AN: This is my first fanfiction, so I hope it goes well. I've been reading for a long time and I've always wanted to read this premise, but it wasn't out there, so I decided to write it.
Pairing: Azula x Zuko, Azula x Ty Lee, Zuko x Mai. This is a Zucest/Tyzula triangle - mainly a Zucest story, however - with Mai caught in the crossfire.
Beta: FanfictionVillainess.
Warnings: Incest, lemons, mentions of child abuse and rape, a little foul language.
Disclaimer: Not mine, most definitely not mine, else we would know Azula's fate by now (what's it been, like 6 years or something?)

- Indulgences -

- by delictabledelias -

"I don't want to see her. Tell her I'm under arrest for killing someone or something," Azula moans from under her silky red blankets.

Zuko is leaning in her doorway in the evening, and Azula had only an hour ago decided to at last take a nap. She had blissfully forgotten that her mother is visiting, which is the last thing Azula wants to do when she is so incredibly exhausted.

Another head pokes through Azula's door and she groans loudly.

"She's sick, Zuko. She was hurling all night. It was kind of sad," Mai says and Azula just buries herself further under her blankets until she is just a small lump underneath the sheets of a mammoth bed.

Zuko then sighs, glances at his girlfriend, then back to his sister. "Fine," he says and Azula smirks underneath the dim red glow of her hiding place. "If you don't want to see her you don't have to. Go ahead and act like a child."

"Gladly," Azula purrs, her voice muffled by the blankets, and Zuko just shakes his head in frustration and leaves the room.

Azula remains there, eventually crawling out of her blankets and lying back down on her rouge pillows. All she can think of how her mother managed to show up at the absolute worst time; the worst time as in Azula was completely planning on figuring this mess out and possibly exposing Zuko in front of Mai, but then, lo and behold, her mother decides to visit.

She will not reveal it in front of her mother. Or anywhere near her mother for that matter.

Not that Zuko would tell her. That brings a tiny smirk to Azula's lips as she closes her eyes and winds up falling asleep, her pallid cheek sticking to the mattress with her sweat in the heated summer.

She closes her eyes and tries to fall asleep, although her dreams have been so troubled of late. Waking up screaming, waking up and needing to hurl up her guts.

Princess Azula is getting so tired of pretending.

Azula can feel the rain drenching her body, making her already cold, wet clothes stick to her body. She can feel pressure against her, against her ribs, against her abdomen, and then she looks around and sees that she is in the middle of the ocean.

Drifting aimlessly on a tattered raft, her lips dry, cracked and bleeding. And then comes the pain, the pressure on her body that she cannot explain. Her hands are on her abdomen, her lips opening and closing wordlessly. Speechless. Speechless.

"I'm here," says someone she did not notice. Zuko... Zuko and he is beside her, and she is... she is going into labor.

Panic... she breaks out into a sweat...

And then she is ripped out of her slumber by the back of a soft hand on her forehead.

"Still no fever," says Ty Lee's voice and Azula tries to go back to sleep. Her skin is cold and sticky from her agonizing nightmare. "You're really sick, though."

Azula contemplates briefly just blurting it out, but she is unsure how to voice it. She does not have a decent enough lie to temporary avert any invasive questions or prying. What she needs is her brother alone, but that does not seem to be happening with Mai seeming to have moved in.

"I'm fine," Azula says at last, although her voice feels weak and sore.

"Okay," Ty Lee replies, and it is very evident that she does not believe Azula.

Princess Azula is getting so tired of pretending.

Zuko was so happy to have his sister back. He realized many things in her absence, while... thinking she was probably dead. But she does not want to be home as much as other people want her to be. For four days, Azula maims, mutilates and raves.

But Azula gives up on fighting, clawing, scratching and biting on the fourth night, which, in Zuko's mind, is longer than he thought she could hold out. Being chained down, being prevented from bending even when she desperately wanted to, eventually wore on her.

"You are the most stubborn asshole I have ever had the displeasure of meeting," Azula snarls as Zuko has her handcuffs unlocked, keeping himself what he hopes is a safe distance away. (A safe distance actually being a few miles probably... perhaps the North Pole?)

She looks at her chafed hands and squeezes her eyes shut, painfully fixated on the memories, the memories that hurt so bad. Zuko watches, wary to touch her but wanting to ease her pain.

"I could say the same about you," Zuko replies and Azula just scoffs.

"This is some kind of game isn't it? What's next?" Azula says, her voice cracking slightly. Zuko does not know what to make of it.

Zuko's tongue flicks over his dry lips. "It's not a game. I'm going... I'm going to help you get better."

"Let's do a little psychological test for starters," Azula purrs, suddenly seeming so less... defeated. That worries the Fire Lord slightly. "This is a good one. Why don't we try it on you and see your results?"

Zuko just squints. "Uh, okay," he feebly replies, thinking there is a one hundred percent chance this is a trick or trap. She may be broken and worn down, but she is not harmless. However, he finds that playing along and being polite to her is going to get him further than having her chained down again.

"I'm going to tell you a word and you say the first thing that comes to mind," Azula says and Zuko supposes playing along might win him points and make her more amicable than she was when she first arrived here.

"Okay," Zuko agrees and Azula is startled. He usually has no patience for her.

"Dog," Azula begins.

"Cat," Zuko replies quickly.

"House," Azula says at the same pace.

"Family?" Zuko suggests, rubbing his neck at that one.

"Night," Azula says calmly and Zuko wonders what information could possibly come of this bastardized childhood game.

"Sleep," Zuko answers.

"Tree," Azula continues.

"Climb," Zuko bounces back.

"Light," she says and he wonders why her eyes are alit with anticipation.

"Fire," Zuko replies, the obvious answer.

"Mother," Azula says, the word slow this time, savored in her mouth because of the hurt look in Zuko's eyes. It was at that point in her own test that she started to resist.

Zuko falters before replying, "Regret."

And then Azula pauses. "Cinnamon."

"Fire Flakes," Zuko says, his heart relieved,

"Murder," Azula says very calmly, and Zuko looks unnerved by it.

"War," he suggests.

"Torture," Azula replies in the exact tone she used for tree, which somewhat intimidates Zuko.

"... war," and Zuko is confused.

"Rape," Azula says, this one spat, a little more feeling behind it but still a dull look in her eyes as if it doesn't disturb her. Zuko, however, makes a face of disgust.

"What are? These..." Zuko leans back slightly.

"Go on," Azula insists, still rubbing at her wrists.

"Revulsion, or something." This is a game. She's smirking.

And she hesitates for effect before breathing, "Incest."

"This is over," Zuko says harshly, gesturing to the guards who have been watching uncomfortably, eyeing Azula for an attack.

Azula shakes her head slowly as she is re-handcuffed and taken to her room. She's laughing as they take her, after glancing over her shoulder and seeing how queasy Zuko looked.

And Azula still recalls her answers because the doctors did a lot of nervous whispering. She didn't want to partake in it in the first place. If she weren't, that week, lucid enough to be able to answer the questions.

Her answers were: Cat, palace, dreams, fall, fire, fuck you, her perfume, fuck you, what I'm going to do to you, I'm done with this, my brother.

Their faces on the last one were quite delightful.

"Please come to dinner," Ty Lee asks as she is messing with a ceremonial blade she found shoved into one of Azula's drawers. She is starting to get bored out of her mind of late.

Ty Lee's job of the past four years pays magnificently. And she does like Azula's... company. However, neither of those things matter much when she is stuck in Azula's room. Watching the princess all the time is not agonizing. Unless she is just pouting for ten years, and Ty Lee has begun to realize why every single nanny Azula ever had has hated her.

"I don't want to talk to my mother, or eat," Azula replies, her voice muffled by her pillows.

"She's not that horrible," Ty Lee says, to which Azula sighs and harrumphs. "Azula, I'm afraid that my muscles will atrophy if you don't get up."

"No one is stopping you from leaving. It's not like you've never looked the other way," Azula snarls and Ty Lee rubs her lips together.

Ty Lee rubs her face. "I don't want to leave. At least come get something to eat with me, and you can run away without even making eye contact with her. Will you at least do that? I'll make it up to you."

Azula sighs before sitting up. "Fine. Just let me get dressed. I want to make her remember that I am younger and much hotter than she ever was."

Ty Lee frowns for a flicker of a second at that troubling desire, but she holds her tongue because she has a chance to escape. Azula gets dressed, and Ty Lee cannot help but watch her in the mirror. She is certain that the princess notices.

But she does not care.

"I'm happy to," Ty Lee says earnestly and Zuko is surprised. He expected it would take much more bargaining, even with Mai's tip that Ty Lee was itching obsessively for change in her life.

"It's not going to be easy," Zuko remarks and Ty Lee shrugs.

"You underestimate me," she says with a tiny grin. "I mean, if there's anything I'm pretty good at, its being unsuspecting, cute, dealing with Azula and stopping people from burning down cities or hitting my friends with chunks of sharp rocks."

"Right," Zuko replies. "When can you start?"

Azula sits in the dining room and wonders how she got roped into this. She genuinely intended just to get her food, make an appearance and disappear again, but now she is being served and listening to the mundane and frustrating small talk of her brother and mother.

However, despite her casual and shallow conversation, Ursa is watching Azula carefully as her daughter waves her hand a tad too aggressively at the poor man trying to pour her a glass of wine, and he hesitantly offers her tea, to which she seems to think for a moment, and then shakes her head and asks for water.

She watches the way she is walking, the way her hands twitch towards something that is not there. Azula rubbing her temples, looking somewhat disoriented, and her complete disgust towards her food.

And Ursa wonders if they all have decided just not to tell her, or Azula has not told them. Then she feels a twist in her gut as she wonders if Azula even knows who the father is but then she chastises herself mentally. She finds herself hating thinking anything insulting about her daughter, out of some insecurity. Half the time she finds herself rolling her eyes at Zuko and telling him what's wrong, but Azula, Azula she treads very lightly around.

Perhaps because Zuko's love is unconditional, and Azula's is very conditional. Not that Ursa feels she has it in the slightest. Perhaps because Ursa knows she is not nearly as welcome in this palace as she is in her home, and Zuko is the only inhabitant who attempts to make her feel wanted.

"Are you two still dating?" Ursa inquires, her eyes flickering between Azula and Ty Lee.

Ty Lee has just put a huge bite of food into her mouth, and her eyes widen with momentary panic.

"Something like that," Azula answers quietly. "Usually it's Mai and Zuko who get asked about that. They have been so reluctant to make a commitment."

Zuko nearly knocks over his glass. He has no idea what she is playing at, but he does not like it. He does not like the malicious glint in her eyes, or how he never knows what to expect from her.

What is certain, is that she is only pretending to be civil.

And within her, anger and discontent continue to simmer.

Azula examines Zuko closely, studying him with her lips slightly parted. He notices her gaze, and it gives him chilly, coarse gooseflesh. She is sitting in the living room near him, drinking tea as Zuko tries and tries futilely to make her believe he is on her side.

The small talk makes her want to burn everything to the ground. She hates him, how she hates him. He took everything and she will always hate him, but now she knows what she has to do. Azula holds grudges, and she is proud, but she is not stupid.

She knows sometimes fallacious niceties are the way to get what you want.

"Tea bores me, brother," Azula at last says and he stares at her for a moment.

"I'm on your side."

"You keep repeating that. But the more you say it, the less I believe it," she breathes smugly.

"You want me on your side, Azula. You need it because I'm the only person standing between you and some really nasty things that people want to do to you."

"Mm."

"What?"

"Nasty things," she replies, smirking. "Maybe... I don't want you on my side. Maybe I want you on top of me."

Zuko clenches his jaw. "That was a ridiculous adolescent mistake. I'm not going to hurt you like that."

"Pain and pleasure are such similar sensations." Another smirk, and he realizes that she is playing with him. He feels like an elephant-rat in the claws of a lion-vulture, and the more he wriggles, the more he tries to escape or reason with Azula, it only gives her sick delight.

He does know that he is the one with power now. Zuko has complete legal responsibility over his sister, due to her mental afflictions and the four nations lack of trust in her. But she still makes him slightly skittish, and he supposes it is something to do with just how twisted she can be.

Or perhaps, perhaps because she reminds him of all of his dishonorable acts.

Azula then pauses. "You never hurt me. If anything, I coerced you. I imagine I'm impossible to turn down."

Zuko inhales sharply at that. Her narcissism seems not to fade with age.

"I'm... I probably..." Zuko clamps his jaw shut. She is trying to coax him, trying to fish the words she wants out of his mouth.

"You're sweating. Are you scared or aroused?" Azula inquires mockingly with her nail in her mouth. He averts his eyes and tries to remember how strong he has become over the years. She unnerves him, and she likely always will unnerve him, no matter how powerful he grows.

"I'm neither. I'm frustrated," Zuko says coldly, glaring at his tea. She feels a genuine thrill being the only person who can make the powerful and dignified Fire Lord Zuko squirm like he's a child again.

"Would you like me to make you less frustrated?" she whispers and he clenches his jaw.

Zuko averts his eyes.

After dinner, Azula cannot believe she has just been left alone with her mother. She has allowed herself to be take into a parlor, although she feels dizzy and wants to lie down. But a vicious part of her wants to disprove mother's dear and condescending assumptions about her mental state.

It is awkward, awkward and silent, and Azula suddenly notices she does not have the sensation of Ty Lee's eyes on her, or Zuko's. It should be freeing, but it makes her feel like a child who can be trusted in this woman's watch.

Ursa clears her throat and Azula remains silent.

"Don't think I don't know you're pregnant," Ursa at last says and Azula's eyes flash in surprise. She has no idea how her mother could know.

"You've seen me for an hour at most," Azula says under her breath, not bothering to hide her contempt. "How would you be able to tell?"

"... well, am I wrong?" Ursa replies very calmly and Azula visualizes herself just choking her. Choking, choking, choking...

"No," Azula manages to reply, inhaling and exhaling to rid herself of her beautifully violent fantasy. "But I haven't told anyone yet and you better not."

Ursa touches her lips. "Do you know who the father is?"

Your darling son, is exactly what Azula wants to spit.

But she would not believe Azula. No one would.

"No," Azula replies coolly, before getting up and going to find her bodyguard.

Ursa rubs her face and does not know what to say.

Azula wakes from her nightmare completely paralyzed. She tries to scream and fight, her heart pounding and her body panicking and pleading. At last, she breaks free of the invisible grip and screams. Screams, and screams, and tears at her pillows until she has some semblance of control.

Ty Lee jolts awake and opens and closes her mouth weakly, unsure how to help. She just pulls Azula into her arms as soon as she finishes tearing up the blankets in her panic and rubs her back gently.

"I have to tell you something," Azula whispers into Ty Lee's neck as she takes a few calming breaths and tries to forget the brief and horrific experience.

"Anything," Ty Lee responds softly, rubbing Azula's back more passionately now.

"I'm pregnant," Azula whispers, swallowing. She expects Ty Lee to be angry, or to scream and shout. But she just falls completely and utterly silent.

"I see," she says, and Azula stares at her.

"I see? That's it?" Azula pulls away and sits with her chin resting on her knees.

Ty Lee shrugs, swallowing a lump in her throat. She knows she needs to be supportive of Azula, and she always did want a family. "Who's the father?"

"I don't know," Azula lies before picking up Ty Lee's hand and resting it in hers. Hesitation. She swallows.

"I watch you every second..." Ty Lee breathes, so confused. "Are you messing with me? I don't understand..."

"I probably... I probably won't even keep it," Azula breathes, feeling ridiculous, small and far from powerful. It makes her livid.

Purely livid.

And so she fiercely crushes her lips against Ty Lee's, digging her fingernails into her back. SHe attempts to force herself further but Ty Lee pushes her away.

The princess contemplates briefly striking out, but she is too tired, too weak, too sore.

Azula closes her eyes, but sleep does not come.

"Don't make me repeat myself. I told you that I'm pregnant," Azula breathes, she and her brother in the doorway, leaning against each other, so close they can almost taste each other. Maybe they want to taste each other.

"Is it...?" Zuko cannot even finish his sentence.

"Yes," Azula whispers.

"What do we do?" Zuko demands as he and Azula are leaning close to each other beneath the arch of a door. He has not stopped panicking since the moment Azula revealed her pregnancy.

It is his. It is his and he does not think he has a shred of honor in his body.

"I don't care," Azula murmurs, studying him closely. "I'm keeping it. Ty Lee... if she ever finds out that we've slept together, you will face consequences. She would leave me if she knew, and you know that."

"I have no intentions of telling anybody about what we did," Zuko says firmly and Azula can tell he is telling the truth. Why wouldn't he be?

"We'll talk about this in the morning," Azula says sharply and Zuko wants to protest, but he just sighs. Making her angry and then trying to force her to have a serious discussion is not going to do anyone any good.

She goes to retire beside her girlfriend and Zuko sighs again. He walks to his bedroom, dragging his feet, his heart and gut weighed down by the shame inside of him. He cannot believe he slept with her, that he touched her and did things with her. He feels like a monster.

Zuko has no honor.

And he needs to do something for the baby in order to alleviate some of the suffering he has caused. But exactly what, he has no clue.