Hello, everyone~ Thanks to some miracle, I managed to finish another chapter of this~

Please enjoy~

Fatigue was rolling over Kid in waves. He spent an afternoon and a night with the body, trying and failing to take control over it. From the very beginning, whenever he tried to enter, he ended up in the library, and he couldn't go anywhere else. Even if he had plenty to explore there, none of it would help him to take over. It was as if he was locked into a guest room (though it was a guest room with lots of information about the owner), and he wasn't allowed to go anywhere else. The body didn't listen to him, his commands were useless, so it laid, uselessly, on the bed, while Kid wore himself out inside. A mix of frustration, disappointment and fear creeped into him – yes, fear too.

His soul was at risk everytime he was in the library. The beast, if it even existed, that strange child, even Shinichi himself, they all could be dangerous to him. He knew that the moment any of them managed to control, to corrupt him, he could kiss his dreams of living goodbye. He still had a chance now, strong and clear, filled with human emotions that tied him to the world of living, but he needed to be fast. Eliminate all danger in that body, or look for another.

But, and this is where Kid's stubborn nature kicked in, he didn't want another. This body, it belonged to him. It was his right to own it, use it, to rule over it. He knew that he wouldn't be so lucky again, to find another that looked just like his old one did – it all had to be fate. If fate was just playing a cruel joke on him, dangling this new chance at life in front of his nose before snatching it away, he would fight and defy that fate. He had the power to do it.

But even so, he wanted to rest. Not in the sense of passing away, of course, just a little break, just the slightest bits of normalcy before he dove back in and started all over. He wasn't afraid of challenge, of change, he never was, not before death and not after it, but there was a difference between being a human and having to fight only humans and… well, being a soul without a body. It gave him a little relief though that what he considered normalcy was still mayhem to others.

It was time to organize a heist.

It was all just a nightmare, Shinichi thought. Oddly enough, he woke up in his own bedroom, on his own bed, as if all he saw, the jungle, that black abomination and the rest of the monsters were just bad dreams. He was still wearing yesterday's clothes – he probably just collapsed on the bed and fell asleep. His head did hurt a little bit, and he wondered if he really was getting sick.

It was still early morning, long before he would have to leave for work. So, after looking around, inspecting his room and deciding that everything was fine and normal, he went to take a shower, got dressed, and took his time enjoying his coffee. He didn't exactly feel refreshed, but it was still better than what he felt in the past days with his permanent fatigue and the starting symptoms of what was apparently going to be a cold. He even attempted to make breakfast, and though it turned out horribly, he ate his food with a sense of accomplishment. Ran would be proud, he thought, before the food suddenly felt bitter in his mouth. It's better not to think about that now.

So he didn't. Instead, he gathered all he needed for work and left the house. It was fine if he arrived early – ever since he returned, he tended to do that.

The sound of chatter filled the briefing room, as people gathered and took their seats. Shinichi stood by the window, waiting for the start to sit down. Until then, he wanted to enjoy the fresh air, and will away his headache. It appeared that the slightly good mood he had in the morning faded away completely, and it wasn't even noon yet. His still steaming cup of coffee did little to chase away the setting in fatigue, and he already knew that the briefing would just take more out of him.

The case that they were about to discuss had been going on for too long. It looked so easy back then, just a series of robberies, and it was all in the hands of Division Three. They were just about to catch those men when someone got killed, and Division One got involved. Ever since then, they've been chasing the culprits, but the more they found out, the more questions they had. Even with the joined efforts of the two divisions, the men they thought to be amateurs kept slipping away, no longer sticking to just thefts. As if they got addicted to blood once they tasted it. And it started when Shinichi was still Conan…!

"Ten months, huh?" As Shinichi turned around, he saw Takagi standing by his side. The man wasn't looking at him, instead he watched the other people slowly filling the room. "It feels like this has been going on for more than ten months."

"Yeah, it sure feels like it," Shinichi muttered.

"Thought you've been with us for only for five…" Takagi added with a small smile. Shinichi winced, annoyed at himself for the little slip. He also had to remind myself to be less casual with the other man – after all, he might've been friends with Conan, but not with him. It was a shame that Shinichi had to start all over, since Takagi was a good person. But maybe he still had a chance…

"It still feels longer than that," Shinichi said, trying to fix his mistake. Takagi seemed to buy it, as he gave him another smile, trying to comforting. It actually worked, if only a little bit. Takagi was just great like that, apparently, Shinichi thought.

"I feel a little worried, though," the man started, chewing on his lips and frowning. "It's not much, but… this is the first time they bothered to hide the body. I wonder why."

"They choose a rather odd way to hide it, too. First keep it in that warehouse, and then set it all on fire… There could've been many other ways to do it, and they would've been a lot more subtle. There's a chance that we wouldn't have found that body it all if not for the fire."

"But Division Three had their suspicions about that place already."

"No, they were too uncertain." Shinichi cut in sharply, before noticing himself. He sent an apologetic look to Takagi before he continued. "There were other places they were suspicious about, yet they didn't make a move…"

"We tend to be more careful than Division One," another voice cut in.

"Good morning, Hakuba-kun." It still surprised Shinichi to see the Brit there, even though he knew that he tended to work together with Division Three when he wasn't chasing Kid around, and that he was involved with that case too.

He was another person Shinichi had to start all over with. He wasn't that close to Conan, they didn't meet that often, but he still was back at zero after coming back. Their shared love for Sherlock Holmes was a good starting point, as their enthusiastic rants about their hero more and more often turned into something else and they got to know each other easily. But of course, it never was that easy, as Hakuba had the tendency to be suspicious of things and people. Namely Conan. Shinichi sometimes found himself answering questions that were aimed at the weakest points of Conan's excuses and Shinichi's explanations, and they were so carefully phrased that one wrong word and Hakuba could've found out everything. He often felt trapped when talking to the Brit.

To Shinichi's luck, the briefing was starting, though, so they didn't get the chance to talk more. He wasn't sure if he could've avoided all the traps laid out for him that day.

The beginning was just the usual – greetings and summing up what they already knew. Shinichi only half listened, saving his energy for later, when they would hear about the body found in the warehouse.

Takagi felt it too, that something changed. All the previous murders, they seemed to be done in the heat of a moment, with some animalistic emotion taking over the murderer. Blood splattered all over the crime scene in almost all cases, and the victims were often just mutilated. But the person in the warehouse, he was shot – and with a sniper rifle too. That was a sign of coldness, a clear mind. Either the body wasn't connected to the robberies, or… Shinichi shuddered. They could've gotten new allies.

"Yamada-kun, if you could." A man with sandy blonde hair stood up, and that was Shinichi's cue to finally pay full attention. If they called for Yamada, it meant that they identified the body.

"Yes. With the dental records and examining skeletal injuries, we've determined that the body found in the warehouse belongs to Kuroba Kaito-

A porcelain cup shattered on the floor, sending scalding hot tea everywhere. Hisses of discomfort came, and in the middle of it all, Hakuba sat with an ashen face. His eyes were wide and fearful as he stared at Yamada, though Shinichi had a feeling that he wasn't really seeing him – his gaze was too unfocused and unclear for that. Finally, after long moments of silence, he took a shuddering breath, and asked: "Are you sure it's him?" Yamada lifted an eyebrow at that, cleared his throat, and spoke up.

"Yes. Like I said, the dental records and-"

"Are you absolutely sure that it's him?" Hakuba gripped his left hand with his right tightly, and his eyes grew icy cold. His voice was weak and quiet.

"Yes," Yamada said after a moment of silence.

"Hold on, isn't he that boy that disappeared two months ago?" Someone asked. Hakuba nodded slightly, though it looked like he was just bowing his head instead. Another moment, and he stood up.

"Excuse me." And with that he hurried out of the room.

The briefing went on after that, but Shinichi often found himself looking at the gap that was Hakuba's seat. He wanted to go after him, but they weren't that close yet, and he wasn't sure if the Brit would appreciate it. Still, he knew that the ashen expression Hakuba wore would burn itself into his memories forever.

A few hours after that meeting, Shinichi saw Hakuba again. His face showed a deadly calm, to the point that it looked unnatural. His gait was slow and careful, yet he looked pitiful more than anything.

Before he knew it, Shinichi stumbled forward to the Brit.

"Hey. Are you okay?" Hakuba only blinked at him, as if he didn't understand the question.

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" And that was the moment when Shinichi felt immensely grateful for being able to hide how unimpressed he was. It was all just bullshit, seriously. He knew very well who Kuroba Kaito was, or at least what he meant to the Brit. He's seen how the other has been on edge ever since Kuroba just disappeared without a sign two months ago. He wanted to say something in that moment, to show support, to be there for the other, and yet, he kept hitting that wall constantly, the wall that was built by his return as Kudou Shinichi.

In the end, he couldn't say a word. Nakamori's angered shout that they both knew all too well echoed from the lower floor, and Hakuba ran.

A full day passed before Kaito woke up again. The gunshot that didn't leave a wound was a dull pain in his chest, and as he opened his eyes with a soft gasp, it reminded him of many things. He remembered that face, the image of the spirit who shot him. He remembered shouting, words that were thrown at him, and his own quiet voice, echoing in a place that didn't belong to him.

He didn't even know where he was, and he wasn't sure if he had the right to find out. Something told him that he wasn't so careful before, but now that carefulness was all that guided his steps. He was dead now, just like that other spirit said, the other one who was like him, who was supposed to be him, and yet… Kaito shook his head, slowly, with the pace of an old man, and he wondered if death can age people like life does. In the end he came to the conclusion that it cannot, because death wouldn't have left him there – death would, as it does with everyone, take him away from this world. He was like this because he kept on "living" after he died.

So he sighed and stood up, feeling wondrously solid and real again, something he hasn't felt in a long, long time. He looked around, with a small spark of curiosity in him again, and noticed that the room he was in was a place he's never been to before. It didn't look out of ordinary, neither magical nor otherworldly – in fact, it was reassuringly normal. The furniture – desks, shelves, chairs, armchairs – looked average too, in varying shades of blue and grey. The chaos and clutter on them that consisted of several sheets of papers, photos, discs and cassette tapes were a bit more interesting, but even those didn't suggest anything supernatural. Disturbingly enough, Kaito didn't see any doors or windows, or anything else that could be a connection to the outside world. And then he realized – in a place like this, there was no need for that.

With a sudden clarity, the events of the past two days came back to him, hitting him like a train, and he fell to the ground, clutching at his chest where the heart is, and his breath came out as ragged gasps. The fire, Kid screaming, firefighters and the police, cops prodding at the charred remains of his body, the boy who looked like him… And the moment that boy was possessed. He remembered that crazed joy-like feeling that swept through Kid at that moment, he felt it awfully clearly. Kid wanted to possess that body for good, to get a new one, to start a new life, to fulfill whatever foolish and disturbing mission he envisioned for himself. There would be bloodshed, and an innocent soul would have their body and their name stained by crimson just because Kid decided to be a judge. And Kaito failed to stop him. He felt something bitter bubble up in his chest, the feeling for once not coming from Kid. Frustration. His own weakness and helplessness, that's what frustrated him the most, his inability to save an innocent soul from possession. The need to fix his mistake gave him power, the will to break out and find out if he could still help.

The first step to help was to help himself, though, and to find out where he was. Even if it felt wrong to sniff around, he did it with a good reason. That's why he could stand up again and look around more curiously, more cautiously, the same way he used to look around during… He shuddered. Thinking about heists was not a good idea at the moment. He tried to focus on his surroundings instead, inspecting the walls and the floor too, hoping to find some passage. When he didn't succeed, he checked the ceiling too, but there was nothing hidden behind the plain faded blue paint. He checked behind the armchairs, then under them, and under all the other furniture too. That didn't seem to work either, though. The room appeared to be completely sealed and isolated.

Kaito turned towards the desks again. What could be so important that it would have to be protected so much? He stepped over to the closest desk, looking over the various pictures thrown across it. They didn't seem to be in the best condition, some of them faded completely from the white paper, and even the best ones were shaky and unclear, as if someone was really clumsy with the camera. Kaito picked one up to look at it from closer, but the moment he did, he felt like he was standing somewhere else – and like he was someone else's body, too.

The world felt so huge around him as if he was in the world of giants. He was outside, it seemed, surrounded by trees and… was it a playground? It seemed to be. The swings and the various odd things to climb on, all painted with cheerful colours and they gleamed as the sun shined down on them. His footsteps were swallowed by the wildly growing, emerald green grass. He heard laughter from behind him, so he turned around, and he noticed that his heart was beating wildly with excitement he couldn't find the reason for. He felt childlike joy inside himself, and that's when he realized: he was a child, then. It would explain the suddenly large world around him too. He was playing tag with other children, except… the things that were chasing him were only shaky, shadowy shapes, blurry images of what his playmates supposed to look like.

In that moment, it all ended and he was back at the room he woke up in, holding the picture with a dazed expression. He dropped it on the desk, looking at it with worry as if it just burned him. He reached out again, this time more carefully, and took another picture that was in a slightly better shape. And just like with the first one, it happened again.

He felt somewhat different, though. His body, again, appeared to be small, maybe even vulnerable, but the place he was at didn't look so friendly anymore, and the feeling in his chest wasn't a happy one either. He looked down to the ground, and saw a man lying at his feet. The sight filled him with so much terror that he couldn't even move. Fear gripped his heart, the fear of something he couldn't understand yet. To his left, another man was crouching, occasionally humming to himself, but always looking straight ahead with sharp eyes.

As if he was underwater, Kaito's mind supplied that the man lying in front of him was dead, but that thought was hard to hear from beneath the waves of terror that took over him. The sight of the crouching man calmed him somewhat, and after a while he just decided not to look down anymore. He stepped back, stubbornly keeping his head high, watching the buildings, the trees and even the sky.

He smelled something awful, too. His nostrils were just filled with it, and he felt like choking. A moment later, he realized that it was coming from the bright red pool under the body, and the tiny crimson puddles all over the place. Again, Kaito's mind tried to step in, saying that it was the smell of blood, and, again, it was awfully hard to hear.

Another person showed up, face set in a serious frown, as he approached the crouching man.

"Did you find something?"

"Nothing special. He was stabbed in the back, and most probably didn't see who attacked him. He didn't put up a fight either."

"Hmm… By the way, shouldn't you do something about…" He trailed off, as he looked at Kaito with an uncertain expression. The other man turned around, looking at him too. Bearing their gaze felt so difficult, even though he knew that they meant no harm.

Then the man who was crouching stood up and walked over to him, then patted him on the head.

"It's going to be over soon." Kaito felt some relief at that, knowing that he would be protected. He felt as if he was close to this man.

The scene ended the same way as the first one, so suddenly as if he was just torn out of it and thrown back that room. The uneasy feeling slowly faded away, as Kaito looked around, reassuring himself that he was fully back, and he put down the picture.

The other photos worked most probably the same, he assumed, and he looked over the sea of desks, all of them almost drowning in the heaps of different images.

Memories. They had to be memories, and they all belonged to the person Kid possessed, the person who looked so freakishly similar to them. All the things he saw, heard and felt in his life, they were here, collected in one room.

Kaito had no right to be there.

Surely enough, he didn't even want to be there, he rather wished to finally pass on, but it didn't make him feel less guilty about intruding. After all, he just gazed into the mind of this person he didn't even know, without their permission! He was lucky, both of them were, that he only saw two childhood memories that hopefully didn't mean too much. But what if he grabbed a different picture? A different memory? One that was personal, intimate even, one that showed that person's wildest dreams, deepest fears, what then?

And what if… Kaito gasped, and stepped away from the desk in horror. Those memories let him taste life again, and he… he wanted it back, if only for a moment. He growled and slapped himself, feeling angry with himself beyond measure. So angry that he could feel the phantom beats of a heart inside, thudding furiously, while his hands, solid, too solid, shook with unrestrained fury. Kaito gasped. This was no good. The anger turned into fear, that gripped his non-existent heart with an iron claw, and he felt cold, so cold all of sudden, while his stomach twisted into a dozen knots, and his lungs didn't seem to take enough air in.

It felt too real, too alive. He, himself, felt too alive. These feelings, they were too strong, too intense for a dead spirit like him, for a creature that was just waiting to pass on, all his emotions, wants, needs washed away. He was supposed to be pure, pure enough that the two of them, Kid and himself, would be still able to pass on, once the other stopped trying so hard to chain himself to this world. But he had to wait for too long, because Kid was stubborn as a mule, and now was feeling, he had needs and wants again… He wanted to live again…!

Kaito collapsed on the floor once again, overwhelmed by the revelation. He kept hitting his head, hoping that it would make all his stupid ideas go away, but instead, he just felt pain as his solid fists collided with his solid skull, and the hard floor hurt his solid knees.

MOAR NOTES~

So. I've made a few mistakes while writing this story. The first chapter mentions that the police already knew the identity of the burned man in the warehouse, even while just investigating at the crime scene. Which is kind of impossible, as the body was completely charred, but I didn't realize that I messed up so badly. Now the first chapter is edited, I deleted those parts, while changing nothing else. I'm terribly sorry for this, I hope that I won't mess up next time!

Thank you all for your patience and kindness, I really appreciate it. I can't answer the messages because of private life issues, and I'm sorry, but I hope that I'll be better soon so I can talk to all you lovely people. Until then, have a wonderful day! ^^