"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
― Oscar Wilde

Chapter Sixteen

An infant's displeased cry echoed behind the door. A moment later Mrs Tonks stood with her grandson balancing on her hip. She urged them inside. She had similar facial characteristics to her daughter. Yet, the woman lacked the enthusiasm which had vibrated from the latter's changing eyes. Even her kind smile bore the shadows of a still broken heart.

Potter had stepped in first. He greeted the lady by a kiss on a cheek- as family would. The toothless infant gave a squeal of laugher as he was bounced lightly by the emerald eyed wizard. Once the little greeting ended, the baby rested its head on the teen's shoulder- as if attempting to hug his Godfather back.

He had never really bonded with Lupin's child. Whenever the baby was at the Manor, the seven-year-old went out of his way to be as far away from the little wolf as possible. Honestly, who could blame him? Little children were nothing enjoyable. They screamed for the smallest of reasons, needed to be fed way too often and required everyone's undivided attention. With the nuisance at home, everything was about the baby. Therefore, Severus had decided from the beginning, that he would stay clear of the mess for the sake of his poor nerves.

Now, however, it payed back in the form that the infant did not even spare him a glance. Oddly enough, Severus was disappointed that his presence served so little interest. Perhaps, his own aversion to Teddy originated from the strained relationship he had with Lupin. Regardless, the seven year old could not supress the bubble of rejection that swam in his chest.

A second challenge of the afternoon was to keep cordial relationships with Mrs Tonks. She was polite and gave him friendly enough smiles. Yet, it was apparent she was testing the waters of what was considered condensing and what was not. She shifted between talking to him like he was still an adult and offering compassion one would expect toward a child. Nevertheless, she had welcomed him warmly, like one would a close family friend.

There was an edge in her mannerisms, tone, and language that even after all these years betrayed her true origins. The slight Slytherine note to her every word brought however a comforting feeling. In a different way than Molly Weasley- less loud and with more concertation on listening, Andromeda carried a grandmotherly aura.

Not to be a bother, the boy sat himself quietly in the corner of the room. Harry fell into an eager conversation with the lady, which she lively participated in. The topics jumped from one update to the next, until finally, Harry slowly ended up sharing the incident in the market.

The Boy-Who-Lived shared his sketchy hypothesise of whom was the guilty. By the end, Andromeda held a troubled expression. Severus empathised with her unwillingness to believe the accusation.

''You are aware of the weight your accusation carries?''

Teddy played curiously with the buttons on the teenager's shirt. Harry bounced the infant softly, trying to sneak a spoon of mashed apple in the baby's mouth. They had eaten the starter already. With the main meal on the table, Potter seemed to choose his words carefully.

''I doubt I was the only person who had recognized him.''

How simple did he make it? His days as a spy would have ended before they even started if he ever dared to jump to conclusions with Harry's vigour. It was distasteful.

''The investigators will hardly attempt to be open minded. I've got the experience to know this.'' The boy had not been able to contain his frustration as he spoke up. It was one of the first serious issues he had voiced his opinion upon: ''Your explanations are lousy. If you have the wish to accuse a Malfoy, I'd rather you accuse Lucius.''

''I don't want revenge. On anyone. But we need to catch the remaining Death-Eaters, and as you pointed out before, they must have connections to evade for months.''

The jab was so clear that it infuriated the boy. His words used against him? He sneered across the table: ''Or they are on the other side of the world.''

''Point taken. Then who had arranged the attack earlier?''

''Potentially everyone.''

''Harry is correct.'' Andromeda broke their heated exchange of words. She eyed the two of them with a knowing, if not even reprimanding look. ''Regardless of the motive, Draco's untimely presence has to be explained as soon as possible.''

''I do not argue against the idea. Simply his methods are worth of re-evaluation.''

''My methods?''

''You want to bring Aurors into this. Admit it.''

It was so well hidden, nevertheless, he could pick up the disdain when Potter mentioned his old school enemy. Was such rivalry so petty? It did seem so. Judging by the silent look she gave Harry, Andromeda had heard it too, yet said nothing to it. Severus doubted the Boy-Who-Lived would ever admit he held obvious prejudice.

''Severus. Let's not jump to conclusions.'' Called Mrs Tonks. She said so softly, catching his attention perfectly. Her expression was not one of reproach, but of understanding. When Harry's attention was momentarily caught by Teddy, she nodded reassuringly, before giving him a suspiciously mischievous look.

Having occupied the infant's attention with a different toy, the teenager entered back to the conversation: ''No, I do not, actually. At least for now. I was wondering, what you both would say if we questioned M-Draco before anyone. Just to get an idea about the situation.''

If Draco was implicated willingly into this mess, then perhaps this resolution would have to be changed. However, that was a problem for another day. For now, Severus felt a pleasant kinship with Mrs Tonks. Potter turned out not to be a complete fool, because he rolled his eyes when he saw their satisfied smiles. The teenager said nothing to it though.

After the meal, Andromeda took Teddy to the adjacent room for a nap. The little wizard followed his guardian, as the latter started to clean. Not to be rude, Severus offered his help. The teenager gave him a mixed look. For some reason, he seemed reserved to have the child work with him.

''Take it easy.''

Severus had nodded. He made the effort to tip toe so as to make the least noise possible- he did not want to disturb the infant's bedtime. He knew well, from his time with Potter, that Lupin's offspring could be a real monster if he woke up grumpy. Nevertheless, small limbs with poor motor skills were a larger obstacle than he had anticipated. It earned him to be shushed more than once.

On the last time, however, it ended with a cup in pieces on the floor.

Harry was currently out of the room, waiting for him to bring the last items to wash. The seven year old quickly bend down to pick up the sharp little objects. Andromeda, who had obviously heard the crash, being just a room away, came to check. She held the re-awaken baby in her arms.

Quickly, the little wizard apologized. He hoped no-one would be crossed with him for the accident, however his stomach felt uncomfortably heavy as Mrs Tonks came closer.

''Are you alright?'' The grandmother questioned. Teddy fussed in her arms, however Mrs Tonks rocked him absent-mindly as her attention was focused on him.

''I am sorry. I'll just gather the pieces-''

''There's no need for that. Don't worry.'' It did not stop the boy from biting the inside of his cheek. ''You should have seen my daughter. She was less then brilliant at balance.'' There was some humor in the words. Her expression eased his nervousness.

''I'm sorry about Nymphadora. She was a brilliant witch.'' It was far from fair that the Auror was gone, when she had her family to return to. The turquoise werewolf might be a grumpy pain at the moment, and have people who loved him unconditionally, but that did not prevent Severus to feel sorry for Teddy. He would never ever know her.

Andromeda Tonks- how had that woman… well, she at least had Teddy and Harry and her friends left. Narcissa too.

''Thank you, Severus.'' Replied the woman quietly, a sad smile on her lips.

Andromeda balanced the baby in one arm as she took out her wand and repaired the cup. Unhappy with the new position, Teddy pouted heavily and started to sob. The grandmother gently cuddle him.

''I'll go put this little one to bed, and then we will talk more.'' She reassured him. Severus nodded back, thanking her once again for her help.

Holding the cup tightly, Sev rushed back to the kitchen. Though, he watched his step this time. He immediately earned himself Harry's attention as he stepped inside the room.

''Everything's alright?''

''I-uhm…'' The seven year old hesitated, biting the inside of his cheek. Should he mention what had just occurred? Well, it would gain him nothing if Harry found out later on his own. ''I accidently let the cup fall on the floor, and it broke-'' The teenagers eyes opened wider. However, Sev spoke before he could be interrupted. ''But it is fine now. Andromeda fixed it. She didn't take offence.''

''Good. You didn't cut yourself or anything?''

Who the hell did Potter take him for? His cheeks warmed up in anger. With a cold edge in his voice, Severus replied: ''I'm not a real child.''

Harry did not even take notice. A dismissing nod was all he got in return. The young man started to babble about some pointless subject, turning the conversation around. However, Severus did not accept the omission this time.

Courage building in his chest, the former potion master took a step closer. He crossed his arms, a familiar sneer present upon his young features. That finally caught the teenagers' attention. Dropping his voice, the raven haired boy spoke:

''I am not though. I have experience and knowledge above any child. Therefore, stop treating me like that.''

Visibly taken aback by the emotion on his speech, Harry raised his eyebrows high. Good. Severus felt both satisfaction and frustration that the famous Hero had been caught by surprise. ''Like what?''

''Like my opinion does not matter! Like everyone knows better than me.''

A sudden cry echoed throughout the previously silent house. Immediately, Severus realized he had practically shouted out his reply. That was not planned. Potter's attitude had made him loose control of his own. However, in the end, he had been the one to wake the baby.

His arms dropped to his sides, knowing the fault was on him, regardless if he was still capable to raise good arguments in this discussion.

With clenched fists, the boy wished, almost desperately, for this day to finally come to an end. Luck was not on his side. He should probably just keep quiet, at least in this way he would not get more on everyone's bad side than he already had.

''Go ahead. Scold me for raising my voice and waking your precious Godson.'' He had not been able to hide the resentment in his whisper. But it was true. He did not let Potter even start, because he walked out of the room.

Severus sat down at the dining table once again, gathering the last items he had yet to take to the kitchen. His fingers shook slightly from emotion. Picking up a fight with Potter had been childish. And rude too, considering he was in Andromeda's home of all places. She had not come to check on their argument though, probably deciding whatever had happened it was between them.

Turning around to get the last of silverwares, he noticed Potter had followed him to the door and had been watching him silently. His eyes were unreadable. The eighteen year old motioned for him to come closer. Severus did with dropped shoulders. He did not even meet the emerald gaze as the teenager kneeled down to be on his eyes level.

''How about we go talk on the veranda?''

''Now?''

''Now. No scolding, I promise.''

The boy was a little reassured by that. He dearly hoped Harry's patience with him so far would dictate the upcoming talk. On another hand, Andromeda was just few walls away. The boy could not make up his mind if he considered the notion more embarrassing or reassuring.

It was true children were initially selfish. He selfishly wished this was not going to be a difficult conversation. Self-consciously, he put his hands in his pockets and straighten his back, before following Potter.

While putting his coat on, the little wizard jammed the zipper the wrong way. His attempts to pull it up and down in order to unlock it failed. By now the boy seriously considered if he had not been jinxed. The timing left much to be desired, considering he had just demanded to be treated like an equal. He twisted his foot awkwardly. Un-wishfully, he was forced to admit he needed help.

He tried to get away with leaving the coat open, but of course the overprotective teenager would have none of it. The air outside was perhaps not one of the warmest, however the Little Potion Master argued silently that he would have survived without the intervention. He had still thanked the young man, quietly happy that he had Harry to watch out for him.

With that thought, the boy's mood fell once again. The threat of whoever was after them hung like a verdict to be cast by a supreme judge. He could not be certain if he would be allowed to continue to lean for support from the emerald eyed wizard. The prospect of loneliness, after being able to taste what attachment felt like once again, was a miserable future to look forward to.

He felt a hand gently resting upon his shoulder once they were outside. The famous wizard guided them toward a bench at the end of the modest garden. He turned his body to the child, his eyebrows put thoughtfully down.

''Severus, I know today has been rather tense.'' The young man stated slowly. ''I see also that perhaps, I did not react to all of it in the best way, especially when you are concerned. I was focused far more on my own agenda than how upset you were. Without meaning to, I ended up slightly… ignorant toward your feelings.''

The wind danced around them while Potter fell silent. He did not look finished. He was merely letting himself time to considerate his next words: ''And, we never really talked about Teddy either-''

''It's not about Teddy. I'm not jealous of him.'' broke in the child. He was not comfortable with where this conversation seemed to be going. What he was or wasn't allowed to feel would not be the point. Therefore, the former spy swiftly changed the subject.

''I know you keep tons of information from me. You cannot lie to me and then expect me to trust you. It just does not work that way.''

''I am not- I- Forgive me Severus, but I am lost about what you are talking about.''

''I know you are thinking of sending me away. I eavesdroped on your conversation with Minevra this morning. You cannot just omit to say anything and then go pick up books with me and have dinners with your friends! It's not fair to me. It is lying.'' Finished the boy softly.

He sensed Harry had become very still. Then, the teenager exhaled the cold evening air spontaneously.

''I should have thought of that. It explains why you were so angry with me.'' He muttered something more, it almost sounded like the teen was calling himself an 'idiot'. Yet, Severus shook his head in disagreement.

''I know the best solution would be to separate. We would lower the risk of them finding us. It is the best solution for everyone in this situation.''

The raven haired boy crossed his arms, breaking his eye contact with Harry. ''I am angry at myself. Rather than do what is best, I'm being selfish, because… I-I would like- I want to stay with you- despite it all.''

Of course, Harry Potter would not let him do the right thing and take the blame on himself. The young man gazed at him with worry, not that Severus knew where that came from. They were still to come to some sort of conclusion. The way his fists had tightened and how his chest felt painful indicated clearly that a quicker reply would be better than drawing his uncertainty out. He simply needed to know. Truth could not be worse.

''I can see why this really scared you. I would be scared too if I was in your situation. I know you had grown comfortable with me. When all of the sudden, there is the possibility of your safe space to be taken away, it became nothing less than horrifying.'' The Little Potion Master shuggered his shoulders. His face was painted by a frown. Harry asked him to look him in the eye. Nevertheless, the request was difficult to comply with. ''You were afraid to confront me about this, because suddenly I became the problem, and there was no-one else around you could tell how much this situation upset you.''

The teenager put himself again on the child's eyelevel, so to not talk down to him. He gathered the tiny hands in his own, squeezing them reassuringly.

''Severus, no-one will toss you around like a bag of potatoes. I would never hurt you in such way.''

And there it was. Such perfect honesty that it seemed foolish to disbelief. Yet, a moisture gather around his eyes as he sourly pushed the promise away.

''Minevra convinced you to take me in. She can convince you to give me up.''

''I volunteered-''

''But it wasn't your idea, was it?''

''Should it ever come to it that you'll have to quit my manor, which I highly doubt, I will not abandon you. On this, I swear to you.''

It was the promise of involvement and interest. This was the promise he had unconsciously longed for. Lily, to his own fault, had left when he had made one too many mistakes. Dumbeldore had used him in the worst way possible to fill his supreme agenda. His own parents had left him hanging without care when he was still a child.

He knew abonnement. And he feared it now. Harry had crept inside his heart. He had let the brat the power to hurt him. So many had before, both for reasons that were in and out of his control. Deep down, he waited, for Harry to simply follow the pattern and leave him for something that was considered more important. He was the one who choose others. Yet, he never had anyone to choose him.

Lily had once given him hope he could be chosen. Despite his better judgement, Harry made him feel a similar sort of feeling. He circled Harry's neck with his arms. The older wizard welcomed the affection.

''I am sorry Severus. There might be a thing, or two, I left out. I hoped I could get away with it without worrying you.''

''Of course you would try to get away with it about something.'' Rebuked the former professor in a hoarse voice. The effect was ruined however by him currently trying to get his wits together while clinching to the young man. '' 'promise you will keep me filled in from now?''

''I do. I should have been honest with you, rather than act overprotective. It did neither of us any good. I get that now. Can you forgive me?''

The child nodded affirmatively. Settled there in the backyard, the little wizard rested his head on Harry's arm. He felt soothing fingers pass through his hair, and a soft mutter that he should get a haircut…

Sometime later, Sev had finally calmed down enough for his voice not to sound like a duck. The cold autumn wind swang around the garden, messing up the previously arranged leaves. The awful dog still barked, but finally, even it had grown cold and wondered off. As he replayed the conversation they just had in wonder, there was one revelation on his part he felt the need to question.

''Am I in trouble for eavesdropping?''

''I'm not that strict, am I?'' replied the adult brat, giving his former professor a cheeky smile.

''You did ban me from potions for two weeks.'' Reproached the raven haired boy.

''How cruel of me. But wait, wasn't that for lying for two weeks about almost everything that happened when I was not in the room, repeatedly brewing when I was away -''

''Alright, I get the picture.'' he stopped the list quickly, knowing he was being lightly teased.

However, the teenager did not let him off the hook, as he smiled with amused eyes: ''And it wasn't even two weeks.''

Crossing his arms, little Slytherine regarded the other wizard calculatingly: ''You must at least minimally like to boss me around. No-one can be that forgiving.''

''Of course I like to boss you around. I cringe to think about all the sleep and meals you would have missed if I did not tear you away from whatever has caught your curiosity at the moment. You sure a passionate when you want to be.''

Severus mock glared at that, realizing but not admitting the truth in those words. However, that was the de-aging part. Surely, as an adult, he had taken perfect care of himself… most of the time… The boy shook his head, not in the mood to analyse himself of all people. He gave Harry an innocently curious look.

''So you are not crossed at the eavesdropping? Even if it theoretically could have happened more than once?''

That did earn a chuckle from the young man, breaking the last of tensions present: ''I am more than aware I have a very skilled spy at home. You are still Severus Snape, the wizard who tricked the monstrous Dark Lord for years, and scared every single first year he ever taught. Just, one third the height and one sixth the age.''

There was no true warning in the words. However, the fact that Potter would rather not have a person without bat ears at home went without mentioning. He appreciated that he had been pardoned without a fuss for it. Probably, the rather terrible day the two had earlier had influenced the decision. Though it cost him some serious consideration, the Little Potion Master made his own vow to try not to use those skills… consciously.

There was also another lesson to take from Harry's observation. An aspect of the situation the boy had fought against. Few hours ago it seemed unthinkable for him to even admit it. Yet, he finally came to accept a certain truth about himself:

''I'm a child.''

Harry squeezed his shoulder, with an unreadable smile on his lips: ''Yes, a terrifically skilled and bright child, but still just a child.''

How simple. And true. It seemed rather childish now: the extent to which he fought with himself against the very idea. His original childhood had been terrible, and he would have never imagined he might even slightly like the experience. Once had been enough. There were so many downsides to being so young: people did not treat you seriously, you were meant to obey, your independence had restriction and you were constantly told what to do. That is how he remembered it.

Nevertheless, he had been lucky enough this time, to gain something he had missed at Hogwarts.

''You want to know what you and Teddy both have in common?''

He suspiciously looked at the teenager. His slip of words came back to haunt and embarrass him. He raised his chin higher- as much as it was possible while still cuddling to the young man.

''Do tell.''

''Both of you are precious.''

He was speechless. It took him seconds, or may be longer, to recover from the impact those words had made.

''Thank you, Harry.''