A/N: So, this story is gonna start off a little AU, and end up getting more AU as time goes on. And since I've had a little issue this way with stories in other fandoms, I'll warn you right now: this story will develop into either SasuNaru, Naru x male OC, or some combination thereof. If you don't like romance in general or same-sex romance in particular, you may not wish to follow this story. However, I'm incapable of writing anything explicit, so rest assured that aspect will remain PG-13. Violence, on the other hand... I'm not sure yet. Graphic fight scenes are my specialty.

Sasuke was always the first to the training grounds. It was a fact of life, like how the sky was blue, or Naruto was orange. So when he was waiting for his team a week after returning from the Land of Waves, he certainly wasn't expecting anyone else to be around. After all, as far as he knew, Team Seven were the only ones to use the third training ground. So Sasuke was very surprised when he felt a strange pulse of chakra behind a nearby tree.

Drawing a kunai, the young Uchiha slipped around the trunk. He was met with the sight of a boy he'd never seen before, a few years older than himself. His clothes, all in shades of blue and yellow, were of a style similar to what ANBU wore, and his hitai-ate was worn as a headband like Sakura's. The symbol, a spiral, was one Sasuke had never seen before, though it looked very familiar.

"Who are you?" Sasuke demanded, pressing his blade to the back of the intruder's neck.

Two hands were raised from within the blue cloak. "I ain't here to hurt cha. I'm lookin for someone." The stranger had an odd accent.

"I don't believe you. Get up; we're going to the Hokage's office."

The strange teen stood with a chuckle. He was a head taller than Sasuke, and when his spiked hair finally caught the light, it shone a dull violet. Orage eyes gleamed beneath shaggy bangs; Sasuke suppressed a shudder. Those eyes were unusually wide and piercing, like the teen was looking into his soul. The closest Sasuke could think of was the gaze of ANBU Cat.

"Name's Chusei." The stranger shrugged. "Alrighty, I'm comin. Maybe yer Hokage can help me find who I'm lookin for. Lead on Ducky."

A hand came down to ruffle Sasuke's hair. He glared and considered cutting the offending limb off, but this older shinobi was being cooperative, if annoying. It wouldn't do to start an unnecessary fight.

"It's Sasuke," the Konoha genin informed the stranger. His only answer was a broad smile that somehow managed to be a grin without showing any teeth.

"Aw, but cha look like a li'l Ducky with yer hair all like that."

"You shouldn't talk," Sasuke grumbled "Your hair looks like you took mine and my sensei's and blended them together."

Most of the walk to the Hokage's tower went quickly after that. There was only one incident. As they were passing through a relatively narrow alley Sasuke, too focused on his prisoner, tripped over a trap line. This set off a series of catapults that fired rotten melons at the pair. Sasuke instinctively covered his head, silently promising painful vengeance on Naruto and Konohamaru.

But not a single melon hit him. Looking around, Sasuke saw slices of mushed fruit scattered across the ground. Chusei was wiping the blade of a kodachi clean on the edge of his cloak. The Uchiha frowned.

"You could probably get away right now, couldn't you?"

"Prob'ly," Chusei agreed. "But where'sa fun in that? 'Sides, I don't know where people are at, so I may's well go see yer Hokage person."

Strangely enough, that put Sasuke at ease. He was pretty certain nobody with ill intentions would let themselves be taken to the Hokage by a genin, not even the rookie of the year.

.L.I.N.E.B.R.E.A.K.

They were lucky; the Hokage wasn't busy when they got to the tower. The young pair was ushered inside. Grey eyebrows rose on the other side of the desk, but somehow, Sasuke felt he was the one who was most surprised.

"Is that an Uzushiogakure headband? Where did you get it boy?"

"Heya, Hokage-sama. Yep, sure is. My Pops gave it to me when I started trainin. Chusei Tatsumaki at yer service." Chusei gave an informal bow. It made Sasuke want to kick him for some reason. Maybe because the older boy's attitude reminded him of a certain dobe.

"So your father was from Uzushiogakure before it fell? I didn't think any of their shinobi survived."

"Nah, Pops grew up on the road. Gramps was the village boy. Anywho, I'm lookin for someone, Hokage-sama, and I'd be much obliged if cha could tell me where he is."

The Hokage meshed his fingers under his chin, looking thoughtful. "Well, that would depend on who it is."

"Uzumaki." That single word made Sasuke's blood run cold. And clearly he wasn't the only one. The Hokage looked like he'd just been hit with a C-rank raiton jutsu, and Chusei was scratching nervously at a seal tattooed on his left shoulder. The foreigner's face was red.

The Hokage recovered quickly. "I see. And why do you need young Naruto? I wasn't under the impression he knew anything of his heritage." The look on the old man's face promised Hell to pay, though Sasuke couldn't say why.

Chusei frowned. "Well that's gotta change. Dammit, cha're tellin me I've finally found Uzumaki-sama, and he doesn't even know who he is?"

That was too much for Sasuke. "What? Uzumaki-sama? That blond dobe?"

His outburst made Chusei frown. "Don't cha insult Uzumaki-sama Ducky, not around me. I said my name was Tatsumaki, didn't I?"

Sasuke nodded, his face still creased in Uchiha frown #22: unamused disbelief. He had no clue what the significance of Chusei's family name could be. Apparently though, the Hokage did.

"You mean a real...? Oh my. That does change some things."

"What?" Sasuke demanded. "What does his name have to do with anything?"

Orange eyes shifted from frown to glare, and it was directed at Sasuke. Like with ANBU Cat, it felt like blades of creepy digging into the soul. Sasuke flinched.

"Cha can prob'ly guess that Uzumaki were a pretty big clan in Uzushio, yeah?" Sasuke nodded, and Chusei continued. "Well, my clan grew up right alongside. We're s'posed to protect and serve the Uzumakis; we're bred for it, by now. But since Uzushio fell, Gramps and Pops thought there weren't no Uzumaki's left. Still trained me like usual though, last Tatsumaki and all. Then a few days ago on Wave, we're hearin about this blond punk callin himself Uzumaki, and Pops sends me out to check if he's real or not. Cha get it now?"

Sasuke shook his head. The Hokage sighed. "It's hard to explain to the young ones, Chusei. Only Uzushiogakure had such a tradition, with the intertwined Uzumaki and Tatsumaki clans. He has nothing to compare it to."

Inspiration seeped into Sasuke's head. "Wait... Is it like the main and branch families in the Hyuuga clan?"

That earned him a shake of the head from the Hokage, and another soul-cutting glare from Chusei. Sasuke wondered if this was how Naruto felt whenever he asked his stupid questions. If so, he resolved not to be as harsh on the blond. This feeling of wanting to crawl under a rug and choke on his own ignorance wasn't very fun.

"If cha're suggestin I'm like one of them branch Hyuugas," Chusei said slowly, "I'll do to cha what I did to them melons on the way here." One hand inched towards his kodachi.

"Enough!" The Hokage's voice froze the very air. "He's saying no such thing; he just doesn't understand. Sasuke, please take our guest to meet Naruto and the rest of your team. And both of you, try not to harm each other. I have more than enough paperwork as it is."

Grumbling and shooting each other dirty looks, the two young ninja's obliged. Sasuke tried to gauge Chusei's strength as they walked back to Training Ground Three. "So, what rank are you? Genin? Chunin?" Sasuke was pretty sure someone who looked to be about fifteen wouldn't be higher than that. Well, not except that man.

"Dunno. I weren't raised in a village. Gramps were Jonin Commander of Uzushio, but I don't know if he taught Pops everythin he knew, or if Pops taught me everythin he knew. I know lotsa techniques for sure, but nothin higher than a B-rank, and only one or two of those. You?"

"Genin," Sasuke tried to appear more friendly, shifting to glare #7: I don't know what to think of you. On one hand, he was jealous that this other boy knew some high level techniques. On the other, he wasn't sure the idea of being bred and raised to serve a specific other clan was at all appealing. Especially for someone who was stuck with Naruto as their last master. He almost felt pity for Chusei.

.L.I.N.E.B.R.E.A.K.

The pair made it to the training grounds after Naruto and Sakura, but still long before Kakashi. Chusei was immediately the center of attention. Sakura appeared to be having trouble deciding who to fawn over; it seemed that Chusei looked similar enough to Sasuke that he counted as "her type." It was probably something about the hair. Meanwhile, Naruto's reaction was to make a half dozen kage bunshins and examine the newcomer literally from every angle.

"Heya Pinky! Uzumaki-sama!" Sasuke was relieved to see that, no matter what he said about serving and protecting, Chusei retained his annoying lack of respect in Naruto's presence. His words caused those members of Team Seven not acquainted with him to freeze, however.

"U-Uzumaki'sama?" Sakura questioned. Chusei gave one of his flat, closed grins. Naruto suddenly found himself subject to a surprisingly brutal noogie, courtesy of the strange Uzushio nin.

"Yep. This kid's family and mine go way back. If our village weren't all destroyed we'da been raised together like brothers. My clan's born to work with Uzumakis... Mostly to protect them. They can be as durable as they like, but they ain't the smarted nin in the village, no matter how many of 'em made Uzukage."

Chusei dropped Naruto and adopted a theatrical thinking pose. "Actually, that'd be a bad thing, eh? Went though seven Uzukages, but it looks like cha've only had four Hokages. Maybe five Uzumakis in a row were a bad idea."

That made Sasuke snicker and Naruto yelp indignantly. There was, however, a twinkle in the blond's eyes. Chusei appeared to have said some sort of magic word.

"Wait... You're my brother?"

"Nah, not really. Woulda been raised like it though. Name's Chusei Tatsumaki, and since cha're the only Uzumaki around, it's my job to look after cha. So c'mon Uzumaki-sama, let's go!"

"Go where, hm?" The new voice came from a nearby tree, where Kakashi had appeared from nowhere. For once the jonin wasn't reading. Instead he eyed Chusei with what could only be called disinterested caution.

The Uzushio nin had a far more violent reaction. Shoving Naruto behind himself, he flashed a set of rapid hand signs. Seconds later, a swirling column of wind whipped up.

"Dai Tatsumaki no Jutsu!" The tornado rolled away towards Kakashi, momentarily blocking Sasuke's view of their sensei. When the air cleared, the tree Kakashi had been sitting in was bare of leaves, and an innocent log had been ripped to shreds. Kakashi stood behind Sakura, perfectly unharmed.

"Maa, maa, I'm not here to fight. I just want to know where you think you're taking my student."

"Uzushiogakure of course." Sasuke hadn't known it was possible for that strange, country-bumpkin accent to sound so prim and offended. "Now as we have an Uzumaki and a Tatsumaki, we can rebuild."

"It takes more than two people to make a village," Sakura pointed out, immediately turning red. Sasuke flinched in sympathy as she was subjected to one of Chusei's sould-cutting glares.

"We can find more cha know. I ain't dumb, though Uzumaki-sama may be a few noodles short of a bowl."

For possibly the first time Sasuke could remember, Naruto ignored the insult to his intelligence. Instead, the blond looked conflicted. Sasuke was surprised by this; knowing Naruto, he was expecting some shouted declaration about how Konoha was his home and he was going to be Hokage some day, believe it! But there was nothing for several long minutes.

"Can I think about it?" the blond whispered eventually, shocking his teammates. Chusei just smiled.

"Sure thing Uzumaki-sama. Take as long as cha need; I'll be right here."

"Stop calling me that." Everyone got another shock, as the boy who constantly yelled about getting respect and being Hokage shook his head at the (mockingly) respectful title. Chusei just smiled- a rather nice smile, when it wasn't one of his strange closed grins.

"Alright. What cha wanna be called?"

"Just Naruto's fine." Then the blond looked up with sparkling eyes. His toes dug nervously at the ground. "And, um, can I call you Nii-san?"

Sasuke snickered as, once more, Naruto found himself trapped in a massive noogie. "Eh, cha're a cute sucker, Naru. But nah, it's best cha don't call me cher brother. Chusei's best, or Chu if cha wanna."

Old memories flashed across Sasuke's mind. His heart rate flew up, and he was momentarily tempted to rip Naruto away from Chusei and protect him... But from what? The Uzushio nin was nothing like Itachi. Noogies weren't forehead pokes, that Whirlpool drawl was different from an Uchiha's cultured accent, and if Chusei meant to kill anyone, he would've done so by now. Sasuke took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

"So I guess I'll be stayin with cha while we're here." It was amazing how Chusei managed to bull through topics without Naruto protesting. Did his clan have a Kekkei Genkai that could make Uzumaki's shut up? Or was the older boy actually able to out-talk Naruto? "But I'll pay cha rent and all, so don't worry. Cha don't mind if all I can cook's ramen and takoyaki, eh? Cause Gramps never taught me anythin else, seein as those're what our clans seem addicted to anyhow."

"You can make ramen?" Naruto's eyes turned into little blue stars. Sasuke wasn't sure if this was more or less creepy than Chusei's orange glare. "Show me?"

"Course Naru. Tonight. I'm guessin from the steam comin out his ears that cher sensei wants to get trainin cha now." The Uzushio nin made to leave, but was stopped by Kakashi.

"Please, Chusei-san, don't feel you have to leave. I think we're all interested to see what a shinobi trained in the tradition of a destroyed village can do."

Knuckles cracked in fingerless blue gloves. "Alrighty then. Thanks for havin me."