Word of warning: There's going to be shipping in this chapter. And several other chapters to come.

Why?

Because it's a Teen Titans fanfic.

A Teen Titans fanfic without shipping is like a night without stars.

…

"And…Go!"

Static shot a static bolt at Robin, but the Titans' leader leapt into the air and threw a pair of birdarangs at the Dakota teen. Static zapped the weapons out of the air and hurled them back at the boy wonder, who expertly caught them, his gloves ensuring that the electric current running through them wouldn't affect him. Robin tossed a smoke bomb onto the ground, and a furious white fog erupted across the mat. Static zapped the gas and pushed it away in a bubble of electricity…..

Just in time to see Robin lunge at him with his bo-staff. He caught the incoming blow with his hands, then started to pump everything he had into the staff, knowing that he had to really pour on the voltage to get through Robin's gloves. The tactic eventually worked, as Robin was stunned long enough for Static to boot him in the gut and knock him back, but Robin landed on the ground hands first and flipped back onto his feet. He smirked. "Not bad." he complemented.

"Likewise." Static said as he smirked back. He had used up a lot of power to zap Robin just then, but he wasn't about to let him know that.

The Titans had decided to spend their Saturday morning doing some light combat training, Static being the first to volunteer when Robin asked for an opponent. They had been going one-on-one with one another on a large gymnastics mat for a couple of minutes now, with the other four Titans looking on. Well, three of them anyway. Raven was off in the corner, meditating, as she often did in between sparring matches.

Static tossed the bo-staff back to Robin before putting up his fists again, static electricity crackling from them. Robin smirked and charged forward, using his bo-staff as a pole-vault. Seeing an opportunity, Static zapped the staff as it hit the mat…..

But not fast enough as Robin let go of the staff just as it was zapped and flew through the air. Landing right in front of the Dakota teen, Robin unleashed his fury. Open-palm strike to the nose, double-handed slap to the ears, capped off by a kick to the solar plexus that sent Static flying through the air. Static groaned in pain as he lied on the ground. Robin planted his boot on the electric hero's chest and pointed his bo-staff at his nose.

"Aaaaand point to Robin." Cyborg said. "Don't feel too bad, Static. Robin whoops pretty much everybody's butts."

"I can see that." Static commented once he got some wind back in his lungs. Robin took his boot off of Static and helped him up.

"You're good, but I can already see a problem with your techniques." Robin said. "You're mostly a ranged fighter, Static. You're at your best when there's a decent amount of distance between you and your enemy. It's when enemies get in close that they have you at a disadvantage. You need to work on your hand-to-hand combat skills."

"Hand-to-hand?" Static asked. "Isn't that your thing?"

"It is. Your point?" Robin asked.

"Well, zapping stuff is my thing." Static said as he snapped his fingers, sparks flying out as he did so. "So I'm not a tenth-degree black belt. But as long as I keep bad guys from getting too close, which isn't exactly hard with my powers, I'm good."

"It's not that simple." Robin replied. "I've done my research on you Static, and I know what your kryptonite is. All it takes is some water to short out your powers, and whenever that happens you're basically helpless. You're making the classic superhero mistake of relying on your powers too much."

"Hey, I've been able to get out of scrapes like that before." Static countered.

"And you were lucky to get out of those messes, but luck isn't something you want to rely on too heavily in a fight." Robin said.

"Come on man, get off my back." Static groaned. "What about Starfire and Raven? They're ranged fighters too, but I don't see you training them in the arts of Crouching Tiger and Hidden Dragon."

"Starfire can lift objects eight hundred times her own weight and can withstand point-blank grenades blasts, so I don't really need to worry about her holding her own in melee range." Robin said. "As for Raven, she was raised by the Monks of Azarath, who actually taught her a thing or two about hand-to-hand combat."

"Hold up." Static said. "You're telling me Raven is a sorceress and she knows kung-fu?"

"It's called manus-pansa." Raven said from her corner. She was still floating in place, her back to the other Titans, still looking like she was meditating. But evidently, it seemed as though she had been listening in on the discussion. "It's the Azarathian art of self-defense. I don't use it much, as I don't often need to. But when I do need it, it serves me well enough."

"That's putting it lightly. Raven's the second-best hand-to-hand combatant on the team!" Beast Boy enthusiastically added. "Heck, she's even kicked Robin's butt a few times during these combat drills."

"Really?" Static asked with a raised eyebrow. "Okay, this I gotta see for myself." He turned to Raven. "Yo Raven! Why don't you get on the mat and show me whatcha got!"

"I'm fine, thanks." the sorceress replied.

"Come on, girl." Static insisted. "I thought you were a Raven, not a Chicken!"

Beast Boy doubled over laughing. "Good one!" he hollered at Static while giving him a thumbs up.

"Yes! It is amusing because both ravens and chickens are each a kind of bird!" Starfire added. She turned to Cyborg with an expectant look on her face. He nodded at her, confirming that that was indeed the joke. Starfire giggled again, both from the joke and from the excited satisfaction that she was getting the hang of Earth humor.

Apparently, the teasing from her friends was enough to spur Raven from her meditation and she stood up. "Robin. I volunteer to face Static next." she evenly said.

"He's all yours." Robin replied with a smirk. He patted Static's shoulder as he walked off the mat. "It was nice knowing ya, buddy." he quietly commented as he joined the other Titans to spectate. Raven floated over to the side of the mat opposite Static's and settled on the floor. A hand emerged from her cloak to loosen the button around her neck keeping it on, removing the cloak and gently setting down to the side.

It was at that point that Static realized that he had never really seen Raven without her cloak on before. She wore her signature cloak everywhere she went, 24/7, and it did a pretty good job of covering up pretty much everything below the neck. Occasionally, he would catch a glimpse of what was underneath, usually in a fight, but it was always shrouded in the cloak's own shadow. He knew what her arms and hands looked like from seeing her fight and from holding a book she was reading, but that was about it. He never even got a really good look at her face, which was always at least partially obscured by her cloak's hood.

Now there she was, with no cloak or hood obscuring her at all. He could see everything now. Her grey skin, her hourglass figure, her wide hips and legs that seemed to go on for days. Her face was pretty too, round and soft and with short purple hair that framed it well. Faced with this reveal, Static's hormone-fueled teenaged brain couldn't help but make the following observation.

Raven was fine.

It was at that point that Static was unceremoniously sprayed with cold water. "What the hell?!" he demanded as he looked over at Beast Boy holding a super-soaker.

"Sorry bro, Robin's orders." Beast Boy apologized in a tone that was in no way a real apology.

"This match will have a stipulation - no using your powers." Robin replied. Sure enough, Static looked down on his hand and saw the futile sparks dancing across his fingers. He tried to whip up a charge, but got zilch. "Raven, that goes for you too, just to keep things fair."

"Don't even think about it, Beast Boy." Raven commented as she fixed a glare on the green hero. He set down the super soaker and put his hands up, wisely heeding her implied threat.

"And…..Go!" Cyborg shouted.

Static charged in first, while Raven was still standing where she stood, his hope being to catch her off-guard with a first strike. He cocked back his fist and threw the first punch…..

Which Raven swatted to the side with an open palm, as though his fist was little more than an errant fly. The deflection created a window for Raven to exploit as she stuck his vulnerable chest with an open hand strike, followed up by an upward kick that barely whiffed past his chin, Static jerking his head back on reflex just in time.

Static tried another wild punch, but the punch was once again easily deflected by Raven's hands. This kept up for a few seconds up until she dealt an open-palm strike right to his nose, followed by another right to his forehead. Seeing stars, Static was all but helpless as Raven then leapt into the air and delivered a kick right to his chest, knocking him down onto his back. As his world slowly came back into focus, he saw Raven smirking as she looked down on him, Beast Boy's howling laughter easily audible from the sidelines.

"I believe that's game." Cyborg wryly commented.

"Take five, Static." Robin said as he helped the Dakota teen back up. As Static walked back over to the bench to towel off and chug some water, he watched Raven do the same. Once she was done wiping her forehead, she grabbed her cloak, put it back on, then went back to meditating like nothing even happened.

….Damn. Static thought to himself.

…

Once hand-to-hand drills were done, the group moved on to more individualized workouts, something that Static was openly grateful for. "Finally. Something I can actually do. Without getting knocked flat on my butt." he said as he and Cyborg walked over to the weight area.

"You lift?" Cyborg asked, a little surprised.

"A little bit." Static replied with a shrug. He flexed his arms. "How do you think I got these puppies?" He then grabbed a couple of twenty-lb dumbbells and started lifting.

"Puppies is right. They're just adorable." Cyborg teased. He positioned himself under the massive, twenty-ton weight load bigger than he is and started lifting himself.

"Hey, not all of us can benchpress a semi, big man." Static countered.

"You mean like how not all of us can be tenth-degree black belts?" Beast Boy teased as he strode over to join the two. "Don't mind me. Just thought I'd pump a little iron myself." the green hero said as he grabbed a pair of twenty-pound dumbbells himself and started lifting. Static just arced an eyebrow at the green hero. "What? You got knocked the hell out back there! Not like I'm wrong."

"Rob's got a point, you know. You can't zap 'em all." Cyborg said, steering the conversation back on topic.

"I know. That's why I started workin' out a couple years back, because I knew how physical superhero work gets. Guess that's not enough though." Static replied.

"Ah, don't sweat it, man." Cyborg said. "I'll bet Rob or Rae would be willing to teach you a thing or two on how to throw a punch."

"Yeah, I'll bet Raven will be more than happy to school you again, dude." Beast Boy added with a snicker.

"Yeah. Raven." Static said as he looked over to where Raven was. She was still meditating on the far side of the gym area, this time while floating, several objects such as weights and medicine balls floating around her, orbiting her like she was a celestial body.

"Yo Static. Mind upping the ante over here?" Cyborg asked. "I'm done with my warm-ups."

"Sure thing." Static said as he walked over to the weight machine and punched in a slightly heavier weight. Cyborg continued to lift, his legs bending and stretching as he pumped the massive weight above him, this time with more effort but with a wider grin.

"So Cy. The T-Car all nice and clean yet?" Beast Boy asked with a knowing smirk. Cyborg sent a fierce scowl at the changeling.

"I'm gonna get you back for that one. Just you wait." Cyborg hissed.

"You haven't tried anything worse than a robo-noogie yet." Beast Boy pointed out.

"Oh it's comin'." Cyborg said. "You can't rush these things, BB. Revenge is a dish best served cold." Truth be told, the only reason Cyborg hadn't pranked Beast Boy back yet was because he couldn't come up with an appropriate retaliatory prank. A simple whoopee-cushion or bucket of water wasn't going to cut it. No. For what the little grass-stain did to his Baby, his vengeance had to be legendary. Something the changeling would never forget. Something that he would be describing to a therapist ten years after the fact. Something not only embarrassing, but emotionally scarring. He had yet come up with such a vengeance, unfortunately, so for now he was simply waiting for inspiration to strike.

Feeling confidant that he got his weights in, Cyborg stepped out from under the machine, and carefully set down the weight. Even placed as gently as possible, it still created a bang loud enough to echo throughout the cavernous garage area of the Tower. As Cyborg toweled off and grabbed a water bottle, he saw that Static was still pumping the same twenty-lb dumbbells, seemingly staring off into space. Odd. Shouldn't he have moved on to something heavier by now? Cyborg followed the young man's gaze and found that he was looking at Raven.

"Dude. What are you staring at Raven for?" Beast Boy asked, also noticing the Dakota teen's line of sight.

"Huh?" Static asked as he was snapped back from reality.

"You were staring at Raven." Beast Boy pointed out.

Static suddenly looked shocked, his eyes darting around. "Uh….no I wasn't."

"Dude. I saw." Beast Boy said. "You were lookin' right at her."

"Yeah, I saw that too." Cyborg added.

"She got a mustard stain on her cloak or somethin'?" Beast Boy asked as he stared at the sorceress.

"No, she's perfect." Static quickly said. BB turned to Static with a curious look. "I mean the cloak! The cloak is perfect!"

A wide grin spread across Beast Boy's face. "Dude…were you checking her out?"

"I….I uh…" Static said, a flush of embarrassment spreading across his cheeks. "….Kind of?"

Beast Boy paused, oddly silent. "….Pfft-AHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAA!" he burst out laughing, gripping his gut as he fell onto the floor butt-first. "You….You were checking - AHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT IS TOO GOOD!" he collapsed onto his back and started kicking his feet into the air and slamming his fist on the floor. Static grimaced, clearly not appreciating the mockery.

"Okay…..okay….." Beast Boy gasped as he tried to collect himself. "I'm done." he said as he stood back up. Static opened his mouth to say something….

Beast Boy then morphed into a hyena and laughed and cackled, rolling on the floor with his paws in the air. Static growled at the changeling, his body giving off sparks of electricity as his temper flared.

…..And that was when it happened. Inspiration finally struck Cyborg.

It was an idea. An awful idea. Hands-down, it was the single most evil idea that had ever crawled its way into Cyborg's brain. A part of him knew that it was probably overkill - it was simply too cruel to actually follow through on. But damn it all, BB dumped paint on his Baby. Nobody messes with his Baby. The time for mercy had long since passed.

"….You know Static…Raven's single." Cyborg commented.

"Say what?" Static asked, completely forgetting about his anger.

"Say what?" Beast Boy asked as he morphed back into a human, completely forgetting about his laughter.

"Yeah. So if you really like her so much, you should ask her out." Cyborg said with a thumbs-up.

"Woah woah woah WOAH. Time out. Slow down. That is a bad idea." Beast Boy said as he stood back up. He wrapped an arm around Static's shoulder. "Listen Static. Raven isn't what you'd call 'the dating type.' You're my friend, which is why I'd hate it if something happened to you."

"Something happened?" Static asked.

"I'll be blunt. If you try to ask out Raven, she'll probably banish you to another dimension." Beast Boy elaborated. "She's cranky like that."

"Ah, don't let him scare ya." Cyborg said as he put his own arm around Static's shoulders from the side opposite Beast Boy. "Raven may take a while to warm up to people, but once she does, she's a real sweetheart."

"Many words come to mind when I think of Raven, but 'sweetheart' is definitely NOT one of them." Beast Boy argued.

"Besides, maybe she just needs a handsome young gentleman to come along and woo her." Cyborg went on. "I mean have you looked in the mirror lately, Static? You're a very pretty man."

"Very true." Static replied with a smirk.

"Dude, it takes a lot more than just pretty to 'woo' Raven." Beast Boy countered. He snapped his fingers. "Oh! And how could I forget! To get to Raven, you gotta go through Robin first."

"Robin?" Static asked as he looked over to the boy wonder, who was viciously attacking a large punching bag a few mats away. Starfire was holding the bag steady for him as he assaulted it with his fists and boots.

"Yeah. See Robin and Raven? They're like this." Beast Boy said as he crossed his fingers. "Like brother and sister, and all the protective instincts that entail. So….you'd basically be asking out the team leader's little sister."

"Oooooh." Static said as he realized the implications of that.

"Oh relax, will ya?" Cyborg said. "You already know Robin likes and trusts you enough. I'm willing to bet he's got no problem with you asking out Raven."

"Er…" Static was evidently unsure of the prospect of asking permission to date Raven from the team leader.

"Come on, don't be such a chicken. Worst that can happen is he says no." Cyborg said.

"Either that or he gives you plastic surgery with his boots." Beast Boy added.

"Go on, Romeo. Destiny waits for no man!" With that, he harshly shoved Static in the general direction of Robin. The Dakota teen looked over his shoulder and saw Cyborg giving him the thumbs-up and Beast Boy giving him an evil grin. He took a breath and approached the team leader. Cyborg zoomed in with his robotic eye and turned up his audio receptors to see and hear the situation better.

"Yo Robin. Can I talk to you for a sec?" Static asked.

"What is it?" Robin replied as he stopped his assault on that poor beaten up bag. Starfire also gave Static her undivided attention, similarly curious.

"Well…" Static began, a little bit nervous. "I've noticed recently that Raven is kind of…..easy on the eyes, let's say. And…..Cyborg told me that she isn't seeing anyone….so I'm thinking of asking her out. Except Beast Boy told me how tight you and Raven were, so I figured I oughta check and make sure it would be cool with you before trying anything."

Starfire gasped as her eyes lit up. "You wish to court Raven?" she asked excitedly.

"Well….if Robin's okay with it, then yeah." Static replied. Starfire squealed as she wrapped Static in a tight hug.

"Oh, most joyous of days!" Starfire declared. "Robin! Won't you please give Static your blessing so that he may begin the courtship?" Robin simply stroked his chin in thought. He then shrugged.

"I suppose so." Robin said.

"Woah. Really?" Static asked.

"Glorious!" Starfire as she hugged Static tighter.

"Star….ribs…..my ribs….." Static wheezed.

"Oh. My apologies." Starfire said as she let go, allowing the electric hero to catch his breath.

"A couple of things though." Robin said. "First of all, I wouldn't expect a yes when you ask her out. Raven's not exactly the dating type."

"But what if I do get a yes?" Static asked in a hopeful tone.

"That brings me to my second point. If you two do end up dating, you treat her with respect." Robin sternly told him. "If I know Raven, she'll probably prefer to take things slow. You respect that. Don't rush her or push her into anything she doesn't want to do. Otherwise, you'll have to answer to me. Got that?"

"Don't worry, Rob. I'll be a perfect gentleman." Static said with a thumbs up.

"I wish you the best of luck in winning Raven's heart!" Starfire said.

Static nodded his thanks to both Starfire and Robin as he walked back to rejoin Cyborg and Beast Boy. "I've got the green light from Robin." Static said with two thumbs up.

"I knew you would!" Cyborg said with a triumphant chuckle.

"You're lucky Starfire was there to help convince Robin. He can never say no to her." Beast Boy said. He then put on a devilish grin. "All you gotta do now is ask out the queen of mean herself. Don't worry, I'll be sure to arrange your funeral."

"Yeah, yeah." Static said, brushing off Beast Boy's comments. He turned to where Raven was…..

Only to find she was gone.

"Where'd she go?" Static asked.

"She must be done meditating. Probably teleported back to her room when no one was looking. She does that sometimes." Cyborg said.

Static lifted up his arm and smelled his armpit, then wrinkled his nose. "Just as well. I kinda stink from all the sweat. If I'm gonna ask Raven out, I'm gonna need to make myself more presentable." With that, Static began making his way out of the gym area and presumably to the nearest bathroom to shower.

"Dead man walking…" Beast Boy commented as he watched Static walk away.

"You seem awfully confidant that Raven won't go out with him." Cyborg commented as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Come on. This is Raven we're talking about." Beast Boy said. "You and I both know that she'd never go for a guy like Static."

"Wouldn't she?"

"Uh, yeah, she wouldn't."

"…..Wanna bet?"

"…..How much?"

"Fifty bucks."

Beast Boy whistled. "You must be in quite the generous mood to be making such a large donation to my wallet, Cy." he said before shaking Cyborg's hand. "You're on."

…..

Static made his way to the bathroom and, after tossing his dirty uniform in the laundry bin, hopped into the shower and started washing himself with enthusiasm. A part of his brain still couldn't quite believe it. A girl. He was going to ask out a girl. He was going to ask out a girl for the first time in, like, a year. As he scrubbed himself and thought about his upcoming 'courtship' as Starfire had called it, he couldn't help but think about how woefully inexperienced he was in the realm of romance. Throughout his adolescence, he only ever had two big crushes. Frieda Goren and Daisy Watkins.

Frieda had been a good friend of his since middle school, and Virgil had had a crush on her up until a couple years ago. He never really acted on his feelings for Frieda, so they never became anything more than just friends. Then along came Daisy. He met her during his brief stint at the Ben Moore Charter School for Science a couple years back. Unlike Frieda, Virgil was actually able to go on a few dates with Daisy. Well, if you could call studying for tests together 'dates.' They were study dates, which totally counted as dates, regardless of what Sharon said.

But once again, Virgil and Daisy never really became more than friends. It wasn't because he wasn't willing to act on his feelings - he totally was. His missed opportunity with Frieda had taught him that you had to go for it while you could. This time however, it was his superhero duties that were to blame. He would end up disappearing on Daisy at the most inopportune times, even in the middle of their study dates, to the point where it became obvious that Daisy kind of resented him for it. At some point, they both came to an unspoken agreement to simply remain friends. He honestly did hate leaving her hanging all the time, but he couldn't very well ignore a break-in or apartment fire for the sake of a date.

With his career in vigilantism rendering any and all romantic prospects futile, he had all but thrown in the towel on such things. He's never even gotten to kiss a girl, a thought which filled him with no small amount of self-pity. He was seventeen, for crying out loud. He really should've gotten to kiss a girl by now. And no, not just those grateful pecks on the cheek female citizens would give him after he saved them, but straight up frenching it with a hottie for ten good minutes in a closet! Hell, for that matter, he should've hit second base by now!

He turned down the heat of the shower's water by a significant amount, realizing that his sexual frustration was starting to get the better of him.

Anyway, the point was that Static wasn't very romantically experienced, mostly because his superhero work made dating too difficult. That said though, he had a good feeling about Raven. A really good feeling. He knew that the problems that got between him and Daisy wouldn't get between him and Raven, because she was a superhero just like he was. If an emergency popped up in the middle of their date, he wouldn't be bailing on her, because she would probably be going with him to lend a hand. He loved that idea - of a relationship not getting ruined by his superhero work. Hell, if anything, his superhero work might help his romantic life for once.

Course, all of that would be a moot point if he couldn't get Raven to agree to a date. Hence the shower, followed by the shaving. And the tooth brushing. And mouthwash. And deodorant. Followed after by more mouthwash. He didn't doubt that Beast Boy had a point - Raven definitely came across as a hard girl to impress. If this was going to happen, he'd have to really bring his A-game.

In fact, now that he thought about it, he wouldn't just need his A-game. He needed help. He needed someone with inside information on what Raven wanted in a dude. He knew that there was only one person in the Tower who could answer those questions.

"Yo, Starfire!" Static hollered as he knocked on the Tamaranean's door, ten minutes after he'd washed up and changed into a clean uniform. The door opened, revealing -

*THWOP*

"AAAAAAHHHH!" Static shouted as Silkie flew through the air and landed on his face. Starfire floated through the doorway and pulled Silkie off of the poor young man's face.

"Silkie appears to like you." the Tamaranean beamed at Static.

"Yeah. I noticed." Static replied.

"So how goes your courtship with Raven?" she asked.

"That's actually what I'm here about." Static said. "You're Raven's best friend, right?" Starfire nodded. "Well, maybe you could tell me how to impress her?"

Starfire gasped in delight. Static was beginning to notice that she does that a lot. "I have a better idea! I shall show you!" Starfire said as she tossed Silkie back onto her bed before grabbing Static by the arm and dragging him down the corridor.

"Where we goin'?" Static asked.

"To the Mall of Shopping!" Starfire triumphantly answered.

…

The Centerfield Mall was like any other mall you could imagine in America. Large, dozens of different stores, and naturally, crawling with teenagers. Starfire was pretty convinced that the secret to wooing a certain gloomy sorceress was somewhere in here.

"Barnes and Nobles?" Static asked as he and Starfire stood outside the eponymous bookstore.

"Oh yes. Raven adores books!" Starfire replied.

"I noticed." Static commented. Frankly he was glad that a visit to Hot Topic wasn't on the itinerary.

"Come, friend-Static! We must turn you into a poet!" Starfire declared as she dragged Static inside.

"Okay, okay, you don't need to drag me everywhere!" Static protested.

Deeper into the book shop was the poetry section. The Tamaranean provided Static with several different books on the subject. "Raven loves poetry! Mastering the spoken word will be vital in winning her heart!"

"I dunno…" Static said as he skimmed through the books. "It's not really my thing. I mean, I don't wanna be somethin' I'm not. I wanna be real with Raven, you know?"

"True, but I have read that shared interests are an important part of Earth courtship." Starfire explained as she floated around Static, beaming a smile at him. "In the field of romance, poetry is a skill well worth mastering! It shall create a window for Raven to look into your heart! You will see!"

"Whatever you say, Fairy Godmother." Static quipped as he continued skimming through the books. A bunch of names that didn't ring any bells, a few poems whose themes flew right over his head, Static was suddenly wishing he had paid more attention in english class. He suddenly stopped on one of the dozens of poetry books that Starfire randomly handed to him, one whose title immediately leapt out at thim.

The Dead Emcee Scrolls: The Lost Teachings of Hip-Hop and Connected Writing

"…..Huh." Static said as he opened the book and started skimming the book's contents. "Hm."

"Oh?" Starfire asked.

"I think I found some poetry that actually is my thing." Static said with a smile.

It was then that the two heard an alarm go off elsewhere in the mall. Static groaned. "Bad guys around here have the worst timing." he grumbled as he reached into his pocket for his saucer. As the two heroes darted out the door, Static slammed the book on the counter along with some money. "I'll be back for the receipt!" Static told the cashier as he stuffed the book into his inner coat pocket and followed Starfire out of the bookstore and towards the source of the alarm.

They arrived at the alarm's source - an electronics store with a broken window. Someone was standing outside, wearing a trench coat and trilby, but those garments couldn't hide the scaly skin, slit-eyes and the large, muscular tail. Definitely a Bang Baby, and an ugly one at that. The lizard man was shocked by the arrival of the teens. "How'd you two get here so quick?" he demanded in a vaguely asian accent.

"Fun fact: Superheroes like to shop too." Static answered.

"Cease and desist your crime-committing!" Starfire ordered, her eyes and hands glowing green.

The lizard smiled. "Darkwing! Serpentine! Now!" he shouted.

Two more meta-humans appeared. The first looked like he was half-man, half-bat. A 'manbat,' if you will. The bat creature shrieked as he swooped down from the rafters and tackled Starfire to the ground. The second one leapt from a nearby indoor tree and tackled Static to the ground as well. As he hit the ground, he saw a large, snake-like scaly body wrapping around and squeezing him. Attached to the body was the upper half of a young woman with similarly scaly skin. She grinned at him hungrily.

Meanwhile, the lizard man looked through the hole in the window. "Titans here already!" he shouted.

"Really?!" an excited female voice asked before another meta human leapt through the window. This young woman was the freakiest-looking one yet, covered in brown fuzz and four, spider-like appendages protruding from her back. Even freakier than that, she had four eyes - another pair right above the other one, all four eyes being black with no discernible irises. She quickly went from excited to angry as she turned towards the lizard. "What the hell! There's only two of them are here!"

"So let's wrap up before the others show up!" the lizard ordered. "Greyhound!"

"Yeah Komodo?" a lanky, werewolf-looking Bang Baby covered in grey hair asked as he stepped out of the store.

"Keep a nose out for the other Titans!" Komodo ordered. "Tarantella and me are gonna clean out more stores while Serpentine and Darkwing keep the super zeroes busy. Soon as the other Titans show up, you let me know."

"You got it." Greyhound replied as he quickly ran off to take on the role of lookout.

"Come on, Komodo! We can SO take on the Titans!" the spider woman, Tarantella, insisted.

"Yeah, I'll bet that's what Judgement thought." Komodo replied.

"Can't we at least wait until Beast Boy gets here?" Tarantella pleaded. Komodo growled at her. "What? He's cute."

"Move it!" Komodo snarled at the tarantula before running down the corridor into another store. Tarantella hissed at the lizard indignantly before breaking into another store herself.

Static pumped a few hundred volts through his system, shocking Serpentine and forcing the snake woman to slither off of him. She quickly recovered and spat some green goop out of her mouth at him. Static rolled out of the way and onto his feet, smirking at the Bang Baby. "Didn't your mother ever tell you that ladies shouldn't spit?"

Static noticed that the green goop she spat was sizzling and dissolving the floor where it landed. "Especially if it's acidic." Static added.

Serpentine paid him no mind as she continued hocking acidic loogies at the electrical hero, which she could fire with surprising distance, accuracy, and rapidness, forcing him to stay on the move. He zapped some nearby objects and tossed them at her, but she nimbly dodged out of the way as she kept up her barrage. Meanwhile, Starfire had quickly tossed Darkwing off, but the bat took to the air and circled around and lunged at her with his talons. Starfire grabbed them by the ankles and tossed him into a hair salon. He recovered and flew out, inhaled, then screeched.

It was a super-sonic screech that sent ripples through the air and pain into Starfire's ears, forcing her to cover her ears as she yelled in pain. Static saw it and realized that it worked the same as Talon's screech - a focused, hyper-sonic sound wave. It wouldn't be as effective if you weren't in its way, but unfortunately Starfire was. She was stunned by the sonic blast, allowing Darkwing to grab her by the shoulders with his talons and toss her into a PopTV stand, completely destroying it. This left Static to deal with the two meta-humans alone.

Darkwing lunged at the Dakota teen, but Static zapped him right in the chest and knocked him back. He wheeled on Serpentine, his fists crackling with electromagnetic energy. Serpentine reared up on her lower half, raising herself high into the air and making it look like she was twelve feet tall. She rained down more acid loogies on Static, forcing him again to move. He bolted over to the wreckage of the PopTV stand, just as Starfire was starting to come to and climb out of it. Darkwing had recovered himself, and flew over, landing next to Serpentine.

"Don't suppose you got any ideas?" Static asked.

"WHAT?!" Starfire shouted, putting a hand to her ear.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS!" Static shouted back.

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS?!"

"Guess that's a no."

"WHAT?!"

"NEVER MIND! I'LL FOCUS ON DARKWING! YOU TAKE ON SERPENTINE!"

"BUT DUCKLINGS DO NOT STEP IN TIME!"

"AND BREAK!" With that, Static hopped on his saucer and zoomed towards Darkwing, firing a static bolt at the creature and hitting it right in the chest. Correctly assuming that that left Serpentine to her, Starfire flew towards the snake woman to deliver a ferocious punch right to her gut. Serpentine was knocked onto her butt, then quickly slithered away to regain some distance. She reared back up to hock acid loogies at the Tamaranean. Starfire nimbly dodged the loogies and hurled some star bolts in return, putting Serpentine on the run.

Meanwhile, Darkwing was screaming his hyper-sonic screech at Static, but the Dakota teen was able to weave around the focused sound beam. It was something he got plenty of practice doing from fighting Talon. He zapped Darkwing again, knocking him to the ground in a smoking heap. Shaking off the shock, Darkwing reached into his pocket and pulled out a walkie talkie.

"These guys are beatin' us good! We need help over here, jefe!" Darkwing shouted into the walkie-talkie before screeching at Static to get him to back off.

On the other side of the mall, Komodo growled from this update. "Tarantella. Let's go." he ordered. The tarantula meta human crawled up a wall and onto the ceiling, crawling towards the fight. Komodo ran towards the fight as well, finding Static and Darkwing squaring off. He grabbed a nearby hot dog stand, lifted it with his saurian strength, and hurled it at Static. Static saw it coming and ducked out of the way.

Komodo then grabbed one of the indoor trees and pulled it upwards, uprooting it, and then swinging it at the Dakota teen like a club. "Whoa! Lizard man's been workin' out!" he quipped.

"Tarantella! Now!" Komodo barked.

The tarantula leapt from the ceiling where she lied in wait and tackled Static to the ground, sinking her fangs into his neck. Suddenly, Static's whole body below the neck went numb and difficult to move. As he tried desperately to will his suddenly-limp muscles to move, Tarantella began wrapping his body in silk, using the web glands located on the four spidery appendages sprouting from her back. By the time she was done, Static was thoroughly cocooned from the neck down.

"Thanks for the assist." Darkwing said. "Come on, let's go help Serpentine." On that note, Darkwing took to the air to lend the snake girl aid, followed quickly by Tarantella and Komodo, the former once again crawling on the walls. Starfire and Serpentine weren't far away, the latter still dodging and weaving out of the way of star bolts being fired by the former. Komodo was still carrying the small tree he was using as an improvised weapon, and hurled it at the Tamaranean like it was a caber.

Starfire eeped as she saw it coming and dodged it. However, it turned out to be just a distraction. Darkwing lunged at the alien girl with his talons and raked his claws across her arms as she raised them to block, creating the perfect opening for Tarantella to leap onto her and bite her neck, sending the same paralyzing toxin into her system as well. She flopped onto the ground, prompting the tarantula to web her up. With a scoff, she dragged Starfire over to Static, and tossed the hero on top of the other.

"Nice try, Titans." Komodo said with a wide, reptilian grin. "Tell your friends that you just got beat by the Wild Pack!"

"WHAT?!" Starfire shouted. "WE LEEK MILD CRACK?! BUT WE DO NOT DO THE DRUGS!"

"…..Tarantella, web up her mouth too." Komodo ordered. As the spider rolled her eyes and did just that, Komodo's walkie-talkie starting crackling.

"Boss, it's Greyhound. T-Car's comin'!" Greyhound reported.

"You sure?" Komodo asked.

"Barbecue sauce mixed with motor oil. Definitely Cyborg's ride." Greyhound said.

"Alright. Get the van ready." Komodo ordered as he turned off the walkie-talkie. "Titans comin'! Let's grab the stuff and go!" he roared as he and Darkwing went over to grab the sacks full of money and other valuables.

"The other Titans are here?" Tarantella asked excitedly. "That means Beast Boy is too! I gotta - "

"Let's go, Juliet." Serpentine hissed as she grabbed the spider and hauled her out of the mall as she slithered after Darkwing and Komodo, Tarantella protesting the whole way.

A minute later, the rest of the Titans found Static and Starfire tied up in spider silk. "What happened?" Robin asked as he tried to undo the silk holding Starfire while Cyborg worked on Static.

"More Bang Babies, that's what happened." Static grumbled.

"WHUFT?!" Starfire shouted, her mouth still muffled by web.

…..

"Okay, you two should be fine." Cyborg said as he examined Static's and Starfire's test results back in the Titans Tower's med bay. "Tarantella's paralysis toxin should be starting to wear off now. Just keep drinking fluids, flushing it all out, and you should be back in fighting shape by tomorrow. How are Star's ears, Rae?"

"Eardrums were damaged, but nothing my healing magic couldn't handle." Raven replied. "Her deafness should fade in an hour or two."

"Didn't know you had healing magic." Static said. For the last twenty minutes or so, Raven had been holding her hands around Starfire's ears, her hands glowing white - not a color that Static would typically associate with Raven.

Raven shrugged. "I know a lot of different spells." she plainly replied.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Robin asked. Starfire blushed.

"Robin! I…..I requested no such thing!" Starfire blurted out.

"Uh….Are you okay?!" Robin said considerably louder.

"Oh." Starfire replied, suddenly embarrassed. "Yes. I am fine. I thought you said something else."

"Just keep her away from any more loud noises tonight, and she'll be fine." Cyborg said.

"Man, you two really got your butts kicked." Beast Boy commented with a snicker.

"Hey, we were doin' just fine up until that spider chick jumped us!" Static argued.

"Relax. You were outnumbered and caught by surprise. Even Titans have off days." Robin said. "Speaking of numbers…..the Wild Pack. You mentioned there were five of them."

"Yeah. Seemed like Komodo was their leader." Static replied. "He was running a pretty tight crew. They had walkie-talkies and everything."

"Komodo wasn't just causing random mayhem. He had a plan. Like Judgement did." Robin said as he stroked his chin in thought. "The Bang Babies are becoming more organized, forming their own gangs."

"Yeah, that's what they did in Dakota too." Static replied.

"But Slade said that he didn't want the Bang Babies to do that. So….why's he lettin' them do that?" Cyborg asked.

"Hard to say." Robin replied. "Best guess: All the meta-human gangs are all aligned with one another and all work for Slade, as opposed to competing with each other like in Dakota."

"Still doesn't explain why he hasn't got them doing anything big yet." Raven commented.

"One step at a time. At least now we have an idea of how their power structure works, albeit a loose one." Robin replied. He turned to Starfire and Static. "You two try to take it easy for the rest of the day. Titans dismissed."

….

Once Cyborg gave him and Star a clean bill of health, the first thing Static did was head into the bathroom to take another shower. He worked up a sweat fighting the Wild Pack, so he would need to wash it off to minimize BO. He couldn't afford any stank if he was going to be ask Raven out on a date.

Yes, he was still planning on doing that today. Part of him couldn't help but wonder if the timing was right. After all, if you're trying to impress a girl, asking her out fresh on the heels of a defeat wouldn't seem wise. He wondered if, perhaps, he should wait until the next Bang Baby attack, specifically one where he could come off as being more of a bad ass hero. He quickly decided against it, though. It had to be today. Because if not today, then when? He didn't want to be one of those chumps who wait for hypothetical golden opportunities that never come. Carpé Diém! YOLO! In the immortal words of Shia LeBouf, just do it!

Once he was sure he was so clean that Raven could see her reflection in his abs, he brushed his teeth again. And then he used mouthwash. LOTS of mouthwash. He quickly dried his hair and his whole body - couldn't look too wet when asking out Raven. It would make the fact that he showered beforehand obvious, and by proxy his intentions would be obvious.

Wait. Wouldn't Static want his intentions to be kinda obvious? Isn't that the whole point of asking someone out on a date?

True. Thing is, you don't want to look too eager. The line between eager and desperate is a thin one. You gotta be nonchalant. Don't even act like it's a thing.

On the other hand, you can't really treat it like it's not even a thing. It's actually a really big thing. You should make a girl feel special, right? A girl can't feel special if you don't treat asking her out like a thing.

Static slapped himself, silencing the debate in his head. You're way overthinking it, man. He told himself. Just dry yourself like you do after every other shower. Be cool. Above all else, be cool.

Breathing to calm himself, Static got dressed in a clean new uniform, triple-checked his reflection, then headed out of the bathroom and down the hall towards Raven's room. He knew Raven well enough to know that if you wanted to know where she was, eight times out of ten, she was in her room. All he had to walk up and knock on her door.

Yup. Just knock on her door.

…..

He's gonna do it. He's totally gonna knock on that door.

…

Come on, Static. You're seventeen, for crying out loud. You're not in middle school anymore. Static mentally chastised himself. He took a deep breath and walked away from Raven's door, stopping a few doors down. He started taking deep breaths.

"Okay. I can do this." Static said. "I'm the man. I am the man."

He started to phantom box in order to psych himself up. "I'm the man, I'm the man, girl you can tell everybody, I'm the man." He mimed a couple of jabs. "I'm the greatest, I'm a bad man, and I'm pretty! I'm so pretty, I'm so pretty, I'm so pretty!"

…..

"What's he even doing?" Beast Boy asked with a snicker.

"Looks like he's trying to psych himself up." Cyborg replied. He was sitting in the security room, where there were several screens showing the view of several cameras. Cyborg, along with Beast Boy and Starfire, were watching the corridor camera to see the moment they were all waiting for - Static asking out Raven. "He keeps quoting Muhammad Ali to himself."

"Is that similar to my invocations of the War God Kalopnark?" Starfire asked.

"Little bit." Cyborg replied.

"Oh, this is too good." Beast Boy said as he reached into a bowl of popcorn. "I get to make fifty bucks, and watch the greatest crash and burn of our generation. Best night ever." He promptly stuffed a handful into his mouth.

"You gonna share those?" Cyborg asked.

…

Okay. Here we go. Static thought to himself as he knocked on Raven's door. I'm the man. I'm the man. I'm the -

The door opened a crack, revealing half of Raven's very pretty, but also very emotionless face. "What?" she asked.

- boy. I'm a little boy who reads comic books and is scared of the doctor and likes grilled cheese sandwiches and oh my God what am I even doing right now.

"…..Sup home girl." Static said the very first thing he could think of with a wide smile. Raven's visible eyebrow raised in reply.

…..

"ShhhhooooooooooBCAHAHCHCHHCHCHCHA!" Beast Boy tried to make the noises of a crash and explosion with his mouth, before doubling over in laughter halfway through.

"Come on, Static!" Starfire said. "Sweep her off her feet!" she paused. "That is the expression, yes?"

"Yeah." Cyborg replied.

….

"….Please don't call me that." Raven evenly said.

"Right. Gotcha." Static replied. "So…I checked our patrol schedule and I noticed that you and me got an evening patrol together Monday night. And Starfire told me you liked poetry so, maybe when our patrol is over, you and I could go grab dinner together at this one poetry joint I heard about downtown?"

…

"Here it comes…" Beast Boy excitedly said.

….

"Okay." Raven replied.

"Say what?" Static asked, a little surprised.

…..

"SAY WHAT?!" Beast Boy asked, more than just a little surprised. Significantly more in fact, if the flying bowl and popcorn all over the room were any indication.

…

"We don't really know one another that well." Raven said. "And seeing as you're the newest member of the team, we should probably fix that."

"So…it's a date?" Static asked.

"If you want to call it that, sure." Raven replied. With that, the door closed. Static stood there a moment. Shocked. Pardon the pun.

"…..WOO!" Static cheered. "I'm too hot! Hot damn! Call the police and the fireman! I'm too hot! Hot damn! Make a dragon wanna retire man! I'm too hot! Hot damn! Say my name you know who I am!" He sang as he danced, shimmied and moonwalked down the hall back to his room.

…

"Booyah! That's my boy!" Cyborg cheered.

"Glorious!" Starfire cheered as well, clapping her hands in approval. "A new romance has been born!"

"I…..how….but she…and he…what just happened?!" Beast Boy demanded.

"You just lost fifty bucks. That's what happened." Cyborg replied.

"But it's Raven! Raven doesn't date! She never dates!" Beast Boy argued.

"Well, apparently she does." Cyborg replied. "Don't worry, grass stain. You don't have to pay me right now. Although I will need the money by Wednesday."

"No. No! This is wrong! This is all wrong! There's something very wrong here!" Beast Boy continued. "Look at me, Cyborg! Am I not green? Am I actually red? Check your reflection, do you suddenly have an afro?"

"What are you talkin' about?" Cyborg asked.

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT REAL LIFE IS ANYMORE!" Beast Boy shouted. He paused, wringing his hands and grinding his teeth in anxiety. "DOUBLE OR NOTHING!" he shouted.

"Pardon?" Cyborg asked.

"Hundred bucks says they don't kiss!" Beast Boy clarified.

Cyborg shook his head. "Come on, man. My boy already got a date. Cut your losses."

"He did not get a date!" Beast Boy fumed. "All he got was dinner at a poetry place!"

"Sounds like a date to me." Cyborg argued.

"It's not a date! It's totally platonic!" Beast Boy insisted. "You heard Raven. She wants to know Static better. That's it. That's all. There was no hint of her actually being into him."

"Not yet." Cyborg countered.

"We got a bet or not?!" Beast Boy demanded.

Cyborg rolled his eye. "Fine." he said as he shook Beast Boy's hand. "If you're really that eager to lose more money, I won't stop you."

"I won't!" Beast Boy barked. He then got up and stormed out of the room.

"Friend Beast Boy does not seem to approve of Static courting Raven." Starfire observed.

"Ah, don't worry about it. He just betted against Static and now he's being a sore loser." Cyborg said.

"Are you sure it is ethical to wager on someone else's romance?" Starfire asked.

"Ah, don't worry. There's no harm in it." Cyborg replied. "Just a little friendly wager."

"Very well then." Starfire said. "I shall brush up on the teen magazines so that I may coach Static on the date!" she declared before floating out of the room.

Once Cyborg was alone, he shifted the camera view to Beast Boy's room, where the little green bean was angrily pacing back and forth. Cyborg chuckled evilly at sight.

"So it begins….." Cyborg menacingly said.

...

The Wild Pack were all devised by my cohort Zgamer. Dude's come up with so many Bang Baby OC's that I'm pretty sure he's a mad scientist.