TRIAL RUN (WITH IKO)

IKO: 31st of November, 126 T.E. This is a practice session for Her Majesty, Queen Selene – also known as Linh Cinder –for her first press conference. I, her best friend in the galaxy, will be interviewing her. Are you ready, Cinder?

CINDER: [deep sigh] Ready. Go easy on me, will you?

IKO: Not a chance! You think those reporters will go easy on you? You think they won't ask you the most personal, awkward questions? Ha!

CINDER: And you know a lot about personal and awkward questions.

IKO: The whole point of this exercise is to get you ready for that press conference. So no cop-outs, no silence, and no avoiding the questions!

CINDER: Yes, fine.

IKO: Especially not the questions about His Imperial Majesty and what you intend to do about an heir, because I've been dying to know about –

CINDER: Iko, ENOUGH.

IKO: Okay, first question: what will happen to the marriage alliance with the Emperor Kaito?

CINDER: Cancelled.

IKO: Why?

CINDER: [deep breath] The marriage was cancelled because it was something Queen Levana did in her rule, which I am not going to follow. She did it to further her own objectives and gain power on Earth. And she used a really sick form of – I don't know what you'd call it; it's not blackmail and it's not holding hostage, but it's something in between – she played on his selflessness and caring about the citizens of the world. Anyway, the marriage alliance is unnecessary, since I'm going to sign the Treaty of Bremen without any conditions.

IKO: Hmm. Selfless and caring, is he?

CINDER: Yes, quite.

IKO: But you aren't after legitimate power on Earth. You don't have ulterior motives for wanting to marry him, as far as I can tell, so why not just go through with it?

CINDER: Who said I want to marry him?

IKO: I do. Thorne did. Oh, and Cress did, she sees just about everything. She knows, by the way, that he likes you.

CINDER: Well, I don't plan on a marriage alliance.

IKO: No need to glare at me. Do you like him?

CINDER: Great stars, Iko, all I want is to leave Earth in peace!

IKO: So ... you do, or you don't?

CINDER: This isn't the kind of question a reporter would ask!

IKO: They might, though. Are you going to act like this behind the podium? Because if so -

CINDER: Iko, I don't want to marry him. Next question?

IKO: Do you have any legitimate proof of your birthright?

CINDER: [relieved sigh] Finally, a normal question! Yes, I do. My DNA matches with that of three-year-old Sel – Iko, pause the recording. There are going to be scientists on hand to testify, right?

IKO: I'm sure there will be. Anyway, that question's too easy. [clears throat] Why did you not know that you were Lunar? Why didn't the gift make itself known?

CINDER: [groan] Please, Iko, I've already got that explanation memorized. Don't make me recite it now.

IKO: [devious chuckle] As you wish, my friend. What do you intend to do about an heir? And will Emperor Kaito have any say in this?

CINDER: [chokes] Stars! WHY?

IKO: The reporters won't take no for an answer.

CINDER: I want to go back to explaining my stepfather's prototype.

IKO: Too late. Answer the question.

CINDER: Ugh, fine. I'm not going to think about heirs until everything on Luna is sorted, until I've figured this queen thing out, and I don't see that the emperor has anything to do with this!

IKO: ... 'I don't see that her being cyborg is relevant.'

CINDER: Of all the - ! IKO!

IKO: [hee,hee] That's answer enough. For now. What of your handsome accomplice, Carswell Thorne?

CINDER: That's for President Vargas to decide, but I hope his heroic deeds in the revolution will make up for his past crimes.

IKO: And what of the wolf hybrids?

CINDER: [slow breath] They will be put down. We cannot afford to use resources and time to contain such unstable and dangerous creatures. Special operatives be given a little more freedom, but they will not be allowed to Earth until they show that they can make choices independent of their wolflike tendencies. My friend and pilot Captain Scarlet Benoit will oversee the procedures.

IKO: Ooh, you're getting good at this. Now a hard question. Is it true that after His Imperial Majesty, Emperor Kaito, invited you to the ball, you spent – [squee] - seven minutes alone with him in an elevator.

CINDER: It's true.

IKO: ...Aaaaaand?

CINDER: Yes?

IKO: What ... were you doing ... in the elevator?

CINDER: [sigh] Politely refusing his invitation. Next question?

IKO: What happened when Emperor Kaito joined your Rampion crew?

CINDER: What do you mean?

IKO: After the elevator thing, and the ball thing . . . just how acquainted are you with His Majesty?

CINDER: Oh, NOW you're asking how well we know each other? Whatever happened to assuming we were engaged?

IKO: ...

CINDER: We are friends. Nothing more.

IKO: ... [heh]

CINDER: NEXT QUESTION.

IKO: Audio recording devices from the ball show you saying to the Emperor [clears throat] "Perhaps the queen will not accept your proposal, once she finds out you're already in love with me!"

CINDER: So I did.

IKO: Also, you kissed him.

CINDER: Your point is?

IKO: You could have just said that he was in love with you. The kiss was unnecessary.

CINDER: I had only one shot to convince Levana and stop the marriage alliance. I wasn't going to take chances.

IKO: Ugh, fine, there's no way around this. Are you in love with him?

CINDER: [deep breath] No.

IKO: Hmm. I really like this new body of mine, you know that?

CINDER: You - what?

IKO: I'm as human as can be, I have actual hair now, and I can do everything anyone can do. Oh, and I have a lie detector in my retina scanner.

CINDER: ... Oh.

IKO: [smug silence]

CINDER: [faintly] So ... when I said I didn't want to marry him ... and that we were just friends ... and ...

IKO: [singsong] I-have-a-lie-detector! YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH THE EM-PE-ROOOOOR!

CINDER: Goodbye. I think I'll take my chances with the media.

IKO: Wait, Cinder - ! Come back, I'm not finished! And what do you think you're – oh, you wanna have the last word? You want to have a dramatic exit? TOO BAD! [running footsteps] [calls from far away] YOU CAN'T RUN FROM ME, I KNOW THIS PALACE BETTER THAN YOU DO – oh stars, where's that recorder? – OOPS – UMPH –

[static]