She's heard the joke a few times, before now.

"I don't remember my life before my phone!"

"I don't remember my life before that anime!"

"I don't remember my life before meeting him!"

Usually she ignores the jest, rolling her eyes and continuing with her business, which often included hunting down a witch or thinking of newer, better ways to keep Madoka separated from Kyubey.

But, for whatever reason, when she hears the laughed exclamation from a group of giggling classmates as she's leaving school, she stops mid-stride and stares at the quartet in silent contemplation.

It's a ridiculous saying, meant as a joke no matter how serious the words may be, but somehow today it makes her really think about it.

The words are… surprisingly accurate, now that she really thinks about it.

Not about the anime or the phone, of course, but, if she changes the words a little…

"I don't remember my life before meeting Kaname Madoka."

Blinking, she's startled when she realizes she actually said that out loud, but luckily no one seems to be paying her any attention right now.

And those words are so right; she really can't contemplate the thought of lying in a hospital bed, waiting for one test or another to be performed to keep her heart in healthy working condition; she can't comprehend playing with dolls or doodling pictures, going shopping with her mother or friends like most young girls do; she can't even begin to imagine what her life was like before she met Kaname Madoka and learned about the world's true nature, became a Magical Girl and started this near-impossible quest to save her.

It is an unexpectedly chilling thought, to realize her entire world, the very purpose of her continued existence, now lies solely on one girl who doesn't even know her anymore.

It's terrifying just to think about, that she'd rather continue this eternal dance of blood and bullets and death all for one girl who didn't remember her, would never remember her, would always remain oblivious to the great amount of love and care Homura felt for her.

It was a terrible, scary, sad life. 'But,' Homura thought, mirthless smile twisting her lips in a cruel manner as she stepped forward, 'It's my kind of life.'

A/N: Akemi Homura is by the most badass magical girl I've ever seen in any anime ever. I absolutely adore her, and her utter devotion and determination to save Madoka is both amazing and heart-breaking all at once. I love it.
~Persephone