ELIZABETH MCCORD moved to the center of the stage wishing suddenly for the comfort of a podium to hide behind. Looking out across the room at first she saw a blur of unknown faces, and then her gaze settled on the table nearest the stage. For the briefest of moments she allowed her eyes to rest on each member of her staff.

Daisy and Matt, both ever determined to look for a way to take every moment and every decision and turn it into greatness. The two of them stood close together and she nearly laughed at their ridiculous belief that they were keeping their relationship a secret.

Jay sat with one hand around his wife's shoulders. The two of them bore the tired but joyful look of all new parents. She appreciated that he was bold enough to argue with her - sometimes he reminded her of Joey. They shared a similar sharp intellect.

Nadine smiled up at her, meeting her gaze. She had been slow to warm to her - the wall of the past ever separating them, and yet she had slowly, over time, seen a softening in her chief of staff's manner. And it wasn't lost on her that in the dark days after her return from Iran, it was Nadine who kept the staff together. It was Nadine who had calmed the staff after paramedics had taken her away. It was Nadine who had somehow allowed her to keep her dignity in tact, despite her endless outbursts after Iran.

And then there was Blake.

She had come to think of Blake as a small extension of home - the little brother she'd never had but always wanted. He was awkwardly protective of her, and had shown a compassion beyond his years in the days after Iran. He alone was brave enough to meet her at the airfield. Seeing him standing waiting for her had overwhelmed her and she had staggered so that Frank had to keep an arm around her, literally holding her up as she walked to him.

Her eyes met Henry's last. He had returned to his seat and he winked at her. She shook her head at him, her emotions much too raw to consider him with any honesty. She determined instead to be angry with him for keeping her in the dark.

She recognized she'd been standing in silence a beat too long. The audience shifted uncomfortably and drawing in a deep breath, she began.

"I am sorry." She grinned sheepishly. "I was just standing here thinking about my staff. We've been through a lot together, and it comforts me to see them here tonight. They've had my back through some of the most difficult days I've ever known, and so I know they'll stand by me if my speech completely bombs." She smiled and the audience laughed politely.

"I appreciate so much that I was chosen for this award but it is hard to feel worthy. Last year the award was given to Micael W. Schnieder. He was an army ranger who prevented the deaths of nearly a hundred men when he single-handed took out a squad of terrorists." She paused considering the sacrifice the young soldier had made.

"Two years ago, it was given to the widow of Principal Adam Geseki who gave his own life to stop a gunman from killing his students. And the year before that it was given to Melissa Watkins a twenty-two year old Marine who lost an arm and both her legs saving the lives of the men in her company." She paused and moved to the edge of the stage.

"I am a college professor and mother of three, recently turned world diplomat! It feels strange to stand here; to rub shoulders with such amazing bravery and sacrifice." She looked back to her staff.

"And when I think of the countless number of everyday ordinary people who stand up against injustice without any recognition, it's hard to accept that I am here."

"I've spent a lot of today thinking about those who travelled with me to Iran and died there. The Diplomatic Services Agents who died protecting me are never far from my thoughts. I cannot forget them or their families who have endured such heart breaking loss."

"This peace treaty was costly. It can be easy to forget that if you are reading it as a headline but when you are inside the story, you know that it came about due to the endless toil of those who will never stand on a stage and receive recognition; that it came about because of those who sacrificed everything so that the work could go on."

She hesitated briefly, but when she continued, her voice was clear and strong, "I am amazed to be standing here today. Actually, if I were honest, I'm amazed to be standing anywhere. I truly did not expect to return from Iran."

"The other night my family and I were goofing around - normal, everyday teenage kid stuff - teasing, wrestling, and laughing. And at the same time I was there with them enjoying it - grateful to be with them - to be alive and home I also felt such a bitter ache because I know Fred Cole's family longs for those days that will never come again. His wife and their children and his sweet granddaughter, Bella, will never again have a day like that because he dove across the room into a hail of bullets to protect me. And it's difficult to carry that. It's an experience that happens frequently to me now. My husband and I, my children, we all bear the scars of that attack. We carry the weight of what it cost. And it makes it difficult to accept this award tonight. I am just an ordinary woman; I'm a wife and a mother, and boss to this crew and employee to the President."

She swallowed hard, fighting to keep control. "In preparing for this, I watched the speeches from the past. I listened to Melissa Watkins, and to Michael Schneider and Angela Geseki and all of them said the same thing. We are just ordinary people caught up in an extraordinary situation and in that moment did what needed to be done because we were there. I did what had to be done because I was there and I could do it. And I don't honestly know if that makes my actions heroic. I don't know."

"Honestly, I was terrified when I went to Iran, but standing in Zahed Javani's house in the minutes before the attack, it was clear that this was an extraordinary time - an extraordinary day. I had to go, even if it cost everything. I had to act. It is the same thing described by Michael and Melissa - we had to act."

"And when I think of it all, I recognize that this is a truly ordinary and human action. We all feel it - the need to stand up to a bully, to reach out to a stranger, to take a friend's hand or to cross the room and talk to a pretty girl. There is a bravery in all those acts. And in those moments we don't consider figures or facts. We don't follow convention or protocol. We act as our heart directs. We act for the good of others. We display our humanity; the things that connect us all - that can unite us across oceans and despite our different beliefs."

She turned to look directly at the upturned faces of her staff, and at Henry.

"I'm here accepting this, but it belongs to all of us - the hours you put in. The way you struggled so hard to bring me back. I am grateful and know I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't because of all of us working together. Thank you. And you," She pointed a long arm at Henry, her voice breaking. "You know all that you've done, and I am still mad at you for not telling me you were introducing me tonight, but I am so grateful for you and your patient support." The crowd laughed at this and she was able to continue.

She turned and looked out at the room, "Thank you for this award. It is an honor. I accept it on behalf of everyone who fought so hard to bring peace between our two countries, and in memory of those who died for that peace. Let it be just the beginning. Let all of us, from the largest nation to the smallest child remember that the future is carried on our shoulders and we must be ever vigilant to protect it. Thank you."

***MS***

"So, you've officially forgiven me, then?" Henry asked her breaking away from their kiss. They rode in the back of the SUV through the early morning darkness.

"I'm still on the fence." She answered coyly.

"You require more convincing?"

"Yes."

"Well, that will have to wait until we are home. I don't do my best work in the back of a car."

"Well, I'm a little drunk, babe, your best work might be lost on me." She said resting her head against his shoulder.

"You did fantastic, babe. I told you that, didn't I?"

"You did." She sighed. "You did alright yourself. You are pretty good with words - for a fighter pilot." She reached up kissing his cheek. "I bet Dalton's numbers are through the roof."

"Hell, with him! This is all you, Elizabeth."

"Enough. We need to settle back into reality, Henry. I'm not . . . I'm still a terrible cook."

"Oh, God! You are the worst cook I've ever seen! I don't understand how you can be so intelligent and yet so helpless following a recipe. It boggles the mind!" He laughed.

"Wow! Brought me right back to earth, professor!"

"But you are still amazing and I still adore you."

He kissed her again, and rubbed his fingers along the soft skin of her cheek. "And how do you feel? Do you think you can make peace with it?"

She sighed, considering his question. Could she? Could she somehow lay that horrible day to rest? "I don't know. It's a part of me now; it's a part of us." She felt herself sobering even as she spoke. "I feel the burden of it; the weight of it is still here, but," and here she had to swallow down tears. "If I'm really honest, sometimes I feel the beginning of that panic; that icy, bleak darkness that nearly swallowed me whole."

"Babe, I wish . . ."

"I know." She interrupted him softly. "I feel how much you want to fix it all but, I guess I realized that this can't be fixed not really. And it hurts us both but I was broken by it. It wounded us."

"Elizabeth, you spent this whole night talking and thinking about it, and look at you! You didn't have a panic attack. You didn't fall apart. You are strong as steel"

"I'm not. You know I'm not. And I spent fifteen minutes in a bathroom stall breathing into a paper bag." She sighed and reached out, her soft fingers tracing the outline of his face. "And you know I'll be back in Dr. Mason's office, sobbing like a lost child again next week."

"Baby, listen, none of that means you are weak."

"I know." She said with a shy smile. "And the fact that even thinking of Juliet makes me shake with fear and anguish doesn't either." She nestled back into his arms her head resting on his shoulder. "I'm just an ordinary human but these days have been extraordinary. But they aren't forever, and I'm not alone."

"No, you aren't. You are surrounded by love." He agreed.

She turned her face up to his accepting his kiss. She felt suddenly drowsy and relaxed completely against him. "I guess I am okay. It's just that okay is different than I thought it would be, and I don't know how it ends."

"Sure we do." He said softly.

"How?" She turned to look up at him.

"It ends with me and you." He smiled and her face lit up with a matching smile.

"Yes." She agreed. "It ends with us."

***MS***

Author's Note: Well, I'm calling this one finished for now. And I will contemplate writing a story or one-shot revealing her letter to Henry. Honestly, though, I hadn't thought about what the letter would say. That's private between the two of them. I just figured she was so uber organized - she would leave him a letter.

I hope season two doesn't disappoint and I refuse to wish summer to speed by (I'm a teacher by trade so summer is still glorious to me) but I do wish for October! Thanks for all your patience. It took me a bit to finish this one. And yes, I do have one story I've been thinking about so . . .see you out there!