- V -

(2277)

Part 3

Over the course of the next few weeks, Madison regretted her hastiness in attempting to prove a point.

Between their new objectives to locate a G.E.C.K. and reclaim Project Purity, Alex pestered Madison for further romantic exploration at every opportunity. Although Madison rejected her each time, Alex asserted that the kiss only proved something real existed between them, and it should be given a chance. Madison acknowledged a certain implicit connection that tied them together, but maintained that the age difference, her past relationship with Catherine, and the fact that she had been there for Alex's birth all posed obstacles to any sort of viable romance for the two of them.

And then, one day, Alex vanished.

Madison spent the entire afternoon and evening pacing the length of the Citadel laboratory, Project Purity and the Brotherhood's war against the Enclave the farthest things from her mind. She fretted over what had gone wrong during Alex's mission to retrieve a known G.E.C.K. in Vault 87, unwilling to take others' advice to calm down. Regret over her own standoffish attitude burdened her thoughts as she imagined the peril that had befallen Alex, a plethora of maddening scenarios only worsening her fears.

She did some reflecting during these hours of anxiety, wondering if, knowing this would happen, she would have handled Alex's advances differently. The answer only grew more convoluted as she went back and forth on it. On one hand, the original issues remained the same. On the other, something very close to heartbreak reverberated within her chest.

Three days after Alex's disappearance, the first piece of news made its way to the Citadel.

"She was captured and brought to Raven Rock along with the G.E.C.K.," Scribe Rothchild announced in the laboratory. "The Enclave hasn't indicated any desire for negotiations."

"So they've imprisoned her there?" Madison demanded. "When do we send out the rescue effort?"

"Elder Lyons already said retrieval can't be done at this time," Rothchild told her. "Our forces are already concentrated on the Jefferson Memorial. If we split them now, we won't have the strength to launch the assault."

She glowered at him, infuriated. "Then what are we supposed to do about Alex?"

"I'm afraid she will have to fight her way out on her own."

It took her science team and a contingent of knights to convince Madison not to infiltrate Raven Rock by herself. She fought tooth and nail for the Brotherhood to do something, anything, to save Alex from the Enclave's clutches. Her exertions accomplished nothing, for Lyons had already mandated the Brotherhood's objectives. Returning to Rivet City wouldn't have garnered very much help, either. No other faction stood a chance against the Enclave, and the one that did had already set its mission in stone.

Finally, after days of subsequent panic attacks, Madison had no choice but to place her faith in Alex's resourcefulness and endurance, praying that she could pull through and survive.

That prayer, as it happened, was answered tenfold.

Madison heard the series of explosions in the distance while striding across the Citadel bailey. She exchanged alarmed glances with several Brotherhood members in the vicinity, already suspecting the turn of the tides had commenced. Within the hour, she and the senior Brotherhood personnel gathered for a meeting in the laboratory. Reports had come in that Raven Rock had been destroyed, although the exact cause and the number of survivors had yet to be determined. Despite the lack of specific details, Madison breathed a sigh of relief.

Her intuition told her that Alex had orchestrated the entire event and walked away.

Another forty-eight hours passed, and Madison waited. She took to scouring the Citadel archives to occupy herself, having done all she could to help with the Brotherhood's battle preparations for the next morning. The war loomed on the horizon, and while Madison would not be taking part, her stomach twisted for the people on the frontlines.

One person, in particular.

The one who hopped from one dangerous situation to another, wandering alone, drawing the heart of a lattice that encompassed all.

The one who darkened the archives doorway after defying death yet another time.

Madison started when she spotted Alex leaning against the doorframe. She abandoned her research terminal and rose to her feet to gawk at the returned wanderer. Alex shot her an exhausted smile; singed, unkempt, and wounded, but alive.

"Hey, Maddie," she greeted, propping herself up unsteadily. "You won't believe the shitty week I've had."

Madison rushed over to her and helped to support her weight, wrapping her arms around the younger woman's slender figure as emotion flooded her chest. "Jesus. You had me worried sick."

Alex hugged her, held onto her, a thousand meanings in her teary chuckle. "I was hoping you'd miss me."

x-x-x-x-x

Madison scowled as she stood over Alex's seated form in the laboratory less than an hour later, holding her against her waist as she glared balefully at Elder Lyons and the Lyons' Pride a few feet away.

"You couldn't wait for her to visit the hospital before calling her to this briefing?" Madison snapped.

Lyons sent her a patient glance. "Considering that she is one of the people who will be leading the charge in the assault, no, we could not wait. Knowledge of our strategy tomorrow is of utmost importance."

Madison opened her mouth to tell him exactly where he could put his strategy, but Alex tugged on the hem of her lab coat.

"It's all right. I'm still conscious, so I can sit in for this."

"The fact that you aren't passed out isn't an excuse."

"Really, I can handle sitting around and listening," Alex assured her, tightening her arms around Madison's waist. "Just stay like this for me, and I'll be fine."

The briefing continued as Madison obliged her, a burgeoning feeling of belonging present within her breast.

Once it concluded, Star Paladin Cross, another old friend of James's, came over and offered to take Alex to the hospital for a medical checkup. Madison tried to volunteer her attendance as well, but Daniel Agincourt walked up at that moment to request her attention on some details of the purifier's construction. Alex waved her off when she hesitated.

"Go on. I'll come find you when I'm all patched up," she declared, giving Madison a soft grin. "I'm just glad to see you again, Maddie."

As Cross took Alex from her and led her to the exit, Madison could have sworn she had just been looking at Catherine's smile.

x-x-x-x-x

Madison glanced up from the documents on her desk when someone knocked on her room door. The late evening hour blinked on the console to her left, but she felt little fatigue as she stood and padded to the entrance. When she opened the door, the sight of Alex standing there in her pajamas struck her with a strong sense of déjà vu. This exact scenario had happened before, in a different place, with a different person, many years ago.

The parallels proved nothing less than confounding.

"Could I come in?" Alex asked.

Madison's heart skipped a beat. Those words… the exact same intonation… "Yes." She stood aside to allow the other woman entry.

Alex wandered inside and took a seat at the foot of the bed, mindful of the bandages peeking past her collar. Madison shut the door, watching her, trying to determine why this seemed like such a paradox. Something had changed while Alex had been gone. An unexplainable alteration, eerie yet intriguing.

"What's with that look?" Alex questioned when Madison's staring continued for nearly a minute.

"You just… seem a little different."

Alex quirked an eyebrow, although a mischievous gleam entered her eye. "How so?"

"It's as if you're channeling Catherine in your mannerisms."

"Well, considering that I might die tomorrow, I figured I'd give this one last shot," Alex drawled. "What better way to raise my chances than to emulate the woman you loved so much?"

Madison frowned at her and strode forward to join her on the mattress. "That's the strange part. You never knew her behaviors or mannerisms enough to be able to emulate them. But the accuracy is a little unsettling."

"Maybe a part of her lives in me," Alex remarked, growing somber as she reached out to tug a tendril of Madison's straight long hair, which flowed past her shoulders, out of its usual bun. "Might explain why I fell for you at first sight."

Madison gazed at the yearning in her expression, still dumbfounded over the twist of fate that had taken Catherine away, but given Alex in her place. "I really don't understand that," she said, facing to the side. "I'm old enough to be your mother. I was with your mother as an intimate partner. I was there when you were born. I'm the one who named you. I'm the one who held you when Catherine died. Can you see why I can't fathom a romantic relationship between us?"

Alex remained quiet for a while, seeming to digest her points. Then, lifting a hand to brush her knuckles over Madison's cheek, she murmured, "Then why is it that every time you look at me, something in your face tells me you want me that way?"

Madison shook her head, refusing to take the bait. "You have a strong resemblance to your mother. I just see her in you. That's all."

"So how about you think of me as her? I'd be fine with that if it meant I could have you."

"What you're asking is to be a replacement," Madison replied, pinning her with a fierce glare. "I would never do that to you."

Alex edged closer, even more persistent than usual. "You know, maybe it's time you moved on from her. She's been gone for years. But I'm here. I've been here. When will I be good enough?"

Madison sighed in exasperation, but her traitorous pulse raced when Alex's knuckles traveled down her cheek and over her neck. "Just stop, Alex. It won't work. We're not meant for this."

"You say that, but your breathing is hitched, your skin is flushed, and your eyes are closing just from me doing this," Alex told her, running her fingertips over Madison's shoulder under her tank top. "I don't care about your age, I don't care that you were with my mom, I don't care that I first met you when I was an infant. I've grown up. I'm my own person. And I'm in love with you."

Madison curled her fingers into the sheets when Alex shifted behind her and began kissing the back of her neck. Logic and reason flew out the window as latent desire stirred in her core. She tried in vain to dredge up a stern reprimand, grasping at nothing as her arsenal ran empty. Alex's lips felt warm and soft against her skin, enticing her to give in to the spiraling haze.

In a last attempt at rationality, Madison said, "We may regret this later on."

Alex only chuckled and reached around her to begin pulling off her top. "But we're going to love it right now."

Madison's self-restraint snapped at that point. Losing herself to her carnal instincts, she turned and tackled Alex onto the mattress.

Forgive me, Catherine.

x-x-x-x-x

She would never forget, never deny the lattice. Against her wishes, it had grown and caught her in its woven components. What was done was done, and she did not know whether she had passed or failed the trials. All she knew was that it all now hung by one.

One last trial.

A final test of the interlaced bonds.

Her fingers shook as she brought the radio's microphone to her lips. "Alex?"

Static filled the other end, but Alex's words carried over the interference. "Maddie! Is that you?"

"Alex, listen to me," Madison began, trying to keep her voice from wavering. "The purifier has sustained extensive damage and become overloaded. It must be started now or it will self-destruct."

Static. Silence from the two women standing on the other side, in the maw of danger.

"Did you hear me? Either you or Sentinel Lyons has to go in and start it."

"The chamber is filled with radiation again," came Alex's hesitant response. "Whoever goes in might not come out."

Madison shut her eyes and leaned her forehead against the radio. "I know."

More static. More unspoken things that would never be said.

"Maddie… I did some digging from my dad a while back. About you and my mom."

"Alexandra, this is not the time—"

"Hear me out. He said you proposed to her a long time before he did. She turned you down, but she didn't completely cut you loose, either. Couldn't commit, but couldn't let go. He said she tried to split herself in two, and you were willing to settle for half. Why were you so in love with someone that selfish, Maddie?"

Madison swallowed the lump in her throat, sensing the frantic stares of her science team and the scribes behind her, but she allowed herself the moment of conversation, untimely as it was. "She was a free spirit," she stated in a hushed tone. "When she gave a part of herself, there was never a guarantee that you would have it forever."

She had already identified the stark differences by this point. Unlike Catherine, who could never make up her mind, Alex knew what she wanted, and she went for it. Madison admired that, would have appreciated it more if history and circumstances had been different.

A deep, shuddering breath issued from the radio.

Madison's brow furrowed as her heart raced with dread. "Alex?"

There was a pause.

"I would have given all of myself to you, Maddie."

The frequency cut off.

x-x-x-x-x

Sometimes, things worked out differently from how one wished or imagined. Regrets made up a substantial part of human life, no matter the period on the timeline of existence. Often, lessons were learned through mistakes and opportunities passed over. A typical person had one shot to make the choice they could live with or willingly die for. Many times, the offer of a second chance allowed people to clear the slate and correct it. Other times, they would take the chance to do it all over again.

But sometimes, when the latticework collided, second chances were just too complex to accept.

Madison gazed down at Alex's unconscious form on the medical bed, listening to Elder Lyons describe the nature of her coma. On the next bed over, Sarah Lyons lay in the same comatose state. Both women seemed to be stable, their physiological readings indicating no permanent physical damage. Now all that remained to be seen was whether they would awaken.

"…So you may come and visit as you please, Dr. Li," Lyons concluded. "If you find that anything changes with either of them, I ask that you let me know as soon as possible."

She regarded Alex for a few seconds before shifting the pack on her shoulders. "I'm afraid that once I walk out those doors, I won't be coming back to the Citadel."

He paused, obviously taken aback. "You… are serious?"

Madison nodded, the pain flashing across her chest. "I'm just weary of the Capital, Lyons. And it's… not a good idea for me to be around her."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"It's not really something that is understandable." Madison exhaled and reached out to stroke Alex's curls for the last time. "I'm heading north. The Commonwealth is ripe with scientific prospects, I hear. If she wakes up and asks, you can let her know. But also let her know that I'm not coming back."

Lyons scratched his head. "This seems a bit abrupt, but very well. I have a feeling that she will miss you terribly."

Madison took a deep breath and rotated to walk toward the exit. "You can tell her I'll miss her, too. But don't tell her I love her."

Minutes later, she emerged from the Citadel and headed due north on her own. The decision weighed on her spirit, but it also seemed the right one to make. When it came to Catherine and Alex, she couldn't help feeling unfair to both. Distance was the only answer, but that wasn't to say it had to be the last time they crossed paths.

If our story isn't over, you'll find me, Alex.

One lattice she had laid to rest.

Another lattice she had left incomplete.

She chose to surrender both in order to find her freedom.

To become the vagabond she was always meant to be.

x-x-x-x-x

A/N: This used to be part of the previous chapter, but I extended it by adding more scenes and posted it as its own. (If you've already reviewed the end of the story, no need to do so again.) In any case, this finally concludes the fic! I hope some of the themes made sense as they came full circle, namely the overlapping lattices and the switch from Catherine to Madison as the final vagabond. Lots of allegories. I left it open-ended on purpose to leave room for the possibility of a sequel once Fallout 4 is released. Depending on how the timeline plays out, I may write a continuation of this fic centering on Madison in the Commonwealth. For now, this is where it ends. Thanks for reading!