SPIDER-MAN: Of Wallcrawlers and Holograms

Spider-Man and related characters are property of Marvel. Jem and related characters are property of Hasbro. This is set in an alternate version of Red Witch's "Misfits Universe"- incorporating aspects of her fics, assorted comics, and my own Marvel and Hasbro fanfics.

Chapter 1: Parker, Do Your Job!

"As much as I hate to admit it, I, John Jonah Jameson, must now admit that I have been completely wrong about Spider-Man and his female cohort, the Scarlet Spider. As s- PARKER!"

THE DAILY BUGLE OFFICES- NEW YORK CITY:

"PARKER! GET IN MY OFFICE IMMEDIATELY, YOU SLACKER!"

Peter Parker roused himself from his nap and dragged himself into J. Jonah Jameson's office.

"You called, boss?"

"I did! Now, I've been thinking- maybe you've been doing Spider-Man photos too long. Maybe you want to actually break into journalism. Am I right?"

Peter groggily nodded.

"In that case, you're on the next flight to L.A!"

Peter's jaw dropped.

"W-"

"You heard me! I need someone to cover a press conference out there, and since Brock's on vacation in Seattle and McGee's covering those new Transformer things that've shown up in that area, you're the most qualified!"

"B-"

"Besides, you'll blend in just fine after you get a good haircut and a suit!"

Peter sank into the chair.

"When do I leave?"

"Tonight! I booked you a business-class seat, because I'm a benevolent man at heart. Unless I'm dealing with that Spider-Man- he can inhale my cigar ash!"

Peter nodded.

"I'm giving you the rest of the day off to pack, Parker."

"Boss, you never told me whose press conference I'm covering."

"It's Starlight Music's press conference!"

"Who?"

"Starlight! They're the record behind Jem and the Holograms!"

"Who?"

J. Jonah Jameson growled.

"Have you been living under a rock? They're the band who're bringing glam back!"

"And you know of them how?"

"My granddaughters are fans! Now get going!"

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

If you're wondering who Scarlet Spider is- well, it's a long story. This particular incarnation of the character is actually Mary Jane Watson (read my earlier fanfic Spider-Man: Partners in Crime for more details about that). As for everyone else- it's a similar status quo to my prior Hasbro/Marvel fanfics. So if you wanted to see Jem pal around with Dazzler or Jubilee, the Red Skull sending Cobra Commander a cease and desist letter, Grimlock taking down a Sentinel, or Magneto fighting Metlar- it's all likely to happen, and with characters who've already been established.

Also, this was kind of what I was planning to do with "Musical Illusionists" back during the original concept/planning phase- incorporate it into my Marvel universe. For the record, this was before I had even started on "The Evil Below" or had even watched a single episode of "Inhumanoids".

As for changes to the status quo:

Zartan and his siblings are now Mystique's kids (meaning that yes, Nightcrawler is Zartan's brother by another mother- long story there, let's just say that back when Nightcrawler's backstory was first thought up, Mystique was his father, but the Comics Code Authority put the kibosh on that idea of Chris Claremont's. And also, this means that Clash is Mystique's granddaughter- OH NO, I'VE GONE CROSS-EYED!)

Aja's a mutant speedster now (no, she's not Mystique's kid like in the pilot of eva unit 4's fanfics- here, let's just chalk it up to mutation by in utero exposure to chemical fumes.)

The Brotherhood of Mutants and COBRA are teamed up (Magneto gets access to high-grade military hardware and troops, while Cobra Commander gets his pick of superpowered goons- a win-win scenario!)

The Friends of Humanity want to rid the world of Transformers AND mutants, finally giving them a good reason to use the Sentinels. Speaking of, COBRA's looking in either acquiring a few or building their own knockoffs. Because Sentinels speaking in the voice of Chris Latta's Cobra Commander is awesome.