So, this chapter is dedicated to theonethatgotaway4 You wanted to know what happened it those two years. I've promised... Here you are ;) Hope you'll like it! =)

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So come on
Won't you give me something to remember?
Baby, shut your mouth and turn me inside out
Even though we couldn't last forever
Baby, you know what I want right now

I didn't even say goodbye to Biff. I felt the mixture of fear, anger and despair taking all the power necessary to make every cell in my body tremble without consolation. I didn't know what terrified me the most, to know that my friends had lied to me or to find out that Santana never married Brittany. I was frightened to know if I could have saved myself all this time of suffering and prevent Santana from hating me as she was doing right now, like had never done before. I needed to know if what I've always wished for my future would have come true if it not were for all of these things. I needed explanations, details, everything… why?

"Quinn! You arrived early! We were just getting ready to leave and–Quinn? You're okay? Sweetheart, it looks like somebody's dead from the look of your face–"Kurt tried to get closer to me but then I stretched out my arm to get him away, which alerted him and I could see that Rachel was watching closely what was happening. It took me several seconds to try to calm my breathing down, although the tears continued to fall down my cheeks.

"Quinn, you're scaring us, what happened? You know we're your friends and–" I slapped him hard before he finished that sentence. Rachel jumped and cover her mouth with her hands at what had happened.

"Friends do not lie to each other, don't they? Huh? It's funny, because I had always hate both of you, but, when I've decided to finally trust on others than myself… what happened? You betrayed me. You lied to me. You fucking made me leave my place and the love of my life to move in here with you. You hide the truth and made me believe that Santana fucking married Brittany! You saw me cried my heart out, let me be depressed all this time, knowing that the wedding have never happened! So, yeah, tell me now. Who are the friend you're talking about because I think even my worst enemies wouldn't do that to me" I tried so hard to stop crying but the moment was so intense I still couldn't believe that they would do that to me. I saw Kurt and Rachel trying to formulate something to explain but nothing came out. "

"It's not what you think, Quinn, please. Let us explain–"

"So explain! Because I'm going nuts here! I don't know what to do anymore! I told you that she was my boss and you still kept lying and acting!" My hands began to tremble harder and my crying was more desperate. Kurt and Rachel tried to get closer but I raised my hands up again in sign that I did not want to be touched by them.

"I've never thought that this was going to happen! Quinn –"

"But it's happening and right now Santana hates me and it hurts me more seeing that anger in her eyes when she looks at me than imagining her and Brittany living a married life. I had never seen that hate in someone. You don't know how awful it feels because you're not the reason. And, I-I –"

"Quinn, We thought that this was the best for you–let us speak, please", Kurt sat next to me on the sofa and cut me off. "You weren't yourself back then and you were always waiting for her and it hurts us seeing you like that. You worth a lot more and you deserve to be happy with someone who puts you on the top of his priorities, don't you agree? Maybe Santana needed that too, so she could see that what she was doing to you and Brittany wasn't fair and it was only going to end badly. You both needed that space. Maybe we should have told you every time she came –"

And that's when my heart stopped beating again. Santana came here to get me and they never told me.

What do you do when your heart hurts that much in your chest as if it wants to explode? How to live with so much indignation and despair? Just to think that Santana might have come to tell me that she had left Brittany and imagine that I could throw myself into her arms and start our own story …

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Two years ago Santana…

It took only a week for Santana to take courage so she could go to Quinn's apartment. From that last night together, she couldn't think of anything but her deep green eyes, her skin, the rhythm of her heart, her mouth every time she spoke her name. Her whole body. Quinn had totally taken over her thoughts. In that single week Santana and Brittany fought every day and every time they saw each other after leaving their respective jobs. They had never fought so much in all those years. Brittany demanded more attention for the wedding and wanted her to explain why she was so distanced and indifferent to her being that they were about to get married.

One Friday night, Brittany was asking Santana how the invitation card should be designed so they could send them after a few days, but she was still sitting on the couch trying to read a book that even her fiancé realized she never turned the page to continue her reading.

"I need you to talk to me, Santana! It is assumed that when two people are about to marry they are happy and–"

The Latina did not even hear what her fiancé was screaming at her. It was as if everything was silent, as if she was living in a lost and gray world. 'They supposed to be happy.' Was she really happy? Since she'd said goodbye to Quinn, she was never asleep as she used to. Her fiancée tried to seduce her again and again but she said she was tired and stressed out by the university. The truth was that every time Brittany kissed, she closed her eyes and what she could see it was only green. Not blue. She needed to see those hazel eyes and Quinn's smile again.

It was then, when Brittany demanded that she should show her she was happy to spend the rest of her life with the person she loved, that Santana made that click that she should have done it long ago, before all this had happened.

"Can't you see I'm not happy!", shee shouted throwing the book on the couch and startling the blonde. Her blue eyes began to glow and to moisten. The brunette guided her hands to her face without knowing how to control the accumulation of emotions she was feeling. She was exploding. "I'm sorry Britt, but I can't do this. I can't marry you. I love you, but is not enough" , with those simple words she stood up and left her house to go where her heart was. It had been years since she's been running so hard. It was very cold outside, but Santana didn't care. She needed to see Quinn, tell her that she could not marry if she was not with her. To tell her that she loved her. Tell her everything she always wanted to say but she had never dared to do it. She was going to fight for what she felt one more time in her life. She had never been a person who liked the changes, life's challenges. That was why it had taken her a long time to get out of the closet and claim her love for Brittany. She always did things that others would admire her for or what they always said she should do. She wasn't that different from Quinn on that point. But this time she was going to face all that, waiting and begging on her own mind that Quinn would tell her that she will always be with her. Waiting for the other blonde also to confess her love for her.

"Quinn! Open the door please! Quinn! ", She kept knocking on the door, smiling and crying at the same time, as if she were a schizophrenic person. "Please, Quinn! I need to talk to you! "She continued shouting and knocking on the door for another two minutes, until it opened. She was about to kiss the love of her life–

"Excuse me lady, but there isn't a Quinn living here. I've just move in yesterday", an old man opened the door and the smile that Santana was holding on disappeared immediately.

"W-what did you just say?"

And her heart literally crushed and that's when the storms began.

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She was staying in a hotel room for two days now and yet she couldn't found Quinn. She had changed her number and disappeared on every social media. Every time her IPhone vibrated her heart skip a beat, hoping it would be her and not her ex-fiancé. She needed to find her lover and spill it out everything she didn't say to her so then she could focus on her non-marriage. She should give it more importance to Brittany and try to solve the better she could the situation but her heart and mind were interested in another blonde.

During the first month, the latina went every day to Quinn's apartment, knocking the door and shouting her name and every time the old man tried to explained to her that it was true. He was living there and she didn't know any Quinn. The man was very nice and calm, any other person would just call the police at the second time Santana had appeared again demanding violently to know where was this girl.

Well. He got tired at some point and one night he did called the police.

Santana was very very drunk, pushed the man away the door so she could enter the place and search for Quinn.

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Brittany was the one who got her out of prison.

"I'm willing to forgive you for that… slip, Santana. I still believe in us and –"

"Brittany, I cheated! Don't you understand? You should hate me for that and not being all forgiving! Unless –"

"I knew you were having this fling with her", the blonde confessed and Santana just stared at her not knowing what or how to respond at what she had said. She just couldn't believe it.

"What the –and you didn't say anything?", Santana asked her and Brittany nodded her head with the saddest smile the latina had ever seen on her face. That killed her. She used to be the reason of every smile and sparks reflecting on those blue eyes and now… she ruined her life.

"I told you, Santana. I believe in our marriage and –"

"You let me cheat on you with Quinn all this time!", the brunette tried to understand her ex-girlfriend. She felt horrendous. Imaging Britt watching her leave their home every night she said she was going out with her friends, knowing she was heading to Quinn's apartment instead made her sick. She knew she was the worst girlfriend but she couldn't admit that she regretted what she did. If she could go back on time, she would do it again and again but, she would break up with Brittany. That would be the only part she would change if she could. If only…

"I love you and I know you, Santana. You know why you couldn't tell me about your… 'thing' with her", Brittany started talking and Santana waited to hear what she was going to say. "We belong together, San. We both know that Quinn is one of those girls who only care about herself. She's lost and is using you and soon or later she's going to get bored and –"

"Stop it! You're just saying that because you don't want to admit that she's the one that I love and n–"

She should have stayed calm. She should have ignored everything Brittany was saying and try not to explode. In point of fact, she should have known this was going to end badly, causing a disaster. She should have known all of this for the very first time. Actually, she should have made a choice that night she saw Quinn again two month later, after their non-wedding night.

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The third-time

She was sitting next to Brittany who was exaltedly sharing the news about Santana and her giving another try to their relationship. Santana wasn't listen to anything she was saying, she was drowning on those deep green eyes that were staring her all the time and she couldn't stand it anymore. So, when the latina finally stood up and excused herself so she could go to the bathroom, she was begging in her mind that Quinn would go after her. She felt guilty for wanting her other best friend more than her recently girlfriend, but she couldn't help it.

"Fancy seeing you here, Rosario", the brunette was surprised for being followed by the blonde. She wasn't ready to be alone with her yet. She tried to keep distance between them when Quinn began to approach towards her, but she failed.

"Tell me I'm not the only one wishing for a third-time thing, Santana", Quinn's lips were against hers and they were breathing the same air. Santana could hear her own heart going crazy as she tried to open her eyes and denied what her friend had just told her. "Because, I must tell you S, I've spent every night wishing that were your fingers inside of me instead of mine"

"Jesus, Quinn", the ex-cheerio grabbed the other girl by her neck and kissed her hard. Even though her brain was alarming her she shouldn't do it, it was what she most wanted since that night. And it seemed Quinn wanted to do that too, because she let her pushed her against the wall and she even helped her to get rid of her panties faster.

They just knew then, it was the start of something they didn't want to end it. Ever.

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Brittany went on a Beyoncé tour as her dancer and told Santana that she could stayed where they were living. She didn't care about the house anymore and maybe she would never come back there. So Santana stayed and started her search for Quinn. She needed to found her. It took her weeks to admit that she wasn't living in the city anymore.

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"Berry, this is the last chance that I'm giving you to tell me the truth. Where the fuck is Quinn?", Santana was screaming at the phone and trying to not break the remote control of the tv. She was more nervous than ever and her third Mexican eye was assuring her that Berry and Hummel knew where Quinn was staying, but they were hiding it from her. It's been two month since Brittany was gone and she haven't heard any news about Quinn yet. She called Rachel and Kurt every day for the entire month.

"Santana, I swear! I don't know what you are talking –"

"Fuck you! I'm not stupid, ok! I know she's somewhere and I'm going to find out and then, I'm going to burn your stupid shit hole where Kurt and you are living! You'll regret it! I fucking swear!"

Santana threw her phone to the wall and got drunk that night.

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After six months, Santana started traveling every Saturday for a month to San Francisco looking for Quinn. The first time she was sobered and almost brook Rachel and Kurt's apartment door. She invaded the apartment and began desperately searching everywhere until Rachel, Kurt and Blaine managed to calm her down and explain that she did not live there. When Santana was about to leave, she saw a flowered dress that could only be Quinn's on Rachel's bed. It was what she needed to re-activate her madness, but among the three managed to get her out of the apartment.

Lucky losers.

The second time, she went to San Francisco in the afternoon and when she was arriving at the apartment, she saw a blond girl on the corner who was about to take a taxi. At that moment, Santana had already drunk some alcohol, but she could swear that it was Quinn so she shouted her name but the girl never turned to her. After five seconds, Kurt opened the door to leave the apartment and was surprised to see Santana who immediately took him by the neck to corner him against the wall. Before she could hit him, a couple of boys were passing and immediately got in the way and managed to separate them. Kurt tried to explain that it was a silly fight between friends and convince them to not to do anything to the brunette or call the police.

The third time was a couple of days before Christmas. Kurt and Rachel were throwing a party on the apartment so Quinn could meet another people and made some friends. Santana could barely stand on her feet when she was about to entered the apartment, but Kurt and Rachel stopped her before Quinn could see her.

"Suéltame afore I endzzz you, dwarf! Quinn! Quinnie! Hey! What the–! Gimme the vodka back! Fuuuff youu!", Santana started yelling as Kurt and Rachel took her away from the house. She could be small but she sure was stronger than both of them together.

"Santana, you can't keep doing this anymore. Do you understand?", Rachel was trying to make her comprehend about the situation. She wasn't herself anymore and she needed to start her new life without Quinn or Brittany. It was about time. "San–Santana! Can't you just listen to me, please?", Rachel was trying to gain her attention but the latina was too busy trying to get the vodka bottle back from Kurt who was shaking it away from her side to side. "Hey! Just. Stop it. Will you!", she had to take the bottle from Kurt and give it to the cheerleader. She knew Santana wasn't going to pay her attention if they didn't give her the vodka, so...

"Thankssss", the ex -cheerio said and took a sip from the bottle. "So, You were sayin' Rachhh.."

"I know you, Santana and I can't understand why you're doing this to yourself. You're more than this, ok? Where is your big ego, huh? I know it must be hard to lose your two best friends but they're living her life right now, aren't they?", that was the first time the two brunettes looked at each other and Rachel could swear she heard Santana's heart crushed a little. So, she approach her and hugged her. Who would say she was going to hugged Santana Lopez someday? She prayed that sober Santana won't kill her when she remember what had happened the next day. "You need to move on. Quinn already has. She left Lima and she's starting a new life, away from you, discovering who she really is and you need to do that, too. And without them. You need to know who you really are without Brittany and Quinn", with that, the latina leave the city and decided she needed to see a psychologist, she really needed some help and maybe that could be a good start.

She did started the visits to the psychologist but still, she needed to make the last try and go to try to find Quinn. She did travelled, but this time was different because she was sober, a bit resigned and… gloomy. When she arrived to San Francisco, she decided to take a very long walk by her own. She put her headphones so she could listen to her favourite playlist on Spotify. After two hours of walking without destination, she did find the blonde she was looking for. She didn't wish anything more than run to approach her but, Quinn was… happy. She've never seen her that calm or… free… in her whole life. And Santana thought in that instant that maybe Rachel was right, they deserved to find out theirself first and perhaps, life would surprise them someday. It was when a guy arrived and hugged Quinn from behind when Santana flinched. She felt so stupid. What did she really expect? She was Quinn Fabray after all. What hurt her the most and infuriated her was seeing that she was better without her, and she wasn't.

She decided to never came back that place, then.

She tried every single day to forget her but failed and fell on drugs till she met Annabelle, who was the person who supported her on everything and she slowly started to find herself again. The redhead was more helpful than her psychologist. She was an amazing friend. Santana owned her the world for everything she had done for her.

"You deserve the world. You know that, don't you? Don't anyone let you think otherwise", the brunette said to her one of those night she finally started to quit drugs. They went for dinner and then Anna wanted to go for a walk and who was Santana to deny her that? After hearing that, the redhead smiled to her and couldn't hide the blush on her cheeks. Santana saw how bright those green eyes turned and didn't expected her to stretch her hand to take hers.

"Anna–"

"I know you still love her although you say you hate her–and don't give me that look because you know I'm right, Santana. But, you can't hate her forever, you know? You deserve the world, too. You just need someone to prove you that"

They didn't do anything that night.

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Present, Quinn POV

"Quinn? ", Rachel tried to get any reaction from me but I was looking everywhere but any of them as I kept playing with my fingers, thing I did when I was feeling nervous and trying to hold myself back. When the short girl tried to approach me, I immediately stood up rising my arms up to avoid any contact, as if it were to burn me. I couldn't stand anything from them.

"Don't. I need time to digest this before I do something crazy", I said and left the place. I needed some air. It was too much to take in. Suddenly I was feeling like the Quinn from two years ago and didn't know how to control my multiple emotions that were driving me more than wild or furious. So, I started to walk to the only place I wanted to go, to Santana's. I was hoping -maybe in vain- that for once the Latina would listen to me and somehow be kind. I needed to feel her close once again, and make everything alright. I wanted to live all those 'what if' and be happy with the love of my life. My body was craving for her kisses and her touch. Santana was the only one who ever made me feel alive and complete though we weren't together back then. I couldn't imagine how it would be to be with her officially. But, was it too much what I was asking for? I kept walking as my tears couldn't stop falling and my eyes were blurry. I needed to find some peace in my life at least for once.

I didn't know what I was going to say to Santana when she opened the door but, that I needed to see her that's for sure. So, I inhale slowly, trying to gain my composure back and waited outside.

It was time to make it right and face everything we've always been running from.

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So? What do you think? Let me know xoxo3