Fun Sized 01

A BtVS/Worm crossover

"He needs to be removed from play," an angelic being decided.

"He needs to be crushed like a bug," a demonic presence added.

"Or I could open a portal and make him some other reality's problem… while making him the size of an ant," Whistler quickly suggested.

"Those whom the Gods would destroy they first make mad," a muse offered, causing many to look in her direction as the moderates among the Powers rarely spoke up.

"Portal, madness, and a side order of insect size," Whistler said. "Not a problem. I'll arrange for him to be shrunk down to the size of an insect, driven mad, and tossed through a portal."

"That is satisfactory," the demonic presence stated.

"The false Slayer will need to be removed as well, and another made to account for the absence of the chaotic one," one of the more neutral Powers noted.

"If you use the avatar empowerment by Janus to remove all traces of the Slayer from her, you can simply slot the false Slayer into the chaotic one's place," the muse suggested.

"Acceptable," came the chorus.

"If that's settled I'll get to it," Whistler said, teleporting out before he could be questioned on the exact details of what he had planned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Normal slaying service has been restored," Buffy said with a smirk as the spell ended and Spike stumbled back holding the brown-haired wig that had been her hair just moments before.

Angel shrugged off the confused children and teens who has been dogpiling him when they were monsters. He smiled to see Buffy restored to herself but that smile vanished a second later.

Buffy punched Spike in the face and he blinked, "I thought you'd changed back," Spike noted with an evil grin as he grabbed her.

Xander instinctively brought up his rifle, causing Spike to use Buffy as a shield before he saw that Xander was holding a plastic toy.

"Sorry, Junior, looks like you're out of luck," the blonde vampire said cheerfully. "Well, I hate to eat and run, but – " Spike shifted into his game face and sank his fangs into Buffy's throat.

"No!" Xander yelled out in chorus with Angel and a horrified Cordelia Chase. He tried to run, even though he knew he'd be too late to save her, but found himself frozen in place as the world slowed around him, the sounds fading and air stilling until it was almost completely quiet. His eyes darted around in a panic as he stared at the frozen tableau around him, unable to move.

Whistler appeared in a flash of light and Xander unfroze. "Hey," the Balance demon began, but Xander didn't notice, his full attention locked on Buffy and Spike. He's shattered his plastic gun against the side of the vampire's head and was trying to gouge out the vampire's eyes before Whistler managed to get his attention. "I've stopped time," the demon pointed out.

"That would explain things," Xander said as he took a moment to recover while examining Spike for weaknesses. "And why?"

"As it stands, Buffy was going to die here and now," Whistler explained. "I'm a balance demon and not allowed to interfere for the most part, but I can exchange your life for hers. What do you say, she walks away a little lightheaded, I teleport Spike home, and you come with me?"

"I… I would accept that," Xander said. "Give me a second first? I want to say a few words even if they can't hear them."

"Sure, kid," Whistler said kindly.

Xander walked over to Angel. "You're scum and continue to be scum. I hope you accidentally stake yourself some night."

Whistler shook his head and tried not to laugh.

Xander returned to where Spike and Buffy were frozen together. "You could do a lot better than a walking corpse," he told her. "Take care of Willow for me… and Cordy too."

Xander walked to Cordelia. "Being surrounded by kiss-asses and sheep is no way to live. Try to be better."

"Ready?" Whistler asked.

Xander glanced around and spotted an abandoned pillow case filled with candy. "I'm good," he said as he reached in the bag for some candy.

"Good," Whistler said, tapping Spike on the forehead and making him vanish in a burst of light. He examined Buffy's savaged throat and winced. "That boy is a messy eater." The balance demon pulled a vial of glowing blue fluid out of his pocket and poured it into her wounds, the excess overflowing and running down her neck. "Once I restart time that will heal her right up."

The two vanished and everyone started moving again, Buffy trying to call out to Xander but only able to make a weak gargling sound as her throat healed.

Ignoring the confused and crying children, Cordelia joined Angel in making sure Buffy was alright. "I couldn't move but… I don't think I was frozen in time," Cordelia said, wrinkling her nose as she watched the tears in Buffy's throat close.

"Whistler like to exaggerate," Angel said as he patted Buffy on the back and helped her cough out the blood and gore that was blocking her throat.

"Xander!" she wheezed out.

"Gone," Angel told her, "I've never known Whistler to break his word, you were as good as dead until he made that deal."

"Xander's dead?" Cordelia asked softly, as if she couldn't believe it.

"A life for a life," Angel said. He may not have liked the teen and found him immature and annoying, but he admired his courage.

"How am I going to tell Willow?" Buffy asked before bursting into tears.

"Angel winced and tried to comfort her.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"I'm still alive," Xander said in shock as he patted himself down, before glancing around at the endless sand around them.

"I'm not going to kill you," Whistler said, "I'm going to push you through a portal into another universe where you may die, but that's all up to you."

"Huh?" Xander asked.

"Your life in this dimension is over, but there's loads of universes, so you can pay for Buffy's life and still get a chance at living one yourself," Whistler explained.

Xander perked up. "I don't suppose you take requests?"

Whistler handed Xander a metal briefcase. "Sorry, no can do. Put this on."

Xander opened up the briefcase and froze in shock. "I'm going to Marvel?!" he exclaimed in excitement.

"Whistler chuckled. "I can't chuck you into any comic book universe you know about, but that outfit will help you fit in where I am sending you."

Xander was already halfway dressed in his new black and yellow outfit before he realized what Whistler had said. "I hope you mean I'm going to a superhero universe and you're not just dressing me for a costume party."

"That's the real deal, kid," Whistler assured him.

"Wow," Xander said as he pulled on the cowl and looked at things through the build-in goggles.

"Now for the massive overdose of Pym particles," Whistler said holding up a small tank of pressurized gas that he opened.

"Wait, what?!" Xander said as the tank hissed loudly and the world expanded around the two.

"I'm bending the rules as much as possible," Whistler told him as they shrank, "but I have to do these three things to you in a specific order."

"And shrinking me in one of them," Xander realized, as he stared around himself in wonder.

"The second is to drive you insane," Whistler added, "but they never said it had to be permanent."

Xander froze. "You're going to drive me insane?"

"It won't last for more than a couple of minutes," Whistler said, "just long enough to be able to say I'd driven you insane and threw you through a portal."

"What kind of insanity?" Xander asked curiously.

"Multiple personality disorder," Whistler said cheerfully as he leaned against a boulder that had been a grain of sand just seconds ago.

"Well, in for a penny, in for a pound," Xander said.

"That's the spirit!" Whistler said cheerfully as he brought out a bust of Janus and a piece of chalk. He smirked as he contemplated how he was going to use his own ability to alter his size in the future. 'Goodness may be it's own reward, but nothing says you can't help it along a little' the demon thought to himself.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It had touched the host's mind, connecting her to all the invertebrates within an area defined by her mental strength, when it noticed an anomaly. The host has connecting to a fractured mind of her own species though its connection to a singular invertebrate species by use of a device.

Queries were sent out and replies received. A decision was made. A second host was chosen with minor links to associated concepts and data storage.

Both hosts shuddered and went still, their minds unable to sustain consciousness as their connections were completed.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Taylor winced and rubbed her temples, she could deal with the strange lights and sounds at the edge of her senses, she could even handle the nausea and weakness, but that little voice she kept hearing was going to drive her crazy… if not for the fact that she was pretty sure she was already crazy.

"Why am I hearing a voice in my head?" the voice asked, confused.

"You're not hearing a voice in your head, I'm hearing one in mine," Taylor complained.

"Great, I'm stuck on an alien world and I'm going nuts," the voice groaned.

"Alien world?" Taylor muttered.

"I'm surrounded by stiff rod-like protrusions that extend to a pretty tightly woven canopy overhead," the voice explained, "and the ground beneath my feet is unusually warm and spongy."

Taylor wriggled as she felt an itch near her waistband, but didn't want to expend the energy to scratch it.

"And the ground is unstable," the voice complained.

Taylor froze as a thought hit her.

"You are the ground," the voice realized.

"Yeah and don't head south," Taylor ordered.

"I don't remember shrinking… but then I don't remember anything right now," the voice in her head admitted, "but… this outfit doesn't seem to have a place to store anything anyway."

"Pym particles?" Taylor asked, just before a flood of information poured through her brain. "Ok…"

"You still here?" the voice in her head asked after a few seconds of stunned silence.

"Yeah," Taylor said, her thoughts racing excitedly but jumping in too many directions for the voice to make sense of. "If you are more than just a voice in my head and from the itch and sudden burst of knowledge I'm guessing you are, then the only explanation is that you're a projection."

"I'm a what?" the voice asked.

"You don't remember more than tinkering because you are a projection," Taylor explained, "I triggered in the locker, you're my power."

"I think I need the Cliff Notes," the voice in her head said slowly.

"I was stuffed in a locker filled with filth and bugs and left to die," Taylor explained with a shudder, "that caused my mind to snap and I triggered, gaining powers. I can hear your thoughts and was hit with a bunch of tinker data. You can't remember your past and as far as anyone knows telepathy is impossible, so you are either a projection or a split personality of mine… maybe both."

"I'm going to try and move out of your underwear, so we'll see which one I am," the voice thought firmly.

"Alright," Taylor said softly before biting her lips and trying not to wriggle as something small crawled across her skin.

"We've got light," an ant-sized figure said, his voice easy to hear, much to her surprise. "Built-in loudspeaker," he said, tapping his cowl.

Taylor smiled as the specs for his sound amplification system flowed into her mind and she understood it. "I have a projection," Taylor beamed. "What's your specialty?" she asked.

"Biochemistry, nanotechnology, quantum physics, robotics, cybernetics, artificial intelligence and entomology," he listed off.

"That's… a lot," Taylor said in awe. She hadn't really done any study of Tinkers, but it was a well-known fact that they usually had one area of specialty and in rare cases, two.

Leaping into the air a pair of wings unfolded from the back of his suit and he flew up to land on her pillow next to her head.

She reached over him and grabbed her glasses from the nightstand next to her hospital bed and put them on. She looked at the tiny figure and groaned. "I am such a pervert!"

"This, I've got to hear," he said, clearly amused. "How are you a pervert?"

"I put you in a skin-tight outfit, gave you broad shoulders, lots of muscles… and a large… bulge," Taylor admitted, blushing.

"He grinned widely. "Well, if I'm your projection then all I have to say is… thank you," the tiny figure replied. "I feel pretty good about myself and have no urge to drink."

"Urge to drink? Nevermind," Taylor said. "We need a name for you."

"Wasp," he replied.

"White Anglo-Saxon Protestant?" she questioned.

"He laughed and unfurled his wings, sending her reams of data on his costume and its capabilities.

"Oh!" she said, wide-eyed as she contemplated making a costume like that.

"Wouldn't work as well," he told her as she envisioned flying around. "I made this to work most efficiently at ant size."

Taylor sighed, disappointed. "I want to be a hero," she explained. "It'd be hard to do that if I can't make things in my size."

Wasp nodded. "I could knock you up a set of Titanium Man armor but the costs are in the millions. I suppose we've have to patent a few things first."

"Normal people can't reproduce Tinkertech," Taylor said. "Heck, they can't even maintain it."

"My stuff can be mass-produced," he assured her.

The door opened and she hissed, "Hide!"

Wasp dove into her hair as a balding, middle-aged man called out, "Taylor," and rushed to her side. Wasp tried to send calming thoughts as she told her father what was going on at school and what had happened to her.

Of course as details came out his mind drifted to thoughts of revenge…

Typing by: Jarreas

AN: And here we come to the end of yet another collection. Hope you've all enjoyed the ride.