Inspired by Keymaster's "Tengu of Misfortune" over on THP. My first story ever. It'll probably be a short one. Enjoy.

However, while this story is centered around Shinmyoumaru/Youmu, other characters feature prominently as well, most notably Reimu, who's almost/kinda/not really a mother figure to Shinmyoumaru. In fact, this chapter has little to do with the central pairing, more with the setup.

But I'm rambling. Let me know what you guys think! Part 2 not coming for a while, though. Summer's kinda busy, but I might be able to squeeze in some writing time on the weekends.

Today was a wonderful day at the Hakurei Shrine.

Of course, given who lived in said shrine, "wonderful" didn't mean much. Pleasant weather, a decent amount of food, some donations...these were enough to put Reimu in a good mood.

It also helped that she didn't have to sweep the grounds of the shrine herself for a while. The newest resident of the shrine had promised to take care of that.

Reimu, sitting on the steps of the shrine, sipped her tea slowly and watched as Shinmyoumaru, having used a hastily constructed side hook to attach a broom to her bowl (Reimu supposed that using such a thing as a primary means of transportation did allow its user to know what could be done with it), flitted back and forth across the stone path, humming cheerfully as the leaves and other debris cleared in her unique contraption's wake. Though Reimu had originally been skeptical about the effectiveness of such an approach, the inchling had been insistent.

"It'll work, Miss Reimu!" she had said. "I promise I'll do a good job!"

Well, at least Reimu didn't have to do anything.

Shinmyoumaru, her duty done, unhooked the broom and flew over to join Reimu, who smiled and gestured to a tiny tea cup. Although she was still unsure why Remilia gifted a miniature tea set to her, it sure came in handy here.

Absentmindedly, Reimu reached over to pat Shinmyoumaru on the head, causing the tiny sword/needle-wielding warrior to mewl happily. Reimu let a smile cross her face. It was hard not to feel any sort of attachment to little Sukuna. Even I have to admit that...

Oh, right. I'm not in this story. Anyway.

"Will anyone come by today, Miss Reimu?"

Reimu shrugged. "Depends. It's hard to say; youkai drop by all the time for no reason. Not too many humans, though."

"Except Marisa." Shinmyoumaru frowned. "She's mean."

The shrine maiden failed to stifle a laugh. "Come on! She's not that bad. You're just mad at her because you lost to her."

"Am not!" The inchling pouted. "I'm mad because she shot a big laser at me even though it was already clear who'd win! She hurt me for fun!"

"Well, that's how it is. The winner gets to do what they want."

"That's not fair..."

"Really?"

Shinmyoumaru's response was a subdued grumble.

"Reimu!"

Reimu waved. "Hello, Youmu. Haven't seen you in a while...why are you here, anyway?"

The half-phantom gardener landed in front of the torii gate. In a serious monotone, she answered, "The Hakugyokurou cherry blossom festival, of course. You should know. We invite you every year."

Reimu blinked. "Oh yeah. Right. When is it, again?"

"In a week."

"Okay." Reimu looked down at Shinmyoumaru, who'd been silent this whole time. "Do you want to go?"

"Hm?" Shinmyoumaru looked up. Youmu squeaked; she hadn't even noticed the inchling's presence. "Okay! Hi Miss Youmu!"

"H...Hello." Youmu's face was noticeably flushed. In a voice not at all similar to her usual inflection, she added, "I really should be going, Reimu. Invite Marisa and Alice for me." She then took off quickly.

"Er..." Reimu stared at Youmu's rapidly shrinking silhouette in the distance. "Well, that was interesting."

"Who was that?" Shinmyoumaru asked, fascinated.

"She's Youmu Konpaku, gardener of Hakugyokurou, which is in the Netherworld. She's a nice person, but kinda... uh, what's the word? Naïve. Why do you ask?"

"She has a sword!" Shinmyoumaru enthused gleefully. "I wanna fight her!"

Reimu laughed before quickly disguising her outburst as a cough. "Uh, I wouldn't do that. She's rather strong..."

"Which is why I should fight her."

An exasperated sigh was the shrine maiden's reply. "Well, I'm pretty sure she has stuff to do during the festival, so you'll have to find some other time..."

"Actually, I think the festival will be a perfect time," a voice whispered into Reimu's ear.

"Gah!" Reimu yelled, startling Shinmyoumaru. She turned to regard her surprise visitor with a look of indignation. "Yukari! What the hell!"

Said visitor, head sticking out from a gap, snickered. Reappearing seated next to Reimu, she asked playfully, "Can't I say hello to my favorite shrine maiden~? And her adorable new pet?"

"I'm not a pet!" Shinmyoumaru protested.

"But you're so cute! I just want to take you home with me~"

"Yukari, you're scaring her. Can't you act your age?"

"Hey!" Yukari pouted. "I'm younger than you!"

"You're not seventeen, Yukari. Everyone knows that."

"Your pet doesn't."

"Actually," Shinmyoumaru began, "aren't you the Great Youkai Sage? Some of my ancestor's stories are about you..."

"Dammit," Yukari grumbled. "But anyway! I can arrange for Ran to take over Youmu's duties. That way, little Shinmyoumaru here can get the duel she wants."

Reimu's eyebrow arched. "And why would you do this...?"

"Out of the goodness of my heart, of course! I would never have an ulterior motive, would I?"

"...Okay, one, that innocent stare looks extremely creepy on you, and two, you always have an ulterior motive. Come on, out with it."

"Fine." Yukari's expression shifted to a flat one. She looked into the distance, where Youmu had gone. "To put it simply, Youmu's developed this weird...mentality. I'm honestly not certain how she became this way... she seems to have resolved to distance herself from others and instead fully absorb herself in her training. She's preventing herself from having friends, basically, and Yuyuko's worried about how this behavior might affect her. We essentially want to force her to interact with others, and the festival is a great opportunity to do so."

"That doesn't sound like a good idea..."

"Really?" Yukari looked back at Reimu. "She reminds me of you, in a way. Obsessed with becoming stronger, refusing to form constructive relationships with others...I can't say you lived a very fulfilling life back then, Reimu."

Reimu looked solemn. "I'd rather not think of those days. I didn't know better, though; I was still little."

"For her species, Youmu is but an infant."

"I know. I'm just saying you should let her figure all this out on your own. It's a part of growing up."

"Unfortunately, a part of growing up that she must skip. Unlike you when you were young, Youmu has responsibilities. She serves Lady Yuyuko and thus the Netherworld as a whole. I'm sure you can imagine the importance of such a duty. And also, she is quite impressionable and immature. You never had that problem." Yukari chuckled. "But Youmu really is still a child. It is dangerous for someone like her to bottle up her emotions and embrace solitude. We must convince her of the benefits of company before it's too late."

"Youmu's not immature, she's serious and formal all the time..."

"She is, yes, but that does not mean she is mature. I actually suspect that her aloof exterior hides a very kind and soft heart. Much like you."

Reimu blushed furiously. "Can you not flirt with me now!?"

"It's true! Right, Shinmyoumaru?"

"Mhm!" Shinmyoumaru nodded. "Plus she smells nice!"

Reimu slowly buried her face in her hands. "...Can we talk about Youmu, please? She's the one who needs help."

"Of course, my dear." Yukari giggled. "I wasn't lying. She really tries her best to be distant and detached. You were like that too; you still try to be, sometimes."

"That's a little unfair. Visitors drop by all the time now."

"And would you say that making these new friends has made you happier than you were before?"

After a moment of thought, Reimu nodded. "...Yeah. I see your point. You're worried that her current path will lead to loneliness in the future. I get it. But what does this have to do with Shinmyoumaru?"

"She has the best chance of befriending Youmu, of course."

"Me?" Shinmyoumaru looked surprised. "Why? She didn't even notice me!"

"Oh, but she did. You didn't notice her blushing? She found you absolutely adorable!"

"I'm not adorable! I'm probably older than she is!"

"But you're so tiny!"

"And tall people find me adorable because I'm short?" Shinmyoumaru was irate.

There was an awkward lull in the conversation before Reimu spoke up. "...Um, yes. I don't know why, though. It's probably in our nature."

Shinmyoumaru looked abashed. "Oh. I always thought everyone was making fun of me. But if that's all it is..." She stood up as tall as she could, a determined look on her face. "I'll do it! I'll fight her, and she and I will become the best friends in the whole world! Count on it!"

The effect of this bold declaration was completely ruined by Yukari's reaction, which was immediately hugging the inchling as tightly to her chest as possible. "Awwwwwww~! I'm definitely taking you home with me—"

"Yukari! Put her down!"

Yukari rubbed the sore spot on her head, a pout still on her face. "Meanie."

Reimu casually set her gohei down, Shinmyoumaru sitting on her lap. "So... back to what you were saying. Youmu has issues. You want Shinmyoumaru to get her to...open up, or whatever. I have no part in this, is that right?"

"Besides bringing Shinmyoumaru with you to the festival? No. Try to make sure that no one disturbs them, though, once the duel begins. I'll be keeping an eye on...other attendees."

"Any possible incidents?"

"Unlikely...though Seija's still out there somewhere." At this reminder, Shinmyoumaru drooped her head, ashamed. Yukari quickly continued, "It's not your fault, Shinmyoumaru. She tricked you. And if she tries anything at the festival..." Yukari's smile became ever so slightly sadistic. "I suppose I could bend the spell card rules just a little."

Reimu gulped. The only thing worse than Yukari when she wasn't being serious was Yukari when she was being serious.

"But let's not worry about that for now, shall we?" In no time at all, Yukari was back to happy/borderline ditzy. "You two enjoy your time there. Oh, Reimu, make sure to drink plenty of sake, too; we all want to see your dancing again—"

Shinmyoumaru looked up, suddenly paying full attention. "Her what?"

"Let's not bring that up," Reimu interrupted quickly. "Is there anything else we need to know?"

"Not much. Maybe come with me to the Netherworld tomorrow morning? I'm sure Yuyuko will want to see your pet."

"I'm not a pet!"

"Will do." Reimu reached for her gohei. "Now get out of here."

"Reimu! So unkind—"

Yukari quickly ducked into a gap as Reimu sent a Yin-Yang Orb flying at her. The shrine maiden sighed. Yukari was one of those friends that seemed to incite frustration more than any other emotion.

"...Miss Reimu?"

"Hm?"

"Why do they want to see your dancing?"

The sound of Reimu's forehead meeting her palm was followed by a groan.

"Reimu."

A grumble.

"Reimu, wake up."

"Miss Reimu! Miss Yukari's here!"

"...five more minutes..."

"Youmu just left for shopping duty. Yuyuko's expecting us."

"Miss Reimu!"

"...tired..."

"Reimu, get up or I'll make you."

"...make me..."

Reimu instantly regretted her challenge as several gallons of Antarctic water poured onto her face. With a shriek, she sat bolt upright, a simultaneously murderous and sleep-deprived expression directed at her most unwelcome morning guest.

"I'm going to f—" She coughed. "I'm going to kill you, Yukari!"

"Funny you say that," Yukari commented. "Since we're going to the Netherworld. Get dressed, now. We'll be waiting for you outside. Shinmyoumaru, come with me."

"Yes, Miss Yukari!"

After a few minutes and a handful of muttered choice words, Reimu stumbled out of the shrine in her normal miko garb, hair glistening and teeth chattering. "You motherf—"

"Language, Reimu!" Yukari looked shocked. "We're about to meet the queen of the Netherworld! Compose yourself!"

Before Reimu could deliver a reply, Yukari snapped her fingers, and the trio found themselves standing in front of Hakugyokurou, surrounded by the seemingly endless garden of cherry blossom trees. The smallest member of the group, having never been to Hakugyokurou, looked around in wonder.

"You should have shown her the front steps," Reimu said. Just to spite Yukari, she added, "Idiot."

"Time is of the essence. You know how far the steps are from the actual shrine. Not to mention how long it takes to walk up those steps. Plus, it's best for you and Shinmyoumaru not to stay out here for too long. It's rather chilly today...but then again, it's always somewhat cool here."

"Yukari! Reimu! You're here!"

A pink-haired woman waved enthusiastically at her visitors.

Yukari waved back. "Hello, Yuyuko! Sorry for being late. Reimu overslept as usual—"

"How would you know?" Reimu muttered.

"Do you really want to know the answer to that question?"

"...Never mind."

"Yukari knows everything about everyone, you know," Yuyuko piped up helpfully. "But anyway. Who is it, Yukari? Who's going to marry my sweet little Youmu~?"

"What?" Shinmyoumaru squeaked. "I'm going to marry her?"

Yuyuko looked around, confused. "Who was that?"

"I'm right here!" was the indignant reply. "Look down!"

"Oh—" Yuyuko stopped, fascinatedly staring at Shinmyoumaru, who slowly felt more and more uncomfortable.

"Um...is there something wrong?"

"You're so cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute!" For the second time in less than 1500 words, the poor inchling found herself face to face with a rather large bosom against her will.

"Help!" She cried to Reimu. "I can't breathe!"

"Yuyuko. Let her go."

Yuyuko pouted and hugged the inchling even more tightly. "No!"

"Yuyuko, dear, Reimu is very protective of her little pet. She might hurt you..."

"Oh, is this Reimu's pet?" Yuyuko placed said "pet" on the ground.

"I am Shinmyoumaru Sukuna, descendant of Issun-Boushi and last of the inchlings! And I am not a pet!"

"Is that needle of yours—"

"It's the Shining Needle Sword! It's the best sword you'll ever see in your li—I mean...uh..."

Yuyuko giggled happily. "It's alright. You're cute so I'll let it slide~" As Shinmyoumaru facepalmed, the queen whose tendencies were not befitting of her status turned to her longtime friend. "I'm assuming she and Youmu will fight at some point?"

Reimu and Shinmyoumaru stared. "How did you—"

Yukari nodded. "Indeed. Please inform Youmu that Ran will take over her duties for this year."

"Can Ran really handle everything by herself? She and Youmu usually split the cooking and still just barely make enough food for everyone on time."

"I hired two harvest goddesses for that. Besides, we all know that the food only even comes close to running out because of you." Yukari laughed. "You should eat less, or you'll get fat."

Yuyuko looked horrified. "No I won't! Eating is good for you! Uuu..." She began to tear up.

Shinmyoumaru, as one might expect, had absolutely no idea what the hell was going on. "...Miss Reimu?"

"Hm?"

"Is Miss Yuyuko really the queen of the Netherworld?"

"Yes I am!" Yuyuko responded cheerfully. "It's nice to meet you!"

"Yes..." Reimu sighed. "Yes she is. Look, let's go inside, shall we? It's a bit cold out here."

"Oh." Yuyuko suddenly remembered that they were, in fact, still outside, and that Hakugyokurou wasn't necessarily the warmest place in Gensokyo. "Sure. Follow me!"

As Yuyuko practically skipped back into the main building, Yukari trailing behind her with a smile, Reimu felt the need to clarify. "Yuyuko's not always airheaded. She can be cunning when she wants to be. Plus she's powerful; I mean, she can kill anyone and anything at will. Scary stuff."

"But why her? Couldn't whoever's in charge have picked someone else? Like Miss Yukari? Or another dead person?"

"First of all, making Yukari the queen of anywhere is not a good idea. As for another dead person..." Reimu's lips curled upward into a sad smile as she looked out into the distance at a massive cherry tree, the largest in Hakugyokurou's grounds. "Funny you mention that. It's not my place to say. Perhaps one day, not today, you should ask her about not only what she can do, but also why she does it."

"But—"

"Nope. I won't be answering any of your questions. Ask her yourself someday. Let's head inside. They're probably wondering where we are."

As it turns out, Reimu and Shinmyoumaru arrived at the sitting room just as Yukari finished talking to Yuyuko about the scheme. Or maybe the topic was something else beforehand. Maybe a completely unrelated scheme (everyone knew that Yukari always had too many of those running through her head). Only they would ever know, anyway.

"...I don't doubt that this plan will work. If Youmu really finds Shinmyoumaru that cute—which everyone does—" Yuyuko winked at the inchling, who had hopped onto the table next to a seated Reimu. "—then there should be no problem asking her to duel. There's just one problem."

"What, exactly?" Yukari inquired, though it seemed as though she already knew what the flaw was.

"You must realize that Shinmyoumaru will probably lose. You know how Youmu never holds back in combat; she is eager to prove herself at every opportunity. To whom, no one knows. Perhaps me. Perhaps Youki. Either way, if our little warrior here fails to put up even a decent fight, then—believe me—this so-called 'duel' will be over in a heartbeat."

"True," Yukari mused. "And chances are she'll never talk to Shinmyoumaru again. She detests people who overstep their bounds, and losing miserably in a duel requested by oneself would definitely earn her disdain. Bearing that in mind, Shinmyoumaru, do you still want to—"

"Of course I do!" Shinmyoumaru interrupted. "Who do you think I am!? I'm not afraid of losing!"

Yuyuko chuckled. "Well, that settles it. It's been nice to meet you, Shinmyoumaru! Come by again sometime, OK? I want to give you another hug~!"

Shinmyoumaru shuddered and inched (totally unintentional pun) a tiny bit farther away from her.

"Haaaaaaah!"

One slash.

"Take this!"

Reimu watched disbelievingly as Shinmyoumaru's tiny needle left a deep incision across yet another tree. Any doubts that she had about the diminutive swordswoman were pretty much gone by this point.

Marisa applauded as Shinmyoumaru, tired and sweating, collapsed next to Reimu, who offered her some more tea. "Wow! You're really strong!"

Shinmyoumaru gave her a dirty look that still looked endearing. "Get away from me."

"What?"

Reimu smirked. "She's mad because you used your Master Spark on her even though you were ahead. Really, Marisa, I thought better of you."

"Aw, come on. Seriously?" Marisa laughed. "It's part of incident solving. I do that to everyone."

"But she's little, Marisa. Come on. I can understand if you did that to Seija, but..."

"How was I supposed to know that Seija was the troublemaker? The Stage 6 boss has always been the main villain, and you know it!"

"Maybe the fact that she was the size of a human child and seemed to think she was tall should have tipped you off?"

"Enough!" Shinmyoumaru yelled. "All I want is some sort of apology, is that so wrong?"

"Maybe not...but I'm not giving one. I'm Marisa, after all!" As if that were solid logic. "What are you gonna do?"

"You...you..." Words could not describe how irritated Shinmyoumaru was. "You jerk! I demand a rematch! Right here, right now! I'll show you!"

The witch grinned. "You really think you can beat me? You're either really brave or really stupid. I'll prove it's the latter!"

"Well..." Reimu said, unsure what to think. "Today's a day of surprises, isn't it?"

"Indeed it is, my little Reimu~"

Reimu dropped her teacup.

"Yukari, I will shove my gohei so far up your—"

Oh dear, Reimu. Let's not finish that statement, shall we?

Please give me feedback! Any criticism is welcome. Flame as much as you want. It helps. It really does. Try not to use any racist or homophobic slurs, though. Those are kinda uncool.