Drunk

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

A/N-Just a humorous little one shot. Set sometime in Eclipse...

Jacob peered into the darkness. Even with his enhanced eyesight he was having trouble seeing anything. The night sky was covered in cloud and a brisk sea breeze made his hair blow every which way. He was glad that the cold didn't bother him. Where was she? He thought impatiently.

As if he could read his mind (which he more or less could when they were phased), Embry spoke the question aloud. "Come on man, where is she? I'm shattered. We have been on patrol most of the night and you drag me and Quil here to meet up with Bella. I mean why would she want to see you in the middle of the night?"

"Yeah dude," Quil chipped in. "What's the deal?"

"You two are like a couple of nagging women," Jacob grouched, secretly wondering the same thing.

"What exactly did she say when she called you?" Quil demanded for the hundredth time.

"I told you she sounded really weird. I mean she was all giggly and shit. Bells never giggles. She begged me to meet her at First beach at this time and to bring back up. After trying to think of someone I had to settle for you two." He scanned the beach again; still nothing.

"Very funny dude," Quil complained.

"Yeah, you should be a comedian. You're lucky that we bothered." Embry was getting very tetchy.

"Give it a rest," Jacob muttered irritably. He was feeling extremely tired as the after effects of the long patrol began to kick in. He had a suspicion that Bella's un-dead jailer stroke boyfriend had prevented her from coming. He was just about to suggest that they take a trip over to Forks when they heard her, or rather them.

"Is that laughter?" Quil had his hands behind his ears trying to hear better.

Embry cuffed him on the back of the head, making him growl. "Just trying to get the wax out of your ears." He quipped when Quil glared at him.

"Be quiet will you," Jacob admonished them as he strained all his senses to catch any faint sound or smell. A tense few seconds passed. A hint of strawberries drifted his way and his shoulders relaxed. It was definitely Bella and she had company. He began to run in her general direction and a reluctant Quil and Embry followed him.

As they drew nearer to Bella and her companions they were surprised to see them weaving about all over the place. One girl would head off in one direction and the others would follow, then they would collapse against each other in a fit of giggles as they stumbled. The wind blew their hair in their faces and they seemed to find this extremely funny too. Howls of laughter made the boy's ears ring.

"Jake," Embry whispered as they stopped a few feet away from the girls. "I think they're like kinda pissed."

"Bells would never get drunk," Jacob stated adamantly, sounding like an old school principal.

He watched as Bella fell on her ass, rolling completely over and then stumbling back onto her feet with the assistance of the other two girls. More laughter followed this little escapade.

Embry inhaled through his nose and then pulled a face. "Jeez dude, you can smell the booze. Look, your ice princess is even carrying a bottle of something. So are the other little hotties she's brought with her."

Quil rubbed his hands together in delight. "I bag the curly haired one." He crowed beginning to strut toward the girls.

"Oh my god he looks like a chicken. Stop him before he embarrasses us all." Embry nudged Jacob in the ribs.

Jacob batted his arm away. "We're not here on a pulling expedition. Bells needs my assistance."

Embry whistled the superman theme tune. "Are you gonna fly in and sweep her off her feet? Where's the cape? In the wash?" He quipped.

Jacob glared at him. "You go and control the chicken walking Romeo while I go and find out what exactly is going on."

"This is turning into a fun night I must say," Embry sprinted off after Quil and ploughed into his back, knocking him clean off of his feet.

"Hey, what you're doing?" Quil yelled out.

The girls had finally caught sight of the three boys and they collapsed against each other with laughter. "Are these the hot dudes you told us about?" The curly haired girl asked Bella. "They can't even stay on their feet."

Bella blinked her eyes trying to get the scene in front of her to stop moving about. She recognised Embry and Quil having some sort of wrestling match on the sand. Jacob was standing off to one side; shaking his head at them. As soon as she caught sight of her best friend, a soppy smile crossed her face as she flung her arms wide open, nearly knocking Jessica Stanley's eye out with the half empty bottle of Vodka she was clutching in her hand.

"Jaaacob Black, my bestest friend in the whole worrrld". She sang off key.

"Hey watch what you're doing girl?" Jessica grabbed the bottle and tried to pull it out of Bella's hand.

"Get off," Bella said fiercely. "It belongs to me."

The two girls pushed and pulled at each other but in their drunken state neither of them were in any fit state to win. Angela stood watching them quietly. She was having problems keeping upright so she had planted her feet firmly in the sand and refused to move in case she toppled over. She pushed her glasses up her nose as she stared at Bella and Jessica.

Jacob couldn't believe what he was witnessing. He ran past Quil and Embry, giving them a kick as he passed, and stopped in front of Bella. He quickly pulled the two warring girls apart and snatched the bottle of vodka out of Bella's hands.

"Are you drunk, Bells?" He demanded as Bella shot him a dark look.

She peered up at him. "Maybe or maybe not," she found this funny and started to laugh. Jessica and Angela joined in.

Quil and Embry finished fighting and joined Jacob. Quil began to puff up his chest as he grinned at Jessica. He gave her a flirty wink. "My name's Quil," he held out his hand.

Jessica stared at his chest. "Nice to meet ya, Bill." She took his hand and shook it formerly.

"No sweetheart, I said Quil." He dug Embry in the ribs as he started laugh.

"I know you told me, Bill," Jessica rolled her eyes in an exaggerated fashion. She turned to Bella and whispered loudly. "He's hot but a bit clueless."

Jacob and Embry doubled over with laughter at Quil's stunned expression. Jessica had rendered him speechless, not an easy thing to do. Bella decided to take control of the situation. She stumbled toward Jacob and ended up falling straight into his open arms. She gave him a silly smile as he gazed down at her.

"Jakey you're very hot too." She pulled herself upright and wedged herself under his arm. Turning to look back at the other girls she introduced everyone. "Jakey this is Jessica. She can be mean but ignore that. This is Angela, she's nice but is very shy."

Jacob gave the other two girls a wry smile. Jessica was glaring at Bella, while Angela just stared around. He wondered if Angela was even aware that anyone had spoken. "Err hi, these two idiots are Quil and Embry."

Jessica turned her fierce glare onto Quil. She marched up to him and poked him in the chest. "I get it, you're one of those men who tricks a girl by giving false names. I knew it wasn't Bill all the time."

Quil glanced helplessly at Jacob. "She's mad."

"Noooo," Bella giggled again. She pulled Jacob's other arm around her waist. She was feeling a bit chilly and he was like a space heater. She snuggled against him contentedly. "Jessica's not mad just veerrrrrrry drunk."

"I am not." Jessica stated firmly.

Angela wobbled on her feet and began to topple over. Embry quickly caught her and she smiled shyly up at him. "Bella was right, you all have nice chests." Two red spots of colour tinged her cheeks at this admission.

Jacob turned Bella around in his arms. She was wearing a beautific smile on her face as she batted her eyelashes at him. "Bells, what's going on? You call me and ask to meet us here. Then I find that you have all been drinking. You never drink."

"Ahh Jakey, Jakey," Bella shook her head. "We was all celebrating Jessica's birthday at her house. Her mom and dad went out and we began playing truth or dare."

The three boys exchanged amused glances. Jessica had sidled closer to Quil so she could get a better view of his bare chest. Even though he had lied about his name she was dead impressed by his physique. She drunkenly decided that brains didn't matter. The boy may be clueless but he was hot. "Hey I like you after all. Will you give the birthday girl a kiss?" She closed her eyes and puckered up to him.

Bella and Angela squealed with delight. They both decided it was a good idea. They copied Jessica and closed their eyes, puckering up their lips for Jacob and Embry.

"What do we do now?" Embry asked Jacob. Quil didn't bother asking; he planted a kiss on Jessica's lips and she threw her arms around his neck, nearly pulling them both back onto the sand.

Jacob just shrugged. "Well they did ask." He put his hands on Bella's waist and drew her nearer. He leaned close and whispered in her ear. "Last chance to stop me honey."

Bella made an irritated noise in the back of her throat. She held onto Jacob's shoulders and pushed her lips onto his. What was meant to be a quick kiss soon turned heated. He did try to to pull back after a moment, but Bella was having none of it. She wound her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. Who was he to complain? Jacob yanked her closer as their mouths moved fiercely against one another's. They only parted when they ran out of air.

They stared at each other with goofy smiles on their faces. "Wow, Bells that was..."

"Hot." She beamed.

"We did it, ladies." Jessica's loud voice interrupted their moment.

Jacob turned to see Quil staring dazedly at Jessica. Angela had slumped in a bewildered Embry's arms. She had fallen asleep and was dribbling on his chest as she snored softly. Even Jessica's loud pronouncement hadn't woken her.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jacob demanded.

"Bella told you already. It's my birthday and we were playing truth or dare. I dared the others to have a drink," she laughed at this and fell back into Quil's arms.

"And I dared them to kiss some hot boys. But Jess said we didn't know any. I told her I did. But she said that Edward didn't count. Then I said I wasn't talking about Edward and I told her all about you." She gazed up at Jacob adoringly as she spoke. "That's why I asked to meet you all here. We needed to fulfil the dare and now we have, well except for Angela, she fell asleep before Embry could kiss her." She babbled.

"So you were just using me then?" Jacob felt his heart thud painfully in his chest.

"No," Jessica spoke for her. "That girl has been crushing on you for weeks, she just wouldn't admit it. Old Eddie is a cold fish, I finally weaselled out of her that she was thinking of finally giving him the old heave ho."

Bella nodded vigorously. "What she said," she agreed, staring up at him with her big brown eyes.

Jacob grinned at her. "Why didn't you just say something? You didn't need to get drunk to kiss me."

"You know me Jakey, I always do things the hard way." Bella batted her eyelashes at him again, It was the same move she had pulled on him when they had met after years apart on First beach when he was just fifteen. He hadn't been able to resist her lame attempts at flirting then and he couldn't now. Leaning down he kissed her again, making the boys whoop loudly and Jessica roll her eyes in disdain. Angela just slept through it all.

A/N-Thanks for reading.