She was... the Love of my Life

None of the guardians were sure exactly when they noticed, but they knew it wasn't just their imaginations. There was something wrong with Jack. But, only during spring. Every other time of the year, the guardian of fun would be just fine. It was only during the springtime when the young winter spirit would be unusually silent.

At first, Bunnymund had waved it off with a simple, 'Ah, he's just being a bloody crank because his season's over, and it's my turn.'

But eventually, even he saw that there was something wrong with the young spirit. Instead of the mischief which usually resided in Jack's eyes, during the spring, there was nothing in the icy orbs but a certain darkness and longing. It was almost like Jack was grieving… every spring.

"Come on!" Toothiana was trying to say. "There's something wrong! We have to ask him about it!"

"Why?" Bunny asked lazily, kicking his feet up while lying down on a couch in North's main room. "He's a teenager. Permanently. There's going to be times when he's moodier than usual. We'll just need to live with it,"

"I know you've noticed it, too!" Tooth said angrily, flying over to Bunny. North stomped down the stairs and asked,

"Has noticed what?"

"Tooth here's freaking out about the way our little buddy Jack acts every spring. I was just telling her that it's fine, and that we should leave him be,"

"Like how we 'left him be' for three hundred years? Bunny, whether you like it or not, Jack was still a child when he died. A child that we weren't able to protect. Now's our chance to redeem ourselves! We have to make sure he's okay!"

Bunny looked to North for support, but the large man as stroking his beard. Bunny flopped back onto the couch and groaned, knowing he had been outvoted.

Jack rode on his wind straight to North's workshop. He had seen the lights. While he really wanted to help, Jack didn't know if he could. Spring just started a few days ago. It was time for him to remember her.

He imagined her face, and how dorky she was, and he smiled to himself. He really missed her. Not just sometimes. All the time. But he had a job to do. He was a guardian. That's why he was going to North's workshop right now.

He and his fellow guardians were going to make sure that all the children on earth were safe. All Jack wanted was to make sure no child died like he did. Especially not like she did.

"What's going on?" Jack asked as soon as he flew into the large room in the middle of North's workshop.

All the guardians turned to look at him. Jack squirmed uncomfortably under their gazes. They kept staring, and Jack wondered if he had anything on his face.

Bunny rolled his eyes and tried to say something to Tooth, but she just lightly smacked his face, and that was that. She hovered in the air for a second before moving closer.

"Jack, there's a child who's very sad,"

"So… how are we going to help him?"

"Sometimes helps to talk," North offered, patting Jack roughly on the back.

"Yeah… great. But that's not really what we do, is it?" Jack looked to Sandy, asking for some help. Sandy just indicated with his pictures that he saw the girl Jack dreamt of. Jack's eyes widened, and he scattered the sand in the image away before any of the other guardians could see.

"Oh, you're bloody dense! They're talking about you, you dolt!" Bunny huffed. Jack blinked.

"What?"

"Well… you've been a guardian for twenty years now," Tooth started, and she lightly touched Jack's arm. "And we've noticed that during spring, you're not quite… yourself,"

Jack shrugged Tooth's hand off of him. Was it their business who he grieved or not? He was a guardian, just like them, but he didn't have to tell them everything, did he?

"We just want know what is matter with you," North informed.

"It'll make you feel better," Tooth said, moving closer.

"No! It'll make you feel better!" Jack yelled. He didn't think he'd ever been this angry. Not when he'd woken up and found out he was all along, not when they practically forced him to be a guardian, not when she'd died.

Don't get him wrong, Jack loved being a guardian. But the job was kind of pushed onto him. He didn't think that everything with the guardians would be this pushy, though.

"Jack, you're still young, you don't fully understand-" Toothiana started, but Jack cut her off.

"Oh, I'm old enough! Old enough to be able to tell the difference between someone actually wanting to help me, and someone just trying to be nosy and get into my business! Gods, you always do this! You always try to force me to do everything! Just leave me alone!"

Jack noticed that he said 'gods.' Just like she used to. Even two hundred and fifty years later, she was influencing his life. She was personal, only his. Fun was all about sharing, and going with the flow. But she wasn't for his fun, he wanted to have her forever. He had never wanted her to leave. If he told the guardians about her, it would be like he was starting to move on, like he was leaving her behind, and Jack didn't want that.

Jacks anger spiked, and he slammed his staff on the ground. The ice that shot out of it wasn't pretty. It was cold, and dark, and dangerous. Sharp and jagged. Just like how he felt.

Jack glared at Tooth and North before half running, half flying out into the snow.

"Told you we should've left him alone," Bunny said from his spot on the couch. Tooth turned to frown at him. Bunny just shrugged and said, "What? Just saying,"

"You can't say that you aren't wondering why he's acting like this,"

"No, I can't. But, I can say that I respect him enough to give him a little privacy,"

Tooth was silent, but North rumbled from a couple of feet away,

"Still, I wonder what is matter with Jack. He is not usually like this,"

Bunny stayed silent, but sighed. There was just no getting through to those two. He looked at Sandy, and the round little man just shrugged before turning back to Tooth.

"I wonder… if it has anything to do with his memories," she wondered out loud.

"Yes, but… we have seen those, yes? Jack showed us to them years ago!" North pointed out.

"His childhood memories, maybe. But what if this isn't part of his human memories? What if he's acting like this because of his newer memories?"

"Newer memories?" Bunny hated himself for taking part in the conversation, but this was getting good. It seemed that Jack was just a spirit surrounded by mystery.

"Yes. The ones he made during his three hundred years of isolation,"

Jack mumbled angrily as Phil dropped him on the floor. He didn't even bother looking up. He knew his fellow guardians were looking down at him. He sighed out his frustration, like she used to do, and sat cross-legged on the ground.

It seemed there was no getting out of this. He liked his guardian friends, sometimes more than other times. It was at the times when they were this pushy that he wished they would just leave him alone. Their determination reminded him of her stubbornness.

He knew that Tooth only wanted to help him, and same with North. He has a feeling that Bunny was just along for the ride, trying to figure out another interesting factoid about him. And Sandy… Sandy already knew. He was probably just there to watch the guardians' reactions.

Tooth fluttered closer to Jack, and started by asking a simple, easy question. She asked what was so special about autumn.

"Why do you ask?" Jack asked.

"You seem so much happier when it's fall. Even happier than when it's winter, sometimes," Tooth explained.

Jack smiled as he thought of the season. It wasn't winter, but it was still his favorite season. It was cold, and it was windy, but it wasn't time for snow yet. So, it was still barely warm enough for isolated Viking girls to go on walks. That was how he met her.

"Autumn's my favorite season, you know," Jack said after a beat of silence. North looked surprised and asked,

"Why? Your favorite season, it should be winter, yes?"

"Don't get me wrong, winter's awesome. But autumn's definitely the best season,"

"Mind telling us why, Mate?" Bunny asked lazily. Jack didn't reply with anything sarcastic, witty, or even mildly insulting. He was too lost in his memories.

"Because autumn's the season I met the love of my life," Jack answered honestly, smiling softly as he looked at his hands they looked so empty without hers in them.

"What!" Whatever response Bunny had expected, it sure wasn't that. "Who?" The large mammal asked incredulously, as if not believing that Jack could love anyone.

Jack's smile turned sad, and his eyes darkened as he started thinking of her final hours. Of all the screams, the smell of burning flesh, of her eyes slowly dimming.

He cleared his throat and said her name, even though it was like a knife in his chest, twisting in his heart. He loved her still, but she was never coming back. He closed his eyes. He could still see her bright eyes, and innocent smile. He could still hear the warning growls of her stupid pet.

"Her name was Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third," Jack could feel the tears stinging his eyes, like they did on his last night with her. Jack looked behind him. He could be up and out in a second. But… she never ran. She always stood firm and fought through her hardships. So, Jack would, too. If only to honor her. "She was…"