So. I got this idea. And it is mad sad.

Everybody knows the song "Billy Don't Be A Hero," right? If not, listen to it. It's part of our cultural upbringing.

(So is Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Beetlejuice. . . but that's not important at the moment.)

So yeah. It's an EXTREMELY sad song about love and bravery and GAH feels. I sang the last verse earlier today and nearly started crying. That's how sad this freaking song is.

However, it is still a beautiful, fabulous song, and I will be able to write FEELS with it! Not a songfic, but definitely a fic built on the song.

Okay, so here we have something based on BROTHERHOOD, but the Drachman War has begun. . . and men are being drafted into the army. Ed has been drafted.

I'm sorry, I know character death sucks, but it. . . *takes deep breath* *ignores tears streaming down cheeks* It had to be done.

Welcome to hell. Please enjoy your stay.

He had known this day would come. He had left the military behind when he lost his alchemy, but he would never truly escape its hold.

A draft.

He didn't want to go, but to escape, to cut and run and never look back again, would only cause trouble for Winry and Al and Mei and Pinako. The best thing to do would be to accept it, fulfill his duty, and return home to his friends and family.

To his fiancee.

Winry was crying. Ed had returned from his travels in the West, and Al had returned from Xing with Mei on his arm, and for a month or so, everything had been perfect. Just the four of them, along with the elderly Pinako, in the Rockbell household.

Then the soldiers came, asking for one able young man from each family to help win the fight against Drachma. The State Alchemists were good, but Drachma was good, too. They had no alchemy, but their machinery was far superior. Rather than trying to face the might of Fort Briggs, they had flown over it. State Alchemists could only do so much, and after taking down so many planes, quite a few were too exhausted to fight the soldiers that survived the crashes. That was where the regular foot soldiers took over.

And damn if Ed wasn't the best fighter they could possibly have in their ranks.

(Except for Alphonse, but if anyone even mentioned Al entering the fray, they were immediately shot down. Ed wasn't about to let his baby brother fight in a war.)

Winry didn't want Ed to go. She was afraid to see him leave, nothing but a casual wave and his broad back receding into the distance, just as her parents' backs had all those years ago. Just as Mr. Hughes' back had more recently.

Winry never had gotten over her fear of seeing nothing but a person's back as they walked away into a dangerous situation. It might have been nothing more than superstition, but it was deeply ingrained into Winry's being to fear for someone walking away into the potentially lethal unknown.

She couldn't stop crying.

"Don't cry, Win," he had murmured. "I'll be back before you know it. Have an apple pie waiting for me, huh?"

Winry nodded, trying to stop the constant flow of wetness and failing miserably.

Ed sighed, then swept her into a soft, warm, loving kiss. His arms settled around her waist. He was warm.

When they parted, Winry whimpered, "Don't do anything too reckless, okay? Don't be a hero. Come back to me in one piece."

A soft smile was sent her way. "I'll be careful, Win. Trust me, I'll have all my limbs when I return. I promise."

Another soft kiss, barely a brush of lips, and he was on the train, waving to them.

As the train began to leave the station, he turned around to properly enter the car- showing nothing but his back. Winry's breath hitched in her throat. An irrational fear tugged at her heart. He won't come back.

Winry shook it off. Ed would return. She believed in him. He had always come back before. He had promised to come home this time.

He never broke a promise.

(It didn't occur to her that he'd promised the wrong thing.)

His troop was trapped on the hillside. The State Alchemists were over the ridge, and between them were a hundred Drachman soldiers armed with powerful weaponry.

"We can't give in, men!" the Sergeant Major shouted. "We've gotta hold this piece of ground until the alchemists get here!"

But how long would that take?

Never had Ed felt more useless than now. If he still had his alchemy, he could help these men. He could save lives-

But his alchemy had already saved the one life that mattered most of all. He didn't regret his sacrifice.

Still, they needed some help. Too many men were wounded and the Drachmans were closing in.

"Someone needs to get them," Ed whispered. "We need their help."

Sergeant Major Kingston scowled. "I don't like this," he muttered. Then he sighed and pointed at Ed. "Elric! You're fast." He threw Ed a gun. Ed caught it in surprise. "Go. Run for the State Alchemists. Get them over here." He gestured towards his other men. "The rest of you, cover Elric."

The men nodded, grabbing their guns and getting into position.

Ed was looking at his gun with something akin to horror. Not even five years ago, he had been determined not to kill, and he hadn't. Now, his hands were stained red. The battlefield had robbed him of his resolution.

He was a murderer.

A panic attack was quickly approaching, but Ed shook it away. He remembered Al and Mei's hopeful faces and his breath slowed. He recalled Winry's heart-stopping, desperate gaze and became calm. His grip tightened on his gun.

He would return home. He would keep his promise and return home with all his limbs intact.

He readied himself to dash into the heart of the battle.

(He didn't realize he was honoring a promise with a loophole.)

The bodies had been recovered, and traditions had been upheld. All of the soldiers who were recognizable were sent back to their families. All were shipped home by train. Many were in the carriages, happy to be free from the war at last. It was over. They had won.

Many more were in black, satin smooth boxes.

It had been a war riddled with losses.

Edward Van Elric was a hero. He had made it to the State Alchemists without dying. He had saved his whole group. His name was whispered reverently amongst his comrades, just as it had once been when he was the Fullmetal Alchemist.

He didn't hear the whispers.

Edward Elric was going home. He hadn't lost any limbs. He had kept his promise.

There was a letter that had been sent on a train that came a day earlier, to inform his family of his return.

(He'd kept his promise.)

When Winry saw the seal on the back of the envelope, she knew exactly what it was.

Ed's coming home.

Winry cried tears of relief. Ed was returning. Ed was coming back. She'd made an apple pie every day since he'd been away, waiting so that the moment he got home, there'd be one on the table. And now she knew he was coming back.

She couldn't bring herself to open it, however. Something about the stark white paper unnerved her. It should have felt softer, friendlier in her hand, like Ed always felt when she touched him. Bright and tanned and smooth and-

Winry shook herself and let out a little chuckle. She had evidently missed him and worried for him far too much.

It had been eight months since he left. She couldn't wait to tell him the good news. . . She laid a hand on her stomach and smiled. He's going to be so excited. . .

"Al! Mei! Granny!" she called loudly, hopefully rousing her sleeping (or drowsily moping around) housemates. "There's a letter here from the military!"

A door upstairs swung open, followed by heavy pounding on the stairs. Al came rocketing into the room. Mei came soon afterwards, eyes glazed but interested and smothering a yawn. Pinako was the last to come down.

"Check it out!" Winry crowed. "It's a letter! He must be coming home soon!"

Al and Mei whooped, albeit Mei's was somewhat confused, like she wasn't fully awake yet.

Winry couldn't stop smiling. Ed was coming home.

Only Pinako didn't celebrate. She had, upon spotting the letter clenched in Winry's hand, frozen in place. Eyes widened in horror as she recognized the bright white paper and the deep blue seal. She had received one of those once, too, when Winry was still a child. She knew what it contained.

"Winry," she whispered. "Oh, no. Please no."

Winry blinked. "What's wrong Granny?"

Granny pointed a shaky hand at the letter. "Winry, I-I'm not sure that's good news. Open it."

Winry couldn't fathom what was causing her grandmother to look so terrified. It was just a letter.

The sense of unease returned. Winry's eyes found the bright white envelope once more. It seemed to glow, unnatural and clean and. . . familiar.

(A white envelope lies opened on the table. There is also a letter. Pinako is crying over it. She tells Winry what was written in the letter. Her parents are-)

"No," Winry whispered, her breath escaping her. She turned pleading eyes upon her grandmother. "No, Granny, please, tell me it's not. . ."

Pinako was silent.

Al and Mei were confused. Mei grew more alert as Al asked, "What's wrong? What's in that letter?"

Neither Winry nor Pinako could bear to answer. Winry's hands shook as she peeled the seal away and opened the letter.

"To the friends and family of Corporal Edward Elric," she read in a tremulous voice. "On O-October 3rd, 1921*, Corporal Elric risked his life to retrieve the State Alchemists and save his own squadron. He delivered a message to Colonel Alex Louis Armstrong that allowed the troops to be saved. However-" Winry's voice cracked. Her breath hitched and tears began to fill her eyes as she read the next line. "D-Due to blood loss from several wounds sustained in this mission, Corporal Elric p-passed away the n-next day-" Winry stopped, unable to continue reading as her sorrow spilled from her wide blue eyes. She never should have opened it. No, no, nonono. . .

But the damage had been done. Mei was horrorstruck, with hands clapped to her mouth and tears filling her eyes. Pinako glared at the floor, angry at the wetness splattering on the floor from her eyes.

Al was wide-eyed, terrified, not fully registering the truth. Fists clenched and unclenched. A mouth tried to form words. His frame trembled as it hit him, over and over again. Passed away.

A long moment passed in which no one said anything. Winry's grip tightened. The letter tore slightly within her grasp.

Pinako stepped forward, took Winry's hands within her own, and gently pried her fingers from the paper. Wet eyes quickly scanned the remaining text, focusing on a single section.

"He'll be back tomorrow," the old woman whispered.

Winry didn't react.

Pinako sighed, her voice quavering. "Winry, he died a hero, we should be prou-"

Winry ripped the letter out of her grandmother's grasp, startling everyone. She tore at it, crying, and threw the mangled mess at the trash can. "I don't care if he died a fucking hero! He promised he'd come back!" Her eyes flashed behind tears. "You hear me, Edward Elric?! You promised you'd come back, you bastard!" she wailed. "You PROMISED!"

Mei looked away sadly. She felt as though she were encroaching on something she didn't belong to. She and Edward had never gotten along, but she did care for him somewhat. He was like an annoying older brother to her. Still, she didn't know him the way Winry and Al and Pinako did. She didn't feel the same pain.

Pinako, on the other hand, couldn't tear her eyes away from her distraught granddaughter. Winry had lost the love of her life. Al had lost his big brother. Mei had lost a friend. And Pinako. . . she held a hand over her eyes. She had lost her oldest grandchild. The little pipsqueak was gone.

Al couldn't move. He was frozen. His brother. . . dead? No, impossible. Ed couldn't just die. Ed wouldn't have gone to try and save his squad. . . But he would, Al realized with horror. Of course he would try to save them. Brother always tried to save everyone. . . Of course he would do it. Tears welled up in Al's eyes, and he closed them in anguish. Of course he did.

None of them moved for a very long time.

(He made the wrong promise.)

In Central Command Center, General Roy Mustang was staring at his own letter in shock. Colonel Riza Hawkeye had delivered it mere moments before, grief shadowing her russet eyes. They had seen this sort of letter before. They knew what it held.

Still, no one in the office of General Mustang had expected it to concern Edward Elric.

"So he died a hero," Roy said quietly. A bitter chuckle escaped his lips. "That's just like Fullmetal. He always had to put everyone else before himself." He sighed before glancing at his eternally loyal subordinate. "Have you contacted the Rockbell household?"

"Yes," Riza replied. "I called a few minutes ago. They-" Her voice broke. "They aren't taking it well at all. Winry hasn't left her room for hours. Neither has Alphonse."

Roy placed his forehead in his hand. His bangs hung forward to shield his eyes. "Not surprising. And Winry-"

"Nothing wrong with her, sir," Riza said quickly. "She's just mourning."

Roy let out a harsh laugh. "That could lead to problems, Riza." A moment of silence before he whispered, "This never should have happened. He was out of the military for good."

Riza didn't deny it. Her gaze fell to the floor. A couple of tears escaped her control, falling to ground, sparkling and splattering. She'd watched Edward grow up, seen him go from a remorseful, empty child to a shy, awkward tween to a temperamental teen to a proud, strong, selfless young man. And now he was empty again, but this time for good.

Roy, on his part, was trying to stop the pain. Fullmetal. . . no, Corporal Elric was just another soldier. . . But he wasn't, was he? Edward Elric had been part of many groups, but in every group, he always became something more, something different. A normal toddler? Nope, his dad left him. A normal kid? Nah, a prodigy without a mother. A normal eleven-year-old? Absolutely not, he committed human transmutation, losing his left leg and his brother, and then bonded his brother's soul to a suit of armor, sacrificing his right arm. A normal twelve-year-old? Please, he was a State Alchemist. A normal State Alchemist? Of course not, he was the youngest ever AND he saved the world. Even when he was just another soldier, he had to die a hero.

A few tears fell down Roy's cheeks.

"Sir," Riza said quietly.

"It appears to be raining again, Lieutenant," Roy whispered, reverting back to her old title.

A small, bittersweet smile appeared on her face. "Yes, sir."

"We'll go to Resembool as soon as we can. To pay our respects."

"Of course."

(He was always too special.)

Winry Rockbell couldn't move. All she could do was stare. His body lay in front of her, cold and stiff and whole but so empty.

He had kept his limbs. He had promised to come back with all his limbs intact and he had. He had kept his promise.

If he'd come back with every limb broken and his automail smashed to hell, but alive and laughing nervously through the pain, Winry would have been happy. But now. . . no, no, this wasn't what she wanted. She wanted him, not an empty shell.

Her hand found her swollen stomach, and tears began welling up. Her child. . . her child would grow up without a father.

The tears slipped out, accompanied by a choked noise.

"Ed," the lonely young woman whispered, her cerulean eyes shimmering with sadness. "Ed."

The pressure on her stomach increased. She was pushing, trying to feel the creature within, one of the only two living reminders of him left. One was Al. The other was her baby, trapped inside her, and she wanted to see her child, but she couldn't. One more month. One more month and her baby would enter the world.

But Winry didn't know how she would even last another day knowing that Ed would never come home again.

(How could she live when he could not?)

The funeral was big, bigger than expected. People from all over came to Resembool to mourn the passing of the Hero of the People.

Al hated it. All the pompousness, all the people crying over someone they barely knew. They were grieving for their hero, the Fullmetal Alchemist. They wept for the man in the bright red coat, the man who clapped his hands and saved a nation. Clap. Slam.

But a select few were not mourning that man. They were mourning the boy behind the mask.

Very few people had truly come to mourn Edward Elric in comparison to the mass that was remembering his mask.

The service was done in a church. It stung Al to know that his brother, who was agnostic, was having a service that talked of him returning to God's loving embrace. His brother believed in a god, that was for sure. But the god that he believed in wasn't loving in the slightest.

Did Ed even believe in an afterlife? A rebirth? I don't know. I wish I'd asked him.

Al sat between Mei and Winry. Mei was softly weeping. She hadn't known Ed well, but she knew him, not his alter ego. Winry was silent, but her face had been damp and blotchy since the night before. She hadn't once stopped crying for more than half an hour. She hadn't even slept. Al knew what had to be echoing through her mind.

"What are you crying for, Winry?"

Ed. She was crying for Ed.

Al closed his eyes and let his own tears slip out.

(They were always crying over Ed.)

As they left the church, Riza Hawkeye felt suffocated. She was surrounded by people bemoaning the loss of a great man. . . but they didn't know Edward. Less than half of them knew Edward. It sickened her. She bowed her head, her sorrow weighing her down. There was too much blackness surrounding her.

Then something incredible happened.

As the procession marched along down the dirt road, Riza caught a flash of color. Bright red. Surprised, she turned to look at it.

It was a girl. A young, pretty little girl with auburn hair in braids and bright blue eyes. She was dressed in a long sleeved robe, much like the mourning gowns of others in the procession, but hers was an eye-catching crimson.

She caught Riza's eye and smiled.

From behind the procession, Riza heard the sound of thumping feet. She turned around and gasped.

Walking behind the procession, each one wearing the same sad, reminiscent smile, were the citizens of Resembool. Some wore red. Others were decked out in gold. Not a single one wore black.

They didn't say a word. Once they'd caught up to the marchers, they merely joined them. But their presence brought a smile to Riza's face. A choked laugh left her lips.

These colors. . . They were Ed's.

She turned forward and caught Winry's eyes. They were wide, incredulous, and tear-filled, but when she saw Riza's face, she, too, smiled.

Al, who was only a few feet away from her, let out a breath and whispered to Mei and Winry, "It's almost like he's here, with us. . ."

And it was.

(He would always be with them.)

The little girl with the auburn braids and the blue eyes smiled at what she had accomplished. She turned away from the crowd of black, red, and gold- the colors of Edward Elric- and towards the man beside her, the one only she could see.

"Did I do okay, Big Brother?" she asked. "Can we play now?"

The man gazed at the procession for a long moment. Soon enough, however, he looked down at her with brilliant golden eyes.

"Sure we can, Nina," he replied with a watery smile.

The girl gave a bright grin. "Yay!"

And with that, the two spirits faded away, mixing with the rays of the afternoon sun.**

(He would wait for them.)

One month later, Urey Maes Elric is born, squalling at the top of his lungs. He has a mop of bright hair, the color of a field of wheat.

When he opens his eyes, they're gold.

(I will always be with you.)

. . . *tears streaming down cheeks* I cannot believe I did this.

*I crunched some numbers. If Ed was 16 during the big fight against father, it would have been 1917. He left for the West two years later, so that would have been 1919. Assuming he came back roughly a little over a year after that, it would have been in early February, 1921, when he left for the war and a little after October 3rd when he returned. . . I don't like math. I especially don't like this kind of math.

**OH MY GATE WHAT HAVE I DONE?! Oh, you know who they are. Don't ask me who they are. YOU KNOW WHAT I HAVE DONE.

Well. That went horribly.

Still, I LOVED IT.

I especially liked the funeral thing I did. Very sad but beautiful and perfect and stuff.

I did not actually cry while writing this. I feel like a horrid human being.

Still, there is little doubt that I would totally cry if I just read through it, so I'm not gonna do that.

RFF, PEEPS!

The word of the day is INDUBITABLY! Oh, come on. We all love this word. Don't deny it. Whenever you see it you just want to shout it out, don't ya?

Denial will get you nowhere.

Love ya! lulu