, laying her arm around Chloe's waist, pulling her closer. "It was... difficult tonight after... that guy watched us. When we walked into the club hand in hand, I didn't even think about it and then we danced and... that was... unbelievable. I've never felt... so much, Chlo."
Chloe was smiling and nudged Beca with her nose.
"But then he looked at us, at you and... I became self-conscious. He made me feel bad about feeling so good."
"I'm sorry, B. I should've paid more attention and called him out for it right away. I just didn't want to ruin our evening together."
"It wasn't your fault. I could've done it myself and I should've. Things wouldn't have gotten so out of hand if I had." Beca closed her eyes and shook her head.
"No, hey, you just came out. You're... still new at all this and this was our first outing. I thought it was okay in a group, you know, with the Bellas. I should've paid better attention."
"You paid attention to me, very special attention. Though maybe next time we shouldn't feel each other up in the middle of a crowded club."
Chloe chuckled. "I don't know what you were doing, but I was touching your heart."
Beca felt heat flush her cheeks as she put her hand over her face. "Oh, God."
Chloe pulled her hand away. "You're so cute when you're flustered, but, hey... it was okay. I mean, maybe we shouldn't do it at the reception, but... I thought it was nice and good. I just sometimes need to connect with you."
"And my boob?"
Now they just barely kept from laughing.
"Yeah, maybe," Chloe admitted in a whisper.
The next moment, Beca felt a particular kind of warmth over her heart. A moan escaped her as Chloe's hand pushed a little lower, cupping her breast.
"Is this okay?" Chloe's face was so close to her own, there wasn't a breath between them. And then she kissed her again.
For long minutes, they let go of the stress and the circumstances and just kissed. And touched. Pressed against each other.
Then a movement from beyond the foot of the bed, roused their attention.
"Dammit, you guys. How's a girl supposed to sleep with you getting your grooves on? I tried to be nice about it, but... please, stop." Jessica looked up at them with pleading eyes.
"Sorry, Jess. We'll be good now," Beca said, pulling herself out of Chloe's arms.
"Way to ruin the mood, Jessica," came a pouting voice from the side of the bed where Stacie lay.
"We thought you were all asleep by now."
"Yeah, like we could sleep knowing you guys would get it on," Flo said.
"We didn't...," Beca wanted to defend them, but then realized they'd already proven her wrong. "We're sorry. Go to sleep," she told the four Bellas sleeping around them. "And you," she whispered at Chloe. "Hands off the goodies."
Chloe groaned and rolled onto her back. "Should've bunked with Aubrey," she pouted. "No temptation."
"Mhm, you love it," Beca disagreed as she snuggled up at Chloe's side with her arm coming around her waist.
"I really do."
There were mumbled groans telling them to shut up and after settling down more comfortably, everybody did.
It was just seven when Beca left the bedroom on tip-toes. Her night had been restless and she wasn't sure why. Things kept coming back in form of unsettling dreams she couldn't remember on waking. Finally, she'd lain awake, watching the rise and fall of Chloe's chest. It had been peaceful, but she felt anything but rested.
She slipped into her boots before entering the kitchen with its promising smell of coffee.
"You're up early," a not-too-friendly voice greeted her and Beca flinched. Of course, she would run into Aubrey on a morning like this.
"Yeah, couldn't sleep."
"Nervous about your speech?"
Beca walked over to the counter and poured herself a cup of coffee. "Not really, but thanks for reminding me," she noted as she leaned against the counter, watching Aubrey nibble on a piece of toast. "It's early for you too."
"I'm used to getting up at five, take a run, you know. I feel a little spoiled here, but I don't wanna become a total slob."
"Like the rest of us?" Beca asked, smiling.
Aubrey laughed. "Yeah, like you lot." She took a sip of her coffee, and watched Beca thoughfully. "Is this a good time to talk about Chloe and you?"
Beca took a deep breath. Of course, Aubrey wanted to talk to her about Chloe. "What if I say no?"
"Then we don't," Aubrey said.
Beca's eyebrows pulled together. "Okay, who are you and what have you done to Aubrey Posen?"
"Funny, but... well, believe it or not, I have changed. I know your relationship isn't really my business, unless you and Chloe allow it. I'm happy for you guys, you know? I know I haven't been your greatest supporter, but I know that Chloe's been in love with you for a long time and that she deserves to be happy."
"Do you think she is?" Beca asked.
"Are you kidding me? She's over the moon. Don't tell me you can't see that."
Beca shrugged. "I do, I'm just... I'm not sure I should talk to you about this, sorry."
Aubrey made a face. Beca wasn't sure if she was going to answer, but as someone else entered the kitchen, they got momentarily distracted. It was one of the brides, Casey.
"Morning," she greeted them, making a bee line for the coffee.
Beca stepped out of her way. "Morning."
"Hey, Casey."
Casey poured herself a cup and put it up to her nose to smell it. "Hmmmm," she made before taking a sip. "Coffee is my other true love," she said dreamily.
"I know how you feel," Beca agreed.
"Yeah, I can see that. And I don't just mean about coffee." She winked at Beca.
Aubrey laughed. "You got her there." Then she became serious again, looking from Casey to Beca as if contemplating something. "I know this is your big day, but maybe you could give Beca some advice? She doesn't quite trust me to spill her guts to."
"Now, that's not it, Aubrey. It's just... you're Chloe's best friend. And we've had our... differences."
"I'm aware, Becs. But you need to talk about this. And maybe Casey is... maybe it's good she's not a Bella?"
A quick glance at Casey told Beca she was intrigued and willing to listen, but she wasn't at all sure if she should talk to a virtual stranger about her relationship. She sighed.
"It's okay, we hardly know each other. But things are... well, in just an hour, there won't be any time for anything but wedding stuff. I'm here to listen if you want me to," Casey offered.
"And that's my clue," Aubrey said, picking up her cup of coffee and leaving the kitchen.
Casey sat down on the vacated stool, still nursing her cup and looking expectantly at Beca.
"I'm new to... this gay stuff," Beca said. She flinched at her own words. "Sorry, I... I'm not even sure how to... talk properly."
Casey smiled. "The art of lesbian conversation is quite simple, Beca, just put all your feelings out there."
A sigh escaped Beca. "Like that's easy. I mean, I'm really not good at this. I've been with a gay dude for the last three years and we never talked about how gay we are for other people."
"Three years is a long time. You never suspected?"
"About me or Jesse?"
"Yourself. And I guess about your boyfriend, too."
Beca shrugged. "Thinking back, I guess there were clues. Like, about a gazillion. The way... Chloe's been always special to me. There were things... happening between us I can't quite explain... I mean, how many of your friends walked into your shower and asked you to sing for them?"
"Oh, you'd be surprised."
Beca made an incredulous face at this.
"Sorry, I'm trying to ease your worry with humor. I guess, it doesn't work too well?"
In answer, Beca shook her head.
"How about Jesse?"
"Well, the last year's been... different, I guess. We both worked more for college and our respective groups. I think we were both more comfortable with... people of our own sex... gender. When we hung out we usually watched a movie or listened to music."
"Were you intimate?"
Beca sighed. "Not a lot... I can't even remember... we were more friends than anything, but I didn't really catch on that he was... starting to get interested in a Treble."
"Treble?"
"His a cappella group's called The Treblemakers, hence Treble."
Casey nodded. "Did he know about you and Chloe?"
"Hm," Beca made. She took a sip of her coffee to buy herself some time. "I think, there's been a time when he was jealous of her. I always spent a lot of time with the Bellas, not just practice, but we also lived together in the same house... as you know, of course. But I'd also put away extra time for Chloe. We would hang out seperately, and Jesse didn't understand why. He complained about it during our first year together, but I never changed anything and he... got used to it."
"You never questioned that?"
"No, I knew what I wanted. I would never let anyone get between me and my friends, certainly not a boy."
"Does Jesse know you're with Chloe now?"
Beca blinked. She talked to Jesse a few times since she'd left Barden. They usually talked about life in California, their respective jobs. Jesse had mentioned that he and Derek had been on a couple dates, but she hadn't reciprocated yet by telling him about her and Chloe. "No, I haven't told him yet."
"But you're planning to?"
Beca sighed. "I... It's not like I haven't told people about Chloe and I, I mean... my mom knows. And the Bellas, and they're the most important people in my life."
"And Jesse?"
Beca pushed off from the counter. She put her arms around her middle, hugging herself. Then she took a deep breath. "It feels strange talking to him about... my new relationship."
"Why?"
"Because... I don't know, maybe... because he's a guy."
Casey merely raised an eyebrow.
"I like... it sounds idiotic, I... with my mom and the Bellas, I feel... safe. I don't need to explain... not over-explain why I like Chloe, how she makes me feel. I haven't yet told my dad either."
"Do you feel unsure about your feelings?"
Beca shook her head. "Not about my feelings for Chloe. Just... about every other aspect of this... new thing. I don't know if... I'll be good at being gay."
Casey hopped off the stool and came over to Beca. She put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it. "If it's any consolation: there's no right or wrong way to be gay. It's still all about being yourself. And it doesn't need to be... everything. In fact, it shouldn't be. You're still Beca, you're still a Barden Bella, and someone who makes music. You're still you. The gay thing... it doesn't have to be a big part of your life. You decide. You can just be with Chloe and that's it. You don't need to wear a rainbow button, or go on pride parades if you don't want to. That's all just icing, your relationship with Chloe is the cake."
Beca couldn't help but smile. Thinking of her relationship as cake seemed almost too fitting. "That's a good metaphor."
"Yeah, I did good there." Casey answered Beca's smile with her own.
"Is it okay if I hug you? I mean, I'm not a great hugger, at least, I wasn't... the Bellas have ruined my life like that."
Casey opened her arms. "Bring it in."
It was a good hug. Casey was tall and she applied just the right amount of pressure.
"You good?" she asked as they parted.
Beca nodded. "Yeah, I think I'm good. Everything else has to wait until after the wedding. Which reminds me: you don't seem nervous at all."
"I'm a little nervous, but I'm mostly excited to start my life with CR. She's... my life."
"And you're hers," Beca said, smiling brightly.
"Yes, but right now she probably needs her best man to get her a cup of coffee up to her room."
"Ah, right. She's probably hiding there to not run into you... bad luck and all that."
Casey nodded. "Exactly."
"Thanks for the talk, Casey."
"Anytime... well, not anytime, but... you know." She smiled.
"Yeah, I know." Beca turned to pour a second cup of coffee.
"See you at the altar," Casey threw back over her shoulder as she left the kitchen.
"See you at the altar."