I Love You.
December 20, 2018.
Seattle, Washington.
Cristina folded a little pink onesie with a bunny tail into its box, and sighed. It was the last part of her present, the last piece of her gift to one of her best friends in the whole world, and it seemed to be lacking something. Or maybe she was lacking something.
Her supervisor groaned, strolling back into the room with their youngest son in his arms. "Do you have to look at all of them like that? It's really bumming me out."
Cristina smiled. Seeing him with Henry brightened her day, every day. "It's not the present, I just… I never saw her in this. I was gone, right? Or working?"
"No, if you remember correctly, that was my absentee stage."
She stretched her arms out behind her as he walked by, thrumming her fingers over his stomach. "Oh, yeah. Maybe she never wore it. What a waste."
"We could put her in it now."
"Right. I can't even get her to wear pajamas."
Owen leaned over the back of the couch, pressing a series of kisses down her neck, to her shoulder, and smiling against her skin. "I want you to think back. We have a special anniversary today."
"We do…?"
"Ten years ago, I saw you were having a bad day, so I took you down to the vent."
Cristina could not resist a grin. She tilted her head, and let his lips skate over her ear. "I was having a fight with Meredith, I think. You said anything could happen. I kissed you."
"Mhm."
Cristina hopped up, tying a quick ribbon around her box and setting it on the back of the couch. She took the baby from him, "I'll take that, and you take the present to the car."
Owen adjusted the ribbon, and smiled at the box. "Evie was teeny."
"So is Sara."
Cristina was proud of her family, even when half of them were screaming. Her twins were bordering on two, embodying the moodiness and irrationality that made kids so charming at that age. Her five-month-old was silent and thoughtful, always listening, and her four-year-old was the same way. Collin sat in her lap up front after a major meltdown in the back, Henry kicked his feet and cooed when the music changed, and Noah and Evelyn caterwauled all the way there.
Over the years their parties had gotten bigger.
What started as a few family gatherings with unwilling, antisocial interns, came to encompass everyone. Invitations went out to their coworkers, their friends, their mentors. Owen parked among dozens of cars, and the twins stopped screaming at the sight of a big orange bouncy house and plenty of other kids to harass. "Happy Birthday Zola!" was written in big yellow letters on a banner hanging over the entryway, and the massive lawn was fenced it.
It was basically a free-for-all.
When Cristina opened her door, Collin shrunk closer to her. She put her hand over his ear. He was sensitive to crowds, intolerant of loud noises, and grumpy because his legs were in braces. His surgery was two months ago and his legs still weren't strong enough to keep him up on their own.
"If you never put him down-" Owen began.
Cristina shushed him, "Not today. Please."
Owen twisted his lips, and shrugged. "Should I just unleash the demons?"
"Go for it. Steer them into the gate."
Cristina waited by the front of the car, holding Collin in both arms. He peeked at the party over her shoulder, looking uncertain.
She kissed his cheek, "You can stay with me if you want, okay?"
Owen unleashed the beasts, and corralled them through the gate. He left Henry in his car seat, asleep, and despite all that responsibility, he still managed to give Cristina a judgmental look.
She sighed. "What?"
"You should encourage him to play with the other kids."
"He doesn't want to."
"You're babying him."
"Remember last time I let you try your tough love method? He shut down for days."
Owen frowned, glancing at the party, and then looking at the little blonde who could not be less interested. "You need to reconsider getting him tested."
Cristina shut that idea down. "Kids can be shy, Owen. Fact of life."
"Cristina-"
"Come on. I can take Henry. Go catch up to the heathens."
"At least let him walk."
"His legs-"
"He can walk. He just wants to be held."
Derek came out, smiling brilliantly at them. He reached out for Henry. "If you need somebody to look after him, Meredith is experiencing slightly-empty-nest syndrome."
Cristina nodded. "Have at him."
She followed Derek through the crowd, breaking off from him, and from Owen, to do a little patrolling. It was a chaotic party, so Collin kept his face buried in her shoulder, and gave meek huffs to anyone who tried to talk to him. Cristina was content to drift around.
Zola was turning eight. She was all dressed up in a butterfly costume, complete with wings, and Bailey and Sophia were running laps around the party with her. Following them on stumpy legs, the notorious four hunted as a pack, stealing cupcakes and plotting world domination. Cristina sat with Arizona for a little while, enjoying the warmth of one of the little fires, and watching Manny scoot across a blanket on his bottom. Arizona put her fingers under his armpits and brought him to his feet over and over, but he had trouble balancing. She was joined by April, who let her ridiculously adorable spawn, Jack, hobble around and babble to himself.
She left them, and hovered around Meredith for a while, glad Henry was having a good day, and admiring the way she rocked him.
"Cristina!"
Alex and Jo had arrived. She pried Collin off her chest and set him on the picnic table behind her, standing nearby so he had little room to complain.
Her heart fluttered at the tiny bundle they brought with them.
"Dibs," Cristina said, shutting Meredith down when she got her hands on the baby. She took her delicately from Alex, cradling her in both arms.
Her name was Sara, and she had been born just a week ago. She was wearing little baby thermals, a cap, earmuffs, and she was wrapped in a wool blanket, as warm as she could be. She looked just like her father, which had amused Cristina to no end on the day she was born, and it still made her smile. Her eyes opened occasionally, getting a peak at everything, but she preferred to lie silent and still, sleeping, doing the newborn thing.
Cristina had not, at first, thought she would react so strongly to the kid being born, but she was so proud of Alex all the sudden. It was mysterious, and welcome. She loved him, and he had just taken a huge step in life – and he looked absolutely ecstatic about it.
When she had to hand the baby over to Meredith, she scooped Collin back up, joining in a conversation about the hassles of having a newborn, and giving Alex a few nudges. Eventually she strapped Henry into his carrier and found an isolated picnic table with a heater set up in front of it. She set Henry on top, a respectable distance from the heater, and sat beside him.
"I wish you would play with the other kids," Cristina said to Collin, stroking her fingers through his curls. He watched her silently, wearing the same gorgeous blue eyes as the mother he had lost. "I wish you would talk to me. You're such a good talker."
She looked at her littlest trooper, and smiled.
"And you, I wish you would sleep that good at night."
Henry was getting better every day. He was having less seizures, and he was working on establishing his day-night cycle. Derek was keeping a close watch on his brain and assured her that his deficits were limited to his vision. One day he would be able to talk, and walk, and tackle life, despite his rough start.
His brother was going in the opposite direction.
Collin was shifting from liveliness to withdrawal. He threw tantrums when he was forced to part with Cristina, and shut down, sometimes for days, and refused to eat. He stopped playing with the other kids and displayed classic signs of detachment toward any adults outside his immediate circle – he even turned away from Owen sometimes. Owen insisted she take him somewhere, let someone throw a label on him, but Cristina held out hope that it was just a stage.
Her immediate problems did not end with Collin. Across the party, with his hands in his jacket, having an enthusiastic conversation with Derek Shepherd, was the current bane of her existence.
Adham Farrah.
His eyes trailed constantly back to her and Henry, pinpointing them out of the crowd every time. So far she had avoided letting the two of them near each other, and she had avoided the hell out of Adham at the hospital. She kept his identity secret from Owen, not wishing to jeopardize their working relationship, and she had this bad feeling it would crush him. He knew she cheated, he knew Henry wasn't his, but knowing that Adham was his father was taking it a step too far.
Cristina tried to shake those ideas away, looking away from Adham, to the collection of family and friends at the party. She wondered how their lives would go.
Wyatt was there, bonding with the other interns, invited out of some obligation Meredith had to be inclusive. Cristina barely knew him, barely recognized him. She hoped his career would not be as rocky as hers. And then there was Alex and Jo, standing apart, already arguing about something in hushed tones. And Arizona and Callie, tending to their severely crippled, adopted son. She wondered if Sophia ever felt left out, because of how time-consuming Manny was. She saw the twins and pictured them as little kids, and then as young adults, and her heart clenched.
When she came full circle, all the way back to herself, the plan was already nailed down.
She was going to claw her way back to the top of cardio, maybe start a clinical trial, probably win a few prestigious awards. She was going to whip her interns into shape and mold the next generation of surgeons, and then send them off into the world, to be successes.
Thinking about it made her smile.
Collin put his hand on her cheek, curious about the expression.
"You don't have to say anything." Cristina cradled him, like she had when he was little, when he could barely fill one arm. He was almost four now, long and lanky, and honestly, unquestionably, her favorite person in the whole world. "From now on, things are gonna be different for you and me. There's a new year rolling in soon, and we're gonna kick some ass. You're gonna start kindergarten. Mommy is gonna go back to being a cardio god."
Collin watched her, giving a little smile at her tone, and saying nothing. He wrapped his arms around her neck and held on tightly.
Cristina fit her hand over his back, and laughed, "You're the best thing that ever happened to me, buddy. I don't know what I would do without you." She kissed the side of his head. "From now on I'll always be here for you." She reached over, running her hand over Henry's mitten. "You too, squirt. And the little demons."
A voice came from behind her.
"What about me?"
Cristina looked back, smiling at Owen. "What makes you so special?"
He laughed, coming to sit beside her on the picnic table. He put and arm around her shoulder, and looked out at the party, his eyes tracing little feet that dashed around the bouncy house. It was like he has a sixth sense for where the twins were.
Cristina rested her head on his shoulder, looking out at the party, instead of at his face. She could never say things like this to his face, only to his heart.
"I'll never leave you again, either. And I don't know what I would do without you."
"That's more like it." He kissed the top of her head, and then Collin's.
"You're so full of yourself."
"What else would I be full of?"
"Crap."
He grinned. "That wasn't very nice."
"I'm not a nice person."
"Where's your Hanukkah spirit?"
Cristina had something snarky to say, but when she looked at him and saw that beautiful, peaceful smile on his face, that silly expression that had haunted her dreams for a decade now, she lost it.
It was Owen, after all. It was this man, stubborn and loyal, with the same eyes as their daughter, and the same sweet smile as their son. He was a decade older than the first time she met him, and through the years he remained her constant. He was precious to her, and with all these thoughts about the future, and what she wanted for her life, his face rested at the center.
So, when she opened her mouth, she said, "I love you."
And he responded, as always, "I love you, too."
The End.
XxX
A/N: Here we are, at the end of the story I first published on the 5th of April, 2015, about eighteen months ago. I actually started writing it months before then, when I got into Grey's Anatomy for the first time, and kept dozens of chapters unpublished, until I had the substance I wanted. We have had our ups and downs on this journey, from the very first chapter to now, at a whopping 130. I thought about throwing this project away so many times, but you guys kept me going. It was your support and enthusiasm that kept me writing, and your suggestions and observations that molded this story into what it is now. I appreciate every review, and take to heart the things you say. Thank you for staying with me all this time and even if you started somewhere in the middle, or came in at the end here, that thank you still applies.
With that said, I have an announcement. This story will go on. We will pick it up where we left off in part two, which will be entitled, "The Weight of Us." I'm not yet sure when I will be posting it, but if it's not within the next few months, say by February (2017), you have permission to start harassing me in messages. Just tell me to stop being lazy.
Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed the ride so far, and if you want to suggest storylines or anything for the next story, please leave me a review or send me a message. It's story is still being molded. I love you guys, and you'll hear from me again soon!
-Jenthewarrior