She Who Knows

by rrenvy

Summary: Joanna is a girl reborn - originally from a reality where TVD is fiction - as an immortal sister to Elena Gilbert. Knowing as she does of events that have yet to happen, she doesn't hesitate to meddle, for the benefit of those she has come to hold dear. Based on seasons 1-3. Will be ElijahOC, though will start with a kind of DamonOC.

Warnings: Questionable language, violence, underage drinking, mature themes etc etc. Spoilers for the first three seasons of The Vampire Diaries. Also, English is not my first language (so feel free to correct me). No Beta, so all mistakes are entirely my own.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended... (Meaning anything you recognize isn't mine, including the few lines here and there that I've copied from the series. Which I hate to do, but couldn't really avoid.)

Genre: Romance/Drama

Rated: M, though I'm not entirely sure T wouldn't be sufficient.

And just a few more words before we get started... I've done some serious research while putting this thing together, using the tv series itself as well as the Vampire Diaries wikia as my sources. I've based my timeline on the timeline in the wikia. And there is a 'my timeline'. Because I haven't exactly been shy about changing the course of events. Some things will be happening a lot earlier in this story than they happened in the series - and very differently - and I imagine things might get a little confusing. If you think I'm not being clear enough about some things - or I'm being completely illogical about stuff or anything really - then I welcome you to point those kind of things to me so that I might be able to do something about it.

In fact, constructive criticism is always appreciated. Seriously, who doesn't love reviews?

I have a good 60k words of this already written - just waiting for me to find the time and motivation to nitpick through it before sharing - and I'm looking to you readers to give me an extra boost of motivation and inspiration to get this piece written all the way to the end.

I hope you all will enjoy reading this.

Chapter 1: Beginnings

I have long believed that what comes after death is not for us humans to know. And it was this unshakeable belief of mine that made me a favored child of Death and what brought me here.

I died, you see, and then woke up here, and somewhere in between I acquired this knowledge from an entity without form or words.

Knowledge that I had been found precious and worthy, because I was one of the very few who understood, felt it all the way to the very bottom of my soul that for those who die, the beyond has to remain a mystery – because I had accepted it and welcomed it, hadn't begrudged or speculated.

Knowledge that what came after death was eventual rebirth into another world, another life, because souls were eternal and only purged in death.

Knowledge that as one that now Knew, I would never again not Know. And so I would live forever. Because those who die, cannot Know, and those who Know, cannot die.

Knowledge, that because of the adoration – or the facsimile of it, the corresponding not-quite-emotion – Death held for me, Death had sought to grant me the new life of my dreams as best as Death had been able.

And I was touched, I truly was. I simply found myself doubtful whether Death had quite understood what my ideal life would be like, because from what I could see, Death had based my ideal life on a silly little comment I had made while watching a rerun of the pilot of one of my friend's favorite tv shows with her on the day of my death.

"I wish there were that gorgeous men in my life."

O O O

Let me tell you, it wasn't easy to figure out what the Hell was going on, what with the still developing senses of an infant. The situation wasn't helped any by the silly denial I insisted on hanging onto despite all the little things that quickly piled up. Eventually, though, I had to admit that it all just couldn't be a coincidence. To have a sister named Elena Gilbert, an aunt Jenna, an uncle John and to be living in a town named Mystic Falls.

I was living inside a tv show. No. More like I was living in a parallel universe in which all this was real.

I was the twin sister of Elena Gilbert. Fraternal, or so our parents Miranda and Grayson Gilbert had us believe. But I already knew Elena wasn't biologically theirs, which led me to compare myself to both her and our parents. The conclusion I had come to was truthfully rather shocking. I was obviously 100% theirs, but I could also see my old face looking at me in the mirror. I may have been born to a new world, to new parents and given a new name. But I was still me, inside and out.

Still, even after admitting to myself that Death had thrust me into a world I had considered purely fictional, I had refused to believe that there could be things like vampires and werewolves and witches here. But even though I refused to believe, I was still me, and I had always sought to achieve an analytical mind. Meaning that if there was a way to prove something instead of just having blind faith that would be preferable.

And there was a way to prove it. Well, not definitive proof, but enough so that I could lay my mind at rest for the moment.

Which led me to snooping in my parents' closet at the lake house while they were out by the lake with my sister and brother. I remembered that in the Vampire Diaries tv show there had been weapons and diaries hidden behind a false wall in there and so snooped hoping I would find nothing.

I didn't find 'nothing'.

I cursed and pounded my fist against a wall in anger and despair.

If my ancestor was to be believed, vampires did exist. Vampires were cool in theory but I didn't want them in my life. In our lives. Not when I knew that in a few years Elena and Jeremy would be dragged into the supernatural mess and no matter what I did, there was no way to prevent it. I wasn't naïve. I knew that even if I somehow kept Elena from the Salvatores, eventually shit would go down and word of the new doppelgänger would reach Klaus. And Elena would die.

I remembered her – our – parents would be dead by then, some kind of an accident, but I couldn't remember any useful detail. The Vampire Diaries had never been my obsession, but that of my best friend's. I hadn't committed every little detail to memory and it had already been more than a decade since I'd last watched the show. More than a decade since I had been born into this new life. Details had slipped me in my refusal to acknowledge that this insanity was now my life.

I was regretting it now.

It took me a while, but eventually I decided I had no choice but to live my life. I would naturally try to protect my family, but I wasn't all-knowing. I wasn't all-powerful. I was still human, though immortal as I now might be. All I could do, was to do my best and that would have to be enough.

In the spirit of living my life, I had begun to put some serious effort into school, and more importantly: into learning. That might not sound like living to you, but in my old life, I had really wanted to become a doctor. I had always found humans as a whole interesting and to study medicine would have been a dream come true. Alas I had been born into a poor family and there was no time or money for me to fulfill my dream.

That wasn't the case here. The Gilbert family was one of the founding families of Mystic Falls and quite well off. Grayson – my father – was a doctor and overjoyed when I began to show interest in learning medicine. He and my mother were more than supportive of my ambitions and sought to do all they could to assist me in my goal. Any related books and materials I wanted they bought for me, and later gave me a special allowance for. And after I turned sixteen and received my driver's license, I could pretty much go anywhere I wanted without curfew as long as I kept my phone on me and kept them updated on where I was. It was great. They were great.

But not everything was so.

My extracurricular studies had slowly driven a wedge between my 'twin' sister and I. We still loved each other, but we were no longer as inseparable as we had been. I liked this development, but she didn't. I realized, of course, that for a child used to being glued to someone, drifting apart like that is painful, and she was a child. I wasn't and I knew I couldn't live much longer holding her hand. I had been feeling stifled for a while by then and when my studies led me to spend more and more time away from her, I didn't fight it. I cherished it. I did sometimes miss her and the way we'd been, but I knew it was better this way.

And then our parents died. They drove off a bridge with Elena with them in the car. She was the only survivor.

I had known it was coming. I had known, but there was nothing I could do because I hadn't known how or when. And if there had been guilt in me, I had buried it deep.

I spent the following couple of months mostly at home, just being there for Elena, Jeremy and Jenna, who had moved to live with us as our guardian. Elena was depressed and felt guilty for what had happened. I told her over and over that no one blamed her and she shouldn't either. Jeremy had resorted to alcohol and drugs to drown the pain and I tried to be the one person in our family that didn't judge him for it. Jenna was distracting herself from the sorrow of losing her sister by focusing on stressing about how to look after the three of us. I told her she was doing fine and that we would be fine. We weren't little kids anymore.

And eventually we were fine. It still hurt, but we were slowly adjusting to the loss and after a couple of months of grieving, I returned back to my usual schedule of spending my weekends away from Mystic Falls.

Of course, as far as Jenna knew – as far as Miranda and Grayson had known – I was simply spending my weekends at a friend's, who helped me study. I did study, mostly at the large library and at cafes and such, enjoying the fact that I wasn't known here, like I was at the small town of Mystic Falls, but there was no particular friend. Oh, there were many friends, but they weren't helping me with education in mind, though I learned loads.

My Saturday nights were spent in a bar and Sunday mornings in the bed of a man. And rarely the same man twice in a row. I had some repeat lovers, but frankly, I spent my Saturday nights looking for release after a week of studying hard and I just wanted to let loose.

This less moral side of my life I had been careful to keep secret from my family and from everyone from Mystic Falls. There I was Joanna Gilbert, age seventeen, the bookworm. And here… Joanna Johnson, age twenty-two, the chick who parties hard.

I had been successful in keeping these two lives separate so far, but I could see that going down the drain the moment he sat down next to me at the bar one night – the weekend before the start of term – and after ordering a bourbon for himself, turned to me and asked: "What's a pretty young thing like you doing in a place like this all by your lonesome?"

Slowly, I turned to look at him. God, he was even better looking than I remembered. Or perhaps the tv show had done him no justice. I would have thought to find the cocky smirk annoying but on a face like that, it was well deserved. I gave him a blatant once over and idly decided I would very much like to get my hands on what lay underneath the layers of black. "Looking for company, what else?" I replied and then asked: "Passing through?" He shot me a raised eyebrow and I told him: "I haven't seen you around here before."

"Then yes, I am passing through", he replied, "I'm on my way to visit family in Mystic Falls."

As much as I didn't like it, I realized there was no way we wouldn't run into each other in Mystic Falls, so there was no sense in trying to hide it. "Really? Look at that, I happen to live there."

He looked at me surprised, "You're from Mystic Falls?"

"Yeah", I confirmed, "I just like to spend my weekends here." I took a gulp of the drink I'd been nursing. "So who are you visiting?"

"My uncle, Zach Salvatore", he answered and then blinked, "How rude of me." He offered me his hand. "Damon Salvatore."

I took his hand and shook it briefly as I replied: "Joanna."

"Joanna...?" He repeated with an expectant tone.

I leant towards him slightly and lowly said: "Ask me again in Mystic Falls and I'll tell you. The most you'll get from me here is a lie."

He eyed me curiously, clearly trying to figure out what I meant and to my surprise he did. He smirked deviously, "You're underage and here with a fake id?" I just gave him a pointed look, refusing to admit to anything. But he knew he'd got me. "Go you!" He chuckled and then commented: "Explains why you're drinking at a bar here instead of somewhere closer to home. I imagine Mystic Falls is still an everyone-knows-everyone kind of place."

I pouted, "That it is. Also, fairly judgmental. I would rather avoid the stamp of the town tramp."

"Oh?" Damon looked at me in question.

"I like sex as much as the next person, but I've no interest in having a boyfriend. Not to mention my taste runs towards men, not boys my age", I explained. Honestly, the very thought of having anything with a guy 'my age' grossed me out. I may only be seventeen in this life but I had been older in my old life. The boys my age were just that. Boys.

"So you come here, away from the people who know you and seduce men into your bed?" Damon asked with a suggestive smirk.

I met his smirk with mine and corrected: "No. I seduce my way into their beds. I rarely even bother to rent a room for myself when I'm here."

He gave me a long look and then commented: "I have a room."

"And a bed, I imagine", I airily added, "Not that one is necessarily required."

He threw back the last of his bourbon, stood and offered me his hand. I placed my hand in his and slid off the chair. He led me out of the bar and I followed, wondering what happened to my determination to stay away from vampires all other things supernatural.

His motel wasn't far, in fact, it was the same place I liked to use when I needed a room for the night. It was cheap and totally unimpressive, but it served its purpose.

The moment the door closed behind us, his mouth was on mine and he was backing me to the wall behind me. His hands framed my face as he pulled back slightly and locked his impossibly clear eyes with my blue-gray ones. "I don't want you to scream, okay?" He said lowly, his pupils dilating strangely and I knew he was trying to compel me. 'Trying' being the operative word.

I decided playing ignorant would serve me best and chuckled, "My, what confidence you have in your sexual prowess. I'll have you know I haven't yet met a guy who could make me outright scream." He blinked in surprise, realizing his compulsion hadn't stuck. I noticed him have a quick glance at my wrists, checking for vervain-filled jewelry and finding none that might fit the bill. I wasn't wearing a necklace either and my earrings were too flat for any hidden compartments.

"Well, I am an exceptional lover", the vampire somewhat absently commented. I could see him fighting a frown. I imagine his compulsion not working on me had put a wrinkle on his plans for making a meal out of me. Of course he could still decide to drain me to death, but I figured he would conclude that if I wasn't wearing vervain then I had to have ingested some. Which would make my blood very unpleasant for him.

I bit my lip lightly, tilted my head suggestively and said: "How about I be the judge of that?"

When the morning came, I had to admit that he truly was rather exceptional and I knew that I wouldn't be able to resist visiting his bed again, should the opportunity arise.

O O O

Monday, start of term, and Elena was practically hanging onto my arm, using me as a pillar of support. She'd been much the same before the summer, after our parents had died, but I had thought I had rehabilitated her from the habit during the last month or two. Apparently not.

We were outside the school office – Elena, Bonnie and I – when our not-yet-very-witchy friend said: "Hold up. Who's this?"

Elena turned to look at what she was seeing and shrugged, "All I see is back."

"It's a hot back", Bonnie pointed out.

I rolled my eyes, "Have you developed x-ray vision with those psychic talents of yours, because all I see is a back covered by a loosely hanging leather jacket."

"Shush!" She told me mock sharply, "You're asexual, of course you don't see it." Yeah… For some reason everyone had decided I had to be asexual since I had never showed any interest towards any of my peers, or anyone else in Mystic Falls. I had stopped arguing with them ages ago, since I couldn't really tell them I saw them all as children. God, was I glad I was finally starting to look like a full grown adult and could hunt for company among the older people without attracting pedophiles and the like.

Jeremy walked by and we heard some boy congratulate him about a 'good batch'. Naturally Elena couldn't let it slide and dashed after our brother. Into the men's bathroom. I decided to keep out of it and shaking my head in exasperation began wading through the crowded hallways towards my first class.

The day went by slowly, school days often did. I was ahead in most subjects – thanks mostly to having gone through high school once already – and thus vastly bored in class. Luckily most teachers were used to and tolerant about letting me study whatever and ignore the actual topic of the lessons as long as what I was studying was at least somewhat related to the subject they taught.

After school I went home and sometime later Elena came over to my room, "Hey Jo, could you help me batch up my leg? I sort of tripped while I was visiting the grave yard…"

I frowned up at her from where I was lying on my bed with a book on biochemistry. Then I glanced down at where her trouser leg was rolled up, revealing a rather nasty cut. "Ouch", I winced in sympathy and heaved myself up. "That can't feel too good." I grabbed her by the hand and pulled her into the bathroom. We had a pretty extensive first aid kit below the sink and it was coming in handy. I sat her down on the toilet seat and quickly cleaned the wound before bandaging it.

After I had begun to show interest in medicine, Grayson had taught me first aid and Miranda had begun to let me deal with all the scrapes and cuts my siblings procured. It was good practical experience for me, simple little things though it was, and had the benefit of keeping my parents from noticing how all of my little injuries healed over in no time at all. I had noticed the speed I healed had been getting faster and faster as the years went by, from nearly normal to healing in minutes. It also seemed like the bigger the injury, the quicker it healed. In any case, if this development kept up, in a few years all my injuries would heal over in an instant.

"I'm going to meet Bonnie and Caroline at the Grill", she told me as I was putting the kit away. "Would you like to come?" Her tone was hopeful, but she already knew what my answer was likely to be.

"Some other time", I replied. She wasn't surprised. "I'm sort of in the middle of something interesting."

She rolled her eyes, "When aren't you ever?"

O O O

The next evening there was a back to school party. I didn't attend, no one was surprised. It was sometime after dark that Elena called me, asking me to come pick them up. The party had been cut short by an animal attack. Something had bitten Vicki Donovan and an ambulance and the police had been called. I drove over and found a group of more or less wasted teenagers waiting for me.

"Alright, Elena, Jeremy, in the car please", I ushered them towards where I had parked and then turned to Bonnie and Caroline, "Do you two have a ride home?"

Bonnie shook her head, "We were planning on walking."

"Yeah… Not a good idea if there's some sort of beast loose", I commented, "I'll take you."

She glanced at Caroline, who looked worse for the wear, "Could you drop us at the café? If she goes home in this condition, her mom will freak."

I sighed, "Fine, I'll drive Elena and Jer home first and then go with you to get sobered up at the café", I decided, "I don't particularly want to be present witnessing Jenna chew out Jeremy anyway. He looked pretty out of it."

Less than half an hour later I was at the café with two of them. There were large glasses of water in front of them both and I was tapping the plastic table top with a purple painted fingernail.

"Why didn't he go for me? You know, how come the guys that I want never want me?" Caroline asked pitifully.

I frowned at Bonnie, silently asking for clarification.

"Stefan shot her down pretty harshly", she explained.

"Ah." Now it made sense. "Stefan… The guy you all are drooling over?"

"I'm inappropriate. I always say the wrong thing. And… Elena always says the right thing. She doesn't even try! And he just picks her. And she's always the one that everyone picks, for everything. And I try so hard, and… I'm never the one", Caroline continued, skillfully ignoring both Bonnie and I.

"Oh stop with the pity party", I scoffed at her, "So Stefan's more into brunettes than blondes, find someone else to chase after. It's not the end of the world if one guy turns you down. Jeesh…"

"But it's always Elena!" She argued.

"She dated Matt the past forever", I pointed out, "Everyone knew it and not one guy turned you down in favor of her the whole time she was off the market. Now Stefan chooses her instead of you and you're all bent out of shape. Get a grip, girl!"

"It's easy for you to say!" She whined, "You're not interested in guys!"

"Not interested?" A familiar voice said from the table right behind me and Bonnie and all three of us whirled to look at him. I saw Damon sitting there, watching me with an almost sadistic look in his eyes and I knew he meant trouble. I groaned under my breath. "That's news to me."

"Damon – ", I began but then realized I had no idea what to say.

"Hi, Joanna", he said, downright chipper. I wanted to punch him. "I ran into you much sooner than I had expected."

"Jo?" Bonnie asked, eyes glued to the work of art that was the man before us, "You know this guy?"

I cleared my throat uncomfortably, "Yeah… Bonnie, Caroline, meet Damon Salvatore. Damon, meet Bonnie Bennett and Caroline Forbes."

Caroline was totally undressing the vampire with her eyes. I couldn't blame her. "How did you two meet?" She asked.

I hurriedly answered, before Damon had the chance, knowing I wouldn't like what he would have to say, "We ran into each other last weekend and got talking. He's here to visit family."

Damon hummed in agreement and then with a wicked glint in his eyes asked: "Now what's this I hear about not being interested in men?"

"Joanna's asexual", Caroline cheerfully answered. "She's never been into guys. Or girls. Or anyone really."

"Really?" Damon repeated, voice thick with incredulity. "That's… Bizarre."

I noticed both Bonnie and Caroline looking at me suspiciously and groaned again. Then I looked at him in defeat, "Are you going to keep hinting until I spill?"

He had the gall to smirk at me, "Are you ashamed of me, darling?"

I huffed and turned back around in my seat, facing Caroline and as soon as Bonnie too had righted herself, I said: "I slept with him. It was good."

"Good?" His voice interrupted, offended, "I'm never merely good. I'm always amazing, thank you very much."

I rolled my eyes, "Fine, it was amazing", I imitated his tone to the best of my ability. "Not the first guy I've swapped bodily fluids with, and won't be the last." Both girls looked at me shocked, like they were seeing another person entirely. "I've told you – several times might I add – that I'm not asexual, but you didn't believe me. I just don't kiss and tell."

"You… and he…" Caroline stumbled over her words and then finally gathered herself and almost shrieked: "What's with you Gilbert girls snatching yourselves hot Salvatores!?"

I made a face, only now making the connection that I had indeed slept with the brother of my sister's boyfriend. A disturbing thought. I felt the need to defend myself, "For the record, I slept with Damon before any of us even met Stefan. So this is just a… very disturbing coincidence."

"Or you and Elena just have a similar taste in men", Bonnie giggled.

"Ugh", I frowned at her in distaste, "I wouldn't go for Stefan even if you paid me, so no, our tastes aren't all that much alike."

"Why go for my brother when you can have me?" Damon suddenly said, and I realized he had walked over and was standing right behind me. I felt him put his hand on my shoulder and begin to slowly caress the shoulder and the back of my neck. My long chocolate brown hair was conveniently up in a bun, letting his hand travel over my skin unobstructed. "The all-around superior brother?"

"Are you propositioning her?" Bonnie asked smirking.

"I don't know", he hummed thoughtfully, "Am I?"

I pushed his hand away gently and said: "He's not. It's late and I have school tomorrow."

Judging by the giggle Caroline let out, the expression on Damon must have been worth seeing. I imagine he was pouting, but I wasn't in a hurry to check. Instead, I asked Caroline: "Feeling more sober?" She'd done good work of the water and was looking more aware. She nodded. "Great, then we should be going." I rose from my seat and found myself almost nose to nose with Damon.

"So tonight's a no-go, but what about tomorrow?" He asked.

I shrugged, "Can't say."

He wiggled his fingers at me, palm up, and said: "Phone."

I huffed, but did as told and handed it to him. He was quick to give me his and I obligingly typed down my phone number. As we exchanged the phones again, I found he'd saved his number under his own name – full name – which I had to appreciate. I liked to have all my contacts saved in a uniform manner, I was anal like that.

"Until tomorrow then", he said with an irritatingly self-satisfied grin, placed a quick kiss on the corner of my mouth and strolled out of the café with quick nods to Bonnie and Caroline... Who didn't hesitate to start bombarding me with questions. I decided silence was my best defense as I dropped them off before driving back home.

So... I would like to know how you liked this so far. More to come later this week or the next. Thanks for reading.

Posted on April 22nd, 2015.